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(Local6)   Spanky the Squirrel attacks police officers trying to arrest his owner   ( ) divider line
    More: Scary  
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10389 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Aug 2005 at 5:37 PM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

65 Comments     (+0 »)

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2005-08-19 04:23:27 PM  
Story from local newspaper:
Gratuitous squirrel picture:
[image from too old to be available]
2005-08-19 05:23:12 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

Did he go for the cop's nuts?
2005-08-19 05:40:03 PM  
Free the squirrel!!
2005-08-19 05:40:22 PM  
The pic of Skwerrel Nutkin was only the second entry? For shame, Farkers, for shame.
2005-08-19 05:41:59 PM  
The cop said "Ah, you're nuts!" and the squirrel went berserk...

/got nothin
2005-08-19 05:42:51 PM  
Why am I not surprised to see the Fark mascot in here?
2005-08-19 05:43:50 PM  
The pic of Skwerrel Nutkin was only the second entry?

Fark Squirrel is an African ground squirrel, not likely to be attacking police in Massachusetts.
2005-08-19 05:44:07 PM  
lol at least thoses cops are good humored.
2005-08-19 05:44:53 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

Wanted for questioning.
2005-08-19 05:45:28 PM  
2005-08-19 05:45:41 PM  
"The claws are very sharp, I guess he mistook me for a tree"

That statement is so messed up I don't even know where to begin.

/I want a list of all cops that were hired as a result of additional 9/11 finding
2005-08-19 05:45:55 PM  
there is nohting that i could say that would contribute to the greatness that is this article.
2005-08-19 05:45:58 PM  
The fark squirrel is just awe inspiring. His confident, bow-legged rofl.
2005-08-19 05:50:46 PM  
Squirrels can have political views too.

[image from too old to be available]

2005-08-19 05:50:51 PM  
2005-08-19 05:52:31 PM  
after a drug suspect's squirrel attacked him during an attempted arrest

good. should have torn him to shreds for harassing the guy...
2005-08-19 05:52:35 PM  
2005-08-19 05:53:23 PM  
LOL...Even I can laugh like hell at this story.
2005-08-19 05:56:51 PM  
2005-08-19 05:56:57 PM  
From now on, when the cops come to bust me I am hiding my drugs in the bottom of my sugar glider's cage.
2005-08-19 05:59:27 PM  
Squirrels are evil! EVIL!!

2005-08-19 06:00:24 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2005-08-19 06:02:54 PM  
Some urban squirrels have been recently observed becoming quite hostile after smoking crack and listening to Latin Rap music.

[image from too old to be available]

2005-08-19 06:02:55 PM  
and just how long is a "shoulder-length away"?
2005-08-19 06:04:08 PM  
Osama will be using squirrels next, I can feel it. They know our weakness now.
2005-08-19 06:07:41 PM  
fark is going downhill ... I used to read all these stories hours and sometimes days before I'd see them in the paper or on the tele.

/Does fark imitate the media or does the media imitate fark?
2005-08-19 06:08:09 PM  
The Office of Homeland Security is actively infiltrating several squirrel terrorist cells.

[image from too old to be available]

2005-08-19 06:12:16 PM  
Disenfranchised young male squirrels are the most susceptible to radical Islamic propaganda.

[image from too old to be available]

2005-08-19 06:17:20 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2005-08-19 06:18:28 PM  
DrForrester for teh win!~
2005-08-19 06:18:56 PM  
harassing the guy

2005-08-19 06:19:31 PM  
Some squirrels have also been actively involved in the Special Forces sent to Iraq.

[image from too old to be available]

2005-08-19 06:20:04 PM  
Am I the only one who noticed
"I tried rasing them on the radio..."
2005-08-19 06:26:03 PM  
Apearently so
2005-08-19 06:28:04 PM  
Foamy has such a way with words...

You know what pisses me off? You know, when you're having a conversation with someone, and for some reason, you get on a particular topic. In this case, let's say... the topic is... nuts. Don't you hate how the other person usually has to make some dumbass sexual comment creating some kind of lame-ass pun based on your legitimate topic of conversation? Let's say you say something like "I'm not sure I like those nuts, they leave a weird taste in my mouth." Then the other person, in usual dumb ass fashion, just has to say something like "Uhh, you don't like the nuts in your mouth? Hehehe." And then he or she giggles like an idiot for a half hour because they think they made a clever joke out of your topic of conversation. These people need to be killed! I'm sick and tired of people warping simple topics into something perverted. And God forbid if you're a woman who gets caught up in some kind of twisted wordplay like this. Before you know it, everyone at school or work is getting on your back because you made a comment about a large ball. It's unnecessary, it's stupid, and it just shows that you're thinking with your sexual organs rather than your brain. This being the case, someone should glue your mouth to your butt, so they may illustrate the fact that you truly, indeed, suck ass.
2005-08-19 06:32:54 PM  
An on camera interview, an eight picture slideshow, and not one farking description of the injury.

And can I get an english teacher to look at this sentence:

"Officer Dwayne Flowers said he and his partner was attempting to arrest a woman..."
2005-08-19 06:37:35 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

- "The crankiest of creatures in the whole wide world, our next cartoon features Slappy the Squirrel!"

-- "Aa, enough with the singin' already!"

- "That's Slappeeeeeee!"
2005-08-19 06:44:07 PM  
The Bush administration has released the latest Intelligence reports revealing that a squirrel is now no.2 in the Al Quaida terrorist network.

[image from too old to be available]

2005-08-19 06:50:07 PM  
Yeah, those things are just plain evil...and unbelievably fast.

2005-08-19 06:51:32 PM  
"...and here is a picture of a squirrel, so that you're not confused."
2005-08-19 06:53:36 PM  
Gonads and strife,

[image from too old to be available]
2005-08-19 07:00:40 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

/teh gis
2005-08-19 07:09:01 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2005-08-19 07:12:43 PM  
The revenge of Squirrel Cop? (pops)
2005-08-19 07:13:12 PM  
see, even mother nature and the little furry critters are down on the evil porkers. its their karma.
/down on pigs.
2005-08-19 07:24:05 PM  
Crack..It's a hell of a drug..
[image from too old to be available]
Better bring a gun next time ya long tailed rat..
[image from too old to be available]
2005-08-19 08:07:24 PM  
Dwayne Flowers? No wonder the guy became a cop--he'll never live that name down anyway.

The only Dwayne I ever knew was very gay.
2005-08-19 08:14:02 PM  
Squirrels have even been invited to the Whitehouse.

[image from too old to be available]

2005-08-19 08:26:11 PM;s=2;p=news;dm=ss; w=320;tn=b
2005-08-19 08:32:38 PM  
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