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(Daily Item)   No happy ending for police officer who harassed salon owner needing someone to massage his nipples   ( divider line
    More: Strange  
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13400 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Aug 2005 at 3:45 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

47 Comments     (+0 »)
2005-08-17 09:42:37 AM  
Police officers making crank calls? Unpossible.
2005-08-17 02:04:08 PM  
Eeeeeew. Creepy cop perv.
2005-08-17 03:47:30 PM  
Jesus. Do cops just do what they want these days?
2005-08-17 03:51:04 PM  
Jesus. Do cops just do what they want these days?

Yea, they do. AS we can clearly see by all these stories, one can not trust a cop at all.

Unfortunately if we didn't have them, all we'd have is vigilante jsutice
2005-08-17 03:52:22 PM  
Bad cops trifecta!

2005-08-17 03:55:28 PM  
This cop has nothing but problems. Not only were his nipples exploding with delight, but I also heard his hovercraft is full of eels.
2005-08-17 03:56:11 PM  
"I've got nipples Greg. Can you milk me?"
2005-08-17 03:56:51 PM  
If you are going to harass a massage parlor, don't do it to a legitimate one, the happy ending places are less prone to turn you in.

/Just saying
2005-08-17 04:00:27 PM  
Love local stories on fark.
2005-08-17 04:01:18 PM  
this thread is useful without pics.

/Some things shouldn't be seen
//Cop man tits are some of those things.
2005-08-17 04:01:59 PM  
bdogg_72: "I've got nipples Greg. Can you milk me?"

Oh yeah. You can milk anything with nipples.
2005-08-17 04:02:15 PM  
During a call made on Dec. 7 recorded on the salon answering machine, he asked Ms. Attinger to massage him.

My god, what a sicko! Requesting a massage from a massage parlor??? The nerve!
2005-08-17 04:04:29 PM  
First I started laughing, then I realized this was just a few towns over from me. Now I'm scared...

/ a slash for PA!
2005-08-17 04:06:02 PM  
Can I just comment on how poorly written this story is.

I didn't think it was possible to make cop fondling that boring.
2005-08-17 04:06:14 PM  
Jesus. Do cops just do what they want these days?

And politicians, the military, firemen, corporate executives, even the general public -- doing whatever they want!
2005-08-17 04:11:48 PM  
How dumb would a cop have to be to use his own cell phone?
I mean he's a cop, he should know these things.

/not a cop, knows these things
// not a pervert caller either
2005-08-17 04:12:43 PM  
So they won't be exploding with delight anytime soon...
2005-08-17 04:13:36 PM  
It's a shame Jeffrey Dahmer ain't around anymore. He'd be a great roommate for the guy.
2005-08-17 04:13:40 PM  
what is this country coming to when you can't trust the police to be honest.
\or even decent people, for that matter.
2005-08-17 04:13:51 PM  
but his hover craft was full of eels!!
2005-08-17 04:16:20 PM  
not that he'll ever do any time, but I bet they give great nipple massages in the big house.
2005-08-17 04:20:48 PM  
Research & delelopment?

Do they research choke holds & the like, or do they Taser each other to see which one hurts the most?
2005-08-17 04:21:13 PM  
Wow it is true what they say, the best and the brightest do become police officers...
2005-08-17 04:21:54 PM  
This guy needs professional help. Lock him up!
2005-08-17 04:26:19 PM  
countertop: Unfortunately if we didn't have them, all we'd have is vigilante jsutice

story awhile back about the president of the ukrane firing all bribe taking traffic cops, and no problems,

bet this guy get 1 month probation/house aresst and councelling for his emotional disorder.
2005-08-17 04:26:50 PM  
bdogg_72 "I've got nipples Greg. Can you milk me?"

doombotOh yeah. You can milk anything with nipples.

"Where's Jinxy? Did you try to milk him, you sick son-of-a-biatch!?"
2005-08-17 04:27:04 PM  
>>During one call, Mr. Diggan allegedly asked the price of a massage and if a massage could be done while he was nude, according to the charges.<<

Loser. It's better when the they're in the buff ... What?
2005-08-17 04:28:49 PM  
I wonder what ms Attinger looks like...

/hum-aduh hum-aduh
2005-08-17 04:28:58 PM  
I saw "Happy Endings" this past week. It was pretty funny.
2005-08-17 04:31:41 PM  
no. this couldn't be. must be a mistake of some kind.
2005-08-17 04:31:51 PM  


Well, I hope the police are willing to pursue an aggressive policy against one of their own in this case.
2005-08-17 04:37:43 PM  
Okay, I'm slow - I just now got the headline. Happy ending... duh.
2005-08-17 04:38:43 PM  
Happy little nipples went to France ending?
2005-08-17 04:44:48 PM  
My nipples explose with delight!
2005-08-17 04:45:27 PM  

lousy razza frazza
2005-08-17 04:48:02 PM  
i'm not at all certain that vigilnte justice would be any worse.
i oftentimes ask myself just value i derive from this government. i realize that it provides a certain low comedy for the cynical but really nothing else.
2005-08-17 04:48:16 PM  

How dumb would a cop have to be to use his own cell phone?
I mean he's a cop, he should know these things.

/He was delusional, he thought it was foreplay. He had no idea that his actions were being interpreted as stalking.
2005-08-17 04:48:28 PM  

Love local stories on fark.

Yeah. Me too. They come with thir own brand of multiple challenges. First, sometimes it takes some digging to figure out where the Fark the story took place. Then it sometimes takes some real brain-bending to figure out just what the Fark the writer is talking about. And that's before egregiousness sets in.

/ Nootfote.
2005-08-17 05:06:37 PM  
Did he help himself to free soda too?
2005-08-17 05:08:58 PM  
Why bother this place over and over? Why keep looking for one that provides the "services" he was after?

The creep must have had a thing for someone in that salon is the only answer I can think of.
2005-08-17 05:18:22 PM  
Ohh, he had a "thing" for someone alright.

//It was Ms. Attinger
2005-08-17 05:41:11 PM  
There is such a thing as a nonsexual nipple massage, right?
2005-08-17 05:41:35 PM  
Dumb dude.

I hope he gets the electric chair.

Or, at least the electric hair dryer.
2005-08-17 05:49:12 PM  
feistyALgal: I hope he gets the electric chair.

ouch. harsh.
/thinks the hair dryer would feel good.
2005-08-17 11:27:20 PM  
Pffft, I"ll massage my own nipples thank you.

Now a prostate massage on the other hand.......
2005-08-18 02:20:38 AM  
"Overload the police with victimless crimes & other minutiae & eventually only creeps & bullies remain cops."
~ Rick Gaber
2005-08-18 07:54:09 AM  
I know a few guys that are cops, and they are perfectly normal, respectable dudes. I also know a few guys who want to be cops that, were they to be hired by some agency, I'd never step foot in that particular town again.

Point is, there are two types of guys that become cops: Those that sincerely want to help people, and those that are badge-heavy, powermad freaks. The trick for Police Chiefs is in making sure you're hiring the the former, and not the latter.

/The former are vastly outnumbered by the latter, quite often.
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