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(Mainichi Daily News)   July 21 is National Diddling Day in Japan, thanks to a quirk in the language   ( divider line
    More: Spiffy  
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15798 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jul 2005 at 12:11 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

171 Comments     (+0 »)

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2005-07-21 12:47:45 PM
2005-07-21 12:49:12 PM  
I have nothing to say about this, SO I'M GOING TO SAY IT IN CAPS.


/hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle..
2005-07-21 12:53:27 PM  
"Stirring the trough"?

2005-07-21 12:53:35 PM  
polish your gourd?

/got nothing
2005-07-21 12:54:09 PM  
What a retarded article.

Onanism is not about masturbation. From the Christian comic book, the bible, we find that Onan got murdered by The God Monster because he spilled his seed upon the ground. This wasn't the result of fappage but instead the good 'ol pull out method of birth control. He was supposed to be knocking up Tamar, his sister-in-law since his brother was dead and couldn't do the job himself. It was a Jewish law. I'm not quite ineterested enough to remember why but, Onan didn't want to get Tamar preggers and so he would pull out and lob his baby batter on the ground.

Its all right here in the writeup on Solitary Sex. Oh and the link the have there for the "Ijaculator" is very NSFW, but also for some reason hilarious.
2005-07-21 01:01:14 PM  
For as funny as that was, could you please use some censorship for those of us at work. I'm all for free speech everywhere, but bosses tend not to be.
2005-07-21 01:01:48 PM  
I have never seen more innuendo in article. I swore I was reading a thread in here or in some Teen Sex Chat room in Yahoo.
2005-07-21 01:04:19 PM  

Sorry. I'll keep that in mind next time.
2005-07-21 01:05:23 PM  
Shakin' hands with the guv'ner

/got nothin
//how else are you supposed to get to sleep at night?
///penis gourd
2005-07-21 01:07:28 PM  
Diddly? Giggity!

[image from too old to be available]
2005-07-21 01:07:43 PM  
"Cleaning up the yeast" is what my mom used to use when she wanted her privacy.
2005-07-21 01:08:11 PM  
BearToy: Onanism is not about masturbation.

I learn something new everyday at Fark.
2005-07-21 01:09:32 PM  
Thanks a bunch.
2005-07-21 01:10:29 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
[image from too old to be available]
2005-07-21 01:13:41 PM  
That article needs more metaphores for beating the meat.

You mean "polishing the bishop?"
2005-07-21 01:14:38 PM  
See, people?! THIS is why we need a Japan tag!
2005-07-21 01:16:00 PM  
It's true. Everyone is masturbating in the streets here.

/fappu fappu fappu
//knew a guy who fapped on the streets
///he was a Brit
////said it turned him on
2005-07-21 01:18:10 PM  
NCN: Shut up. He was Canadian. And he was me.

/Man the girls on the train home tonight were hot.
//Maybe because I'm drunk. Ish.
2005-07-21 01:18:22 PM  
Wait, a thread about women masturbating, involving an article where part of it is women being asked when and how they started, and not one Farker is asking the Farkettes to say when and how or anything about their habits? What is this, a UN sponsored Male Decency and Lack of Perversion Day?

/gets thank you notes from the Duracell people
//also gets pictures of all the children of Duracell employees she's putting through college
2005-07-21 01:21:16 PM  
Hey, that was quick! See you next week?

/the girls on the Odakyu line were hotter
2005-07-21 01:21:29 PM  
Penis gourd.
2005-07-21 01:22:47 PM  

You did notice how no one asked right? ;)
2005-07-21 01:24:05 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
Ya, see this is why they need to have in context advertising. Grandma shouldn't be allowed to watch you while you read a list of masturbation euphemisms.
2005-07-21 01:24:07 PM  
beartoy, one definition of onanism is masturbation.

2005-07-21 01:24:38 PM  
What? An article about masturbating and no one has done it yet? Well, here it goes...

fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap.

I tell you, everytime I read it in a thread I die laughing.
2005-07-21 01:25:15 PM  
I agree with Doggie McNugget

Flicking the bean is the funniest term ever created for it.
2005-07-21 01:26:16 PM  

Yes I noticed how no one asked, and I'm shocked, shocked, that no one did ask. This is Fark after all, I expect such questions to be asked. The absence of questions or requests for input from Farkettes has me wondering what's going on. Seriously, since when do we have threads even remotely related to anything sexual that are this decent?
2005-07-21 01:26:30 PM  
cargrrl82 So is that size D or 12 Volt?
2005-07-21 01:26:54 PM  
NCN: It was pretty quick. But you know what's funny? I already sent an email to Mainichi saying I hate Ryann Connell. Again. And I'll do it again until Ryann COnnell starts writing non-idiotic translated English.

/I will become his bane.
//Always wanted to be a bane.
2005-07-21 01:26:59 PM  
i just noticed that it's no longer the 21st in japan.

/thread over
2005-07-21 01:27:23 PM  

Notice that it's for some pain management thing. In other words, when it starts to hurt from doing it so much, click here.
2005-07-21 01:28:44 PM  

Onanism, in its original usage, does mean "coitus interruptus", a crime (be fruitful and multiply). Somewhere along the line (probably during the Victorian Age), masturbation was so looked down upon, the Church used the sanctioned Onan as an allegory to dissuade people from the practice. From there on, "onanism" has been synonomous with fapping, but in its pure, etymological (uncorrupted) form, it really means "pulling out".

Not the most scientific explanation, but I now can say ive sided with BearToy in a thread.

/scares himself sometimes.
2005-07-21 01:28:59 PM  
No Catchy Nickname: It's true. Everyone is masturbating in the streets here.

Japan must be a slippery place.
2005-07-21 01:29:09 PM  
Wonko Fortytwo

12 volts are a bit cumbersome, so stick with the D cells.
2005-07-21 01:30:18 PM  
Hey, good idea! Get Ryan Connell sacked, then I can take his job, which surely includes free random sex with all the porn starlets and desperate housewives that are featured in Waiwai articles.

/how about becoming a weatherbane?
2005-07-21 01:32:05 PM  
NCN: No, no. That's a weatherVane. You've been here too long, I say.

/will work on getting Ryann (who the fakr spells it with two "n"'s?) sacked.
2005-07-21 01:32:49 PM  
Wonko Fortytwo,

Don't forget about the Sears' Diehard.
2005-07-21 01:33:14 PM  

AGREED>>>Come on Drew, JAPAN tag!
2005-07-21 01:33:18 PM  
I sometimes wish I had the female plumbing. It must be alot easier to discretely diddle when it's all internal.
2005-07-21 01:34:14 PM  
ignoramus, you're right that it started out to mean ci, but along the way the definition was altered, or rather augmented. many words have undergone similar definition transformations.

and i believe that "spilling seed" was frowned upon way before victorian times.
2005-07-21 01:34:36 PM  
This explains why Asians eat a lot of cat.
2005-07-21 01:35:06 PM  
For us guys:
"Jalando las orejas del conejo"
"Pulling the ears of the rabbit"

I learned that one in Mexico.

/Favorite still "Roughing up the Suspect"
2005-07-21 01:36:23 PM  

Oh hell if you want that much power? Briggs and Stratton is the only way to go. Noisy? Sure, but the motor just ads to the vibrating goodness.
2005-07-21 01:36:47 PM  
mrmazoku, that made me laugh so hard, the person in the cubicle behind me asked if I was ok.

You owe my employer a new keyboard.
2005-07-21 01:37:31 PM  
Sticky is the word, I think...

Will you let me get on with my work??

/downstream inundation is where it's at, mate
//don't ask
2005-07-21 01:37:53 PM  
Jimmy James, Monkey Business Donkey Wrestler.
2005-07-21 01:39:25 PM  

Yes I noticed how no one asked, and I'm shocked, shocked, that no one did ask. This is Fark after all, I expect such questions to be asked. The absence of questions or requests for input from Farkettes has me wondering what's going on. Seriously, since when do we have threads even remotely related to anything sexual that are this decent?

Is the Hitachi Magic Wand really all it's cracked up to be?

/answer not intended for personal use
2005-07-21 01:41:17 PM  

Ok. I'll bite ( or nibble as the case may be)....

How often and where was the most daring spot?
2005-07-21 01:41:25 PM  
NCN: Right carry on with your work, AKA

/I can see you from here.
//I have a telescope.
\\\Yeah right there. That's the spot.
\/\/Has anyone else noticed that you want my bod? Better keep it quiet.
/></</Back to work.
2005-07-21 01:43:27 PM  
Flapping the Dummy...
Choking Kojak...
Cuffing the suspect...
Shaking hands with the unemployed...
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