Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(CBC)   Elephant to be fitted with metal tusks   ( divider line
    More: Cool  
•       •       •

4403 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Apr 2002 at 3:00 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

35 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-04-13 11:41:29 AM  
Why not just use some Krazyglue?
2002-04-13 03:05:48 PM  
... then led over the Alps and allowed to rampage through Northern Italy.
2002-04-13 03:05:52 PM  
TUSK! Hiiiiiiiiiyaaaaa!
2002-04-13 03:06:05 PM  
When they start implanting heavy machine guns and rocket launches onto these beasts of burden, give me a call.
2002-04-13 03:06:16 PM  
I gotta get me one of those.
2002-04-13 03:06:47 PM  
Great! Now we have Borg Elephants to worry about
2002-04-13 03:13:09 PM  
Next thing we know, the zoos will be populated with only robotic animals.

just kidding. I think what they're doing is nice.
2002-04-13 03:14:27 PM  
I want to say something funny, but i can't think of shiat.

Crotchrocket, i was thinking the exact same thing.
2002-04-13 03:14:31 PM  
I think this is deserving of the "Spiffy" tag, this is more than cool.
2002-04-13 03:15:31 PM  
I have a finger.
2002-04-13 03:22:40 PM  
They should rig him up to arc electricity between the tips like a giant stun gun. That would show those lions who is really king of the zoo.
2002-04-13 03:23:56 PM  
"If he breaks it any further up, it could go into the nerve and expose some of the nerve ending at the top of the tusk," said elephant keeper Bob Kam. "Then there would be some discomfort."

Well no shiat Bob! Can you imagine how large that nerve ending is?
2002-04-13 03:27:52 PM  
i got to do this on a security dog. didnt want to fark with him when we were done.
2002-04-13 03:33:29 PM  
All I know is they better make an action figure of this damned elephant. I want COBRA Comander to ride this guy into victory over the Joe forces... the terrorists *will* win!
2002-04-13 03:35:54 PM  
Cool, I live in Calgary but never had any interest in going to the zoo. Now I kinda want to go just to see this soon to be freak of nature.

... and throw magnets at it.
2002-04-13 03:39:12 PM  
Woohoo!! Post number 2!
2002-04-13 03:40:20 PM  
What? No picture?!

"But Spike wasn't satisfied."

Erm, how does an elephant let you know it isn't satisfied?

Sounds like the beginning of a joke.
2002-04-13 03:53:34 PM  
Babar the Battlebot
2002-04-13 04:08:13 PM  
2002-04-13 04:19:06 PM  
In other news, poachers are going into the scrap metal business.
2002-04-13 04:19:57 PM  
Technology continues to usurp all that is sanity and order in this world. When will it stop? When will we ever learn. Somebody needs to just hit the poor thing over the head with a skateboard and put it out of its misery.
2002-04-13 04:23:05 PM  
Hytes, I know you can appreciate the irony of the medium you are using to express your views.

Plus, that skateboard would have to be DAMN big!
2002-04-13 04:32:19 PM's the elephants first time visiting the dentist...
2002-04-13 04:37:44 PM  
Views? I have no views! All that I see is inside this monitor to which I am tethered by electomagnanimous forces gone terribly, terribly wrong.
2002-04-13 04:45:01 PM  
we need PICTURES, even if they are made up!

btw, will this be the elepahnt equilivent of JAX from mortal combat 3 ?
2002-04-13 04:50:15 PM  
So Hytes the forces are both electric and courageously noble in mind and heart?

I agree with the pictures idea. Since there seems to be no Photoshop contests going on, why don't people get to work on that?
2002-04-13 05:53:19 PM  
They should cut the horns and tusks off of all the living rhinos and elephants. Wouldn't that stop all the poaching?
2002-04-13 06:16:40 PM  
Heh...they said "Southern Alberta" and "technology" in the same sentence.
2002-04-13 06:18:55 PM  
Better yet, leave all the tusks on rhinos and elephants but give them some kind of automated defense system. That would stop all the poaching; who would fark with those elephants?
2002-04-13 06:48:19 PM  
Then put a monkey with a machine gun on his back. That'a an animal for man to fear
2002-04-13 09:20:02 PM  
Elephant commando, complete with AIM-9X sidewinder missiles!

Hannabal could have used one of these babies, eh?
[image from too old to be available]
2002-04-13 09:41:30 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-04-13 09:50:30 PM  
We can fix him... we have the technology.
2002-04-13 10:09:08 PM  
I personally think retractable razor-sharp tusks would've been a better addition, but this was the best I could find.
2002-04-13 11:11:24 PM  
I am the proud owner of one of them elephant "paintings". Thus, I am superior to all of you.
Displayed 35 of 35 comments

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.