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(Yahoo)   Malaysia's pygmy elephants being fitted with teeny-tiny tracking collars   (news.yahoo.com) divider line 30
    More: Cool  
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5382 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jul 2005 at 3:03 AM (10 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



30 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2005-07-04 01:15:52 AM  
Babar unavailable for research
 
2005-07-04 03:11:48 AM  
Now where will we find enough miniature Hannibals to put on them?
 
2005-07-04 03:15:22 AM  
There's a tracking collar on the pygmy elephant in my pants.
 
2005-07-04 03:20:02 AM  
The pygmy elephant has an appealing rounded appearance..

[image from news.bbc.co.uk too old to be available]

/window seat please
 
2005-07-04 03:22:38 AM  
I fail to see what is "cool" about putting a tracking beacon up some endangered animal's ass. Even with a beacon, to get any valuable research, someone is going to have to follow the animal around for a month or so, so why not just skip to that? If you can get funding for a beacon, you can get funding to follow a family of elephants around.. I mean, they're still elephants, not exaclty hard to keep track of.

The picture in this article, which is the only real reason for clicking it, is a major disappointment. An obstructed view of an elephant from behind. ("ohh, I wanna see a tiny elephant! (click) DOH! Stupid Total-farker gimme links!")

I'd just like to say that I submitted the article that should have taken the place of this article with a better article.

/Not an attempt to flamewar.
 
2005-07-04 04:09:26 AM  
macho_maggot:

I fail to see what is "cool" about putting a tracking beacon up some endangered animal's ass. Even with a beacon, to get any valuable research, someone is going to have to follow the animal around for a month or so, so why not just skip to that?

You must be so happy that your vast experience in tracking and studying wild animals in the jungles of Borneo finally paid off on Fark.
Thanks for your insight.
But shouldn't you be getting word to the researchers, that they're doing it all wrong?
 
2005-07-04 04:30:02 AM  
So you could watch two dots that continue to converge and separate on your GPS tracking screen and get your jollies off watching two pygmy elephants fark?
 
2005-07-04 04:50:05 AM  
wow the republicans are really a nazi regime
**************************************************
 
2005-07-04 04:50:39 AM  
Well.. the article does go out of its way to describe how docile these elephants are. It also says that they are being killed mysteriously in greater numbers recently. I think that "why not just follow them around?" is a fairly obvious question left unanswered. I'm no expert, but I imagine the answer would have some component of "we don't really feel like doing that much right now".

I guess I'm just one of those people who winces when they see a wild polar bear on some nature special with a huge yellow stripe on its fur with number (to be read from a helicoper), a bracelet, eartag, and of course, the tracking beacon suppository. They should just cut to the chase, shave the bears butt and write 'PWND!' Some people might call that "cool" instead.

BTW "researcher" != genius
 
2005-07-04 05:27:20 AM  
macho_maggot

I think that "why not just follow them around?" is a fairly obvious question left unanswered. I'm no expert, but I imagine the answer would have some component of "we don't really feel like doing that much right now".

I would guess it had something to with the Bornean jungles being relly dense and probably dangerous. Spending weeks or months following elephants around could be a logistic nightmare. And probably more expensive than following blips on a screen.

Probably the elephants would notice being followed, and might not behave naturally. Even though they are described as docile, they are still wild animals, and they might even attack humans, if they got too close to their home. Elephants do attack, I've seen the videos.

As long as they are just trying to figure out where they live, this seems a lot simpler than physically walking in their footsteps.
Once they figure out where animals hang out, they'll probably study them directly.

But what do I know.
You're probably right, they are just wasting their time and money. Screw them and their tiny elephants.
 
2005-07-04 06:18:30 AM  
Sorry about the overuse of "probably". Too much coffee.
 
2005-07-04 07:02:18 AM  
So you could watch two dots that continue to converge and separate on your GPS tracking screen and get your jollies off watching two pygmy elephants fark?

You may have stumbled on to the last unexploited perversion of the internet, you know? GIS for 'pygmy elephant porn' returned nothing.

If we jump on this, we could all be rich...
 
2005-07-04 07:20:21 AM  
Dansker: Elephants do attack, I've seen the videos.

An elephant attacked a friend of mine when he was travelling with some missionaries in Kenya. He was extremely obese at the time and I suggested that perhaps it was mating season. Amazingly, we still speak ;)
 
2005-07-04 07:23:42 AM  

Ohh, children, you just can't stick a drunk pig with a drunk elephant, and, and, expect them to do the matress mambo. You need to set the mood.



[image from images.google.com too old to be available]
 
2005-07-04 10:01:28 AM  
NineInchNader:

You may have stumbled on to the last unexploited perversion of the internet, you know? GIS for 'pygmy elephant porn' returned nothing.

If we jump on this, we could all be rich...


I'll set up the bedroom with the webcams, you go get us some hot little elephants and we're in business.
 
2005-07-04 10:06:28 AM  
That will help me find and shoot them with my midget gun.
 
2005-07-04 10:32:31 AM  
They're Hefalumps! Hide your hunney!

nickepic:

wow the republicans are really a nazi regime
**************************************************


Godwinned?

Then someone says, "You're in the wrong thread, my friend. You'd better leave."
 
2005-07-04 10:47:50 AM  
TheOther:

That will help me find and shoot them with my midget gun.

Don't even think about shooting my pygmy porn-elephants.
 
2005-07-04 11:02:32 AM  

I'll set up the bedroom with the webcams, you go get us some hot little elephants and we're in business.


[image from thortrains.net too old to be available]

Bow-chikka-bow-bow
 
2005-07-04 11:16:19 AM  
NineInchNader

Interspecial?
Well, I guess there could be an audience for that. And if there is, I bet they're willing to pay a pretty penny, so I'm in.

And the offspring should be really cute.

 
2005-07-04 11:17:30 AM  
HTML is not my friend today.
 
2005-07-04 11:18:00 AM  
Interspecial?
Well, I guess there could be an audience for that. And if there is, I bet they're willing to pay a pretty penny, so I'm in.


If you're gonna be a freak, be a full-time freak.
 
2005-07-04 11:23:36 AM  
NineInchNader:

If you're gonna be a freak, be a full-time freak.

How could I possibly argue with that?

I feel a business plan taking shape here.
 
2005-07-04 11:23:45 AM  
To save the pygmy pachyderms
Freeze their little pygmy sperms
When DNA skills are well honed
Perhaps that day they might be clwned.
 
Skr
2005-07-04 11:38:40 AM  
We found out recently that Heffalumps are actually pretty cool. They were just given a bad rap. Roo is bestfriends with one now. *grin*

Now the woozles that come in twozles on the other hand... the jury is still out on those. They do sound like Something You Wouldn't Want To Meet if you were a Very Small Animal like a Piglet.

I am still sad that Tigger's voice actor died.
 
2005-07-04 12:03:12 PM  
I'm relieved that these "researchers" have decided to leave my pygmy pony alone. Now I can raise me up some dental floss...

/fz
 
2005-07-04 01:25:31 PM  
They are putting GPS trackers on sex offenders now, so the "sex dwarf" pygmy porn elephants are a step closer to the "life of vice" you describe.

I gotta ask, how dense can the jungle be if there are elephants roaming around in it? What would Jane Goodall say? Sure the jungle is dangerous, but lots of tribes live there and make their livelihood harvesting the jungle, surely they have clues. You could probably pay a few of them in twinkies and burbon to follow a family of elephants around at a distance and report what the people need to know.

I wish there was one of these researchers here on Fark so I could tell them they're doing it all wrong. If I could get to hear "How does this idiot get to post on here, he doesn't know what the hell he's talking about." ...that sort of celebration of the freedom of commentary on Fark would make my day. :)
 
2005-07-04 01:58:57 PM  
macho_maggot

I gotta ask,...

Fine, but I know even less about Bornean tribespeople than I do about the jungles they may or may not roam cluelessly, so I won't even try to answer.

Besides, I'm to distracted now, thinking about interspecial safari porn.

I wish there was one of these researchers here on Fark...

If you can disregard my previous statements, I could pretend to be researcher and call you an idiot, if that helps? (But it's gonna cost you.)
 
2005-07-04 08:24:50 PM  
"Borneo's elephants were long thought to be a feral population of domesticated elephants from elsewhere in Asia, released in Sabah 400 years ago by the Sultan of Sulu," says Vertefeuille.

[image from badmovies.org too old to be available]
"Captain! The elephants - they're back!"
 
2005-07-05 02:41:07 PM  
lolz
 
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