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(Register Guard)   There are good ways to end an argument with your wife, but none of them involve driving your pickup off a 60-foot cliff   (registerguard.com) divider line 50
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9101 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jun 2005 at 11:36 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2005-06-19 08:55:45 PM
Don't drive angry...

 
2005-06-19 10:54:36 PM
He probably was arguing that he wasn't lost.
 
2005-06-19 11:40:49 PM
I blame the Sea Lions.
 
2005-06-19 11:41:27 PM
what if she was arguing persuasively to encourage you to drive your pickup truck off a 60-foot cliff? what THEN, submitter? hmm?


/pwned
 
2005-06-19 11:43:10 PM
What if the argument was about the end of Thelma and Louise?
 
2005-06-19 11:43:35 PM
He wasn't lost, just looking for a shortcut.
 
2005-06-19 11:44:00 PM
exactly why i am not married
 
2005-06-19 11:44:32 PM
But thats how I solve all my arguements. I suppose it's a good thing that I live as a hermit in the Brazilian rainforest and dont get into too many arguements.
 
2005-06-19 11:45:41 PM
What if they were arguing the acceleration due to gravity?
 
2005-06-19 11:46:23 PM
Ok, this is worse than cutting off his penis. Good grief.
 
2005-06-19 11:52:47 PM
YOUR APPENDIX???? OWWW!!
 
2005-06-19 11:54:34 PM
I wonder if the submitter is married.... during my sentence .....there were several times a 60 foot cliff would have been a welcome sight.
 
2005-06-19 11:55:22 PM
His divorce attorney will probably convince him that he's the real victim.
 
2005-06-19 11:56:02 PM
last words before impact:
"and another thing; you're fat!"
/wins
 
2005-06-19 11:58:29 PM
The memories of my family outings are still a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all pile into the car - I forget what kind it was - and drive and drive. I'm not sure where we'd go, but I think there were some trees there. The smell of something was strong in the air as we played whatever sport we played. I remember a bigger, older guy we called "Dad." We'd eat some stuff, or not, and then I think we went home. I guess some things never leave you. - Jack Handey
 
2005-06-19 11:58:51 PM
It's clear that the submitter has never been married.
 
2005-06-20 12:05:36 AM
Damn bench, DARWIN LOSES!
 
2005-06-20 12:07:23 AM
From the article:
FLORENCE - Two Eugene residents narrowly escaped a fatal plunge into the ocean Saturday after their pickup truck veered off Highway 101 near Sea Lion Caves, only to snag on a trailside bench 60 feet below.

Um... if both of them survived, and noone else got killed, how does this qualify as a, "fatal plunge?"
 
2005-06-20 12:07:42 AM
So_it_goes has it right....

The husband was reported to say "julie was offended when I used the word 'puke', but to me, that's what her dinner tasted like."

/more jack handey
 
2005-06-20 12:08:55 AM
Firefly4F4

I can only guess they submitted the word 'near'.
 
2005-06-20 12:15:01 AM
Firefly4F4: Um... if both of them survived, and noone else got killed, how does this qualify as a, "fatal plunge?"

Well, they escaped it, see? Much like I've escaped over 37 fatal plunges in the last 20 minutes alone.
 
2005-06-20 12:16:42 AM
Just for the hell of of it,if it came down to that point,I'd go out like the end of "Viva Zapata!"

/messy,but quick.

 
2005-06-20 12:20:33 AM
But they DO involve a shell from a thirty-ought-six through her ungreatful little skull.
 
2005-06-20 12:28:17 AM
Th problem I see here is the submitter's unwarranted assumption that driving off a 60-foot cliff ended the argument. Because of only minor injuries? Submitter must neither have been married nor known many others who are/have been.
 
2005-06-20 12:28:59 AM
I've had arguments with my wife where a 60 foot plunge off a cliff would have really felt like a victory.
 
2005-06-20 12:29:32 AM
Poor guy. He probably finally agreed to ask a sea lion for directions and she wasn't happy with that, either.
 
2005-06-20 12:33:55 AM
Shame he lived and will have to hear about this forever now.
 
2005-06-20 12:39:46 AM
The Larch: Much like I've escaped over 37 fatal plunges in the last 20 minutes alone.

Only 37? Slacker! Ask anyone who knows me and they'll tell you that I risk a fatal plunge every time I move. ;)

/Notoriously clumsy and uncoordinated, I am.
 
2005-06-20 12:43:55 AM
ha, Ford owners surrender

/Ford owner
 
2005-06-20 12:47:27 AM
If it was my truck I would have just put it in four wheel drive and drove it out of there.
 
2005-06-20 12:57:07 AM
Escaped a fatal plunge. I know the area. If you went past were he was caught. You wouldn't live. NO WAY POSSIBLE.

Certain Death
 
2005-06-20 01:09:30 AM
anyone that clameth to win, is the bigeth loser.
 
2005-06-20 01:13:05 AM
Myself, having stupidly suffered through the chaotic hell of marriage, twice, is of the opinion dude man is cursing his luck right about now. He was so close to peace; to have it snatched away at the in brink must be excruciating. Better off dead than married, that's what I say.......

/going to stick his head in an oven, right after this tumbler of bourbon is exhausted
 
2005-06-20 01:15:04 AM
You know, this deserves an "Intelligent Design" tag.

I mean, idiot drives truck off cliff and lives, that's surely proof that Jeebus loves us all . . . Let's all go get saved and bash some gay baby scientist whales!

Oh, wait. . . It was a Ford truck. You don't need no savior blood when you're Built Ford Tough!!!!

/Seriously, if that were a Dodge, they'd be pate
//Unless there really is a God or something
/// Naaaaaaah. . .
 
2005-06-20 01:20:23 AM
Funny thing about driving your car off a cliff is, I bet you're still hitting those brakes.
-Jack Handey
 
2005-06-20 01:26:42 AM
If I have to lose an argument, I'd like to lose it that way. Except I'd be running, not driving, and I'd be chased by hordes of attractive topless women wearing bicycle helmets.
 
2005-06-20 01:39:11 AM
now every fight they have will end with "What are you going to do? Drive me over another cliff?"
 
2005-06-20 01:42:24 AM
Sounds like a country song?
 
2005-06-20 01:43:31 AM
Why do a lot of people here seem to assume that it was the woman's fault?
 
2005-06-20 01:49:29 AM
SuperstarGoddess:

Why do a lot of people here seem to assume that it was the woman's fault?

It's just the odds; that's all..... Don't take it personal.
 
2005-06-20 01:51:15 AM
Maybe he just misunderstood when she asked him to take the nasty plunge.
 
2005-06-20 01:52:04 AM
SuperstarGoddess: Why do a lot of people here seem to assume that it was the woman's fault?

Because a woman was involved ;) Plus, blaming gravity would just be silly.
 
2005-06-20 02:04:43 AM
If that bench had not been there, They might have been Seal-O-Meals
 
2005-06-20 02:22:59 AM
with props to Lurk3r:

 
2005-06-20 03:30:42 AM
Firefly4F4...they probably used the same rationale as those who refer to 2 airplanes almost colliding as a "near miss".
God Bless the FAA! Ha!
 
2005-06-20 04:21:55 AM
Am I the only one who thinks that she wasn't supposed to make it out of the truck? I really don't think he lost control, I think he was going for a divorce the OLD fashion way.
 
2005-06-20 08:56:31 AM
Poor Darwin. Blue balls suck.
 
2005-06-20 10:38:12 AM
 
2005-06-20 01:16:37 PM
Hey, we've all been there.
 
2005-06-20 07:57:52 PM
No one hotlinked the photo?



PWN3D!

/or something...
 
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