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(Chicago Sun-Times)   Abandoned otter pup learning to survive at aquarium by being fed mixture of clam and squid juices, cod liver oil, cow's milk and vitamins; sleeping in playpen lined with SpongeBob SquarePants sheets   (suntimes.com ) divider line
    More: Sappy  
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8947 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jun 2005 at 3:13 PM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-06-16 04:21:08 PM  
Don't know why nectar_of_the_goddess, but that just struck me as hysterical. I'll never tire of the "stay off my lawn!" cliche.

/is it a cliche yet?
 
2005-06-16 04:27:25 PM  
Otters are awesome. Their philosophy: eat, sleep, make love, excrete and above all play your heart out. There is no animal on Earth that loves life so much. Otters just don't get depressed. Beautiful critters. I got to care for one at a Science Center and Junior Museum and he was just the funniest beast ever. When we let him loose in the center with two ferrets it was bedlam. They somehow went straight for the coat closet, the otter grabbed the coats and then all three began rolling around and grunting and yipping and basically tearing everyone's coats to shreads and not one of us could stop laughing. Just good times.
 
2005-06-16 04:29:55 PM  
otter said to be responding badly after discovering hole in the washtub...
 
2005-06-16 04:58:35 PM  
Sponge Bob sheets? Are they trying to see if they can force an Otter to become gay?

/Didn't RTFA
//Otters are cool
///Sponge Bob is gay
////Slashy slashy
 
2005-06-16 05:05:59 PM  
Land Otters are a lot cooler thin sea otters, Sea otters just float around, Land otters go places and do things, see them all the time when im out on walks.

They have never been officially domesticated, but I read that they often were and are supposed to be good to fetch ducks while duckhunting.

And yes, I used to have a couple of Ferrets too. They are cool.
 
2005-06-16 05:13:56 PM  
Davyngyre:

Land Otters are a lot cooler thin sea otters, Sea otters just float around, Land otters go places and do things, see them all the time when im out on walks.


Land otters? Do you mean river otters?
 
2005-06-16 05:15:18 PM  
Isuldirs: A sea otter's fur is so thick, said Whiton, that one square inch of it could cover a typical German shepherd.

I really don't know how they tested this.

Nor do I want to.
 
2005-06-16 05:20:47 PM  
Riverbottom Nightmare Band owns you all!
Suck it, worthless Otters!
 
2005-06-16 05:44:08 PM  
Yay! Otters!

/does little happy dance
 
2005-06-16 05:46:22 PM  
Semi-relevant Dr. Katz:

Talk Show

Woman in Audience: Listen, sea pig--"

Manatee: "I'm a manatee!

Woman in Audience; " "You gotta get a job."

Manatee: "I live in the ocean!"

Woman: "Whatever, talk to my hand *applause* You FAT because you ain't got no JOB!

Manatee: I have a layer of blubber to keep me warm in the winter.
 
2005-06-16 05:47:25 PM  
And when it's full-grown, otter-skin coat, right?
 
2005-06-16 05:48:34 PM  
Woman in Audience: Listen, sea pig--"

That's Jim Gaffigan.
 
2005-06-16 05:51:11 PM  
Am I the only one who thinks Sandy looks HAWT in a bikini?

[image from spongezone.net too old to be available]
 
2005-06-16 05:56:35 PM  
[image from vasilcastle.com too old to be available]
 
2005-06-16 06:14:54 PM  
sooterkin!

/highly obscure
 
2005-06-16 07:25:37 PM  
I've been told by Gramp a long time ago of a country veterinarian near the border between France and Switzerland who used to rescue and host all sort of wild animals that were found sick or hurt in the surrounding countryside (at least, the lucky ones not blasted by ). He got as patients all sort of wild animals in his chuntersonverted farm: boar, deer, wild cat, chamois, hawk, ferret, and so on.

And he hosted a couple river otters, too. A male and a female. I have no idea how or why the guy got these otters as they are quite rare nowadays, but, according to my Gramp, they were amongst his longest term "pets".

The verdict is: otters are otterrific animals, great companions, fiendishly smart, full of a simply unbelievable amount of energy, and able to spontaneously generate a staggering amount of domestic catastrophes in the blink of an eye. They need a river nearby to be happy, meaning that everything in the house located at less than 5 feet from the ground is wet. Otters are extremely curious, and their cute tiny little hands coupled with an uncanny eye for the stupidest thing to do enables them to easily open doors, open closets, open boxes, open foodbags, re-order clothes and papers and tablewares (often forcing the humans reordering stuff to reorder them too ), open/move/throw/hide/fetch/break anything not firmly anchored to the ground, preferably welded.
They even managed to learn to unlock a food closet after having identified the necessary item (the key), having located its hiding place (this box), having decided between them who would grab the loot and run and who would lure the Guardian of the Foodstuff away by creating a clothestorm in another room.

The veterinarian decided enough was enough when, after having stored all the keys of the house in a chest with a hard-to-open lock, he surprised one of the little monsters trying to lockpick the Closet of the Food with a bit of iron wire. He released them in a natural preserve 150 km from his home.
 
2005-06-16 07:31:12 PM  
ahem. hunters, please, get out of the converted farm and go back within the parentheses, thank you.

/preview, preview.
 
2005-06-16 07:32:14 PM  
Why could I not stop giggling when I saw an ad for Beefeater Gin on that story's page?
 
2005-06-16 07:37:46 PM  
Every time I read one of these sappy orphaned/injured animal articles, I always think of this guy:

[image from salooncrew.com too old to be available]

Damn you Strong Bad! Damn you!
 
2005-06-16 07:48:46 PM  
This picture was asking for it.

[image from members.cox.net too old to be available]
 
2005-06-16 07:57:28 PM  
Iron Chef Morimoto

Woman in Audience: Listen, sea pig--"
That's Jim Gaffigan.


Well, my fine sir, thanks to IMDB, I see that YOUR Jim did INDEED do an episode of Dr. Katz. Kudos to you on your good call!

Dr. Katz used to be pretty funny. I didn't always know the comics (except for obvious ones like Ray Romano) and the squiggle-vision gave me seizures, but it was worth a late night watch.
 
2005-06-16 08:29:51 PM  
[image from home.pacbell.net too old to be available]

Dude, check me out! I'm like an otter, a sexy little otter!
 
2005-06-16 08:32:24 PM  
I thought with everybody posting otter pics...
[image from img107.echo.cx too old to be available]
...I'd post one of a water 'otter too!!
 
2005-06-16 10:18:45 PM  
Shadow Blasko

I'm 18 and I remember that movie. True, what I saw was a rerun, but at least I saw it before it went to Christmas special limbo, never to be aired again.
 
2005-06-16 11:02:28 PM  
alephtau

I think otters should be the first candidates for uplift. Screw chimpanzees. Chimps are mean, cannibalistic, territorial, and violent (just like humans). Otters are chill.
 
2005-06-17 11:36:25 AM  
[image from filmwise.com too old to be available]
 
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