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(some girl)   Infamous Wheaton truck stalks students en route to Cincinnati   ( divider line
    More: Wheaton  
•       •       •

8722 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Apr 2002 at 8:33 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

121 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-04-03 08:35:42 PM  
wow, didn't know he was that desperate for work!
2002-04-03 08:35:50 PM  
Did you guys here about Donald Little?
2002-04-03 08:36:22 PM  
Wheaton stalking?.... shocking.
2002-04-03 08:36:27 PM  
Damn, I was gonna send this in.... not the story itself, but I saw a Wheaton truck, too. *shrug*
2002-04-03 08:37:23 PM  
wil's been holding out on us.. he has a lucrative insane trucking business on the side... screw this acting crap
2002-04-03 08:38:05 PM  
To many Cincinnati stories in the news of late. Being from Cincinnati, this kinda scares me...for some reason.
2002-04-03 08:39:02 PM  
I like the part about the tracking beacon:

"I'm sure he had a tracking beacon on us, because he was following us (or coming out of nowhere ahead of us) for at least five hours."

You can pick those up at any local stalker supply store.
2002-04-03 08:39:23 PM  
haha! check out the guy in the chair looking at the girl's boobies.. "sweet"...

and why is that other guy in the cemetery?
2002-04-03 08:39:27 PM  
Hmm... so Wil has now gone into the shipping business?
2002-04-03 08:42:09 PM  
Haha...check out some of the other pics in the directory. Delete the Wheaton.html and click on them...some are rather amusing.
2002-04-03 08:44:28 PM  
some of you lads will like the kinky damsel in distress wear...
2002-04-03 08:44:39 PM  
One word for this post: LAME.
2002-04-03 08:45:04 PM  
Poor Wheaton... you have to resort to trucking...

i guess that job at parmount was an april fools joke...
2002-04-03 08:45:17 PM  
I'm sure he had a tracking beacon on us, because he was following us (or coming out of nowhere ahead of us) for at least five hours.

Could it be that since they were on an interstate this truck was perhaps headed from one city to another?
2002-04-03 08:46:49 PM  
Uh. Someone sees a truck with the word "Wheaton" on it and it gets linked? That is retarded. Seriously, seriously retarded.

Hey, I saw a truck that said "God" on it the other day! I guess that means God is stalking ME! Yuck yuck yuck! Better send that one off to Fark!
2002-04-03 08:48:09 PM  
And yes, it was the same guy. I'm sure he had a tracking beacon on us

prolly cause you were so hot he had to run your ass off the road? not prolly cause you were PISSIN him off and got in his way dumb biatch
2002-04-03 08:49:34 PM  
Look I warped to the future and wrote

04-04-02 08:34:55 AM Casper
Boobies Please.

Now I'm back!
2002-04-03 08:57:59 PM  
Yup! That driver had nothing better to do than follow you through the country. How do we know you weren't stalking him? Psycho stalkbiatch.
2002-04-03 09:00:51 PM  
Well, it's pretty obvious now that the moderators have left the building. How'd the hell this ever get posted?
2002-04-03 09:06:04 PM  
2002-04-03 09:20:39 PM  
MST3K Crow, moderators don't pick links.
Read the Farq
2002-04-03 09:20:52 PM  
You know, I think Wil should start bugging Spielberg to produce a sequel to his tv movie The Duelist, with Mr. Wheaton portraying the either the protagonist or antagonist. That'd be a tight little production, and I think our resident Trek refugee has the stones to carry it.

You guys should see that movie, if you can. Considering it's from the late 70s/early 80s, and is a TV movie, it rocks!

Okay, I'm bored with this joke now. Though Wil should still bug big-name Hollywood directors for roles. It did work for Mr. T...
2002-04-03 09:21:36 PM  
It got posted because it's fark. If you don't like the posts, then try and post something better.

It's not news, it's fark.

good post.
2002-04-03 09:24:38 PM  
I for one think that's pretty funny, and I'm willing to voice that opinion publicly. It reminds me of the time I was driving on the interstate and saw a big white billboard that said Prepare to Meet Thy God right before narrowly avoiding a serious accident. I don't know why exactly, but again I feel the need to share.
2002-04-03 09:27:14 PM  
I'm sure those trucks are being used to cart the tons of movie and TV scripts to Wil that he receives daily from hopeful directors and producers.


Oh, sorry. That must have been Evil Wirthling speaking again.
wil [TotalFark]
2002-04-03 09:28:01 PM  
Yes, that's right.

I have been following this girl for quite some time now. This photo was taken shortly before I grabbed the man she is with, and ate his brains.

Although she is currently protected by this surly, rag tag band of misfits, she is no match for me, and my fleet of super trucks! They think they are clever, and, though they possess many weapons, I will defeat them all!

Let this be a warning to all of you. Space Nerd Wil Wheaton will not be denied!
wil [TotalFark]
2002-04-03 09:29:59 PM  
Arrgh. Stupid HTML. I now add HTML to The List of "those who will tase my wrath!"

Cut and paste accordingly:

I have been following this girl for quite some time now. This photo was taken shortly before I grabbed the man she is with, and ate his brains.
2002-04-03 09:30:29 PM  
Congratulations on Enterprise, Wil. Can I borrow one of your trucks?
2002-04-03 09:35:46 PM  
They named a whole town after your lame ass out here in the Western Burbs of Chicago.

Quit following me, you sicko.
2002-04-03 09:36:09 PM  
You mean that enterprise thing wasn't a joke? I'm so confused.
2002-04-03 09:38:45 PM  
Get em Wil. And when you catch them.... buckwheats for all of em.
2002-04-03 09:38:47 PM  
This is sort of like when college kids would try to cram as many people as they could into a Volkswagen Beetle or a phonebooth. Only now instead of college kids it's sad, lonely Farkers and instead of Beetles or phonebooths it's Wil Wheaton's nuts.

Lame lame lame lame lame.

Oh, and lame.
2002-04-03 09:41:16 PM  
lol IckyMettle! Even though I'm probably one of the Farkers you're making fun of, that's easilly the funniest thing I've read all day!
2002-04-03 09:41:28 PM  
I still wanna know why this guy thinks it's cool to hang out in a cemetery...
2002-04-03 09:42:06 PM  
Crotchrocket Slim:

That movie you speak of is titled "Duel". It was released in 1971. Cool psycho-thriller flick.
wil [TotalFark]
2002-04-03 09:42:19 PM  
Hey, leave my nuts out of this.

You're next, IckyMettle. The trucks leave at dawn.
2002-04-03 09:43:13 PM  
Heck Wil, she is kind of pretty but watch out she has a belt.

img src=" ">
2002-04-03 09:44:02 PM  
Freakfoundation: that's it (been forever since I saw it). Thanks man, I needed the clarification. Again, go see it guys, one of Spielberg's earlier, better works.
2002-04-03 09:44:11 PM  
Its not Wil, its evil Wesley, the time traveling tyrant

[image from too old to be available]

And Wil it looks like you had your girl's date pretty scared, nice stalking.
2002-04-03 09:48:20 PM  
I better watch out, screwin up on a thread about wil may get me run over. Sorry about the html f'up.
2002-04-03 09:50:19 PM  
You go, Voodoo Trucker! That's a big 10-4 on that. Over and out.
2002-04-03 09:53:01 PM  
Dang, the Traveller sure takes Wesley to the most interesting places. I wonder what their number is.
2002-04-03 09:59:38 PM  
Great. Now we have truck nerds.
2002-04-03 10:03:40 PM  
Oh yes, yet another quality post from those crazy guys in Kentuck*DELETED!!*
2002-04-03 10:08:52 PM  
Considering this is fark, the post is appropos. I really need to get a Class A and see if that company is hiring more truckers.
2002-04-03 10:10:53 PM  
She plays 3 kingdoms MUD & is a knight, we should all go in & protect her from any evil Wheaton mobs that should appear.
I was a Necro Vamp for a while in that game & now I remember that if you wore the swedish chef's hat you would speak "sveedish" just like you could here on april 1.
I'm curious, are there any other former/current 3k denizens, me? I was Halpas.
2002-04-03 10:14:36 PM  
Wil Wheaton stabbed me in the neck with a pencil.
2002-04-03 10:16:27 PM  
You know someone has been blogging too long when they link every other friggin' word in a post.
2002-04-03 10:17:03 PM  
She should have broken some crates and found the power up and gone Yablonski on that truck.
2002-04-03 10:22:21 PM  
What level is a "Summon Domo-Kun" spell?
2002-04-03 10:29:40 PM  
This reminds me of the incredibly stupid movie Joy Ride. Even though I saw it at a free press preview, I'm still waiting for my refund on that one.

And Wil, you've got to learn to be a little more subtle. A truck like that seems pretty hard to hide, and I'll bet you can't silently roll past her house at night without waking her up. I'd suggest a nice Ford Contour or Honda Civic, they're relatively quiet cars, ideal for stalking. But, if a semi truck is your style, that's cool, whatever works.
2002-04-03 10:30:16 PM  
I can't believe Wil Wheaton actually posts on Fark. Wow.

(insert "you're a farking Star Trek nerd with no life" comments now)
2002-04-03 10:34:08 PM  
An outfit named "Crusher Freight" probably wouldn't get much business. And "CF" is already taken. Although everyone calls them "Crushed Freight" anyway.
2002-04-03 10:36:58 PM  
I can't believe Wil Wheaton actually posts on Fark.

I love the Internet. Where else can one flame celebrities in real time and in person while supposedly at work? Thank you, Internet.
2002-04-03 10:37:42 PM  
2002-04-03 10:38:38 PM  
Wow! Wil Wheaton stabbed me in the neck with a pencil also. It was one of those big 1st grader type pencils. How big was the pencil he used on you, Jbay?
2002-04-03 10:39:29 PM  
I think it is cool as hell Wheaton posts on fark.........

I just saw that STNG episode in which Wil hooks up with a really cute chick......but she turns out to be a big hairy monster that can change shapes.......

If you happen to read this Wheaton, did you ever beam her up?
2002-04-03 10:40:42 PM  

Ha! Good catch there. Shoulda put quotes around "celebrities," eh?
2002-04-03 10:40:50 PM  
I too was initially taken back by Wils presence here.

I can only conclude it is a Barkley-like deal where Wil's IQ has gone through the roof, and he has wired himself into a console.
2002-04-03 10:42:28 PM  
Gay Gay Gay! Need more Pshops!
[image from too old to be available]
2002-04-03 10:44:35 PM  
poor wil wheaton, he's the most hated non celebrity on the internet
2002-04-03 10:44:53 PM  
(BTW, Wil, in case you're reading this, I only poke fun because you seem to have a good sense of humor. Well, that and because I have no life and so therefore justify my ego by cutting down those who do have a life, of course.)
2002-04-03 10:47:35 PM  
That picture. I am scarred for life.
I mean, more scarred.
2002-04-03 10:51:55 PM  
Speaking of really cute Star Trek chicks:
[image from too old to be available]
2002-04-03 10:52:40 PM  
Hey, Scraping Fetus, I have read the FARQ. But SOMEONE has to decide which link gets posted and which doesn't,or otherwise every link would be up here. It just seems to me that this one is particularly pointless. Someone found a picture of a truck with Wheaton on it, slappped a 'Wheaton' tag on it, and blam! it got posted. Should I try to find (or photoshop) an ad or article about walkers, change it to walkens, and put a 'Walken' tag on it? What would be the point?
2002-04-03 10:55:34 PM  
Wil Wheaton fondled my penis, but I am not supposed to say anything.
2002-04-03 11:00:31 PM  
Be grateful they weren't terrorized by a Weinerschnitzel hot dog car.
2002-04-03 11:01:08 PM  
What do you psychos do, scour the net looking for any instance of the word "wheaton"? Sad. Really sad.

I'm gonna put "Wheaton" in the title tag of all my web pages...
2002-04-03 11:10:54 PM  
Speaking of "Wheaton" s...
Next time you go pump gas, look at the labelling on the
gas pumps. On the Super America/Starvin' Marvin stations (at least) there is some reference to percentage of Wheaton in the fuel (or something like that).
2002-04-03 11:15:44 PM  
Candycain ...
2002-04-03 11:20:07 PM  

Did you read the FArQ before or after the suggestion?

I'm not trying to be an ass (well, maybe a little), but as soon as you learn SQL and spend a few years of your life trying to make others happy with a site you design, drop me a line...

Drew, Mike, and, yes, even Jeff...bust their asses every day so that the people here can have fun. If you don't like the links (even when they seem stupid to you), join the club, but don't rag the admins, the submitter did a great job naming it, and consequently, it got on.

PS: I loved Crow :)
2002-04-03 11:28:57 PM  
Title is everything
2002-04-03 11:31:05 PM  
Wil Wheaton must spend even more time online as I do. I guess that's because we both share a common trait.. unemployment. His daily blog is pretty damn long and he still has time to post on here too. I mean this truck story was only up for a few minutes before he posted a reply. I wonder if his wife gets fed up with him spending all his time at the computer. I guess his little website and Fark keep his mind off how sad and depressing his life truly has become.
wil [TotalFark]
2002-04-03 11:33:11 PM  
Hamoki: You have been added to the list.

Please pay no attention to the semi truck which will be parking in front of your mother's house, headlights trained on your lavish basement apartment, between 2 and 6 tomorrow.
2002-04-03 11:36:59 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-04-03 11:45:45 PM  
That was amusing.
2002-04-03 11:58:58 PM  
Jeebus Wil, can you chill out with all the retribution, man? That is so like, not cool.
2002-04-04 12:00:43 AM  
Yhippa: You suck!!!
2002-04-04 12:04:34 AM  
Just so you know, this is coming from a former Trek-head, that doesn't harbor resentment for Wesley Crusher:
[image from too old to be available]

Times Wil got to lip-wrestle with Ashley Judd: how many takes of that scene did you do?

Times Crotchrocket Slim got to lip-wrestle with Ashley Judd: 0

Though she's on Leno now, and she just said she got married on the same day as my last birthday. Wheeeeeeee!!!!!!
2002-04-04 12:07:34 AM  
Ah, yes, you are correct, actually do suck.

At any rate, I would assume that having trucks running you off the road is not cool. I-95 is a biatch when you're surrounded by sleepy truck drivers ready to knock your ass off the road.

Speaking of cars...
2002-04-04 12:10:19 AM  
I want to know how many takes the scene took on Stand by Me where the leech eats Wil's pecker. Look at the sacrifices he has made! He gave his weiner to save us all!!!
2002-04-04 12:21:16 AM  
You guys will never believe this... But there's a Wheaton trailor not more than a mile away from where I live in Castleton, Indiana... which is technically Indianapolis... it's been there for months...
2002-04-04 12:24:39 AM  
Yhippa: LOL! Now you know how Wil's felt the past few years when people write him off because of small statements that have nothing to do with how he is...

PS: I passed. jk ;)
2002-04-04 12:30:00 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Infamous Wheaton civil war soldier stalks rebel troops in route to Cincinnati
2002-04-04 12:33:19 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Infamous Wheaton college teaches students about Cincinnati
2002-04-04 12:38:12 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Infamous Wheaton terrier devours students in downtown Cincinnati"
2002-04-04 12:38:24 AM  
2002-04-04 12:49:23 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Why Wil? WHY???
2002-04-04 12:52:45 AM  
...and in other news, a drunken farker says he was stalked by the moon.
2002-04-04 12:54:46 AM  
slowly squeezing out what little life is left in this thread...
2002-04-04 12:56:44 AM  
CS: Great PS on the fly...
2002-04-04 12:59:45 AM  
Thank you Malinois, I had a quick moment of inspirato. Too bad Wil seems to have signed off for the night, I wanted to get onto his blacklist...
2002-04-04 01:02:09 AM  
Crotchrocket: Thanks for the many insightful and often amusing posts you've done over the weekend.
2002-04-04 01:26:37 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

You too can be saved by The Wheaton
2002-04-04 01:29:39 AM  
I have four cookies.
2002-04-04 01:29:43 AM  
Why are we bringing up Duel when it's all about Killdozer?
2002-04-04 01:29:54 AM  
"Hamoki: You have been added to the list.
Please pay no attention to the semi truck which will be parking in front of your mother's house, headlights trained on your lavish basement apartment, between 2 and 6 tomorrow." -Space Nerd Wil Wheaton

Actually I live upstairs in my mother's house.. but I digress. I just made a new and very disturbing discovery... Wil Wheaton's new hard core gay porn site!!!
I'm glad you've finally found your true calling in life Willy boy. Anyway, for the rest of you check out
and see for yourself.
2002-04-04 01:31:58 AM  
Hamoki, you're definitely on the list now. but I am ROTFLMFAO. Sorry Wil, but it is pretty funny.
2002-04-04 01:41:48 AM  
Be nice to Wil, not all of us have had the pleasuer of being on tv (well i have, but i know others have not), so he is a celebrity... and i think Wil should get an award... just for bring most popular out-of-spotlight(sorry wil) celeb on the net...

I still heart Wil Wheaton... I still vote Wil Wheaton for FHM magazines 100 sexiest woman of 2001.... at least 10 votes a week...
wil [TotalFark]
2002-04-04 01:46:09 AM  

I know when I am beat.

I will call off the trucks that were heading to Hamoki's house, and send them to a temporary holding facility, near our secret underground base, which is cleverly disgused as a college.

Don't bother looking, you'll never find it.

You may have taken this round, Hamoki, but the war will be mine!


2002-04-04 01:47:09 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Those sneaky Canadians!

BTW Admiraljustin...
Most of us (AOL keyword: most) are just giving Wil a hard time. I know I am. I bear no personal grudges against him for Star Trek and in fact, LOVED Stand By Me. Wil seems to be cool with all the ragging he gets because he still hangs around with us dweebs.
S'all Good!
2002-04-04 01:49:49 AM  
I'd swear that said Toronto. Oh well.
2002-04-04 01:53:07 AM  
Bring it on Wesley! You can send all of Star Fleet after me and I'll still beat your biatch ass into the ground every time. I look forward to our next battle.
2002-04-04 01:55:12 AM  
That's okay Mrdark. I'm from Toronto and I'm harassing Wil, so your rant is still meaningful.
2002-04-04 02:07:55 AM  
That's a strange coincidence. Now I feel as if my posts were part of some larger plan in the universe... one that we don't understand... one where random events all form a perfect pattern and everything happens for a reason.
Yeah, Wow. I'm gonna go look that up on Cosmiverse!
2002-04-04 02:08:50 AM  
That's okay Hamoki. Now yo' kin tell all yer friends at To'onto Junio' High how yo' flamed Wil Wheaton, as enny fool kin plainly see. Loser.
2002-04-04 02:17:24 AM  
I really don't need to 'flame' Wil since he is already a flaming homosexual. Just see for yourself by clicking here .
2002-04-04 02:32:48 AM  
Hamoki, funny the first time, now you're being an attention hog. I give you two choices, post that link on every thread on the mainpage, or shut the fark up. Once was funny, twice was lame.
2002-04-04 02:46:08 AM  
What is three times then?
2002-04-04 02:49:46 AM  
You may have a point there, but if you part your hair different, no one would see.
2002-04-04 02:50:12 AM  
Janet's hair looks much better from the back!
2002-04-04 02:54:21 AM  
In Fark terms, three times would normally mean that you are only slightly more literate than a disease ridden penis.

At least, that's what I heard.
2002-04-04 03:08:02 AM  
I don't even know where to begin with this one.
You know what.. I won't even bother.
BTW, here's link number four .
2002-04-04 03:08:02 AM  
I don't even know where to begin with this one.
You know what.. I won't even bother.
BTW, here's link number four .
2002-04-04 03:10:40 AM  
Oops. Clicked on 'add comment' twice. Guess that will make this number 6.
2002-04-04 05:18:37 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
Maybe, just maybe he was delivering something in the same direction?

Sheesj what a
img.fark.netView Full Size
2002-04-04 06:13:12 AM  
Is it just me or does everyone this chick knows sorta geeky looking?
2002-04-04 07:21:09 AM  
2002-04-04 07:49:23 AM  
thanks, Wil
2002-04-04 03:39:32 PM  
I guess Farkistan breeds a lot of "hot" Star Trek chicks. Ashely Judd and 7of9 are both from Kentucky. It seems strange to use the word "hot" in the same sentence as "Star Trek," since I'm fairly sure that people get progressively uglier with every viewing.
2002-04-04 06:14:05 PM  
Hey, Malinois, when I want your opinion I'll beat it out of you! :)
And I like German Shepherds better....

Yes, you were a bit of an ass, but I think you and Scraping were over-reacting just a tad to my comment. I just thought that the link wasn't deserving of the usual high quality of intertaining news that you normally find on Fark. And, really, the headline wasn't all *that* funny.....

Or maybe it's just me.....

Hey, until Ashcroft takes over, it's still a free country! I can post my insignificant comments just like everyone else!

Now I need to get back to work.....
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