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(Lancaster Online)   Having solved all other problems in Germantown, Tennessee, city council to regulate when garage doors may be opened   (lancasteronline.com) divider line 106
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11287 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 May 2005 at 1:49 PM (9 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-05-18 02:36:57 PM  
This is the same place that prevented Apple from putting a sign up in front of their new retail store because there's an ordinance against food products on signage.
 
2005-05-18 02:37:03 PM  
I bow hunt deer in my upscale sub division. The neighbors don't mind because the forest rats have been eating up their nice landscaping. I do make sure to keep the garage door closed while skinning and butchering.
 
2005-05-18 02:41:14 PM  
Lord Nimon
I knew one guy, for instance, who had to mow his and his neighbor's grass for months before anyone would buy it, because his neighbor didn't care about his lawn at all.

the guy across from me didn't mow his lawn for months so I called the township health inspector and they told him to cut it or get fined heavily

postwood
We have a subdivision here which won't allow you to park a car that's over 10 years old in your driveway unless you can certify that it is a valuable antique auto.

I heard about a town who hassled a guy for parking his dualie pickup in his driveway even though it wasn't a commercial vehicle, he used it to tow his boat
 
2005-05-18 03:02:44 PM  
While I recognize the fact that the article does not refer to an HOA, I'd still like to refute some posts which state that an HOA must be disclosed prior to purchasing a home.

My husband and I purchased a home in an upcoming, being-built neighborhood. The sales rep assured us of several things regarding the HOA rules, but would NOT supply a copy of the CCRs. So come time to close on the house, we finally get the CCRs. Any of you all going to take the time during a closing to read the one and a half inch stack of paper so you can be sure you agree with all of their rules???

Needless to say, the sales rep lied to us, and now we're stuck with a set of rules we don't like having to live by.
 
2005-05-18 03:03:13 PM  
they say that americans have too much balls for their own good, that their cocky and assholes.

well, why don't americans start vigilante groups against hoa's? start assasinating these farktards in their sleep 'till someone get's the farking message.
 
2005-05-18 03:07:03 PM  
stejm

Sadly, no. That woulda been a helluva show though. When was it? I discovered the Antenna in junior high (late 80's) and saw my first real punk shows there. Fugazi was the first band I ever saw there, and it was an absolutely fantastic show that I still consider one of the best live performances I've ever seen...right up there with Jawbreaker touring on the 'Unfun' set.

I miss the Antenna...and River City Donuts across the street. Nothing funnier than seeing a guy with a green mohawk and a milk mustache chatting with a 65+ year old bum.

Last I saw, the Antenna was a country bar by day, and more of a gay bar by night. That's an odd mix considering the place's history.

Midtown was the first area where I noticed that a guy walking down the street in a dress didn't get a 2nd glance.

/I complimented the dude on his dress.
 
2005-05-18 03:12:38 PM  
CruJones

Downtown memphis is the only place I've ever had my car broken into. The exception to the rule, I know :-)

..and I was right, I never was able to replace all the tapes of obscure local bands. Hope the 'tard got good money at the pawn shop for those and my radar detector. I'm just glad he left the 500+ bucks worth of other stuff....and my checkbook.

/anybody got a copy of Works & Woodson?
 
2005-05-18 03:14:59 PM  
I live in Memphis and this is just another reason I'm glad I don't live in that rich-man's craphole of a city.

FYI: Germantown is a city that is attempting to pass new regulations on what homeowners can do. It's NOT a homeowner's assocation. They already have regulations dealing with types and sizes of signs that businesses can have.

Germantown is a place I avoid simply because of the speed traps. This justifies avoiding it even more.

The linked article leaves out a few details:
From here:
Proposed yard rules irk many (subscription required)
or just read the Google cache

"The opponents didn't like the requirements that garage doors be closed unless residents were coming and going or for short periods while doing maintenance. Others disliked the suggestion that trailers, recreational vehicles and boats should be parked behind the front line of the house. The proposal for home street-address numbers of uniform height also drew complaints. And many questioned the 6-inch limit on grass height, and the requirement that yard waste not be taken to the curb until the night before pickup."
 
2005-05-18 03:15:38 PM  
Devilbunee

What was the reason on your "ugly car" citation? This has gotta be good!
 
2005-05-18 03:17:19 PM  
I used to live in Germantown. These types of ordinances didn't stop the property values from going down, or make it suck any less.
 
2005-05-18 03:18:00 PM  
CruJones
I really hope downtown Memphis is the safest place to be, as I have tickets for the midnight showing of Star Wars at the Muvico in Peabody Place.
 
2005-05-18 03:18:01 PM  
So when will Germantown be changing its name to Alphaville?
 
2005-05-18 03:18:03 PM  
InnerMonkey

You. saw Jawbreaker. During the Unfun set.

I am insanely jealous. I mean, I did get to see the reunited Iggy Pop and the Stooges for $3 two summers ago, but I'd trade it for Jawbreaker in their prime.

Oh, and the post... um, I hate people. That pretty much sums it up. Don't you have anything better to do with your lives? Christ. I worked for a real estate appraisal firm for a summer (temping whore) and nowhere on the appraisal form did "having a neighbor who doesn't mow their lawn or keeps their garage door open" come up in the appraisal price, except in a general neighborhood section, which I think covered the square-mile area. If it's a HOA, that's their fault (even if your sales agent screwed you over with the short time to read the rules, I'd stay up all night reading every page to make sure I didn't get screwed; just like I make rental agents wait until I read every single clause in the form they're making me sign). If it's the city, well, hell, that's b.s.
 
2005-05-18 03:23:12 PM  
InnerMonkey

I went to the Antenna before it turned into the Midtown Flame (I think that's what it is now)...

Once upon a time it was a real cool place that pulled in some good bands. I also miss Red Square...and 616 from before the fire. That place was cool...then it went to crap. Saw an awesome show there once for $10: Prick followed by TKK with Lords of Acid as the headliner.

Hot chicks wearing hardly anything dancing to techno songs that were only about sex.

Best $10 I ever spent...
 
2005-05-18 03:29:23 PM  
00squirrel
I don't want someone telling me what I can and can't do with MY PROPERTY! If I want lovely pink flamingos in my yard, then by god, I don't want someone telling me I can't put them there!

When renting a townhouse with 3 other guys, we kept a brown, plastic trash can just outside the front door as there was no garage. It was always sealed tight and kept back up in a corner where it couldn't even be seen from most of the parking lot. After living there for over a year, we got a letter from the CA (a well-funded neighborhood association - the worst kind) telling us we had to move the trash can inside. (No one ever even approached us; the letter was the first we heard that anyone was even unhappy.) It was a major inconvenience to keep the thing inside the front door as the entry to the townhouse was on a split-level, and the can got in the way of the front door and stairs. Hauling it any further inside meant trucking it up or down half a flight of stairs.

There was no rule against lawn ornaments under a certain height, however, so in retaliation, we got one of those hideous flamingos (ours had the wings that spin when the wind blows, though) and planted it dead center in the middle of the yard where it was plainly visible and could definitely be enjoyed by the entire community.

And after planting it, I did in fact step back a la Fox Mulder as Mr. Petri and say "bring it on".
 
2005-05-18 03:30:25 PM  
Germantown, eh?

Don't mention the war!
 
2005-05-18 03:32:12 PM  
The problem is when you receive a copy of the HOA bylaws, and when you abide by them, but the HOA adds new stupid bylaws on top of that or refuses to let you get a perfectly good extention put on your house, for example.

gitsh01: In my neighborhood, any change to the bylaws requires a 70% approval of all the residents. People who abstain are counted as "no" votes. If you move into a neighborhood where a minority of people have the power to change rules, then you have no one else to blame but yourself.
 
2005-05-18 03:34:12 PM  
Devilbunee

Uhhh, I-10? Jacksonville, Fl. to near L.A. Pretty long don'tcha think?

I live in Jackson, MS. We have Madison, which is 8 miles north. Based on Germantown, TN. Businesses have to sell their souls to build there. The Subway shop looks like a mausoleum and the walmart looks like a museum. The interchange with I-55 cost 3 times the cost of a normal interchange, with red brick, specialty design, and landscape lighting shining from the ground into the underside of the bridge. All state tax payers paid for this BS. I wouldn't live there if they gave me a house.

as for HOAs....
I also know of a neighborhood that requires each home built to have a full Viking kitchen. How the hell does that effect anyone else's property values??? BS.
 
2005-05-18 03:34:19 PM  
Schwarzenbach had a nasty throat condition making his voice even more harsh than Unfun already sounded. You could see that it really hurt to sing, and they still did a really really long set. Later albums sound funny without that raspy voice.

That Jawbreaker show shall forever be the best live show I see. Better than The Dead Milkmen, GG Allin, Pezz, Screaching Weasel and all the other wonderful shows at the Antenna alone. Actually, GG Allin was nasty, lets just forget he ever "was" in the first place. The Antenna was Mecca for me in my youth. Growing up in small-town Mississippi, that was the closest and at the time, only place I knew to go for my taste in music. I found the "616" and the New Daisy later, but still miss the dirty grungy Antenna where you didn't breath if you went to the bathroom.
 
2005-05-18 03:34:21 PM  
Trailer Parks have HOAs?

;)

- R
 
2005-05-18 03:41:08 PM  
Somebody help me out here. I've never lived in an area subject to the policies of a HOA.

From what authority do they derive their power? Furthermore, what is stopping a homeowner from ignoring the associations bylaws? Is this bullshiat written into the deed? Are they going to do take your house away?

These stories are a utilitarianist's nightmare. Bentham and Mill must be rolling over in their graves.
 
2005-05-18 03:43:33 PM  
Here we go. It was one of these:

 
2005-05-18 03:51:22 PM  
ritametremaid:

Germantown, eh?
Don't mention the war!


I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it.
 
2005-05-18 03:52:22 PM  
I don't know what law gives HOAs the authority that they have, but they do, in fact, have it. Houston has been abuzz for many a year about people actually losing their homes due to things like nonpayment of HOA dues.

My husband and I call them the HOA Nazis.

I imagine there are plenty of places where the HOAs are benign, but all it takes is one power hungry board member, and all hell breaks loose.

There's a woman in my neighborhood whose husband died from cancer, leaving her with three young boys to raise. She's had to take two jobs to make the mortgage and obviously lacks the time to properly care for her property. The HOA is relentless in its hounding, showing no regard for her personal circumstances.
 
2005-05-18 03:58:50 PM  
Cogs:

From what authority do they derive their power? Furthermore, what is stopping a homeowner from ignoring the associations bylaws? Is this bullshiat written into the deed? Are they going to do take your house away?

They probably won't go so far as to take your house away, but lawsuits can an do happen where they get a judge to tell you to do what they say. Or in the case of, say, cutting the grass, the HOA can hire someone to do it, then bill the resident. Resident doesn't pay, the HOA sues.

The power comes from the fact that you agree to the HOA's rules when you buy the house. It's a condition of ownership. And since you can buy a house elsewhere, they can ask for some really unconstitutional things and get away with it.
 
2005-05-18 03:59:46 PM  
Like I said, Bentley Little's book, "The Association" is pretty creepy, fun in a macabre way, and eerily similar to what you are describing, eezelpreezel.
 
2005-05-18 04:05:01 PM  
jizzzler said:Our homeowners association started fined us this year because our trees didnt bloom at the "right time".

You gotta farkin be kiddin me.
Nice pic!
 
2005-05-18 04:07:31 PM  
HOAS Suck big long donley dickolas
 
2005-05-18 04:15:10 PM  
While I am normally against tacky decorating and poorly planned landscaping of any kind, I do believe that HOA enforcers and lawmakers such as this might deserve a little gift:

http://www.flockayard.com/

In my opinion, an $85 gesture of this nature is well worth it.
 
2005-05-18 04:23:59 PM  
Can one of the suburban people on here explain what the allure is among people in subdivisions for opening their garage doors and leaving them open? I once spent 3 years living in a suburb, in a subdivision. (And hated it.) Most of my neighbors would open their garage doors as soon as they got home and not close them until they went to bed... even if they were never in their garage. They'd do this on weekends too all day. Sometimes they'd forget and leave them open overnight and then be shocked when someone ran off with their lawnmower. I just don't get it. Is it some wort of weird suburban status thing? Is it a beige McMansion mating display? Clue me in.
 
2005-05-18 04:25:39 PM  
Before the flamewar gets started about TN being "Red State", Memphis suburbs are "Blue Counties" so damn farking hippy liberals.
 
2005-05-18 04:27:54 PM  
laurascudder

"I used to live in Germantown. These types of ordinances didn't stop the property values from going down, or make it suck any less"

It's a stupid ordinance which will not stand, but where are you talking about? No properties in Germantown, TN that I'm aware of are devaluing.

InnerMonkey

"I discovered the Antenna in junior high (late 80's) and saw my first real punk shows there"

Hey there used to be a website with a bunch of pictures from the Antenna club, I'll try and find it. I remember REM was there one night when they were recording Automatic for the people at Ardent. Do you remember a place called Decadence Manor?

"Last I saw, the Antenna was a country bar by day, and more of a gay bar by night."

It's a lesbian bar now. I think called the Madison Flame

"Midtown was the first area where I noticed that a guy walking down the street in a dress didn't get a 2nd glance."

Still is.

"No idea, might even be Germantown....or maybe Bartlett area (lotsa cops in Bartlett!)"

Dude, Bartlett is not Germantwon. Bartlett is more redneckish and Germantown is more snobish.

"Germantown is still a crappy unsafe place to live, just like the rest of Memphis."

Been like 1 murder there in the past decade, it fairly safe, but the Germantown Popo do border on Nazis.

"My wife is from Frazier"

Frasier is the armpit of Memphis. Does she have all her teeth? (kidding had to throw that in)

"misses the old school punk scene in Midtown"

Still there, it's just more underground.
 
2005-05-18 04:32:22 PM  
gregarious

I meant to say one of the longest, but since you want to be picky:

From answers.com

I-40 length 2,554.22 miles

I-10 length 2,460 miles
 
2005-05-18 04:32:50 PM  
I can appreciate the fact that you would want to preserve the property value. If you don't tend your garden or make it a dump, you could have rats and sundry rodents and roaches and stuff. Of course you don't want that.

This:

My husband and I purchased a home in an upcoming, being-built neighborhood. The sales rep assured us of several things regarding the HOA rules, but would NOT supply a copy of the CCRs. So come time to close on the house, we finally get the CCRs. Any of you all going to take the time during a closing to read the one and a half inch stack of paper so you can be sure you agree with all of their rules???

would earn a call to the guy with the following content: "the next thing I hear from you and I will hear it today, is the exact time, somewhere this week, when you will be bringing me the CCRs. Anything else that comes out of your mouth that is not a statement of time when I will be getting them, for whatever reason, means sayonara to your contract, your commission and the time you spent on this account.
Try and say something else to see if I'm kidding.

If you came to my house saying you didn't like me having my garage door open would probably result in the garage door being open even longer. A complaint about noise, especially at night time, of course. Someone else's noise is the most annoying thing to have to live with and I have plenty of experience with that :(.
But my garage door being open beyond racing in and out of the garage and some maintenance, ruins your precious property value?
fark that.

Or freak the neighbourhood out by performing any and all outdoors activities dressed in all-black, so as not to stand out. And leave the doors closed for 6 months at a time.

That people actually want to live like this... I wonder what all these douches are going to say when the caldera under Yellowstone pops. Imagine all the fines for having 10 metric tons of ashes on your lawn. We can't have that!
 
2005-05-18 04:34:02 PM  
While we're on the subject, anybody up for a Memphis Fark party?
 
2005-05-18 04:35:37 PM  
Actually, it makes perfect sense.

All those expensive houses are going to fall down the next time the New Madrid fault moves (just one of the more common >M6 quakes, not another big >M8 quake like happened a couple hundred years ago).

Those people will probably have to live in their garages, and a garage is structurally more sound with the door closed, thus the rule.
 
2005-05-18 04:35:56 PM  
Haha, my parents live in Germantown. This very much what I'd expect from their city government. I'm not gonna knock it cause it was a nice safe place to grow up as a kid, but 1) Germantown cops can be Nazis (especially if you're not white and drive something worth less than $15000 through town) and 2) Some parts of the area are starting to melt into the Winchester devaluation, so the outskirts are certainly seeing property values declining.

But as long as we're dickin' on Memphis suburbs, why doesn't anyone make fun of Collierville?
 
2005-05-18 04:37:11 PM  
MacBagwan
The reason was that it was an eyesore or some such. I managed a retail store there and the fact that my car was ugly was the whole reason I was pulled over. It was a '79 Cutlas Salon which was hideous to begin with, but it had been hit twice so was 3 colors cause it wasn't worth a paintjob. They actually told me that if I was caught in it in the city limits again they would impound it. They tried too. My store was just inside the city limits so I just parked accross the street. They tried to get me a couple times and I kept pointing out they were out of thier jurisdiction.
 
2005-05-18 04:38:08 PM  
00squirrel:

I'm I the only person in the world who would never live in a friggin sub division?


I don't get it! What are the advantages of living in a sub division? I don't want someone telling me what I can and can't do with MY PROPERTY! If I want lovely pink flamingos in my yard, then by god, I don't want someone telling me I can't put them there!

RTFA, it is not a subdivision, it is the entire city. Germantown will always come up with these lame proposals to control everything about the city. I am sure most Memphis residents have noticed that all Exxons in Memphis are damn ugly blue building, but the ones in Germantown are a very nice subdued color. You couldn't pay me to live in Germantown, although I did graduate from school there.

/rant over
 
2005-05-18 04:44:40 PM  
CruJones

Does 38103 include Harbor Town? Cause if so, that explains it - HT has richer folks living there than Germantown does! Not to mention the fact that 10 years ago I think that would be BS, there's no way downtown was safer than the 'burbs back then. I got jumped and got my car broken into twice down there... so I'll be happy to agree these days, but I dunno about '95 and before.

Since no one seems to care, I'll answer it anyway. 38103. Downtown. Least crime per capita, especially the residential areas. The South Bluffs and Mud Island areas are actually damn nice. Plus, on the island, I get to watch all the girls go running by the river in the afternoon.
 
2005-05-18 05:05:18 PM  
CruJones

"Does 38103 include Harbor Town? Cause if so, that explains it"

Yeah it does.

"HT has richer folks living there than Germantown does!"

Plus its basically an Island surround by Industrial area on one side and a bridge on the other. Cool ass houses on Island drive.

"10 years ago I think that would be BS"

10 years ago is your right, but with the downtown is almost a case study in revitzation. Its still heterogenouse though, and you don't want walk too far down certain streets outside of the touristy areas.

Count_Popeula


"While we're on the subject, anybody up for a Memphis Fark party?"

Sounds good to me.

SwiftFox

":All those expensive houses are going to fall down the next time the New Madrid fault moves"

Nah, wood structures are self dampending when it comes to earthquakes.

"I get to watch all the girls go running by the river in the afternoon"

That the best part on the Island.

jmh79

"This very much what I'd expect from their city government"

No kidding.
 
2005-05-18 05:06:46 PM  
"I don't know what law gives HOAs the authority that they have, but they do, in fact, have it. Houston has been abuzz for many a year about people actually losing their homes due to things like nonpayment of HOA dues."

The authority you give them when you buy a house and sign the contract.
 
2005-05-18 05:32:51 PM  
Rode my Buell through "Germantown" on my way to Memphis from Nashville last year to see Kitty play at the New Daisy Theater- farking cops trailed me all the way through the stinkin' place. At one point I had three patrol cars following right behind me for more than five miles. Goddamn fascists the lot of 'em.
 
2005-05-18 05:38:56 PM  
For those claiming the crime rate is Germantown is as bad as Memphis, think again. According to the Feds, the Memphis crime rate is approximately double the national average.

Collierville and Germantown, the two Memphis suburbs most picked on as uppity snotty suburbs, are about half the national average - or a quarter of the crime rate in Memphis.

As for the ever present subject of HOA's , which really have nothing to do with this story, I have a few comments for what it is worth.

First, I like HOA's as a general rule. It took me over a year to sell my last house because of the guy across the street with two licensed drivers, 3 garage bays, and 13 cars - none of which were in the garage. I don't have that problem now that I live under a HOA.

I live in the Memphis suburb Collierville, in a neighborhood with an active HOA. The town requires HOA's for all new neighborhoods. My appreciation has exceeded the local and national averages since creation - heavily because the HOA does a good job of keeping the neighborhood kept up and clean. The problem is when you lose balance and the HOA becomes the obligiatory Nazi reference. But luckily, that is why the bylaws have processes in stone for kicking out bad board members.

HOA's are good - if they work with the will of the people living in the neighborhood. Get involved and let your voice be heard to the board, and make sure it is active. Don't let a few bad apples run the system. Kick them out if need be, and get involved. Don't biatch about your HOA unless you are actively involved, voting, reading announcements, attending meetings, reviewing budget statements, and otherwise holding the board accountable.

And if your neighborhood really no longer wants the HOA, vote it out of existence. It is possible to amend the bylaws and recorded covenants in almost all cases with enough votes from the homeowners.

Just my two cents.
 
2005-05-18 05:42:09 PM  
dotsandlines - The Apple store has a rather large and attractive apple outside it. The city government modified the law when that situation came up.
 
2005-05-18 05:59:50 PM  
j__z:

Do you remember a place called Decadence Manor?

If it's the place I'm thinking of, some friends and I played their after being booked at the Antenna and getting dropped when a popular local band was able to play their instead. It was the Simpletones, so I didn't mind so much, as I was still able to catch them play after we got done.

Dude, Bartlett is not Germantwon. Bartlett is more redneckish and Germantown is more snobish.

I've never liked the attitude I picked up on in Bartlett, and I know it isn't Germantown. I just thought that maybe with all the police activity I've seen there, it was one of the safer areas. I only ever knew one person in Bartlett, and it wasn't worth going all the way there to visit :)

Been like 1 murder there in the past decade, it fairly safe, but the Germantown Popo do border on Nazis.

My murder comment was a Memphis in general comment, but mostly directed toward that area of Chelsea (sp?) and Frasier.


"My wife is from Frazier"

Frasier is the armpit of Memphis. Does she have all her teeth? (kidding had to throw that in)


Yep! She's an exception to the rule of what comes out of Frasier. Her family had owned property there for two generations, and there was a time when it was a better place (I've seen pics!). We DON'T go there. Her parents moved out years ago, and that's the last we ever saw of it. I think the only reason she survived was that her parents sent her to private school, and as soon as she graduated from there, followed me to college and greener pastures.

"misses the old school punk scene in Midtown"
Still there, it's just more underground.


Glad to hear that. I don't live close anymore, but it's good to know fun memories of Midtown (Shangri-La records and good shows for cheap)live on. Although last time I was at Shangri-La (years ago) it had gone more mainstream alternative (is that a real genre) that I cared for.
 
2005-05-18 06:03:41 PM  
Tulkas: Rode my Buell through "Germantown"


Torque! I visited a Buel Demo Days even recently, and enjoyed most of what I rode. Didn't like the folded up feeling of the sportier series (R series?) but other wise they were fun.
 
2005-05-18 06:17:35 PM  
Memphis farkers:

Is Prince Mongo still around? Anyone remember Six Flags over Frazier?

I'm listening to the Tim McCarver show on ESPN right now, kind of weird
 
2005-05-18 06:28:10 PM  
Lived in Memphis for four years - 1998-2002. Worked out in Germantown, Collierville, Bartlet, etc., etc., etc.. I agree with InnerMonkey - the whole farking area sucks.

The few friends I have there are the only reason to go back.

That and to have a Huey's burger in midtown.

If you're a tourist? Avoid the place like the plague. There's nothing there worth visiting. It's like a dirty version of Buffalo.
 
2005-05-18 07:20:16 PM  
"It's like a dirty version of Buffalo"

Funny, I got friends who say the same thing about Jersey.

Anyway if you want to know what G-town code and surrounding area looks like here some pics.

http://photobucket.com/albums/y204/j__z/
 
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