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(Biography Channel)   For the morbidly, historically, and romantically inclined, a dating match program that helps find your "dead celebrity soulmate"   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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19977 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Apr 2005 at 12:00 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

93 Comments     (+0 »)

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2005-04-03 01:59:26 AM  
Great. I get Vincent Van Gogh or Edgar Allen Poe.

What does that say about me? (other than I can't spell?)
2005-04-03 03:14:34 AM  
I got Mata Hari, a spy and exotic dancer. Her picture is quite nice.
2005-04-03 03:46:05 AM  
I got those same ones Sarty
2005-04-03 07:01:55 AM  
Genghis Khan responds...
"Your offering of twelve Yak carcasses shows me honor and respect, and for that I have chosen to spare you. You are officially a Mongol from this day forward!"

What your date might be like...
Despite his fearsome and well-deserved reputation as a ruthless military genius, Khan can be quite charming. The two of you can discuss art and the role of writers in advanced society, and then you can go out for a coffee and make plans to invade China. If you want something more romantic, you might take him to see a movie of "Robin Hood," although Khan might find it annoying that Robin Hood doesn't massacre everyone in the party he's robbing. If you want a lasting relationship with Khan, be prepared to travel a lot, usually on horseback.
2005-04-03 10:13:59 AM  
Frida Kahlo responds...
"Hola! So, you think you have the frijoles to be an el Frido? It takes energy, my friend, and passion. But go ahead, take your best shot."
What your date might be like...
Expect lots of drinking, smoking, and arguing. You'll enjoy yourself more if you can hold your liquor and hold forth with strong opinions about art. There are some areas that interest Ms. Kahlo more than others, so you might want to brush up on your knowledge of socialism, indigenous Mexican cultures, and the various schools of 20th century painting before meeting up with her.
2005-04-03 12:08:12 PM  
I've never farked a dead girl, but I had this asian whore once...
2005-04-03 12:08:38 PM  
i got Pope John Paul II.
2005-04-03 12:10:24 PM  
I got Henry VIII, Van Gogh, and Da Vinci. A fat bastard, a moody bastard, and a genius. I think I'm gonna go with #3.
2005-04-03 12:10:25 PM  
Annie Oakley?

Well...I guess I'll have to hit it then...
2005-04-03 12:10:54 PM  
I also got Frida. Hmmm.....
2005-04-03 12:11:55 PM  
I got Edgar Alan Poe + P.T. Barnum. I'd rather hang out in a cemetery than swindle people, I guess, so I'm going for #1!
2005-04-03 12:15:51 PM  
I got some blogger named MonkeyLover. I suck
2005-04-03 12:16:46 PM  
ooooh, Susan B. Anthony
2005-04-03 12:16:57 PM  
Leonardo da Vinci responds . . .
"I really need to finish these sketches for my latest invention, and then start work on the mechanical lion statue that has been commissioned by the King, but your beauty and intelligence captivate me. Let us meet, and soon!"

What your date might be like . . .
If you've ever dated someone with ADD, you might have an idea of what to expect. Leonardo might suddenly disappear to work on an idea, or might change topics midstream as some concept or phrase triggers a new series of thoughts. Your best bet is to offer your assistance on whatever project he is involved in at the moment; then, at least you'll be able to talk a little, even if the conversation will mainly consist of being given a series of instructions by your overachieving master.

Someone, quick! Fetch me a shovel!
2005-04-03 12:17:40 PM  
I got Van Gough and Da Vinci. I didn't know either of them had a penchant for world domination.
2005-04-03 12:18:11 PM  
Agatha Christie? I can live with that.

...or will I?
2005-04-03 12:22:03 PM  
Cleopatra and I are going to take over the world. Are thinking what I am Pinky?
2005-04-03 12:22:31 PM  
Frida Kahlo always shocks me with her mingingness.

Mata Hari and Eva Peron though...
2005-04-03 12:28:30 PM  
I got GG Allin and Jessica Savitch's career.
2005-04-03 12:29:04 PM  
Edgar Allen Poe, Vincent van Gogh and James Baldwin. Oh, great -- a necrophiliac, a dude with bipolar disorder or schizophrenia depending on which historian you're reading, and a homosexual. I'm not dead, I'm not into drama, and I'm not a fag hag. This sucks.
2005-04-03 12:30:15 PM  
I am strangely attracted to Agatha Christie now.......
2005-04-03 12:34:33 PM  
majorhopper: Hey! That's no fair!

/jealous as shiat.
2005-04-03 12:35:09 PM  
Indira Gandhi responds...
"I'm declaring a state of emergency regarding your dating methods. In other words, no thanks."
Kicked to the curb by Indira Gandhi....I thought she would be bi-curious.
Chicks...what can you do?
2005-04-03 12:43:20 PM  
Edgar Allan Poe responds...
"Why, why, oh why must you haunt my waking nightmares with your presence? I shall go mad. Madness! It consumes me! I must give in and agree to see you, or else I shall never find peace."

I've always been a Poe fan, this is pretty cool.
2005-04-03 12:45:48 PM  
I got Scatman Crothers. How's that happen?
2005-04-03 12:46:19 PM  
I didn't think that James Baldwin would be the kind of guy who would want to hang out on an island drinking mai tais, but, if it's a choice between him and Edgar Allan Poe.....
2005-04-03 12:53:21 PM  
Mata Hari, Annie Oakley and Frida Kahlo. When the least worst option is a monobrowed Mexican lesbian, who married a gay man, you know you've got problems.
2005-04-03 12:53:22 PM  
Hmm...Annie Oakley.

Can't say I'd mind that.
2005-04-03 12:55:37 PM  
well, this is unexpected:

Billy the Kid (William H. Bonney) responds...
"Sure, I'll meet ya. Wait for me at the Copperhead Saloon-- get a room upstairs, open the window, and turn out the lights, and around ten o'clock I'll climb in and we'll have a talk. But don't make any sudden moves or try anything tricky."

What your date might be like...
You'll enjoy yourself more if you have a healthy disrespect of the law and you enjoy firearms. Billy is young and impulsive, and he gets by on sheer luck and the kindness of strangers as much as anything else, so be prepared to take care of yourself should you end up in a botched robbery or a shoot-out on a friend's ranch.
2005-04-03 12:56:09 PM  
I got Joan of Arc and Cleopatra.
2005-04-03 01:09:22 PM  
I got the guy who runs the lighthouse.
2005-04-03 01:16:11 PM  
I got blown off by Mata Hari.
Say what you will, this is pretty sweet for the sake of historical purposes.

/History major
//among other majors.
2005-04-03 01:19:01 PM  
Lucrezia Borgia wants to meet and shoot peasants with crossbows. Lucky me!
2005-04-03 01:22:58 PM  
Annie Oakley?!?!
Well, hey, at least she said yes...
2005-04-03 01:23:18 PM  
Whoo, Frida Kahlo all the way baby!
2005-04-03 01:26:56 PM  
What? I got Oscar Wilde.

"Woman! Dammit," I says.
It shoots back: "No... you want Oscar Wilde. fag."

...I guess this explains why I end up masturbating all day long whenever I use me Axe bodywash.
2005-04-03 01:34:13 PM  
Mata Hari.. nice! Always wanted to hook up with a hot spy chick, and somehow I don't think I'll ever meet Alias... ;)
2005-04-03 01:34:26 PM  
frida kahlo, eva peron, and mata hari...

people wonder why I am on zoloft?
2005-04-03 01:36:38 PM  
Sherman Helmsley?
2005-04-03 01:37:59 PM  
something tells me there isn't a very large selection of celebs to get. I really wanted audrey hepburn. *sobs*
2005-04-03 01:38:57 PM  
B-b-b-but Marisa Tomei isn't dead yet. And I'm saving myself for her...
2005-04-03 01:39:42 PM  
Somehow, and I don't quite know how I did this, I managed to get Burgess Meredith as "The Penguin" in the old "Batman" series.
"Awk, as soon as I have finished making a flimsy peace with the city of Gotham which I shall subsequently break for the theft of a gold umbrella which is on display at The Gotham Louvre or whatever other unrealistic junk is available, I shall take you, m'dear to a little aviary that I know where I shall feed you my favorite raw fish dishes. We'll sqwauk the night away and if you are lucky I may just show you my hitherto unseen 'vibrating' umbrella. Awk!"
I was unaware of The Penguin's historical validity before this quiz. I stand corrected.

2005-04-03 01:49:48 PM  
A guy who married his cousin, a man who cut off his own ear, and oh well... Blind dating must really suck. /glad I married without anyone's help.
2005-04-03 01:54:54 PM  
I got Pancho Villa and Edgar Allen Poe. I hooked Pancho by asking his advice on how to burn down my neighbor's house.
2005-04-03 02:16:01 PM  
I got Agatha Christie.
2005-04-03 02:17:34 PM  
I got Joan of Arc, Cleopatra and some ugly english queen.
2005-04-03 02:20:27 PM  
Cleopatra, Catherine the Great, and Joan of Arc.
2005-04-03 02:22:22 PM  
I got Frida Kahlo, Eva Braun, and Mati Kari. WOW!
2005-04-03 02:22:25 PM  
Annie Oakley!
2005-04-03 02:26:04 PM  
Edgar Allan Poe, Leonardo da Vinci, and James Baldwin.

I went for Poe, but then cheated on him with Baldwin. I'm such a coont.
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