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(eMediaWire)   For $50 an hour, true losers can hire "Certified Female Wingman" to help them get drinks thrown in face and laughed at in bars   (emediawire.com) divider line 130
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19375 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Mar 2005 at 2:26 PM (9 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



130 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2005-03-31 08:23:56 AM  
Chicks are horrible wingmen. It's called wingMAN for a reason. Chicks like having wingMEN b/c if a nasty loser comes up, the male friend acts as buffer, and if they're interested in a guy, the male friend can amazingly dissapear.

/know way too much about these scenarios
 
2005-03-31 08:30:52 AM  
IME the right woman can be an invaluable wingman - but you want to be damn sure you've got the right one. Its alot easier to get a workable wingman scenario with a male friend then a female friend IMO.
 
2005-03-31 08:31:04 AM  
wingMAN? Are they certified shemales?
 
2005-03-31 08:34:10 AM  
More often than not lately, I'm rather ashamed to be a part of the human race.
 
2005-03-31 08:38:59 AM  
I think that this may be a front for hookers.

Shemale hookers at that.
 
2005-03-31 08:39:33 AM  
I need to have my female friends around since most of them have better judgement/taste when it comes to these matters.
 
2005-03-31 08:40:42 AM  
They should do what I do. I get paid by various barowners to not patronize them because I scare the women. Let's just say that it can be lucrative when ladies night is coming and they triple the payment to have me stay away.
 
2005-03-31 08:40:45 AM  
I think that this may be a front for hookers.

ding ding ding ding
 
2005-03-31 09:08:46 AM  
I think I recall this being a fark story about a year ago, if not this business then one similar. I think it would be too easy just to pay your money to hook up with the wing-chick and to hell with striking out with someone in the club.
 
2005-03-31 10:38:05 AM  
Women naturally do this with other women all the time.

What? Claw each others eyes out?
 
2005-03-31 10:59:39 AM  
If you can't hold a decent conversation with a woman, won't a situation like this just help point out that fact much more quickly? How is this supposed to make you look good?

understimulated:
I need to have my female friends around since most of them have better judgement/taste when it comes to these matters.

The article sounds like this isn't the kind of advice they give, but if it is, I can't imagine that being good either. Women will change a thumbs up to a thumbs down about another woman based entirely on something like shoes.
 
2005-03-31 11:26:05 AM  
"Wingman?" What, are they going to charm women by singing "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling?"

/RIP Goose...
 
2005-03-31 01:27:11 PM  
lovelaura, I'm thinking about hitting the bars tonight. Will you come with me please? I'll explain why on the way.
 
2005-03-31 01:28:23 PM  
Wait. You're a dude. I forgot. I thought you were someone else. Never mind.

And um, sorry about grabbing your package.
 
2005-03-31 01:41:45 PM  
iollow:

The article sounds like this isn't the kind of advice they give, but if it is, I can't imagine that being good either. Women will change a thumbs up to a thumbs down about another woman based entirely on something like shoes.

I've turned sour on women for things as insignificant as shoes. I just tend to attract and be attracted to 'exciting' women (as in 'lunatics') so it helps to have some sort of screener to protect me from myself. Guys are usually no help due mostly to the horndog factor. Plus a "he's a nice guy" from a woman probably holds more weight than one from a dude.
 
2005-03-31 02:32:16 PM  
Chicks make the BEST wingmen. You just need to be seen with them. I live with a girl and a guy. The girl hooked me up on St. Patricks Day AND just last Friday. She's hooked up my other roommate a few times as well. There's no one else I want as my wingman. She's just the best.

I've had a female wingman in college too. They are hands down the best.
 
2005-03-31 02:32:32 PM  
CheekyMunky: pwn3d! :P j/k
 
2005-03-31 02:34:38 PM  
Why can't people just meet people without having to resort to crap like this? Wingmen in general, not this article per se... Why do we (guys) feel it's necessary to put up a front every time we go out and beat our chests at every opportunity to compete for the attention of a woman?
 
2005-03-31 02:35:57 PM  
Otis2222222

Why do we (guys) feel it's necessary to put up a front every time we go out and beat our chests at every opportunity to compete for the attention of a woman?

Because it works.
 
2005-03-31 02:37:20 PM  
Otis:

I know what you maen. Still, sadly, sometimes it's just tough competing with all of the other tools and douchebags that are out there. Then again, they probably have wingmen of their own.

Wingtools? Wingdouches?
 
2005-03-31 02:38:28 PM  
understimulated: I just tend to attract and be attracted to 'exciting' women (as in 'lunatics')...


So, you are attracted to 95% of all women?



/Runs for cover
 
2005-03-31 02:38:56 PM  
$50/ hour to go out and try to get laid?

that just doesn't sound right.
 
2005-03-31 02:39:14 PM  
A month ago, TORO magazine had an article about this business.

Interestingly enough, the author spent most of the time trying to attract and impress his hired female wingman rather than the hotties at the bar.
 
2005-03-31 02:39:37 PM  
Man, that's the LAST thing I'd want. I have too many female friends, and they've never done anything but get in the way. Along the same lines, women with male friends are confusing as well, because you never know if they're an item or not.

I guess it could help you win over those really petty, competitive, shallow women who are only into guys that are taken. But why the hell would I want to go home with one of them anyways? They're nuts.
 
2005-03-31 02:39:53 PM  
After being trained to never leave my wingman, if she helps me score, she has to come back with us for a 3-way. Can see where this could work out. Buzz.
 
2005-03-31 02:45:32 PM  
It's a sad state of affairs for this culture when something this insanely asinine is a viable technique used to pick up women.

Wingmen? What the fark is wrong with you metrosexuals?
 
2005-03-31 02:47:06 PM  

"the average man spends 560 per month in bars trying to pick up women"?


At least they could have made up a more believable statistic

 
2005-03-31 02:49:25 PM  
The Lady Wingman will approach a girl or group of girls and start a conversation. Women naturally do this with other women all the time.

No, we don't. Ever. We look at over at the little group of sluts and critize their hair, makeup and clothing. Unless they are ugly. Then we think they seem nice.
 
2005-03-31 02:49:38 PM  
Me and a girlfriend used to have the same taste in women. We'd swap off as wingman for each other as the need arose. Different situations demand different tactics, I say.
 
2005-03-31 02:50:22 PM  
50 bucks an hour!?!

How's this for a novel idea: Get out there and get a frikkin' life and make some frikkin' friends. LOSERS!
 
2005-03-31 02:50:32 PM  
Sometime I just would rather be by myself so I cant imagine how hiring a wingperson could help this at all. I mean, why would I pay this person to come over to my house if there was noone there but me? What would end up happening is that I would spend the whole time in my room and this woman would charge me fifty dollars to hang out and watch TV. I mean I like watching TV and that's a great gig if someone is going to pay you to do it, but I'm not Pepsi Cola so I can't really afford it.

At the end of the day, if I want someone to come over and watch my TV I just call my aunt. She lives a couple of blocks down the street. Her husband died three years ago and my mother says she hasn't been the same since. You can bet she doesn't charge me fifty dollars to watch my TV. And when she turns the volume up too loud I just have to politely ask her to turn it down and she does. We got into an argument once because it was a celebrity episode of Fear Factor, but since then we've come to an understanding. My apartment is small and the walls are thin.
 
2005-03-31 02:51:21 PM  
Hmm... Up until now, I was lead to believe that a wingman was a/the guy who took one for the team by occupying the cockblock girlfriend, so that his friend(s) can score.

/a subtle but important difference
 
2005-03-31 02:52:03 PM  
I could see that working... but why not just spend the Grant on booze, probably just as good a chance. Or skip the whole bar and throw in another 100 and get a cheap hooker for a half hour or so. Probably as good as anything you may pick up while drunk at a bar... unless you are in college ohh my goodness those girls.
 
2005-03-31 02:53:03 PM  
harmonyvybes

How's this for a novel idea: Get out there and get a frikkin' life and make some frikkin' friends. LOSERS!


That's EXACTLY the point! What's your problem?
 
2005-03-31 02:54:44 PM  
50$ to help you score....

500$ to garuntee it....


//just sayin!
 
2005-03-31 02:56:51 PM  
Hmm... Up until now, I was lead to believe that a wingman was a/the guy who took one for the team by occupying the cockblock girlfriend, so that his friend(s) can score.

No, that's the Grenade Jumper. A very important job as well. The Wingmans primary purpose is to start or keep a conversation going.

/Didn't RTFA
//50 bucks an hour?! Get a hooker.
 
2005-03-31 02:56:51 PM  
Ilyag: Bring a metrosexual ONLY if you want to avoid the ladies you want to get laid with. Now, if you want to swap cooking recipes...


Thread over. Fighting the Frizzies wins.
 
2005-03-31 02:56:56 PM  
My best friend is a woman, but she's a terrible wingwoman when we go out. She's always scamming on guys. Doesn't help me a bit. Need to work on her a bit about that.
 
2005-03-31 02:59:53 PM  
"the average man spends 560 per month in bars trying to pick up women"?

God damn, Well I guess if you are drinking crazy priced wine and mixed drinks on the west coast. I've spent $80-90 at a bar while out with friends on a friday, but that isn't every week and I wasn't picking up women. I'd say I drink $150 a month. Me and my liver think it is a fine investment.
 
2005-03-31 03:00:28 PM  
kevin5lynn
That's EXACTLY the point! What's your problem?

Not one problem. I think it's frikkin' ridiculous and sad (but sad in a point-and-laugh kinda way.)
 
2005-03-31 03:01:27 PM  
I always thought the wingman was the guy who would take the fat chick in the female group, thus freeing up her hot friends for the other guys in the wingman's group. Every group of chicks has a fat chick; you gotta be prepared for that and have the designated wingman divert them.
 
2005-03-31 03:01:36 PM  
 
2005-03-31 03:01:50 PM  
mishratron: 500$ to garuntee it....

If it costs you $500, you are obviously not comparison shopping. Or your wife is really pissed at you and wants some jewelry to get back on her good side.

Oh, wait...
 
2005-03-31 03:03:20 PM  
This is San Francisco. How many men are going out to bars looking for girls in that town? I think they are really beards for hire.
 
2005-03-31 03:03:47 PM  
Sign me up. /hates life
 
2005-03-31 03:04:27 PM  
I must be a true loser because this sounds like a good service.
 
2005-03-31 03:04:55 PM  
harmonyvybes

Not one problem. I think it's frikkin' ridiculous and sad


Well, by that token, classified ads are sad, date lines are sad, web dating sites are sad, dating agencies are sad...

Well, not everyone meets their wife/husband in high school/college and live happily ever after.
 
2005-03-31 03:15:02 PM  
kevin5lynn
Well, by that token, classified ads are sad, date lines are sad, web dating sites are sad, dating agencies are sad...

I agree. They are all sad businesses bent on raising the romantic expectations of their vulnerable clients who feel their happiness is defined by meeting that 'someone' of the opposite (or same) sex through calculated personality profiles.

...and are still ridiculous...
 
2005-03-31 03:17:02 PM  
Seeing the headline, I thought this "female wingman" thing had something to do with online gaming -- you know, like that guy who killed some other gamer for selling his Super Mystic Gitchee Goomi Sword, or something
 
2005-03-31 03:17:12 PM  
This chick's rockin your bro on the dance floor
But she's towing an anchor
A junior investment banker
Who's talking about herself and not much more
Ohh
So buy her a beer it's the reason you're here
Mighty Wingman
You're taking one for the team
So your buddy can live the dream
Wingmaaaan
 
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