Please pardon me if you're offended that I find this funny. I went to boarding school for high school, and our students were gathered from all areas of the States. For three years, we had a mysterious vandal, monickered "The Mad Crapper" by the other students, who would evacuate his bowels everywhere but the commode. I often was the first one to the showers (gang showers (very prison-like)) in the A.M., and a number of times I found very flagrant signs of the Crapper's presence. In the stalls, too - only he would defecate next to the commodes. He was pretty good about restricting his activities to the lavatory facilities, but for three years, we had no idea who it was.

After my third year of boarding school, the institution closed. Somehow, the Crapper's identity came to light during the closing process. I don't really remember how, but I DO remember that it was a central American immigrant germophobe. He was afraid he was gonna catch the HIV or something from the toilet seats.

Anyway, funny stuff.

/Not Submitter

the mad shiatter what shiats at midnight?

/yeah baby, yah!

Headline changed to protect the innocent

/Not submitter

Well, you know what they say, shiat happens...

/bad cliche, but had to be done

Commander Camparelli stands at the podium of the ready room...

Now this matter of the"Phantom Shiatter"...

I know it's a phenomenon that occurs on an aircraft carrier in combat that goes back to World War Two, but this has gotten out of hand.

Last night a note was left saying the The Phantom would strike and this morning a. ...turd...was found in the XO's ashtray.
That only means one thing gentlemen...

he leans forward on the podium

..it means that it's not fighter jock or recon puke who is doing this thing it is an A-6 driver because no one else on this ship can hit the XO's ashtray!

Now, it could be your roommate, pilot, bombardier, think about it.

Camparelli lifts up from the podium...

Movie officer! What is the film for tonight?

A man stands from the group.... Uh, They Shoot Horses Don't They, sir. It's Jane Fonda Sir.

Any skin?

Uh, No sir.

Cancel it!

That's nothing. After UCLA lost a first-round NCAA tournament game in the 1990's, someone sent then UCLA coach Jim Harrick a steaming pile in a box via US Mail.

UCLA Police never caught their mad defecator.

Ya know, if somebody goes thru all the trouble of breaking into your room and taking a dump on your stuff, odds are pretty good that you probably deserved it.

Their trail must have gone cold.


/and smelly.

No shiat?

For now, police are continuing their investigation of evidence they picked up from the scene.

Shiatty job...

I don't get the desire for people to do this. When I worked at Earthlink back in the mid 90's we had some guy that used to get his jollies by rubbing his feces all over the mens bathroom. Eventually they put a camera facing the door and finally caught the guy by reviewing a tape.

At the time I was very glad I worked in the IT department (we had our own building originally) instead of over in the main building with all the tech-support monkeys. Alot of those people were literally the dregs of society.

Still... WTF? Why smear your poop? And it was just smeared too, its not like he was writing messages on the wall with it. Not that its any better, but atleast I could understand it if someone was doing something creative with their poop... like a mural or something.

Poop tagging?

Oh well

First Triumph!

This is hilarious. RA's suck. But this is not so bad. One RA last year unknowigly washed his hair for a month with shampoo that had a mixture of semen and old piss in it. Bet he doesn't hand out any more stupid-ass fines anymore.

/insert witty Hot Karl refernce here
/.nothin'

/needs to learn to use the preview function

In middle school we had our own "Mad Pooper", as he was dubbed by the teachers, who went to town in the boys' locker room. Our health/gym teacher offered us all As on our next health test if we told him who did it and they were able to punish him. It turns out I was the only kid in the class who didn't know who the Mad Pooper was, and everyone else happily turned him in. However, there was no proof he did it, and in a town where every third kid had a lawyer for a parent the school did nothing and we didn't get our As.

My friend was an RA at ZooMass and she said any time she told someone to stop playing their stereo at top volume at 2 a.m. on a Tuesday night, guaranteed within 24 hours her lock would either be superglued shut or urinated upon. I would never recommend anyone be an RA after some of her experiences.

If you can't take a shiat in the toliet then don't take one at all.

/Yeah, it's a twisted version of a line in bambi. So what, wanna fight about it.

I did it :(

"We're going through some physical evidence," said Strom. "We'll process it as we see fit."

Ha ha. They have to process the shiaaatttt..

Alright, I AM an RA and I think this is funny.

Note to college students: Most RAs don't want to catch you doing anything, and you won't get caught if you just shut your farking door when you want to do something illegal. I look at it as punishing people for being stupid enough to get caught.

The Mad Dorm Defecator. Sounds like some comic book villain.

Student Life agreed not to print the names of the Lee 3 RAs due to the sensitive nature of the situation. The RAs asked Lee 3 residents not to speak to reporters. The Residential College Director for Lee, Urisonya Roberson, also declined to be interviewed.


See people, dorm room defecation is a perfect example of why we as a nation need the Patriot Act.

Register Here for Full Access to Student Life

No.

should have been lit...

2005-03-26 05:27:23 PM SH

Luckily they weren't victims of an "upperdeck".

AntiUpperdeck.com

That's got to be one of the most disturbing things I've ever heard of.

/going out...buying a lock/chain for my tank

When I was a freshman in High School we had a mad shiatter. At some point, it got so bad that they locked the bathrooms and you had to get a key from the principal's office.

Since that didn't work (access control != accountability), they installed surveillance cameras. And that was back in the days, when CCTV was exotic and cameras were expensive. At some point, they wanted to install cameras inside the stalls. That's when the school board stepped in.

AFAIR, there was a general assembly. Afterwards, the mad shiatter either transfered to another school or found a good therapist. And nobody ever found out who he or she was.

It pains me to think that I didn't get into WashU but a Mad Dorm Defecator did.

Najeh Davenport?

Think about the timing involved here ...
The person who did this had to pick a time when the RAs were gone AND he had to poop!
Unless, of course, he'd been saving the poop for just such an occasion.

This incident also reminds me of what happened with NFL running back Najeh Davenport a couple years back. He was arrested after he broke into a woman's dorm room at the University of Miami and pinched a loaf in her closet.

That rug really tied the room together.

Smells like teen spirit, eh?

We had our own vandal known as the "shiatting bandit"

I bet it was one of the drunken sorority girls! Alpha Phi!

do not GIS for "shiat". do not, for the love of god.

I knew a guy who used to shiat/piss in his closet because he was scared of the dark.

He was 15...

A couple of years later, he broke into our shed, stole some gas and managed to light the car he had stolen (his mom's) on fire because he was using matches to peer into the gas tank.

Alyson

HA! One of my favorites.

Man, and I thought farting into my roomates phone reciever was bad.

When I was in the Army we had a mad shiatter. We eventually caught him and beat the shiat out of him before we turned him in.

"It was disgusting. The behavior was totally unacceptable and inconsistent with behavior expected of the Washington University community."

Really? At my school, we actually had a semester-long class on the art and science of shiatting in your RA's dorm room.

moops: do not GIS for "shiat". do not, for the love of god.



Argh! My eyes! Red upholstery for a red car!