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(IOL.co.za)   Man covers himself in talismans to make himself invisible during bank heist. Is dismayed to learn that they don't stop bullets, either   (iol.co.za) divider line 74
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11533 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Mar 2005 at 12:21 PM (9 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-03-18 09:18:32 AM
 
2005-03-18 09:39:27 AM
Mamadou Obotimbe Diabikile: Awesome name, lame talismans.
 
2005-03-18 09:48:53 AM



"Being invisible is the BEST!"

/slightly obscure
 
2005-03-18 10:10:35 AM
What about mace? Are you immune to that?
 
2005-03-18 10:42:34 AM
That's silly. He should have prayed to God and said some 'hail Marys' on his rosaries. That would have made more sense.
 
2005-03-18 11:40:36 AM
Rye
everyone knows Stoneskin sucks..
str+agil+seering .. +windfury on a big 2hander = the win.

Talismans.. thats like those weird people who wear crystals around their necks for whatever whack-job reason.
 
2005-03-18 12:26:29 PM
Nice headline.
 
2005-03-18 12:26:31 PM
Allright you hayseeds - this here's a stick up... everybody down on the ground,... don't nobody move...
 
2005-03-18 12:26:51 PM
"...before being shot and wounded by an army corporal posted on duty to guard the bank's premises."

"Attempted bank robberies are extremely rare in Mali's capital."

So why the need for an army corporal?
 
2005-03-18 12:27:56 PM
Did anyone see Mr. Furious, the Sphinx, the Shovellor, the Blue Raja, or the Bowler? Maybe he forgot to enlist their help.

Ok, that was lame, but I got nuthin.
 
2005-03-18 12:27:57 PM
everyone knows Stoneskin sucks..

"How many tinks do I have left?"
 
2005-03-18 12:28:51 PM
Frosted lucky charms would have been better. At least you have the magically delicious going on.
 
2005-03-18 12:29:18 PM
Lindsey had those removed by the PTB last season. He also died at the end of the last season, so it couldn't have been him.

/Angel
 
2005-03-18 12:29:48 PM


Whenever I see this logo, I know the story following is complete and utter bullshiat.
 
2005-03-18 12:30:38 PM
lightning bolt!
 
2005-03-18 12:30:55 PM
 
dly
2005-03-18 12:31:12 PM
no sh*T,doesnt he know that all you need is an ex-presidents mask?
 
2005-03-18 12:31:20 PM
 
2005-03-18 12:31:43 PM

"Our security arrangements worked," BDM chairperson Abdoulaye Daffe said. "The guards are stationed in such a fashion that this hold-up couldn't have succeeded."


Unless, of course, the robber was actually invisible. Then your so called security arrangement wouldn't be worth a wet fart.


Usually when I want to become invisible, I use the "Burt" method, and snap my fingers.


/Not obscure in the least.


 
2005-03-18 12:32:42 PM
What society has talismans and banks, but no reflective surfaces??
 
2005-03-18 12:34:05 PM


Sought for questioning.
 
2005-03-18 12:34:23 PM
Should've just used a talisman of 100% missile protection.
 
2005-03-18 12:35:17 PM
Sounds like this guy was a "Shadowrun" player who crossed the fine line between Sci-Fi/Fantasy role-playing and real life!

For those interested, Shadowrun is a great pen & paper role-playing game set in the middle of this century. It's an interesting mix of cyberpunk gunplay and fantasy magic with Ork's, Trolls, Dwarves, and Elves.

In this case, I have to default to the great line penned by Larry Niven & Jerry Pournelle in their novel 'Oath of Fealty' when they referred to darwin award winner types: "Just think of it as evolution in action"
 
2005-03-18 12:36:28 PM
15 kg = 33 lbs.
33 pounds of gris-gris.
This article REALLY needs a picture.
 
2005-03-18 12:37:02 PM
Focusing now on para. 3:

... "He counted on his gris-gris to make him invisible and invincible," the source said, ...

Got a couple of questions here: Had they done so in the past? What reason did he have they would do so now?

... the man had been wearing 15kg of charms, ...

Goodness gracious! That's over 30 lbs. of gris-gris!

... while police found more on a search of his home.

'Ppears he may have picked up the wrong ones.

Next time, bud, take a look in the mirror before you leave home. That should tell you something. Either that, and/or sue your local shaman.
 
2005-03-18 12:37:17 PM
Que naked Eric Cartman at the auction.
 
2005-03-18 12:38:35 PM
Focusing now on para. 3:

... "He counted on his gris-gris to make him invisible and invincible," the source said, ...

Got a couple of questions here: Had they done so in the past? What reason did he have they would do so now?

... the man had been wearing 15kg of charms, ...

Goodness gracious! That's over 30 lbs. of gris-gris!

... while police found more on a search of his home.

'Ppears he may have picked up the wrong ones.

Next time, bud, take a look in the mirror before you leave home. That should tell you something. Either that, and/or sue your local shaman.
 
2005-03-18 12:39:40 PM
Was it this guy?

 
2005-03-18 12:40:13 PM
"Without them we're just ordinary human beings."

"Not quite so ordinary, Catman."
 
2005-03-18 12:41:25 PM
Talismans.. thats like those weird people who wear crystals around their necks for whatever whack-job reason.

Yea, I wear one. Reason: it's spiffy.

/...and I wanted resistance to elemental damage
//why is it not working???
///i want my money back! *gets ready to cast magic missile*
 
2005-03-18 12:41:36 PM
There's two theories to protecting banks.

US and some other Industrialized countries - Let the robbers take some money, get it back via insurance policies and surveillance of the criminal.

Advantage - takes away having to employ extra people, keeps innocent bystanders from being adversely affected, no accusations of bad policeman.

Disadvantage - robberies are more likely to happen.

Everywhere else - Put a couple of guys with huge guns out front and shoot the crap out of anyone who tries to rob it.

Advantage and disadvantages - flip the comments above.
 
2005-03-18 12:41:38 PM
skinink: Usually when I want to become invisible, I use the "Burt" method, and snap my fingers.

I was wondering if anyone else was thinking of Soap.
 
2005-03-18 12:43:31 PM
...not having to do with this thread at all...

where did the boobies from earlier go? i know i didn't just imagine them...i saw them, they weren't fabulous...but still it's the principle of the whole thing. withdrawn boobies...for shame!
 
2005-03-18 12:45:04 PM
Being invisible is useless unless you can fondle some SbB strippers.
 
2005-03-18 12:45:32 PM
Should have used the Snake talisman for invisibility!

One more thing! The dog talisman grants immortality!
 
2005-03-18 12:45:56 PM


You really do need to make sure that your talismans are fresh. And NEVER buy the canned kind. Otherwise you're just begging to botch your invisibility spell.
 
2005-03-18 12:46:10 PM
"He counted on his gris-gris to make him invisible and invincible"

Gris-Gris = Bling-Bling?
 
2005-03-18 12:48:42 PM
2005-03-18 12:41:36 PM 12349876

They use the second option in Ecuador. In grocery stores. Nothing like a couple of guys with sawed-off shotguns at the door to make you think twice about pocketing that Snickers bar.
 
2005-03-18 12:48:43 PM
How did he get shot if he was wearing 33 pounds of not-so-magical armor?
 
2005-03-18 12:48:46 PM
/Salute Rye_
 
2005-03-18 12:49:00 PM
How many Farkers remember the cliche kitty? Not many I suspect.
 
2005-03-18 12:50:00 PM
Why the hell did he need a gun if he was invisible?!
 
2005-03-18 12:50:39 PM
that sure is a lot of bling
 
2005-03-18 12:51:29 PM
Zyklon B. Goode: How many Farkers remember the cliche kitty? Not many I suspect.

Why wouldn't we remember it? God knows how many millions of times it has been ritually "sacrificed".
 
2005-03-18 12:53:50 PM
...he could give no coherent explanation

That's happened to me a few times.
 
2005-03-18 12:54:10 PM
They only failed because the guard shouted 'Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt!' while firing.

/Can I have a Mountain Dew?
//Yes, you're drunk! Now shut up!
 
2005-03-18 12:55:40 PM
i put on my robe and wizard hat ...
 
2005-03-18 12:57:05 PM
should have used the Talisman of Rebirth...

/ninja gaiden xbox -- good ass game
 
2005-03-18 01:06:22 PM
Gris-gris = mojo bling-bling = juju bling-bling

It really makes my day to write stuff like that.
 
2005-03-18 01:07:10 PM
He should have covered himself in bacon.
 
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