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(Some Guy)   "I�m home the masturbator" spelled out with 407 books in Central Washington University�s library.   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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20686 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2002 at 2:01 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

77 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-03-13 02:06:42 PM  
May I be the first to say: WTF?
2002-03-13 02:07:20 PM  
I'm not understanding what happened here. How did they spell it out?
2002-03-13 02:07:20 PM  
psa we are on to all you nocturnal masturbator hiding in the libraries.
2002-03-13 02:07:52 PM  
Kids these days.
2002-03-13 02:08:48 PM  
I think I just found my new rallying cry.
2002-03-13 02:09:06 PM  
I'll second that.

2002-03-13 02:09:23 PM  
How in the hell do you use four-hundred books to spell a phrase that contains twenty letters?
2002-03-13 02:09:23 PM  
"the masturbator" = the signature?
2002-03-13 02:09:25 PM  
"Spranger performed acts of masturbation in front of women, while wearing a ski mask, on 40 different occasions, of which half were on campus."

2002-03-13 02:09:48 PM  
Ah the things we did, when we were relly farked up on alcohol in school.

good times
2002-03-13 02:10:00 PM  
I second that.
2002-03-13 02:10:00 PM  
Did he develop for the guys that made Zero Wing?

2002-03-13 02:10:00 PM  
Clearly punctuation is a problem at Central Washington. It should be "I'm home, the masturbator." That's how I used to write it anyway. Er....nevermind that last part.
2002-03-13 02:10:47 PM  
What a whack job.
2002-03-13 02:10:47 PM  
I have friends that go to Central WA.
2002-03-13 02:10:48 PM  
All your cum are belong to us!
2002-03-13 02:10:52 PM  
407 books? Man - that must have been a big message
2002-03-13 02:11:02 PM  
I'm sort of wary of posting here right now, since it appears that my computer is somehow managing multiple posts...or something...but at any rate I don't really understand what happened here. Did he write it out each letter with books, or what?
2002-03-13 02:11:28 PM  
...the hell?
2002-03-13 02:12:45 PM  
I'm incensed! This is horrible! Honestly, you'd at least expect a university student to use proper punctuation.
2002-03-13 02:13:37 PM  
"If someone wanted to hide, they could pull it off," Jim Brand, a library circulation supervisor, said. "They could climb over room dividers into the private rooms."

Way to go, explain in a newspaper to the students how they can easily break into the private rooms.
2002-03-13 02:14:25 PM  
Did the pages of the 407 books stick together?
2002-03-13 02:14:30 PM  
Almost as funny as the gramatical genius that was All Your Base..

and whats going on with fark? farked.
2002-03-13 02:14:31 PM  
how are you gentlemen

I'm home the masturbator.

All your books are belong to us
2002-03-13 02:14:52 PM  
NotSoCreative:What a whack job.

What a wank job!
2002-03-13 02:14:52 PM  
In a non related story, God killed 407 kittens outside of Central Washington University's library.
2002-03-13 02:16:41 PM  
I squeezed out a few in the study carrells at the college I went to. Never advertised it though.
Even gave the girlfriend some fun a couple of times.
2002-03-13 02:16:41 PM  
Almost as funny as the gramatical genius that was All Your Base..

and whats going on with fark? farked.
2002-03-13 02:17:11 PM  
Spranger performed acts of masturbation in front of women, while wearing a ski mask, on 40 different occasions, of which half were on campus. For a year previous to his arrest, he managed to evade police and Central officials.

The HERO tag would here be appropriate.
2002-03-13 02:18:45 PM  
this is boring. BOOBIES.
2002-03-13 02:19:23 PM  
What is the frequency?
2002-03-13 02:19:53 PM  
He killed 40 kittens: HERO?
2002-03-13 02:21:10 PM  
Fark is farked. It's taking a long time to post.

I'm sure it wasn't a surprise to any of the students how to get into the private rooms.

They did some renovating years before in the dorms where I went and they made "suites" into two rooms. You could climb in the top of your closet and move the ceiling tiles and step into the closet next door.
2002-03-13 02:21:55 PM  
It was probably an engineer... those guys don't get out much.
2002-03-13 02:22:12 PM  
dude, I USED TO LIVE THERE! telling you from experience, never go to ellensburg(central wa U) its the boringest place you will ever live, i now live in florida...
2002-03-13 02:23:48 PM  
I guess library masterbation is a wider spread phenomenom than I thought. My university, McMaster, had an urban legend about a fifth floor libary perv known as the McMasterbator.
2002-03-13 02:24:31 PM  
And some librarian had to touch and open all 407 books? Goes to show you should NEVER shake a librarian's hands.
2002-03-13 02:28:08 PM  
A pic would be would a photoshop..
2002-03-13 02:29:38 PM  
did someone really sit there and count all 407 books? or did they get rainman on the case?
2002-03-13 02:30:25 PM  
i have some issues with this article:

"a facilities management custodian, reported to work at the campus library and found, in the fourth floor lobby, 407 books spelling an anonymous message: "I'm home the masturbator."
NOT anonymous. it is signed. also, it is not clear HOW 407 books spelled it out. did he lay them on the floor? if so, where? how was there room if it was inside?

"On May 22, 2000, Matthew Joseph Spranger, a 22-year-old music major, was arrested on charges of indecent exposure."
are they linking this to spranger? if so, where is it spelled out in the article? are we to just assume?

"they could pull it off"
nice choice of words.
2002-03-13 02:33:12 PM  
I assume they just arranged all the books on the floor in the shape of the letters. Picture would be nice.
2002-03-13 02:37:16 PM  
Couldn't he have made it an even 410 and thrown in a comma? A dash would have worked to.
Stupid the masturbator.
2002-03-13 02:38:07 PM  
He would have used 814 books, but he was one-handed the whole time.
2002-03-13 02:38:43 PM  
Hwa hwa hwa
LOL, That dude is one wank job.
Heh, I wonder if this was a "group effort"
or if the act was solo.
2002-03-13 02:39:30 PM  
He would have used 814 books, but he was one-handed the whole time.
2002-03-13 02:40:21 PM  
"I'm home the masturbator"

All your base are belong to us.
2002-03-13 02:42:48 PM  
He would have used twice as many books, but he was one handed at the time.
2002-03-13 02:43:27 PM  
Outshined: I agree. It would have been really cool if they were able to make a message out of the titles though.
2002-03-13 02:43:32 PM  
Worst written article ever

Fark is painfully slow
2002-03-13 02:45:23 PM  
me sad sad bad naughty monkey person make me sad home sad naughty dirty.
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