Remember the time bill bratsky was swallowed by an avalanche and pissed his way out by drinking 2 cases? HERES TO BILL BRATSKY!! Bill bratsky!!

/obligatory SNL
/obscure?

McGyver would have peed his way to the gas cap, siphered gas into the bottles and make mini, molotive cocktails and get out much quicker and not be drunk.


But hey, if you think the end is near what better way to handle the situation other than to drink every single beer.

LOL

This is the best use of the Hero tag I have seen in a while.

I don't drink, but even I'd drink to this.

I attempted a golden shower once on my now ex girlfriend, it freed me as well.

outstanding, true or not, ill raise one to the man who did it, or the man who made it up. cheers.

Alcohol brings blood to the blood vessels, and blood vessels to the surface of the skin. Where the cold air cools the blood quickly, which in his case would expidite the process of hitting hypothermia and cause him to go into shock.. He's lucky he did not die from it. What a tard.

doesnt it burn after peeing acouple of those bottles? ouch

/good for him

In America we have the six pack.

In Slovakia, they got the sixty pack.

ciphero

60 bottles of .5 litre beer.

For the metric challenged, those are tall boys fellas.

In my neighborhood the 24oz is a tallboy.

I think I finally understand Christians and the Bible.

I don't know for sure that this is true, but I sure as hell want to believe. And therefore I do believe.

/starting a new religion based on this guy as the Savior

Beer has many nutrients in it... he would stay alive for a while by drinking them... that's the way to go, he was prepared.

2005-01-28 10:42:44 PM DrBear
I wonder how many (like me) tried to post the original on this but had it rejected because it's on Ananova?

IP raises hand: "Oooh! Ooooh!"


/Searched all over for different source too...

Beavis (hands on chest): "AH, my liver, my liver!"

Butthead: "Lower stupid."

Beavis (hands on crotch): "AH, my liver, my liver!"

Damn, dude! That guy's hard core!

FAKE
It's Ananova, people. About as credible as the Weekly World News.

IP

I tried to submit this one too, foiled by Annanova!

/was gonna use da hero tag too.

DON'T EAT THE YELLOW SNOW.

Lets get prepared people!

watch out where the huskies go and doncha eat the yellow snow!

Frank Zappa is da bomb

This story really is not possible. First, if you're burried in an avalanche, body heat is a precious thing and you're losing it rapidly; risking hypothermia.

Second, 60 cans of beer would take a long time to drink. Especially at a pace which doesn't poison you or knock you out.

Third, a miniscule stream of 96 degree urine would do nothing against freezing temperatures and many feet of compactd snow. If you could consume, process and urinate all 60 beers at one time, it might work. But a handful of beers every hour or two (so that you don't pass out) would not provide enough of a stream to do much. It would be like trying to clear an icy windshield by using one cup of water every thirty minutes instead of a giant bucket-full all at once.

Farkers are so damn gullible.

Beer- the cause of -and solution to- all life's problems

As much as I'd like to believe...

It didn't happen.

(golf clap)

What better argument for drinking and driving.

Outsourced_to_India

Actually one arctic survival technique is to actually bury yourself in a snow fort. Snow is full of air pockets, and it's actually a pretty good insulator... once you get past the fact it melts.

What snufs most people in avalances is either asphyxiation or being crushed under the weight of rocks, snow, etc. If you have an air supply, and not reduced to 2 dimensions, you are looking at starvation before the elements will do you in.

I don't think it's real either, but I don't think that body heat is a huge problem. Snow is quite a good insulator. If you're ever stranded out in the snowy wilderness freezing to death, building a snow cave is a good way to stay alive.

ChickenFriedMonkey

Man, read the thread before you start posting. My god, I had said the exact same thing a whole 10 seconds before!

/jk
//Glad to know I'm not the only one who knows that

outsourced
The rate at which a job is processed has no bearing on whether or not it is actually completed. Take your windshield example- yes, it would be faster to melt it with a whole bucket. However, if all you have is a cup, it will still get the job done but just take longer.

Same with piss. Sure, if he had a lot of piss at one time he could have done it faster, but it says 2-4 days. Job still gets completed, just slowly.

Perhaps there's a reason you were outsourced, your logic is 1 beer short of a sixpack.

It could be a real incident...and a nice story to tell the officers so they don't haul you off to jail for drunk driving or drunk car-skiing or whatever....

"Offisher, shee, what happened wuzzzhh..."

Anyway...now I have a reason not to buy a snow shovel (rarely snows enough in Nashville, but could have used a shovel -- or hot pee -- 2 winters ago).

I would be interested in seeing Snopes' take on this.

Or better yet, Mythbusters. I bet those guys are more than up to the task.

Old Fark way of doing things.

2005-01-28 10:37:22 PM ChewbaccaJones


RandyJohnson - Classic Strange Brew reference.

"If you ever want to make it with the fire department you let me know!"

"What about my brother? Can he get a job too?"

I have seen that movie WAY too many times.



New Fark This is BS. No way. I want no fun in my life, and will prove this wrong. i.e. you people trying to call bs to this story or trying to stop us from having fun because of this story.


Have fun with life people. Everything is not life or death. Just have some fun once in awhile.

I second the big unit

Well said.

*writes RandyJohnson's name in the snow*

This is the greatest Fark story ever.

Ahh a great reason to "break the seal"

Heard about this on The Dan Patrick Show today. Dan thought this was the greatest excuse to drink ever. Next time my wife tells me to slow down, I can just say "Hey, what if there's an avalanche. I want to be able to pee my way out. I'm thinking about the family here. What are you going to do to help?"

Well said, RandyJohnson.

We don't need another frickin' slashdot. If I wanted to watch a bunch of geeks fight, I'd toss a boxed set of Star Trek dvds on the floor of an anime convention.

I do believe Megaslow just copy pasted that from the link's comments.

even if he did that it would be an even better reason for him to burn at the stake, even though it started the funneist conversation i've read in a long tme.

don't care whether its real or not, just looking for a reason to laugh right now :)

Why not eat the non-yellow snow to pee his way out? That would kill two birds with one stone... not that it's real anyway.

2005-01-29 01:29:14 AM U R Stupid Until Proven Otherwise

outsourced
The rate at which a job is processed has no bearing on whether or not it is actually completed. Take your windshield example- yes, it would be faster to melt it with a whole bucket. However, if all you have is a cup, it will still get the job done but just take longer.

Your logic is total shiat.

You need a large volume of warm liquid at one time to have any affect. If you fail to understand this, then go outside on a below freezing morning where there is a ton of ice. Pour a few drops of warm water on a big sheet of ice. What happens? Those drops turn to ice almost immediately. Now, take a milk jug of warm water and pour it in the same spot. What happens? It dissolves a large amount of the ice, rather than itself immediately freezing.

Now, tell me again how one man, trapped in an avalanch, using a few ounces at a time, pissed his way out of an avalanch? And the "it took several days" arguement makes it sound even more like bullshiat. As with the frozen ice at home example, you need a large volume of warm liquid at one time. Spreading out that milk jug of warm water over a few hours would do nothing to the sheet of ice in question. In fact, it would only cause a larger, thicker sheet of ice as the incremental warm water itself frozen over it.

Not to mention, for every bottle of beer his body has to process and heat, he is losing some of his own heat. You can only generate so much heat, even in those circumstances.

Now, run along to class.

2005-01-29 01:38:10 AM RandyJohnson [TotalFark]

Stop being a retard, you farking git.

I was scooping the snow from above me and packing it down below the window, and then I peed on it to melt it. It was hard and now my kidneys and liver hurt. But Im glad the beer I took on holiday turned out to be useful and I managed to get out of there.
best. quote. ever.


/ok, maybe not

30 Liters of beer?
I have a hard time believing that one.
I hope it's true because that would be awesome, but I doubt it.

"Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy"
-- Ben Franklin

Outsourced - It wasn't ice that was surrounding him, it was snow, and since snow has a much lesser density than ice, it would melt a lot easier than a giant sheet of ice. Now if you fail to understand this....go outside and instead of pouring your warm water on ice, pour it on snow and you'll see that it melts much easier.

And to the rest of you non-believers: let us farkers enjoy this day by believing that such a modern day hero does exist.