actually, iirc donuts are $0.75 a piece, so he will be making 1013 donuts an hr... or 2,026,666 donuts a year.

"The Winston-Salem-based company last week forced out longtime CEO Scott Livengood and turned to Stephen F. Cooper to try to reverse problems that include sinking profits, a federal securities probe and allegations of corporate deceit."

Right. So appointing a former Enron exec is a sure-fire way to avoid that nasty SEC probe...

Star Jones is the new Krispy Kreme CEO?

Man I love me some Krispy Kremes, fresh in the box from Kroger. KKK? Ahhhh!!!!! *runs away from the Feds*

NeuFutur Magazine

Holy crap!!!

That's $1,580,800 per year . . . and he doesn't even know how to _make_ a doughnut.

wow. We all know he cleaned up enron very well. Makes me happy to know that my billable rate is $175/hr (I see probably less than 1/10th of that through my salary), and all I do is read fark all day, take long lunches, and leave early. Sounds like they are getting their money's worth.

/big4 firms suck a$$

I say outsource his job to some guy in India for only 300$/hr.

Hey, if they can outsource lower level jobs, they should outsource the higher ones too.

/joking.
//wants this man's job.

Maybe that's what this guy's time is really worth. How much does your Mr. Moore charge for a one-hour speech for the same reasons?

i remember when KKs were $2.99/dozen.
/used to call Winston-Salem home

Oh man. I want at leat 3 doughnuts per zecond.

Your new CEO:

Thats asinine, not spiffy.

BAD john_frink! BAD!

*curses his refresh button*

Woah that's a big girl

"That's a huuge biatch"

Guy sounds like a cleaner. That said for that kind of coin he better not be a part time emplyee as the article states.

looks like that girl ate about 760 donuts in an hour.

I detests me some KK with a passion. I hope the whole thing goes FARKing belly up (that's means bankruptcy isn't even an option). It isn't the donuts - its the kommy kulture of krispy kreme.

suck it, KK

/does the happy dance for all the turds who lost their arse buying kk stock

2005-01-25 01:40:52 AM NuclearWinter

I say outsource his job to some guy in India for only 300$/hr.

That's hilarious. :)

He's a corporate restructuring agent. Companies bring him in when they're farked, and he cleans up the mess, making them profitable again. He's not a former Enron exec, he's just helping return Enron to profitability, and now Krispy Kreme has hired him to do the same for them.

That's pretty interesting. I'd heard of specialist CEOs coming onboard for short-term turnaround operations, but, I'd never heard of them being paid on an hourly scale.

And, really, if you think this guy is going to clock 8 hour days, you're sadly mistaken. I'd be surprised if this guy ever clocks in less than 10 hours a day average. And that's if he's honest on his timecard.

Hhehe....ceo punching a clock. I kill me.

mathasaproblem, I just wonder what exactly the job entails to be worth that much money. If the company is already farked, why should they be spending approx 1.5 million a year on this guy? Does he determine which people can be laid off without diminishing productivity beyond a certain point? Or what markets to focus on to try to get a boost? What kind of degree would one use in that field (I'm guessing Finance/Economics, but who knows, maybe law as well *shrug*). Any ideas?

/would still love to be paid 760$/hr.

Notice how all those girls seem much more hotter than they normally would be just standing next to her?

Why yes, Aexia, even the devil-woman in the back is somehow attractive....

john_frink - Damn... does she play for the Steelers?

Anyways, I'm praying my town gets a Krispy Kreme and a White Castle. (And, yes, I've wanted White Castle since many years before I saw "Harold and Kumar go to White Castle")

Well this guy has got the United States cornered. If we're not wasting energy and exploiting people for profit, we're eating a farkload of doughnuts.

And to john_frink,
I can tell you photoshopped that because there's no way there's only 2 X's. :D

Winktologist
She ate the Steelers.

Navin: Seven hundred and sixty big ones. Seven hundred and sixty dollarinies. Seven hundred and sixty donuts.

Bank Manager: Everything's in order, if you'll just endorse this, there.

Navin: Alright, endorsing and filling out the deposit slip. Seven hundred... and sixty... Thousand... dollars.

Axion22, I believe each X stands for acres of cloth used in the making of this garment.

Personally I hope they go bankrupt and are liquidated. The hype concerning the stock when it went public as well as management's attitude that they could do no wrong were what brought this company down. Here's my advice:

* Cook the donuts, not the books. The accounting department is not a profit center.

* You have a premium product. Placing it everywhere diminishes quality and your reputation.

* Avoid any business deals with current or ex family members of executives.

* You must report accurate financial results when expected. If you get delisted, you are doomed.

* You are in an industry that relies heavily on advertising, yet you are just now developing your own campaign. This is absolute negligence.

* You cannot blame poor financial results on low carb diets forever. At some point you will have to admit that bad decision making by management has led you to where you are now.

Am I the only one who can't stomach KKDs? They're way too sugary, for one thing. And so what if they're hot? That is, if they get to their coffee-bath on time. Where I come from, if you don't dunk, you're a dink.

//And if you want to have fun, see everyone, go down to the diner, where the coffee's five, the donut's five, the coffee and donut's ten...

i like krispy kremes, like one a year.

any more than that and i get a case of the POOPS!

/i said poop

What jkmartin said. Also, Krsipy Kremes outta a box sucks, and should be priced accordingly. Not the $1.10 they want to get where I'm at. Maybe $.50 - .75.

It would be smart if they had a campaign that used coupons to get people used to buying Krispy Kremes again on a regular basis, and not just for special treats.

/where's my consulting fee?

Notice how all those girls seem much more hotter than they normally would be just standing next to her?

Good call Aexia

/Going to go out and get me some fat friends.
//NO...going to go out and get me some obese friends

That's why they bring her along, to trap young unwitting men into their grasps only to have them realize in the morning that what looked like Bo Derek last night looks like Bo Jackson in the morning.

2005-01-25 03:12:47 AM CruiserTwelve
The dark-haired one over her left shoulder.
I'd hit it.

I think she just grew another head

/Like "underground grandma"

Maybe KK should use le mew's naked donut man to advertise their product...

/goes to photoshop contest from earlier today.
//sex sells

it's amazing how many people comment on the enron "scandle" without knowing anything about it. the truth is that every strategy employed by enron (and signed off by ander.) was public information found in their yearly prospectus. the real thing you all should be screaming about is why all your fund managers (you know, the guys you give your 15% to) had that information at their fingertips and continued to buy enron stock anyway.

why do you think spitzer's on the warpath (besides a run @ gov.)? he's not a holy crusade; he's trying to make sure the securities market doesn't implode once people find out that their wall street clowns know and research about as much as joe-bob the day trader; if not less

what ehvah. i'm from chicago, but the boston accent kicks ass. all porn addicts should visit www.wild-cherries.com. teen poon tang is the best.

by the way, fush bush, mang

3 things:

1) I looked at the picture, and thought all of the girls were ugly, even with that bull elephant standing in the middle. Maybe they look slightly better than otherwise, but assuming I've been laid anytime recently I wouldn't touch that.

2) It's an exec bought in to turn around enron after the shiat started, not someone responsible for it (for those of you who can't read ~50% of farkers)

3) No matter what you think of KKD's, they are better than what I can get here in Japan, so right now I'd bite into one instantly if I saw it...

//Be greatful for what you have.
///Just sayin'

pah! he's got alot of hard work ahead of him. and corporate jets but we'll ignore those for now. i'm meant to be working but im sitting here farking for $4/hr.

/reading Barbarians at The Gate, would love to be a CEO.
/saying that, The Corporation: The Pathological Pursuit of Profit and Power, is next on my reading list.

any more pics of the girl in the steelers cap?

the cap, not the shirt. but im sure she's lovely too.

the farkin huge girl in the yellow shirt looks like a t-rex with thoes little stubby arms