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(Shreveport Times)   Shreveport's unsponsored Independence Bowl turns down million-dollar offer from strip-club chain. Kittens dump Gatorade on their coach   (shreveporttimes.com ) divider line
    More: Sad  
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8595 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jan 2005 at 6:53 AM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-01-23 12:17:56 PM  
Great headline.
 
R
2005-01-23 12:17:59 PM  
Feeeerst!!!!
 
R
2005-01-23 12:18:42 PM  
D'oh! Beaten by three seconds!
 
2005-01-23 12:20:15 PM  
Moron. That's what you get for trying to be "feeeerst!!!!"
Maybe one less exclamation point would've got it. Go troll other threads trying to become first and go down in history as fark's biggest loser.
 
2005-01-23 12:25:30 PM  
Would they have been paid in only ones?
 
rpl
2005-01-23 12:27:00 PM  
Wasn't that in an episode of Married with Children? Well, i mean except that these jackasses didn't take the offer.
 
2005-01-23 12:37:54 PM  
As long as Iowa State never goes there again, I don't care.
 
2005-01-23 12:38:58 PM  
I've been to the Independance Bowl (hell, I potentially changed the outcome of it). Used to be sponsored by Poulan, the WeedEater guys. They should be happy to get the money and notoriety. Shreveport/Bossier City is the dumps.
 
2005-01-23 12:39:59 PM  
It would certainly be interesting, but a bowl in Las Vegas would be much more deserving of such a title/sponsorship. Shreveport isn't really known for strippers, right?
 
2005-01-23 12:43:47 PM  
I imagine the stippers in Shreveport are pretty lame; but I bet you can get one heck of a lap dance there....those east TX/LA girls are so hot with their buckteeth and horseyfaces.....hey don't blame me; I grew up near there
 
2005-01-23 12:53:19 PM  
I used to live in Shreveport, and Tim Greening's columns are always pretty funny. He's sort of a low-rent Bill Simmons.
 
2005-01-23 12:57:20 PM  
The Fark Bowl.

The Dripping Pussycat Bowl.

The Sad Empty Bowl
 
2005-01-23 01:00:01 PM  
I can see it now!!!!
[image from mikesnewsquips.freeservers.com too old to be available]

BRING IT ON!!!!
 
2005-01-23 01:08:33 PM  
The Who's Got My Bowl? Bowl

"Hey, Stop Bogarting the Bowl" Bowl
 
2005-01-23 01:12:03 PM  
i hate sponsored bowl names. it's hard enough to remember that the TN titans are really the houston oilers without having to try and remember who/where the sponsored bowls are.

find it funny that the jazz now play in utah.
 
2005-01-23 01:26:43 PM  
"Bowly McBowlsy Bowl"

I'd go. (for the t-shirts)

(I've had dumber ideas on Sunday afternoons...shrug)
 
2005-01-23 01:32:34 PM  
Curious:

i hate sponsored bowl names. it's hard enough to remember that the TN titans are really the houston oilers without having to try and remember who/where the sponsored bowls are.

find it funny that the jazz now play in utah.


What is worse about this is that it ruins the very cleverly thematized construct of early sporting days. Once, you could rely on the conceptual continuity of having both the Royals and Kings in Kansas City, Chicago's attempt of mercantile exchange dominance over NYSE by having the Bulls and the Bears, and continuing along the tangential theme of having Bears and Cubs. Dallas with the Cowboys and the Mavericks, Houston demonstrating its influence in space travel with the Rockets and Astros. Sacramento Kings? Why not just call them the Sacramento Sacrilige?

I-Bowl officials are very reluctant, mainly because the $1 million would be paid in $1 bills.

Comedy.

The NCAA has strict rules against sponsorships by adult-oriented products like beer or tobacco, preferring family-friendly sponsors like Tostitos, Outback and orange.

Comedy gold. I want a bowl sponsored by orange, and the letter "Q".
 
2005-01-23 01:34:06 PM  
I think everyone should chip in 5 or 10 bucks each. We could have a Fark Bowl...

/kinda serious...
 
2005-01-23 01:37:56 PM  
Isn't this the town that Id Software was formed in?
 
2005-01-23 01:53:24 PM  
yeah foxstang, I live in shreveport and go to same high school john carmack went to. I went to this years Ibowl and it blew, they need better teams to get a sponsor.
 
2005-01-23 02:00:14 PM  
The NCAA has strict rules against sponsorships by adult-oriented products like beer or tobacco, preferring family-friendly sponsors like Tostitos, Outback and orange.

Hmm, boobies = bad sponsor but snack foods = good sponsor. Because of course having a woody is EVIL, but growing an ass the size of a Canyonero is good family values.
 
2005-01-23 02:25:30 PM  
"mainly because the $1 million would be paid entirely in ones"

*badump-tss!*

Best one-liner all day, though! (snickers)
 
2005-01-23 02:44:01 PM  
NeoBad

Haven't been there in a few years, but when my brother was going to Centenary, there was quite a bit of talent out at the Sandpiper/Million Dollar. The spot was a favorite haunt of the Brothers and Phil (Pantera).

/good timez
 
2005-01-23 02:53:50 PM  
Why in God's name did this get a "sad" tag? Anytime a sporting event can go without some sell-out corporate name, it's a GOOD thing.
 
2005-01-23 02:59:40 PM  
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

I woulda went to it every season if they had a major influence on the half time show!
 
2005-01-23 03:04:22 PM  
Who submitted this headline?

I'm from Shreveport, and it sucks. I didn't think there were any people left in shreveport who had fark-style senses of humor. I'm impressed.
 
2005-01-23 03:05:13 PM  
Didn't I hear the Independence Bowl was in danger of being removed from the roster?
 
2005-01-23 03:09:32 PM  
The NCAA has strict rules against sponsorships by adult-oriented products like beer or tobacco, preferring family-friendly sponsors like Tostitos, Outback and orange.

[image from img168.exs.cx too old to be available]

/hmmm...I think they're missing something...
 
2005-01-23 03:49:10 PM  
This is Shreveport... they need to take whatever they can get.
 
2005-01-23 03:55:23 PM  
R I dont understand the fascination of being the post that begins a thread.... but maybe its just me... worded it that way to avoid fark filter....lol
 
2005-01-23 03:58:54 PM  
Let Me Guest! Victoria's Secret, Joe Boxer and Maxim Magazine wasn't interested in sponsoring the Independence Bowl.
 
2005-01-23 04:49:09 PM  
Nice headline. But even nicer post by HerculesRockefeller.
 
2005-01-23 05:04:22 PM  
Amazing how the submitter packed more funny into one headline than the author did in T whole FA.
 
2005-01-23 05:47:00 PM  
May I suggest getting Right Guard to sponsor the bowl? After all, Shreveport is the biggest armpit I've ever been to.
 
2005-01-23 05:50:00 PM  
Foxstang

Yeah, the guys who formed Id software started out here in Shreveport at Softdisk. They worked at Softdisk during the day and used the equipment to code Doom at night. When they had it ready they all moved away and started Id software.

Which just goes to show as soon as you can, you get the hell out of Shreveport.
 
2005-01-23 06:32:01 PM  
What's the word? Go Byrd!!
 
2005-01-23 06:40:08 PM  
mathmatix: I dont understand the fascination of being the post that begins a thread....

It certainly has its moments :)
 
2005-01-23 06:42:07 PM  
Oh and also: much love to the Port City.

Believe it or not, there's a lot of fun to be had there.

There are no laws, and anyone can do anything they want.

ontopic: they should have taken this offer.
 
2005-01-23 07:00:51 PM  
Went to the I Bowl in '94 when TCU was playing. Weather sucked, gamed sucked it all sucked
 
2005-01-23 07:38:29 PM  
I thought the headline said "Impudence Bowl".
 
2005-01-23 08:12:33 PM  
mistral:

Hillarious!
 
2005-01-23 09:14:18 PM  
There should be a missed opportunity tag.

Sickle_cell, What you really meant: What's the word? Beat Byrd!
 
2005-01-23 10:04:10 PM  
Baton Rouge? Not from Catholic are ya?
 
2005-01-23 10:38:21 PM  
Sickle_cell Just look on teh super Turbo Tim profile...

/Didnt want to post this in a thread...dont think it matters
 
2005-01-24 12:57:49 AM  
MycroftAB: Yeah, the guys who formed Id software started out here in Shreveport at Softdisk. They worked at Softdisk during the day and used the equipment to code Doom at night. When they had it ready they all moved away and started Id software.

I was the entire Technical Support Department of Softdisk at the time. Man, was the owner ticked when they left. Made us all sign employment contracts.

Shreveport's motto should be "The Nation's Largest Hick Town!" I'm only ½ joking:

It's the only city in the continental USA big enough to be called a "city" that has never had an Amtrak station. Also, I-20 from west of Monroe all the way to the Texas border remained unfinished (and even unstarted) for many years after the rest of the basic Interstate Highway System (all two-digit highways ending in "0" for East/West or "5" for North/South) was completed. Shreveport was, of course, right in the middle of that stretch.

Current population of the MSA is roughly a quarter million people. It's the largest city in over 125 miles or two hours driving in any direction. It is considered the unofficial capitol of the "Ark-La-Tex" region. In terms of area, it's one of the largest cities in the nation (bigger than the State of Rhode Island, or the City and County of San Francisco!). And yet:

It has only three malls (one of which is very tiny indeed) the largest of which has lost all of its anchors, nearly went bankrupt, and was bought out by a Baptist Church, and even it has only one floor and would fit inside the food court of a typical mall in, say, Dallas.

It has a pathetic mass transit system, consisting of less than 1½ dozen routes, only four of which have a 7PM run on weeknights, none of which run later than that, and none of which run past 6PM on Saturdays. On the day after New Year's Day of this year, they finally increased the total number of routes running to neighboring Bossier City by a whopping 50% - by adding another route!

No matter how fast your modem was, in the days of the 9600, 14.4k, 28.8k, and even 33.6kbps modems, you could not connect to any national online service (CompuServe [back when it was separate and #1], QuantumLink [which spawned AOL], GEnie, Delphi, PeopleLink, etc.) nor the nascent Internet at speeds greater than 2400bps, because that was the speed that both TymNet and GTE TeleNet (later SprintNet - the top two packet-switching modem networks in the nation at the time) saw fit to install in Shreveport. Much smaller towns relatively nearby (but still a toll call away) went all the way to 33.6k long before Shreveport got its first 9600 node. I personally was instrumental in them finally getting even that much! This was well into the 1990s, mind you!

But, things are improving. It has casinos now (though Bossier got the lion's share of that, thanks to an assinine Shreveport city councilman who was envious over Bossier having three casinos to Shreveport's two, and loudly pointed out that the parish [Louisiana-ese for "county"] boundary officially went not along the current Red River course, but where it went in 1835. He said this before doing his homework and checking to see where the river actually ran back then. Guess what happened as a result?), has hosted the Miss Teen USA pageant three years in a row, and is finally getting a decent Convention Center. And, hey, it did have the Louisiana Hayride, which was second only to the Grand Ole Opry as the place to go in the USA for country music. Many future music stars (including Elvis) got early exposure by performing at the Hayride (held at the Municipal Auditorium which still exists).
 
2005-01-24 01:21:56 AM  
COMALite J: I lived in Shreveport for the majority of my life and I had no idea about most of the stuff you just said, although it was informative. You make Shreveport sound like its fun to live in with a Convention Center, hosting teenage beauty contests, having a large surface area, and whatnot. Most people will disagree though
 
2005-01-24 08:58:54 AM  
I don't much care for Shreveport (have actually been there) but it would be refreshing to see an honest bowl game. College football is a huge $$$ industry. Using bowl games to sell corn chips to fat folks with high blood pressure is not objectively more socially uplifting than promoting strip clubs. I guess recruiting young babes to work as strippers is emotionally damaging. Either way the bowl game is obviously not interested in social activism, it is about $$$. I say let the strippers run the show.
 
2005-01-24 10:04:38 AM  
Turbo Tim, I'm sorry if I was that unclear in my meaning. I have no idea how you inferred from my post that I in any way associated the word "fun" with Shreveport, but that certainly was not my intention.
 
2005-01-24 11:17:27 AM  
I live in Bossier City(just across the river)

Shreveport blows. Now that they are building their new convention center they realized that no national chains wanted to build a hotel to support the convention center.

Guess what the solution is? Yep. A $50 million city owned hotel.

I hope they lose their ass.
 
2005-01-24 12:53:40 PM  
Kittens dump Gatorade on their coach.

Saw-weeeet headline!
 
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