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(Juneau Empire)   Some bored Alaskan constructs 18-foot-tall robot that shoots nails and 20-foot-long flames (w/pic)   (juneauempire.com) divider line 141
    More: Cool  
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42861 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jan 2005 at 2:19 PM (9 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-01-17 02:00:03 PM  
About time someone got to work on giant robot technology in this country.

We're lagging seriously behind the Japanese in this regard, and I shudder at the thought of an army of Transformers arriving on our shores right now. You've seen what they will do to regular tanks.
 
2005-01-17 02:03:23 PM  
I haven't seen it.

This has got 'apocalypse' written all over it.
 
2005-01-17 02:05:25 PM  
"You've got to have flame-throwers!"

Truer words have never been spoken.
 
2005-01-17 02:05:50 PM  
Yes but... Can it shoot bees from it's mouth?
 
2005-01-17 02:05:54 PM  
"please don't call it a robot"
 
2005-01-17 02:07:52 PM  
Can it shoot nails into your head without you noticing? Because if it could, that would really be the ultimate.
 
2005-01-17 02:10:17 PM  
Alexis: Can it shoot nails into your head without you noticing?

Only if you're scheduled to go to the dentist next week.
 
2005-01-17 02:12:23 PM  
If it has flamethrowers and shoots nails into your head without you noticing, that's neat, but don't call me until it has flamethrowers, shoots nails into your head without you noticing, and turns the enemy gay.
 
2005-01-17 02:14:03 PM  
Dammit peck, you beat me to the Simpsons reference.
 
2005-01-17 02:18:34 PM  
PianoDemon: you beat me to the Simpsons reference.

Sorry.

Oh, and I'd also like to see this thing with AM/FM/XM and 5 disc CD changer. And tinted windows.
 
2005-01-17 02:21:55 PM  
Machine may prove helpful by shooting nine-inch nails

Trent Reznor's gonna sue somebody.
 
2005-01-17 02:23:09 PM  
This is clearly WMD.
Send the asshat to Abu Graib.
 
2005-01-17 02:23:43 PM  
...all-consuming project taking shape in his parent's back yard.

Okay, one of you Farkers needs to fess up...

heh
 
2005-01-17 02:24:06 PM  
Yes this story was already posted. But I believe the last article did not go into flame throwers or shooting nails. Machine is perfect for a union job.
 
2005-01-17 02:24:19 PM  
General Mifune already has an army of these in Zion
 
2005-01-17 02:24:37 PM  
Machine may prove helpful by shooting nine-inch nails

Good - every song they come out with sounds the same.
 
2005-01-17 02:25:59 PM  
Wow. Some genius has finally built a giant mecha with flamethrowers, nail guns, and reflex technology. Something the DoD would KILL to get their hands on.

Soon to be seen at your local redneck demolition derby. This is how Carzilla got his start.
 
2005-01-17 02:26:01 PM  
Yeah, but can they take it over sweet jumps?
 
2005-01-17 02:26:05 PM  
I for one welcome our new Alaskan dork overlord.
 
2005-01-17 02:26:21 PM  
shagenhoes:

Yes this story was already posted. But I believe the last article did not go into flame throwers or shooting nails. Machine is perfect for a union job.


I think it was another one. As i recall the last one was a wooden one, for some guys kids to play in. That being said.. This "child" needs to get out of his folks place and start to have a 'normal' life with real things, not his toys.
 
2005-01-17 02:27:20 PM  
V.2
 
2005-01-17 02:27:48 PM  
get away from her biatch!
 
2005-01-17 02:27:56 PM  
It's fun to smash things...
 
2005-01-17 02:28:13 PM  
Machine may prove helpful by shooting nine-inch nails from the shoulders and 20-foot flames from forearms

Helpful to whom??

/this is why I live in Jersey and not Alaska
 
2005-01-17 02:29:16 PM  
The DoD is not even remotely interested in this. It will be slow, unstable, and barely able to move even with only a fiberglass shell. When you can achieve 60mph with full armor and real controls instead of velcro straps and hydraulic valves, then we're talkin'.
 
2005-01-17 02:29:20 PM  
What? No spinning lazer blades?
 
2005-01-17 02:29:23 PM  
All the robor armor in the world will not get this guy laid.
 
2005-01-17 02:29:31 PM  
So he just needs to get it walking and be able to crush cars in a few months? Hell, if he got that much time might as well set it up to fly as well.
 
2005-01-17 02:29:44 PM  
I don't know whether to laugh at or cry for this guy.
 
2005-01-17 02:30:24 PM  
Did anybody ever play 'MechWarrior'?
 
2005-01-17 02:31:00 PM  
It's an environmentalist wacko's dream, spike trees and toast lumberjacks in air-conditioned comfort.
 
2005-01-17 02:31:09 PM  
Heck yeah, it'll kill a grizzly. Whadda ya think.
 
2005-01-17 02:31:32 PM  
Sounds like someone's watched Robot Jox one too many times.
 
2005-01-17 02:31:36 PM  
balin007

This "child" needs to get out of his folks place and start to have a 'normal' life with real things, not his toys.

Why?
 
2005-01-17 02:31:51 PM  
"Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!"

/meh
 
2005-01-17 02:32:42 PM  
... In fact, I think his robot is more likely to get laid than he is.

Oops, sorry: "mecha".
 
2005-01-17 02:32:55 PM  
yes, it will "walk".

Sure. And I'm sure it will fly too.

Or maybe burrow?

Teleport.
 
2005-01-17 02:33:24 PM  
Metal Gear!
 
2005-01-17 02:33:54 PM  
Isn't "mecha" what they called the robots in "Robotech"?
 
2005-01-17 02:34:25 PM  
"Failure is not an option. I have no choice but to do this. If I don't do it, I will explode."

he thinks he's Gir!
 
2005-01-17 02:34:45 PM  
he should sell it on eBay to join the list of recent total crap peddlers

/eating the virgin mary cheese sandwich just because i can
 
2005-01-17 02:35:40 PM  
there are black people in alaska... with robots?!?!?
 
2005-01-17 02:35:43 PM  
I bet the mecha also serves as a chef with those flame throwers. I bet this thing is going to be on every little kid's wishlist next Christmas.
 
2005-01-17 02:36:07 PM  
He built it to find Sarah Connor.
 
2005-01-17 02:36:56 PM  
 
2005-01-17 02:37:21 PM  
Yeah Big Red Box, the obvious tagline for the headline would have been: In other news, there are black people in Alaska.
 
2005-01-17 02:37:56 PM  
"Can you pund a six-inch spike through a board with your erect penis?"

"Not right now."

"A girl's gotta have her standards."
 
2005-01-17 02:38:23 PM  
 
2005-01-17 02:38:45 PM  
barjockey - you made Pepsi come out of my nose
 
2005-01-17 02:39:30 PM  
Having known several ironworkers, I realize that they are generally a bit off-center, but the part that worries me is this:

"I have no choice but to do this. If I don't do it, I will explode."

/You suppose this is how Ted Kaczynski got started?
//Just sayin'
 
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