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(Some College Student)   The funniest college paper on Oedipus you will ever read   (forums.anandtech.com) divider line 286
    More: Amusing  
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89355 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jan 2005 at 12:10 AM (9 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-01-13 01:17:28 AM
I agree with big_wankel, you suck arse o5iiawah.
 
2005-01-13 01:18:45 AM
Is this what passes for humor these days? A string of non-sequiturs?

I bet you people think Aqua Teen Hunger Force is funny.

(yeah, i'm a buzzkill)
 
2005-01-13 01:18:58 AM
Donald_McRonald!!!

Nguyen's papers are hilarious
 
2005-01-13 01:19:17 AM
Wow, here at Ohio State, I actually have to write real papers.

What? You couldn't join the football team and get the credits that THE Ohio State hands out like candy?
 
2005-01-13 01:20:30 AM
Apparently the Buckeye who has to write "real papers" is not a student-athlete. Don't you read the paper, son?

Damn.
 
2005-01-13 01:22:15 AM
Nickninja
Thanks for the links man
 
2005-01-13 01:24:07 AM
Mirror:

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/image/essay/
 
2005-01-13 01:26:21 AM
o5iiawah
Wow, here at Ohio State, I actually have to write real papers.


If you wanted to show us how much of badass you are, you would have done much better to leave out which school you go to.

/Total-Fark-ignore-list-ation to ensue
 
2005-01-13 01:27:17 AM
EvilClosetMonkey, that essay is by Hugh Gallagher, written for Scholastic Inc.'s high school writing contest in 1988. See his biography for more details. This is the original essay.
 
2005-01-13 01:27:59 AM
For as long as man and mosquito have coexisted,

Ohhh yeah.

and I don't want to labor the point but,

2005-01-13 12:18:09 AM Laughing Budda

Let me get this straight: Oedepus was in love with his mother? Hoo-boy. Who's gonna pay for that wedding?


It's pretty clear that's straight up theft and not referencing.
 
2005-01-13 01:29:43 AM
gahahaha ... I love the last Cited Page XD

Reminds me of The World's Best Chemistry Exam
 
2005-01-13 01:33:12 AM
my personel favorite title of a paper that I wrote last year:

An Earnest Review of Hemingway's Old Man and the Sea

It was just a run of the mill book review, but the teacher said that it was so punny that he had to give me an A.
 
mjz
2005-01-13 01:34:01 AM
hmmm i like this short essay, which like all good short essays, pops.
 
2005-01-13 01:37:16 AM
roguevirus, would be punny if Oscar Wilde hadn't done it long before.
 
2005-01-13 01:38:52 AM
LIGHTENING!!!

http://douglas.min.net/essay/
 
2005-01-13 01:39:50 AM
Heat Transfer Gone Awry(pops)

Ouch. That hit a little close to home. Funny, though.
 
2005-01-13 01:40:09 AM
damn...just when I thought I came up with something cool and original...

oh well, bring on the boobies!
 
2005-01-13 01:44:23 AM
Jesus folks lighten up. It was merely a rebuttial to all these kids who say! I got to X school and this is the paper I wrote and got a B!!!111 Lolorzz!!!!

and its some dumbass kid who wrote a stupid paper about something even dumber, and the paper was graded by a hungry TA in his cold, unheated apartment over a bowl of soup and a stack of books he has to read by next week. THe paper looked good, the TA looked at the student's past work, and C+, B, A-, on down the line.

And its not as though I actually feel DDT is important. it was for a class. I pretended to care, and dont ya know. i got an A.

/hooray for real work in college
 
2005-01-13 01:46:50 AM
dear everyone,

This was funny. Nobody else thinks that your essay that you posted on Fark.com that you think is funny, is funny. Stop posting your essays, they would be links on the front page if they were actually funny. kthxbye.
 
2005-01-13 01:50:37 AM
ummm...o5? you go to the ohio state. no shiat you got an 'A'.

/took "being a dick" 338 last semester
 
2005-01-13 01:51:07 AM
good one, mjz.
 
2005-01-13 01:57:56 AM
cobaltnine

One of the only good things about being a TA is laughing your butt off at the ridiculous crap your students turn in. I can't beleive half of the idiots I have in my classes even graduated high school.
 
2005-01-13 01:58:29 AM
Not funny (IMHO). If an entire class was asked to write a horrible/funny paper on Oedipus, would that paper stand out as being a lot funnier than the rest of them? I highly doubt it. Anyone with even a mild sense of humor could write a paper like that, if they wanted to. I guess people find it funny simply because it's vastly different than a typical college paper.
 
2005-01-13 01:59:15 AM
I hate liberal arts classes :/
 
2005-01-13 02:02:35 AM
mjz: hmmm i like this short essay, which like all good short essays, pops.

linnyr419: LIGHTENING!!! http://douglas.min.net/essay/


He's obviously very concerned about "tree destruction".

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I wonder what the "10" means.
 
2005-01-13 02:03:03 AM
aXvXiA:
I hate liberal arts classes :/
You should just kill yourself now if you knew what was good for ya...
/spent fours years thinking the same exact thing
 
2005-01-13 02:07:07 AM
o5iiawah wrote:

and the paper was graded by a hungry TA in his cold, unheated apartment over a bowl of soup and a stack of books he has to read by next week

Here is where you've shown your ignorance. TAs can't afford normal soup, only ramen noodles in fetid flavored water.
 
2005-01-13 02:08:23 AM
That. Was. Hilarious.
 
2005-01-13 02:11:54 AM
Recently I corrected a paper that informed me that, "Unlike other cultures that worship only one god, the Greeks practice polygamy." Also that Zeus punished with lighting. Ambient, I can only assume.

stuck_in_the_labHere is where you've shown your ignorance. TAs can't afford normal soup, only ramen noodles in fetid flavored water.

You get fetid flavored water? Not fair!
 
2005-01-13 02:12:13 AM
Tried to pass off as real paper, thereby quashing last vestige of potential humor. Additionally, was Boobiesed in geek hardware forum.

/red vs. blue is not funny, either
 
2005-01-13 02:16:40 AM
j_hat:
Oh, I know. This term I actually get to correct their 'grammar', whereas in the EC papers I didn't get that chance (although when I read phrases like 'Their god, the Allah,' I nearly went blind.) That's why I need to stock up on red pens.

Oh, and soup, since it's can-can sale time. That's when TAs *can* afford soup.
 
2005-01-13 02:17:26 AM
Aqua Teen Hunger Force IS funny, damnit.
 
2005-01-13 02:17:50 AM
Forty-Two
Nah, my real paper on Plato's Republic was funnier. I wrote it using the Socratic method -- Socrates asked questions leading to my (fairly far-fetched) thesis statement, and everyone else kissed his ass by saying, "Why, that undoubtably follows, Socrates!"


THAT made me laugh harder than the whole paper. You sir, are awesome.
 
2005-01-13 02:20:51 AM
I once wrote a college paper explaining the reasons that George Clinton and P Funk should come to Case Western Reserve University. Mostly because their ability to drop funk bombs would shake us nerdwads from the very foundations of our core, and deliver us to a groove unseen in Cleveland in eons. That and they have a Mothership. Don't have the paper anymore, to my sorrow.

I got an "A".

One year after I graduated, the school sponsored a concert for George Clinton to show up (I think the paper was to blame). Too bad I was in Alaska at the time.

Too bad I don't like P Funk that much, really.
Too bad George is old and still snorts coke.
 
2005-01-13 02:22:37 AM
o5iiawah, I just had to pile on because I grew up a fan of the Maize and Blue. But before you say anything, I ended up at Northwestern, so, though my beloved Wildcats will be arse-farked year in and year out by both Buckeyes and Wolverines, I will always have the "That's alright, that's ok..." chant to fall back on.

And, roguevirus, take heart. It was a really funny play, so you're following a good lead.
 
2005-01-13 02:25:34 AM
brainkerchief, are you like the TAs I knew who just had to bite off a hunk of ramen and swish it around in their mouths for a bit?
 
2005-01-13 02:25:43 AM
Forty-Two:

Nah, my real paper on Plato's Republic was funnier. I wrote it using the Socratic method -- Socrates asked questions leading to my (fairly far-fetched) thesis statement, and everyone else kissed his ass by saying, "Why, that undoubtably follows, Socrates!"


Now that's freakin' funny! I had to read the 'Public for college last semester and thought it was full of crap, too.
 
2005-01-13 02:27:55 AM


/gross overuse AND underuse
 
2005-01-13 02:29:35 AM
Assuming for a moment that this was genuine: Why would the professor have given him a passing grade at all? I can understand either finding the humor in it and saying "Now please hand in the real one", or giving this guy a zero. Nothing in between makes any sense to me.
 
2005-01-13 02:30:14 AM
My sides hurt and there are tears in my eye. That much I can understand. I think it has something to do with reading the paper.

I'm still trying to figure out why it hurts when I pee.
 
2005-01-13 02:33:30 AM
That's nothing I wrote a paper on how Iraq had WMDs and I got a War.
 
2005-01-13 02:39:51 AM
offers1999, it hurts when you pee because you have farking gonorrhea.
 
2005-01-13 02:43:04 AM
Lemme guess, sophomore in college, maybe a junior a little behind in emotional development...

The point is, o5iiawah that we have to scroll through a paper that gives absolutely nothing to the discussion except for the knowledge of what a douchebag you are. Most people here can give a similar diatribe with $10 words, but they know that just maybe, you don't give a shiat! I'd prove my point by pasting a recently written paper of mine, but html can't handle the equations.

Can't you just pat yourself on the back instead of getting us to do it for you?

Kudos to everyone pointing out the Simpsons plagiarism.

Sorry, just tired and grumpy. Time for bed...
 
2005-01-13 02:44:27 AM
@deernuts: What. You had a whole night? And couldn't do a 10 page paper? I took a European History course a couple of semesters ago. Attended the first class, then nothing for about a month and a half. Of course, there is a paper due like a week later, and of course, I waited till about 6pm the night before to even e-mail somebody asking what the paper was on. I sit down to write my paper at about midnight, and by the time I have to get to my 9:30am class, I've banged out 9 pages (of fairly mediocre stuff, I must say). Later, I'm absolutely floored to find out I got a 93% on the thing. That's the nice thing about going to engineering school --- even when we do have to write papers, the professors are so jaded from the tripe put out by our peers, that even medicore dredge is good far an A :)
 
2005-01-13 02:49:38 AM
EvilClosetMonkey,

Now THATS a classic.
 
2005-01-13 02:59:47 AM
the words

[b]fake

old
[/b]

and

[b]lame[/b]

come quickly to mind.
 
2005-01-13 03:00:23 AM
and also ive forgotten which forum im on, clearly. html...bbcode....arggggg
 
2005-01-13 03:05:32 AM
Ah, AP test essays...

On one of the AP Econ tests a friend of mine didn't want to bother with an essay. Instead he put in two full page drawings:

1) Our Econ teacher as Moses presenting the Three Graphs at the top of a mountain

2) The Economicon labelled "Written in the blood of Adam Smith, bound in the flesh on John Meynard Keynes, watch the Invisible Hand of the Dark Lord drive the thriving economy of the Underworld."
 
2005-01-13 03:09:29 AM
o5iiawah

If you're writing a "real paper," you should probably stop misplacing your modifiers.

Afflicting mostly tropical third world areas, estimates show that malaria kills roughly two to three million people every year (American Council of Science and Health 1998-02).

So... the estimates afflict mostly tropical third-world areas? Or does the malaria?
 
2005-01-13 03:14:51 AM
It would've been more funny if it wasn't so fake...the "marker" had the handwriting of a right-handed three-year-old with Down's Syndrome writing with his left foot.
 
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