That's really funny.

Still recovering from reading that one.

I doubt its veracity, based on page three's comment of "page is to big."

If it's real, -10 to the teacher.

Old.

That's great. *saves*

wow... now it all makes sense... i get it!!!

yeah... saving that paper...

How can you say it's old? The date on the first page says 'November', and the poster (on that forum) says that this is it's first time online.

Not to say I believe him- do you have a link to the 'older' one?

And why are we still talking about this essay, we should all be posting other funny essays. Like this one, that I am too lazy to link:

http://img140.exs.cx/img140/9001/whitman5th.jpg

/found on that same thread. So sue me

This is page 3.

Priceless

From the bible to the popular song,
There's one theme that we find right along.
Of all ideals they hail as good,
The most sublime is motherhood.

There was a man, oh, who it seems,
Once carried this ideal to extremes.
He loved his mother and she loved him,
And yet his story is rather grim.

There once lived a man named oedipus rex.
You may have heard about his odd complex.
His name appears in freud's index
'cause he loved his mother.

His rivals used to say quite a bit,
That as a monarch he was most unfit.
But still in all they had to admit
That he loved his mother.

Yes he loved his mother like no other.
His daughter was his sister and his son was his brother.
One thing on which you can depend is,
He sure knew who a boy's best friend is!

When he found what he had done,
He tore his eyes out one by one.
A tragic end to a loyal son
Who loved his mother.

So be sweet and kind to mother,
Now and then have a chat.
Buy her candy or some flowers or a brand new hat.
But maybe you had better let it go at that!

Or you may find yourself with a quite complex complex,
And you may end up like oedipus.
I'd rather marry a duck-billed platypus,
Than end up like old oedipus rex.

--Tom Lehrer

alright, time to break out my paper that i did last semester...

[VexedThespian]
Musical Theater
[VexedThespian's professor]
Oklahoma!
Ah yes, the wonderful musical Oklahoma! the family classic. Most view this musical as a simple love story, but beneath its innocent faade lies a dark secret, it is one of the worst examples of propaganda to hit this country since Thomas Paines Common Sense.
The musical premiered in the month of March, 1943 in the middle of World War II. While our boys were fighting Hitler in Europe, Rodgers and Hammerstein were busily at work creating a piece of theater so full of subliminal messaging that one would have no other choice than to feel motivated to find the nearest recruiting center.
Oklahoma! is quite simply an allegory. Curly is your average American citizen, admiring the wonderful country side in an obvious attempt to instill pride for being born in a country with such a beautiful stretch offarmland. Jud Fry is an obvious allegorical allusion to Adolf Hitler. I have determined this by his hatred for Curly, who has everything he wants, much like the Jews. His death at the end of the play is a forecast for the allied forces victory.
The musical number the farmer and the cowman which preaches that the farmer and the cowman should get along is so blatantly promoting our union with England and the allied powers. The farmer symbolizes America of course, being the responsible force in the world, waking up early to provide for the rest of the world. Now we dont like to get along with the cowboys, they are wild and untamed and need to be scolded eternally, however, it is better for us to just suck it up and pretend to like them.
The dream ballet sequence is actually a disturbing reference to the attack on Pearl Harbor. It features the imaginary wedding of the two leads, obviously there is turmoil in the world, but the two of them have decided to stay out if it, choosing instead to concern themselves with their own lives, as they continue living in peace without a care in the world, they approach their wedding when out of the blue, Curlys role as groom is stolen by Jud. Just as most weddings take place on Sundays, so would this one have, and as it turned into a nightmare, so did the Sunday morning in pearl harbor.
The character of Ali Hakim personifies the national mistrust of asian Americans living in the country, just as hundreds of Japanese people were viewed as the enemy, not being trusted, accused of being spies, so is the Persian Hakim, wondering from village to village, seducing every woman he comes across until finally, he ends up marrying on of them.
Finally, the scene where Jud and Curly are bidding for Laureys picnic lunch is a vague referral to the Ford motor company being contracted by the government to provide for the militaries needs
Rodgers and Hammerstein have directly contributed to the allied forces success in WWII through their devious tactics in creating support, that although ended positively, is still a betrayal to the audiences of musical theater, by using them as their puppets, instead of their audience.



i skipped half of the class, didnt turn one assignment in on time, got a sixty on the final and Aced the class... my girlfriend nearly broke up with me because i had previously told her that i would perform oral sex on any female professor i had if it would guarantee an A.

refering to my professor who gave me an A for that montsrosity, she sucks, she cast four guys as the proteans in "a funny thing happened on the way to the forum" which called for many script changes (maybe two) unaware of the term protean being greek for "threesome" anywho, some guy failed out of college and i ended up being bumped up to the lead and we were left with three proteans again.

Wow, and I just learned about Oedipus in theatre class today. General ed is slowly redeaming itself...

If this is that spoof graded paper that was posted to TF a month ago, it's still not funny.

Holy Hell. That is hilarious.

That's pretty funny and all, but jesus, i've never seen such poor handwriting for a teacher. that looked like the scribbling of an 8 year old who is learning cursive.

my vote is: fake.

Ah thats good.

Link farked already.

Behold, the power of Fark.

farked? or just reeeeeally slow at the moment...

Farked already!

this bizzo is FARKED already :-(

I don't care if it's fake. I laughed 'till I cried. Don't shatter the illusion for me.

Mirror, anyone?

/kthxgoal

Let me get this straight: Oedepus was in love with his mother? Hoo-boy. Who's gonna pay for that wedding?

I doubt a TA was reading this, Oedipus isn't exactly college material. Keep that shiat in grade school. kthxbye.

I'm surprised this guy managed a D-.

Hah.. my friend just discovered this paper a few days ago on the intarweb and it was all too fitting, because we are currently studying Oedipus.

I think the general consensus was that it, if real, had to have been graded by a TA

This took quite a while to finally get greenlighted...

I laughed for so long after reading that. I love the works cited page.

My favorite fake essay. I got this in an email from somebody claiming he wrote it on a college entrance application.

"I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Brooklyn refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time
efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous blues trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, I can cook thirty-minute brownies in twenty-two minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Canada. Using only a hoe and a large glass of
water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I invented bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the 49ers, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When bored, I build flux capacitors in my back yard. I enjoy urban hang
gliding. On Wednesday after work, I repair electrical appliances for the blind free of charge. I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide marvel over my original line of plaid corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I was once caller number nine. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat 403.

My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany
circles everywhere. Small children trust me.

I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Moby Dick, David Copperfield, and the Bible in one day, and still had time to refurbish an entire 18th century dining room set hat evening. I know the location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations with the CIA. I sleep once a week, and when I do, it's always standing-up. While on vacation in Aruba, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid on time. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact belly
dancing. Years ago, I discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a spoon and toaster oven.
I breed prize winning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis twice."

"A Well-Thought-Out Englilsh Paper"

HR.com does better phony papers.

The humor is in the subtlety.

"The greeks contributed many things to our culture such as olives gyros lenny kravitz anal sex and oedipus."

does that comment by the teacher say "yummy :)"?

Meh.
I didnt think it was all that funny, but maybe its just me? Whoever the "teacher" was had hand writing like a 9 year old.

Kind of funny, but more a summary than an actual paper.

WillKeepOnTryingToAvoidBanWitnNewIDsRegardless

I doubt a TA was reading this, Oedipus isn't exactly college material. Keep that shiat in grade school. kthxbye.

Not true, we read Oedipus (along with Plato, Aristotle, Homer, and many more) at my school, Reed College. And before you claim it must not be a very good school, read this:

"As former Stanford president Donald Kennedy once put it, "If you're a genuine intellectual, live the life of the mind, and want to learn for the sake of learning, the place most likely to empower you is...the most intellectual college in the country-Reed, in Portland, Oregon."

Source

/not trying to brag, I probably don't belong there, but am looking forward to going back on Friday

You know, I think this is the first thing I've seen on Fark that I didn't even find mildly entertaining. I'm a teacher, and I see much funnier authentic papers than that on a regular basis.

I was a TA while working on my M.S., and once I graded a paper where a guy had answered a question by writing, "I don't know." He put an asterisk by it. At the bottom of the page he gave a brief explanation that since "I don't know" was technically a correct answer, he should get credit for it. I agreed.

This is the fakest bunch of fake that ever faked.

semi-farked

Headline should say:
The funniest college paper on Oedipus you will ever read...three months ago.

Reminds me of Peter Nguyen:

http://img20.photobucket.com/albums/v60/profmadhatter/nguyen1.jpg
http://img20.photobucket.com/albums/v60/profmadhatter/nguyen2.jpg
http://img20.photobucket.com/albums/v60/profmadhatter/nguyen3.jpg
http://img20.photobucket.com/albums/v60/profmadhatter/nguyen4.jpg

Torrent of the 7 jpgs from Albino Blacksheep