If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The Sun)   Retired 62 year old asking court to keep sex-starved stripper ex away from him because he's tired (one possible not safe for work pic)   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 73
    More: Dumbass  
•       •       •

19311 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2002 at 8:27 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



73 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2002-03-06 08:30:27 AM
that's one scary stripper.
 
2002-03-06 08:34:34 AM
Well,there goes breakfast!
 
2002-03-06 08:36:09 AM
...breakfast from last week.
 
2002-03-06 08:39:22 AM
I laughed out loud over this one. Loved the part about driving over the cattle grids. Should have bought her some electric love to tide her over in between sessions.
 
2002-03-06 08:39:46 AM
she wouldn't look bad from behind.
 
2002-03-06 08:40:51 AM
I can only hope that when I'm 62 I have this kind of problem.
 
2002-03-06 08:41:34 AM
right on -- Javaman.
 
2002-03-06 08:55:10 AM
hah, I lived in Cornwall for 11 years. I'm suprised he even had ee-leck-tri-city.
 
2002-03-06 09:04:17 AM
And now she's a nursing home assistant. I wonder what she 'assists' with
 
2002-03-06 09:12:26 AM
You Farkers will be lucky to have someone looking like that when your wrinkled old body is 62! I have so many aches and pains at the age of 31 right now that I hope I die from that at 62!
 
2002-03-06 09:21:07 AM
Why dumbass? Cause he complained?
 
2002-03-06 09:26:13 AM
she wouldn't look bad from behind.

Or staring at the top of her head.......
 
2002-03-06 09:35:50 AM
HaHa. I find this story amusing.
 
2002-03-06 09:46:14 AM
I had this problem once, except I was 22 and the stripper was 62.
*shudders*
 
2002-03-06 09:49:08 AM
I just find it amusing that she now works in a nursing home...Scoping out Hubby #2?

3Horn
 
2002-03-06 09:49:29 AM
"After he left he came back into the house and broke my vibrators. But I haven't replaced them because I don't need them any more."

Nonsense. A vibrator is sort of like a plunger... one of those things you always want to have around, you know, just in case.
 
2002-03-06 09:53:38 AM
At least he didn't marry her.He's still a stupid farkhead.
 
2002-03-06 10:03:30 AM
good point, nursong homes must be fertile grounds for golddiggers. broads, who needs em?
 
2002-03-06 10:18:59 AM
Stop the train, I don't wanna get off!!
 
2002-03-06 10:22:13 AM
No mention of how much money he had? Gold digger.
 
2002-03-06 10:23:52 AM
CandyPink.....I couldn't agree more. You know that she was online within minutes of him destroying her toys to purchase new ones. For what is a girl without her toys :)
 
2002-03-06 10:25:19 AM
Thiisssssss sounds like a job for FARKMAN!!!!!
 
2002-03-06 10:27:56 AM
ahhh...girls w/ toys...what a nice thought...like cute kittens or puppies...or a sunny morning...a beach sunset...a drunk monkey...a great deal on a pound of silly putty...

It just warms the heart...ahhhhhhh... :)
 
2002-03-06 10:38:56 AM
Cheers to the brits for coining the term "bonking" and "boinking" and other such variations.
 
2002-03-06 10:49:59 AM
62?? The guy looks more like 92.
 
2002-03-06 10:58:04 AM
A vibrator is sort of like a plunger...

Funny :)
 
2002-03-06 11:15:28 AM
This story warms the cockles of my heart. There may be hope for retirement yet...
 
2002-03-06 11:22:05 AM
Mytwopence?
 
2002-03-06 11:22:40 AM
not all women are whores. that girl needs a hobbie or something.
 
2002-03-06 11:23:38 AM
"Who's your Grampa! Whooo's your Granda"
 
2002-03-06 11:24:47 AM
her hobby is getting old guys off
 
2002-03-06 11:26:28 AM
omg, why can't i meet a chick like that?
 
2002-03-06 11:29:13 AM
He turned to his hobby of photography and met Nina, then a glamour model and lap dancer, during a topless photo shoot at his Essex home. He said: "Within two hours we were having sex."
She wasn't that glamorous!!
I want a stripper to come to my house and let me take pictures.
This must be the British version of Anna Nicole Smith since she's at a nursing home now.
CandyPink and Rita Please feel free to regale us with tales about your toys.
 
2002-03-06 11:34:16 AM
That is SERIUSLY the ugliest face I've ever seen. I still agree with Javaman, though. Wish I had that kind of problem right now.
 
2002-03-06 11:41:31 AM
shes not 22, just my opnion
 
2002-03-06 11:50:29 AM
OK one quick toy story, just for you Clarkins...

When I was 16, my best friend and I (both bi at the time...she *says* she's straight now) decided we wanted to get freaky with each other, and we wanted a toy to throw into the mix. In our state, you have to be 18 to go to the adult bookstore, so we enlisted the help of another friend's older brother. We sent him into the store with about $20, and told him to pick out something "not too huge or scary or anything." He came back out w/ a "12-Inch Vibro Dong." The thing was a hideous orange-peachy color with purplish veins, monstrous, and obviously only good as a novelty item. Neither of us wanted it, but my friend took it and ended up giving it to another friend. The "dong" made the rounds of our group of friends with everyone having it for a few days, and then somehow disappeared. We forgot all about it. Then about two months later, my best friend was working at Burger King when a girl walked up to one of her fellow employees, slapped the "dong" on the counter, and said "I want a refund! Look what I found in my fries!" We never did find out how she got it or what happened to it after that...my guess is it's still "popping up" occasionally around my old school. :)
 
2002-03-06 12:16:51 PM
hahaaaaahaaaaha I wonder which side of this story is the truth. I think for now I will believe the old man. Because it is totally obvious that the chick is a skank.
 
2002-03-06 12:41:41 PM
Clic pic to enlarge
 
GPJ
2002-03-06 12:45:40 PM
Candy - I don't think that was the story Clarkins had in mind, maybe *he wanted something a little more...graphic?
*he = we, as in the male population of this site, pretty much everyone then.
 
2002-03-06 12:46:16 PM
Click on pic to enlarge

Why?
 
2002-03-06 01:00:21 PM
No God Damn Way She's Twenty-Two.
 
2002-03-06 01:07:48 PM
CandyPink Thank you, that was a wonderful story. I am still laughing about it.

I do have to agree with GPJ in that another story would certainly be in order. Perhaps Rita might spin us a yarn as well.
 
2002-03-06 01:13:29 PM
CandyPink...that was a pretty heartwarming story...I love the ending part too... :)

(both bi at the time...she *says* she's straight now)

I have to comment specifically on this tho. She might be straight...or bi and in denial...or gay and in denial...or she might have 'changed' over time. I get this from the fact that I know a girl that was straight and got married...then got divorced (he was an ass) and then decided she was gay...then we got together and went out...then she was bi...then we decided we were really just friends...in which case, she was gay again. I'm not sure what she is now, I suspect she has gone back to bi...best of both worlds I guess.

I guess my point is, she was constantly changing and revamping her sexuality. Why, I don't really know...some of it might have to do w/ her failed marriage. Heck, she might really be straight for all I know...

Hmmm...now I seem to have lost my goal in all of this...I guess I mean that your sexuality can be defined in the moment...at one point in your life you might be gay/bi/straight...then a few years later, that could change. That might have happened to your friend.

OR...here is another scenario (and I think you have mentioned this before as well)...I've seen a lot of younger people 'say' they are gay/bi b/c it is 'cool'...not b/c they are or b/c they even really know what it means...just b/c it is an attention getter.

Now, I give my standard disclaimer as a straight guy who has known gay women (some hate the term lesbian) and bi women...heck, I've dated a few. This by no means makes me an expert.

And one more thing before some ass posts something stupid...
bisexual != group sex

(just the ramblings of a heterosexual)
 
2002-03-06 01:39:37 PM
Clarkins.....One time at band camp.....hahaha. No really my toy stories are far too x-rated ;)
 
2002-03-06 01:47:23 PM
Enphinitie: Yeah, I've known more than one straight/bi/gay/whatever person that changed their 'title.' I even did it myself during the first few years I was reconciling who/what I was attracted to. I just said "she says she's straight now" because well... incidents have occurred between us since she renounced her bisexuality that make me seriously doubt her supposed 100% heterosexual status. I'll leave the rest for your imagination. But hey, what's in a name anyway? :)

GPJ: I've got more... but I'm at work right now and kinda wanna keep my job, so I had to go with the PG-rated one for now.
 
2002-03-06 01:52:19 PM
the old guy is going senile!
 
2002-03-06 02:04:12 PM
OK....I will say this about my favorite toy, it's a Sybian and damn it does the body good! :)
 
2002-03-06 02:11:22 PM
CandyPink...you are exactly right...which is what I think I meant to begin w/ but you succeeded in saying in more brevity..."what's in a name?"

besides...a bi girl once told me, "you fall in love w/ a person...not a sex..."

of course, another girl once told me "sometimes you want to make love...and sometimes you just want to fark..."

They both had really good points...
 
2002-03-06 02:35:22 PM
Rita...damn, is that like the Rolls Royce version??
 
2002-03-06 03:04:15 PM
Enphinitie
CandyPink...that was a pretty heartwarming story...I love the ending part too... :)

(both bi at the time...she *says* she's straight now)

I have to comment specifically on this tho. She might be straight...or bi and in denial...or gay and in denial...or she might have 'changed' over time. I get this from the fact that I know a girl that was straight and got married...then got divorced (he was an ass) and then decided she was gay...then we got together and went out...then she was bi...then we decided we were really just friends...in which case, she was gay again. I'm not sure what she is now, I suspect she has gone back to bi...best of both worlds I guess.

I guess my point is, she was constantly changing and revamping her sexuality. Why, I don't really know...some of it might have to do w/ her failed marriage. Heck, she might really be straight for all I know...

Hmmm...now I seem to have lost my goal in all of this...I guess I mean that your sexuality can be defined in the moment...at one point in your life you might be gay/bi/straight...then a few years later, that could change. That might have happened to your friend.

OR...here is another scenario (and I think you have mentioned this before as well)...I've seen a lot of younger people 'say' they are gay/bi b/c it is 'cool'...not b/c they are or b/c they even really know what it means...just b/c it is an attention getter.

Now, I give my standard disclaimer as a straight guy who has known gay women (some hate the term lesbian) and bi women...heck, I've dated a few. This by no means makes me an expert.

And one more thing before some ass posts something stupid...
bisexual != group sex

(just the ramblings of a heterosexual)


in English, please?
 
Displayed 50 of 73 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report