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(Reuters)   Reality show on Christian missionaries in third-world countries sure to be a hit if it gets picked up   (reuters.co.uk) divider line 174
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5962 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Jan 2005 at 3:18 PM (9 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-01-08 10:35:09 AM
Will it follow the ones that go into Amazon tribal societies and get killed, as well?

The crew would have to be quite ballsy to go to any of those more dangerous places.
 
2005-01-08 10:58:55 AM
because volunteering yourself would require you getting off the couch.
 
2005-01-08 11:05:56 AM
Because volunteering myself would mean I'd have to think that, for some reason, my god was better than their god, and that their belief systems that are thousands of years older than mine were wrong.
 
2005-01-08 11:16:58 AM
Just speculating why it will be succesful.

Personally, I could care less.
 
2005-01-08 11:45:57 AM
That's going to be sappier than Touched by an Angel.
 
2005-01-08 11:51:52 AM
Who's My Deity?
 
2005-01-08 01:28:32 PM
I'd be more impressed with missionaries if they went around building houses and helping the natives without selling Jesus the whole time.

These people aren't altruistic, they have an ulterior motive. "We'll do good things for this heathens, so they can witness the miracle of Jesus!"

Volunteer your time because you care, not because you're hawking a god.
 
2005-01-08 02:05:07 PM
So many possibilities for great names when Fox picks this up:

"Fear of God Factor"
"Who's Your Deity?"
"I've Been Saved, Get Me Out of Here!"
 
2005-01-08 02:10:35 PM
Volunteer your time because you care, not because you're hawking a god.

Well I guess you're in the clear, then.
 
2005-01-08 02:27:39 PM
"Missionary Survivor: Ireland"
 
2005-01-08 03:24:54 PM
It must take alot of hard work teaching the natives to do it Missionary Style.

I bet it takes hours and hours of tutoring...
 
2005-01-08 03:25:06 PM
save me jeebus!!
 
2005-01-08 03:25:41 PM
I gave you a glittering Vegas and you turned it into a seedy Atlantic City.
 
2005-01-08 03:26:11 PM
I'll tune in for the episode where they get cannibalized
 
2005-01-08 03:28:18 PM
They don't have to go to a third-world hell-hole to get cannibalized. All they have to do is show up at a U.S. public school.
 
2005-01-08 03:30:42 PM
I'll watch teh one where they get beheaded in some Islamic country...
 
2005-01-08 03:32:07 PM
Dear (insert name of favorite reality-show-hawking network),

We the people of blah blah hereby declare that reality shows SUCK

Sincerly,
Everyone
 
2005-01-08 03:35:48 PM
Just Ignorant
Volunteer your time because you care, not because you're hawking a god.

Way to prove your nickname.

The people who go on missions do it precisely because they care. The ones "hawking a god" are sitting in mansions waiting for their next million to roll in from the praise-a-thon.
 
2005-01-08 03:36:53 PM
Maybe, in Utah.
 
2005-01-08 03:37:01 PM
Volunteer your time because you care, not because you're hawking a god.

Wonderfully said! But what if your god is indeed a hawk, the falcon-headed Horus?

 
2005-01-08 03:37:28 PM
Just Ignorant, your name says it all.

Missionaries "hawk God" *because* they care. Christians believe that God is THE God. If you read and believe the Bible, you will understand that the only way to heaven is through Jesus. That is why missionaries (and hopefully most non-missionary Christians) are so adament about converting everyone they can. Christians care about others (and their souls!) and don't want any to perish.

/Missionary to the heathens on fark. :-)
//Let the farkically correct Christian-bashing begin.
 
2005-01-08 03:39:02 PM
NuckleheadEd... like your distinction. That is true that there are those "hawking God" as opposed to spreading the Word.
 
2005-01-08 03:41:40 PM
Leave my soul-thingy alone, you retarded freaks.
 
2005-01-08 03:42:27 PM
Maybe you could sell it for a pack of dinosaur sponges.
 
2005-01-08 03:43:00 PM
Missionaries are teh rox0r. I was invited along to Guatemala with my friend's Presbyterian church, although I'm Buddhist. They didn't mind at all -- the point was to go build some houses and make these people's lives better.

Plus, to spread some Jesus. As long as I didn't try to subvert their Jesusification, they didn't have a problem with it. I like the missionaries I've met.

...just so long as they're not Mormons. *shudder*
 
2005-01-08 03:44:50 PM
mrdctaylor: Maybe you could sell it for a pack of dinosaur sponges.


Maybe you could drink some "kool-aid" and let us deal with our own salvation eh?

/can't stand hypocrites telling what I should do with MY soul.
 
2005-01-08 03:45:33 PM
Leave it to Farkers to bash people risking their lives going out trying to spread the word of God.

I guess Mother Teresa was just a selfish, arrogant biatch.
 
2005-01-08 03:46:26 PM

Sister Hollis: "Remember
reading bible plus accepting
Jesus equals food."
 
2005-01-08 03:46:42 PM
There is one particularly touching scene where the missionary sneezees during a sermon and wipes out an entire village with a disease. The touching part: They had all recited the sinner's prayer and accepted Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior right before they dies from the explosive diarrhea and eyebleeding.
 
2005-01-08 03:47:05 PM
 
2005-01-08 03:48:04 PM
Jesus = Horus. Horus was the O.G., J.C. waz pretty much frontin. Dey waz from tha same hood too, not nazareth.
The dying and rising one, yo.

Some similarities
 
2005-01-08 03:50:25 PM
BBanzai:

Leave it to Farkers to bash people risking their lives going out trying to spread the word of God.


I'm all for people helping others. The Peace Corps is a wonderful organization....but to hawk your diety is friggin annoying.
 
2005-01-08 03:50:45 PM
Anybody want to sponsor me to travel the world?

/Will preach anything you want from my sun lounger...
 
2005-01-08 03:51:29 PM
kittz_cat:

Point 1: Not a hypocrite. Or try not to be at any rate. Nobody's perfect.

Point 2: Fair enough. I'll tell someone about God, but you don't convince someone to become a Christian. It doesn't work like that. People should plant seeds--not cram it down someone's throat.

Point 3: Why get hostile? Once again, the anti-Christian hostility on Fark comes out. Relax. The last thing I'd wanna be is preachy and turn people off of God.

/Will try not to be preachy, but hey--I gotta speak my mind.
 
2005-01-08 03:53:40 PM
If you read and believe the Bible, you will understand that the only way to heaven is through Jesus.

You do know that the term Heaven is about the afterlife.

And I hope you do understand that long before Christianity humans already understood the concept of the afterlife and had religious beliefs about such a place, i.e. Egypt. Christianity is one more version of this concept and it came much later.

The founders of the church also used pagan writers such as Plato, Pythagoras and Aristotle to enlighten them about religious matters and didn't necessarily discredit them, seeing some of their ideas as a foreshadowing of Christianity.

If I remember correctly, even Justin Martyr (100 A.D.) held beliefs that were a mixture of pagan and Christian ideas.

Such authors had profound impacts on the Catholic Church, as well as Gnostic texts, and influenced the direction of Christian thought, and it was only much, much later that a Protestant movement developed from Catholicism, but their still are numerous traces found in both. The apple doesn't fall that far from the tree.
 
2005-01-08 03:57:03 PM
I see nothing wrong with spreading a message about peace and hope. If they were trying to control them through some sort of religion that would be different. I dunno if I'd consider myself any one religion, but some missionaries from my town went to South America and on their way back gave all their clothes except the bare essentials they were wearing (so they could still board the plane) to people begging in the airport. I think that's pretty damn cool.

You don't see the anti-christian whiners on here doing that. Oh, and when you finally prove there is no God, I'd sure like to know. But until then, you don't know, so shut the hell up.

Thanks.
 
2005-01-08 03:57:15 PM
Lace Valentine: You do know that the term Heaven is about the afterlife.

And I hope you do understand that long before Christianity humans already understood the concept of the afterlife and had religious beliefs about such a place, i.e. Egypt. Christianity is one more version of this concept and it came much later.

The founders of the church also used pagan writers such as Plato, Pythagoras and Aristotle to enlighten them about religious matters and didn't necessarily discredit them, seeing some of their ideas as a foreshadowing of Christianity.

If I remember correctly, even Justin Martyr (100 A.D.) held beliefs that were a mixture of pagan and Christian ideas.

Such authors had profound impacts on the Catholic Church, as well as Gnostic texts, and influenced the direction of Christian thought, and it was only much, much later that a Protestant movement developed from Catholicism, but their still are numerous traces found in both. The apple doesn't fall that far from the tree.

Lace,
How dare you inject sober and rational analysis with corresponding facts into this forum. Great post!

Let me add: Don't forget the affect Constantine had in blening Roman religious practices and Christianity.
 
2005-01-08 03:57:41 PM
As the article describes it, these guys are jumping all over the place, and even on a bare-bones budget that's expensive. Given that I'd think you'd get a higher conversion rate if you're in one place for quite a while and make multiple contacts with individual prospects, this seems like kind of an inefficient use of contributions.

Assuming they don't have to make any kind of conversion quota, I'd like to apply for their job. I hereby now announce that I'm seeking contributions to travel the world as a missionary for atheism, or maybe Camus' Absurdism. "I've come to give you the good news that you're on your own!"

Anybody? Hello?

Okay, how about for the Church of the Subgenius?
 
2005-01-08 03:57:51 PM
I wonder if we'll get to see the missionaries telling the local folk that condoms don't prevent AIDS.
 
2005-01-08 03:59:20 PM
mrdctaylor:

Point 3: Why get hostile? Once again, the anti-Christian hostility on Fark comes out. Relax. The last thing I'd wanna be is preachy and turn people off of God.

/Will try not to be preachy, but hey--I gotta speak my mind.



Reason #1- I live in IDAHO...where mormans breed like friggin rabbits...

Reason #2 - I was raised Catholic....where you are always made to feel guilty about everything, and you have to tell all your sins to a priest that will judge you and not do anything but have you recite prayers repeatedly.

Reason #3- People are afraid of death, so they use religion to make them feel better about the fact that they will die and fertilize plants one day.

/Don't mean to be so hostile...but I get so sick of people telling me that their god is the only god, and that if I don't believe in their god I will not go to their heaven.

//The is FARK what do you expect????
 
2005-01-08 04:00:09 PM
The = THIS
 
2005-01-08 04:00:24 PM
What's wrong with following the philosophies of secular humanism: care and compassion for others; tolerance and co-operation; taking responsibility for our own lives and for the communities and world in which we all live? Even the most die-hard fundie missionary on a global God-acceptance tour must be able to relate to those tenets - they're pretty much the kinds of things Jebus tells his followers to do.

Sure, leave some bibles lying around for people to read if they want, but quit with the proseletysing. Do good works because you are a human being who wants to help other human beings, not because you think it's going to get you somewhere (which it obviously is not, according to the fantastic comic strip submitted earlier in the thread)...after all, what if you get to the afterlife and discover that the tribal people of bloody Woop-woop or wherever were right when they thought that God was a haystack with a cow's head on top, and heaven is a bunch of seats with cushions on them? Bummer!
 
2005-01-08 04:00:53 PM
I guess Mother Teresa was just a selfish, arrogant biatch.

Well, not everybody thinks she was a saint.
 
2005-01-08 04:01:39 PM
"Extreme Makeover: Soul Edition"
 
2005-01-08 04:02:36 PM
Oh God, we have to hear about the "anti-christian conspiracy" yet again.
 
2005-01-08 04:03:37 PM
Because volunteering myself would mean I'd have to think that, for some reason, my god was better than their god, and that their belief systems that are thousands of years older than mine were wrong.

Also, couldn't that money and time be better spent on starving American children? Aren't christians concerned with people in their own towns?

Most of the people I know who have gone on missions treat it like a church sponsered vacation, they talk about where they went, the bargains they got on souvinirs, sneer about how filthy/stupid/lazy/corrupt/cheap the "natives" are, complain about the food, and oh yeah, we listened to a sermon while we were there too.

But hey Free Vacation! Right? And the chance to be super self righteous! WOO HOO!

/not that there is anything wrong with being religious
//some of my best friends are christian
 
2005-01-08 04:04:10 PM
I always found it kinda sweet when my Mormon friends cared enough about me to try to convert me to Christianity and thus save me.

In a way, they cared more about me than I cared about them, because I never have sat down with them and explained that to the best of all evidence, they're wasting a significant amount of energy on an obvious bugaboo.

...but then, the vast majority of religious folk don't do much harm to anyone, and might even be doing themselves some good. If religion is a crutch, sometimes a crutch is a good thing. I needed a crutch once to walk; no shame in that.

/Fark is a crutch.
 
2005-01-08 04:05:25 PM
much of the actual missionary work is covered not outright but by references or discussions after the fact

Bunch of weasles. So you don't get to see them offering food for conversion, or how converts are murdered by the locals while the two scumbags go off on their next venture to another town, or how they offer to put the body of christ into a woman's vagina with their penises or how they engage in all the other dirty missionary tactics, eh? Sick bastards!
 
2005-01-08 04:06:38 PM
Just further proof... people will watch anything.
 
2005-01-08 04:09:41 PM
I wrote:
/not that there is anything wrong with being religious

Except, of course, bilking people of their money, lives, property, time and minds.

World's second oldest profession people!

/there are a few good aspects of religion
//some of my best friends are christian
 
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