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(Fox News)   Marine originally thought kidnapped, not kidnapped, beheaded, not beheaded, deserted, not deserted, now being charged with desertion is now missing   (foxnews.com) divider line 74
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11285 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Jan 2005 at 4:40 PM (9 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-01-05 04:42:33 PM
anyone surprised?
 
2005-01-05 04:42:46 PM
A+

I read this headline every year, and it gets better every time.
 
2005-01-05 04:42:47 PM
piece of crap
 
2005-01-05 04:42:49 PM
Wow, good job submitter! You got it in only 3 tries!

Too bad the headline is not funny anymore.
 
2005-01-05 04:43:31 PM
Where am I? Who are you? What is That?
 
2005-01-05 04:43:38 PM
Maybe he is getting abducted by aliens and is too embarassed to talk about it?
 
2005-01-05 04:43:42 PM
good ridance to him
 
2005-01-05 04:44:24 PM
hes a freakin magician...put his ass on a street corner in iraq and make him work against the defecit...
 
2005-01-05 04:44:28 PM
The farker who submitted it, got it redlighted, submitted it again, got it green lighted, submitted it....

Aw hell. Just give it a rest already!
 
2005-01-05 04:44:38 PM
I blame alien hookers...
 
2005-01-05 04:44:50 PM
He's a heterosexual with a moustache...
How could anyone trust him?
 
2005-01-05 04:45:16 PM
...and he's not pregnant with twins, either.
 
2005-01-05 04:45:20 PM
Authorities have been informed of his " fujitive status."

Brilliant spellers and minds at Fox.

/Fuji makes nice cameras.
//Deserters make poor citizens.
 
2005-01-05 04:46:18 PM

"Marine originally thought kidnapped, not kidnapped, beheaded, not beheaded, deserted, not deserted, now being charged with desertion is now missing"


#1 in how to tell if your prostitute is a whacked out AWOL Marine.

 
2005-01-05 04:46:19 PM
They were idiots to give the guy a farking leave from base since he knew they'd lock him up as soon as he returned. Unreal. Desertion is a major offense--I'd have run off, too.
 
2005-01-05 04:46:20 PM
Gee I can't understand how he got away. Wow. Gee whiz, not a chance he's being tailed. Naw. They can triangulate some dumbarse with a laser pen but ole Abdullah Wahhabi Snowjabbi just tells the family he's headed to the QuickieMart for a pack of smokes and poof he's gone.

I suspect our guys know his whereabout but choose to let this rat bastard lead em to bigger fish.
 
2005-01-05 04:46:50 PM
What a flake.
 
2005-01-05 04:46:54 PM
I'm betting he comes up un-missing in about 15 minutes.
 
2005-01-05 04:48:20 PM
This is what we get for having Ayrabs in the military.

I keed, I keed
 
2005-01-05 04:48:56 PM
geez.. this guy is such a media whore... just like Paris Hilton
 
2005-01-05 04:48:56 PM
Whats the nearest embassy to West Jordan Utah? Park City have a consulate?
 
2005-01-05 04:49:00 PM
not this siat again
 
2005-01-05 04:49:05 PM
Maybe he got kidnapped again?
 
2005-01-05 04:49:22 PM
Maybe he's on a coke binge with our president. (Sorry someone had to say it.)
 
2005-01-05 04:49:57 PM
what about the grandmother with the 'tied tubes' not pregnant then pregnant and then NOT pregnant again ....

?!?!

doesn't THAT count for ANYTHING anymore ??

( oh, by the way, looking for Muhammed? go to JORDAN, where he surfaced LAST TIME. )
 
2005-01-05 04:50:51 PM
This guy reinvents himself more often than Cher and Madonna combined. Impressive.
 
2005-01-05 04:51:37 PM
Colgate
Abdullah Wahhabi Snowjabbi

Funniest thing I've read all day. Kudos.
 
2005-01-05 04:52:22 PM
Sonuva...get back here you little bastard!
I almost don't care anymore whether he's charged with a crime, so long as we figure out just what the crap happened.


Loveless
He's a heterosexual with a moustache...
How could anyone trust him?


What, you think this face is untrustworthy?



Sean: "Oh, my bad, you wanted a HETEROsexual."

 
2005-01-05 04:53:16 PM
Colgate:
What bigger fish? Are you implying there is a ring of military deserters he belongs to?
 
2005-01-05 04:55:57 PM
What bigger fish. Well let's see. He's been known to do photo shoots with guys who have a penchant for ski masks and head lopping.
 
2005-01-05 04:57:21 PM
This guy need to get a reality TV show with that lottery winner from W VA.


Who wouldn't watch that?
 
2005-01-05 04:57:34 PM
Hassoun also was charged in December with loss of government property

Holy crap! Does Halliburton know that this is a criminal offence?
 
2005-01-05 04:58:08 PM
So, now that he's skipped out on his the military commitment he signed up for, he's qualified to be President of the United States. For the Republicans at least
 
2005-01-05 04:58:24 PM
If it is linked to an Alien Abduction, then I suggest a check be made for any Cartman like probe within this lad.

Maybe someone who thought the coke binge comment was just so witty, it begged to be said would want to volunteer, moustache or not.
 
2005-01-05 05:00:23 PM
Perhaps another John Lindh waiting to happen?
 
2005-01-05 05:03:46 PM
He should be executed.
 
2005-01-05 05:04:20 PM
its author was an Arab, as lying is a
very common propensity with those of that nation.

-don quixote
 
2005-01-05 05:05:10 PM
I predict he will next be seen in a new Paris Hilton sex video.
 
2005-01-05 05:09:28 PM
I think we should just kill the guy before this damn cliche catches on.
 
2005-01-05 05:11:40 PM
I wouldn't want to be that Marine in Iraq either. Friendly fire, anyone?
 
2005-01-05 05:12:28 PM
Why do I get a sneaking suspicion that this guy is a double agent of sorts working as an American soldier but a pipeline of covert operations for Al Queda???

Anybody else get this same sense?

Either that or the military really needs to put one of those ankle tracking devices used on house arrest criminals on ole Cpl. Wassef Ali Hassoun to keep track of him.

Anybody with an Arabic background working as a soldier in the U.S. military that suddenly disappears either is kidnapped by the terrorists or is working for them. I KNOW this is going to get me toasted on here, but am I the only one seeing this? Okay what comes next is a proposal so please no flaming me.

Wouldn't it be prudent for the U.S. military during this sensitive time to ask Arabic-American soldiers to leave the service until after this little war with Al Queda is over? For their own safety as well as the soliders who could be targeted for mass slaughter by internally placed bombs or frag grenades, poisoning, etc... by double agents who have infiltrated the U.S. military? Not an internment but enforced layoff of sorts until the situation eases off.
 
2005-01-05 05:16:46 PM
BeerNut nailed it. That guy should have been executed long ago.
 
2005-01-05 05:17:56 PM
Ninjawitch

Why do I get a sneaking suspicion that this guy is a double agent of sorts working as an American soldier but a pipeline of covert operations for Al Queda???

Because you read a lot of Tom Clancy?

He might just be crazy.
 
2005-01-05 05:18:11 PM
 
2005-01-05 05:18:32 PM
I think we should just kill the guy before this damn cliche catches on.

Cliche that was used, caught on, re-used, used again, and again, misused, used ad nauseum, is cool, not cool, cool, then not cool again. Stay tuned for updates.
 
2005-01-05 05:21:22 PM
has this guy ever been photographed together with Arafat?
 
2005-01-05 05:24:04 PM
werekoala - no, but he was photographed shaking saddam's handing and soliciting an oil pipeline and chemical weapons.
 
2005-01-05 05:27:14 PM
Screw this guy, shoot him on sight.
 
2005-01-05 05:31:30 PM
You all are going to feel pretty bad if it turns out he really was kidnapped this time.

Really.
 
2005-01-05 05:31:57 PM

When, specifically, is a Farker allowed to declare a thread winner? It doesn't say anything about it in the FAQ and I think that cryinoutloud just did...

So do we all take turns or what?

 
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