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(Omaha World Herald)   Man kills himself with chain saw during arrest   (omaha.com) divider line 176
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32768 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Dec 2004 at 5:58 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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jonathanjo
2004-12-22 06:17:01 PM
thermodie

Ooh, what an honor! Btw...

1. Here's a capital L for you: L

2. You connect two independant clauses with a semicolon, not a comma

3. Your = belonging to you
You're = you are

4. ",,,," -- what's this? Do you mean "..."?

All in just one line of text! You get the prize.
 
RoscoePColtrane
2004-12-22 06:17:02 PM
The guy was sawed himself because the cops kept mispronouncing "Poulan".
 
Fark It [TotalFark]
2004-12-22 06:17:46 PM
Did anyone else laugh at the headline?
 
Homercles_cares_not_for_beans
2004-12-22 06:17:50 PM
 
RoscoePColtrane
2004-12-22 06:18:16 PM
take out the word was
 
jonathanjo
2004-12-22 06:18:27 PM
The last thing they heard him say: "Don't laugh, you're next!"
 
lostcat
2004-12-22 06:20:21 PM
Maddox needs to add that to his "How to Kill Yourself Like a Man" essay.
 
God-is-a-Taco [TotalFark]
2004-12-22 06:21:29 PM
The man was holding a running chainsaw and they shot him with a high-velocity beanbag gun designed to drop people. Obviously the man committed suicide and it wasn't police stupidity. Hooray.
 
Aj611661
2004-12-22 06:22:32 PM
Kill Yourself With a Chainsaw

Manliness: 9
Style: 2
Awesomeness: 10
Mess: 10


Result: Pirate through and through
 
bigjoel
2004-12-22 06:22:44 PM
Fark It: Did anyone else laugh at the headline?

I'm sure someone did.

/testing the "farkit" extension.
 
officer_Crabtree
2004-12-22 06:22:44 PM
I have a question.... it says in the article that he got hit by the beanbag and then lowered his neck onto the chainsaw. So did he lower his neck because he thought "well fark this for a laugh" or because the beanbag hit his head so it forced him onto the chainsaw.

Am I making sense?

\not probably
 
Mob Barley
2004-12-22 06:22:56 PM
One less hick.
/does it matter how you go anymore? The Grim Reaper is so busy these days, Ive seen some photos of Iraqi kids that put this death in the pleasant catagory.
 
marleymaniac
2004-12-22 06:23:03 PM
What happened to the firearm man, a lot easier and quicker.

I wonder if the cops told him, "Hey man, don't lose your head over this."
 
Do the needful
2004-12-22 06:24:11 PM
He be headed for some trouble.... Fo sho..
 
Pilate
2004-12-22 06:24:37 PM
I lived in Grand Island from May-November for my internship. Definitely a strange place. I guarantee more than half the population is Mexican. I have no idea why they are there but they are and they are numerous.

/not sayin there's anything wrong with Mexicans, I'm just sayin....
 
thermodie
2004-12-22 06:25:18 PM
johnathanjo: its clear you can read what i wrote so since i didnt write it in complete english your i.q. must be about 210. now if you could just count my balls and get the same number twice it will be confirmed that you can sit next to albert einstein.
 
SeANMcBAY
2004-12-22 06:25:18 PM
Haha. That reminds me of this Live Journal I saw from SA.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/_countdown/
 
DocRoberts
2004-12-22 06:25:26 PM
In death he became more of a redneck than ever before.

/best I could do
 
marleymaniac
2004-12-22 06:25:28 PM
Jonathanjo

Damn english teacher. ITS CHRISTMAS BREAK, TAKE A BREAK.

The internet, allowing and excepting typos since 1973.
 
MrBobTV
2004-12-22 06:25:33 PM
When he refused, an officer fired a nonlethal "beanbag" round at Smidt

I'll bet he never SAW that coming!
 
McDork
2004-12-22 06:25:46 PM
I did that exact same thing with my vibrating Mach 3 once.

Well, without the cops showing up, barricading myself in the bathroom, being shot by a beanbag gun, and the part where you die.

Other than that, exact same thing.

/got nuttin' else
 
Chain
2004-12-22 06:26:21 PM
Some people will do anything to avoid going to jail. Uselessjunk.com has a video of a guy who shoots himself in the head while awaiting questioning in the precinct's interrogation room. Cop was lucky he didn't decide to go all postal on his arse first. Dummy should've searched him better. After all he was arrested for shooting a cop.
 
lostcat
2004-12-22 06:26:56 PM
Pilate

They are called "laborers." They are the ones who harvest all the food that we eat, at wages lower than most Americans would deign to give their children as an allowance.
 
vorstryke
2004-12-22 06:26:58 PM
Thread is useless without pics?
 
therecksays
2004-12-22 06:27:35 PM
I dunno if I got shot in the beanbags I might want to cut my head off.

/Nuthin
 
Major Thomb
2004-12-22 06:29:31 PM
That's almost as bad as they guy that got his head stuck in the elephant's ass.
 
refarkedbeans
2004-12-22 06:30:57 PM
People will do anything to avoid going to jail? I want to see some statistics.

People that will do anything to avoid going to jail: 30%
People that will do anything to get out of jail: 70%
People that will do anything to get good sex: ??

As we all know, my statistics are made up and do not matter but someone needs to find this stuff out, for real!
 
WyattEarp
2004-12-22 06:31:40 PM
Thats "Scarface" hardcore!
 
LincolnLogolas
2004-12-22 06:32:46 PM
That guy had one hell of a criminal rap sheet. Good riddence to bad rubbish, I just wish he didn't have to get the police involved. How the heck do you deal with something like that, mentally? How do you deal with watching someone cut his throat open with a chainsaw, intentionally? I feel sorry for the cops who had to witness that.
 
somecat65
2004-12-22 06:36:07 PM
"an officer fired a nonlethal "beanbag" round at Smidt, who then lowered his neck onto the chain saw, "


Yeah ok....i believe that...
 
Jeremy_M
2004-12-22 06:38:27 PM
oh you could kill yourself with just about anything...I mean, if you really cared enough.
 
gorgor
2004-12-22 06:39:44 PM
 
harrycary
2004-12-22 06:40:10 PM
lostcat:

lostcat

They are called "laborers." They are the ones who harvest all the food that we eat, at wages lower than most Americans would deign to give their children as an allowance.


do you really think crops are harvested by hand? maybe those of the roadside vegetable stands but most crops are done by machines. you should see the size of the farms here in NE. and mostly corporate owned.

how very ignorant of you.

hispanics are amassing in the midwest due to the abundant meat packing plants. it seems these plants are everywhere in the midwest. the pay is good for this area($10-12+hr to start)but it's not uncommon to hear of a company being busted by the INS for illegals. They just get deported and come right back.

i believe this guys' death is supsicious to say the least.

i find it odd that i learn of this story on this website. i read the omaha world herald and didn't see this story or hear about it on TV.
 
MorteDiem [TotalFark]
2004-12-22 06:41:47 PM
Traditional Irish Folk Song - Denis Leary

They come over here
And they take all our land
They chop off our heads
And they boil them in oil

Our children are leaving
And we have no heads
We drink and we sing
And we drink and we die

We have no heads
We have no heads

They come over here
And they chop off our legs
They cut off our hands
And put nails in our eyes

O'Grady is dead
And O'Hanrahan's gone
We drink and we die
And continue to drink

O'Hanrahan
No O'Hanrahan

They buried O'Neill
Down in country Shillhame
The poor children crying
And fe dee din de
Hin fle di dinfle
Di din fle de din de
In hey bibble bibble
Hey bibble bibble
Hey fle bibble de

O'Hanrahan
No O'Hanrahan

We drink and we sing
And we drink and we sing
Hey!

We drink and we drive
And we puke and we drink
Hey!

We drink and we fight
And we bleed and we cry
Hey!

We puke and we smoke
And we drink and we die
Hey!

/felt obligated
 
jonathanjo
2004-12-22 06:42:13 PM
marleymaniac

Jonathanjo

Damn english teacher. ITS CHRISTMAS BREAK, TAKE A BREAK.

The internet, allowing and excepting typos since 1973.

The other guy flamed me, so I was just opening a can of smart aleck on his ass. Ignore at will.
 
thermodie
2004-12-22 06:46:46 PM
yeah marleymaniac give the idiot a break.....lmao j/k dude
 
Axion22
2004-12-22 06:48:51 PM
Well with that list of warrants this guy served himself justice. Nothing better than keeping the courts clean.
 
saboisgod
2004-12-22 06:49:37 PM
2004-12-22 06:07:43 PM xJoe


Maddox approves


Thats the first thing I thought of too...
 
Luchador de la Calle Dos
2004-12-22 06:53:01 PM
 
MaxPowers742
2004-12-22 06:53:19 PM
See! In a world without guns no one gets hurt! Wait...

So he's wanted for possessing a firearm (etc.) and barracades himself up with a chainsaw?!
 
keg_monkey
2004-12-22 06:54:47 PM
multiple charges including burglary, first-degree false imprisonment, making terroristic threats, being a felon in possession of a firearm, violating a protection order and stalking

Out on Parole???

parole board: Are you remorseful?
con: Yes.
parole board: Well okay then.

/close enough
 
steppenwolf [TotalFark]
2004-12-22 06:54:47 PM


Soon to join in the annals of chainsaw history.
 
saboisgod
2004-12-22 06:54:49 PM
Axion22-
except for the part with the grand jury being called by state law to look into situations where a suspect is killed in police custody or while being apprehended (which he was). So, no, he didn't really save the courts any time or taxpayers any money...

/just sayin...
 
Cyanna
2004-12-22 06:55:18 PM
Yay!

/wish more criminals would take their own lives
 
Pav
2004-12-22 06:56:02 PM
I wonder what that kid was Shamoken. Can I get some over here?
 
wheatstalker
2004-12-22 06:56:13 PM
filthydigital wins
 
jspenguin [TotalFark]
2004-12-22 06:57:09 PM


Best Weapon Ever.
 
MadWeasel
2004-12-22 07:00:36 PM
He didn't stumble or fall on the chainsaw....Riiiiiiight...You guys keep tellin yourselves that. ;)
 
sn0wsuit4
2004-12-22 07:04:00 PM
"Custodian to the washroom for a wet cleanup please...Custodian to the washroom please..."
 
STRYPERSWINE
2004-12-22 07:04:33 PM
Ted Nugent was seen snickering.
 
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