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(CNN)   Scientests can clone you, but your clone will be a lard ass.   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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7105 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Feb 2002 at 5:00 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

42 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-02-28 05:02:15 PM  
Scientests? You're fired! ;)
2002-02-28 05:03:14 PM  
You mean a BIGGER lardass.....
2002-02-28 05:03:31 PM  
Does that mean if we clone a fat person we're going to get one of those people that Richard Simmons needs to remove from a house with a forklift?
2002-02-28 05:03:48 PM  
That fat rat on tv was funny.
2002-02-28 05:05:05 PM  
What if I'm allready a lard ass?????????????
Then what..???...?..........
2002-02-28 05:05:17 PM  
here's what i want to know...

if i am cloned, what is my clone's lifespan? Would he retain my memories? If the lifespan is greater than what i have left and he knows what i know, heck go for it, i can always go to the gym
2002-02-28 05:06:32 PM  
This just in:
Human cloning already out of control in America
2002-02-28 05:07:11 PM  
Good thing GWB is banning cloning in America. As if we don't have enough of an obesity problem here...
2002-02-28 05:09:32 PM  
Man, and if my clone grows up in California, he'll be really fat unless they pass that soft drink tax!
2002-02-28 05:11:02 PM  
this looks like more than just being a fattie. it looks like problems with the metabollism of clones. not a small problem.
2002-02-28 05:11:38 PM  
So clones are fat.

And Indiana is full of fat people.

MMMmmmmm.....OH MY GOD!

2002-02-28 05:12:22 PM  
Imagine a bunch of obese Britany Spears clones running around singing at Disney World.
2002-02-28 05:14:01 PM  
So, baisically you are saying that if I am cloned, that my clone will be the EXACT same as me? (Lard ass)

2002-02-28 05:14:11 PM  
it's probably the damn soda.
2002-02-28 05:21:57 PM  
That article was a funny as a bucket of pelicans!

Sorry, I'm trying to jump-start the new saying...
2002-02-28 05:24:16 PM  
So start off with someone anorexic...DUH!
2002-02-28 05:33:53 PM  
.....story 'sez that some cloned animals had oversized organs.......John Holmes was a clone!!!!??

put me in for a bucket of pelicans....original recipe....!!
2002-02-28 05:36:07 PM  
So if they clone Callista Flockheart, will she appear to have an "average" female body type?

-he who stacks pork
2002-02-28 05:42:33 PM  
zzzing, Leopold!
2002-02-28 05:47:18 PM  
rootdkj:... are you serious..or joking?....

a cloned organism grows from birth just as you did....its not much different in theory than a test tube baby except the scientists use DNA that was replicated from another no retained memories...and personality would be somewhat different as influenced by environmental factors....
2002-02-28 05:48:09 PM  
Spealing of FAT... Is it just me or is she looking good these days?

[image from too old to be available]
2002-02-28 05:51:31 PM's just you...well, maybe good for her
2002-02-28 05:56:20 PM  
A perfect match!! Who could have imagined?
2002-02-28 05:57:46 PM  
i think it's just that sultry, "got a cigar?" look on her face.
2002-02-28 06:02:57 PM  
I think I've got my clone's ass.
2002-02-28 06:09:13 PM  
what is my clone gets a lifetime of free arby curly fries?


"it's godzirra!"
2002-02-28 06:12:52 PM  
My clone isn't fat though. He's just a little chubby.
2002-02-28 06:17:11 PM  
more clones more fat people
more fat people more richard simmons
oh the humanity 8(
2002-02-28 06:18:14 PM  
Go ahead with Elvis. Oh and remember to stock up on the nutri system...
2002-02-28 06:22:10 PM  
So, does this mean that the cattle industry will jump on this new technology? Just clone a cow, then clone that cow, etc... Before long you'd be breeding cows that were just giant balls of unprocessed beef.

Mmnn... Beef.
2002-02-28 06:30:52 PM  
They're not-- they're just big boned!!
2002-02-28 06:37:15 PM  
LOL.... funny comments guys
2002-02-28 06:39:40 PM  
well there go my plans on living forever...

(I was kidding)
2002-02-28 07:08:18 PM  
2002-02-28 07:41:49 PM  
Well it only makes sense that clones would have slow metabolisms. Who wants to guess they have a higher risk of cancer, too?

-Hmm, I grow something out of context from a tiny strain of DNA and then I'm surprised when it gets slightly bigger than I want it...

Ever seen indigenous American plants that have been planted in African soil? They're farking HUGE.
2002-02-28 07:53:36 PM  
But there are clones. Natural ones. They are called identical twins.

Do scientists compare comparisons of the DNA of identical twins to the comparisons of the DNA of clones? Did that make any sense at all?
2002-02-28 07:55:45 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

How about a clone of a clone of a clone.
2002-02-28 08:00:16 PM  
Lazy mice! Get a job!
2002-02-28 08:26:41 PM  
My clone would have to be a lard ass...
2002-02-28 08:41:38 PM  
I'm holding out for a world like in "Sixth Day", especially with the helicopters.
2002-03-01 12:17:40 AM  
Oh Fark! I think I'm a clone now!
2002-03-01 12:34:33 AM  
voice of science:
when scientists use the word 'clone' they do not mean what you think. Clones do NOT share 100% of the original's DNA. Identical twins do, clones don't. Clones only share nucleic DNA. There is also another type of DNA, (proportionately a very small amount) called mitochondrial DNA which occurs outside the nucleus, has a different replication cycle and has a different structure-more similiar to bacterial DNA. Mitochondrial DNA seems to control metabolism to a degree. Thus it is not surprising that clones have farked up growth problems - their nucleic DNA is dividing and replicating okay, but something is going funky with the mitochondrial DNA. When 'cloning' is done nucleic DNA is inserted into the empty nuclues of a donor cell, so the clone has the donor's mitochondrial DNA, and the original's nucleic DNA.
/voice of science
I know you all care.
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