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(Some Guy)   Stupid Human tricks   (voiceone.com) divider line 57
    More: Dumbass  
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10607 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Feb 2002 at 9:17 PM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2002-02-27 09:18:47 PM
last
 
2002-02-27 09:19:44 PM
Sort of the short story equivilant of the Darwin Awards. Cool!
 
2002-02-27 09:23:54 PM

Can you make it any bigger?
 
2002-02-27 09:24:32 PM
OOps, had height and width reversed, guess you can add me to their list =(
 
2002-02-27 09:24:49 PM
Could someone read those and point out the funny ones to me. OK. Great. Thanks.
 
2002-02-27 09:27:06 PM
Headline should read : Encyclopedia of Urban Legends.
 
2002-02-27 09:28:36 PM
Half of those are from the Darwin Awards anyway.
 
2002-02-27 09:28:54 PM
It's on the internet...it MUST be true!
 
2002-02-27 09:31:06 PM
I;m skeptical at these... but people are just so stupid, that I'm willing to bet money that they're true.
 
2002-02-27 09:31:11 PM
getting killed while skiing is always funny
 
2002-02-27 09:31:23 PM
Headline should read : Encyclopedia of Urban Legends.

Thank you, I thought I would be the only one to think that.
 
2002-02-27 09:32:45 PM


Can we talk about my widdle puppy instead?
 
2002-02-27 09:37:43 PM
Sure Messy, tell us about da' puppy...
Looks like he's still got those sharp widdle puppy teef that hurt when he bites your thumb.
 
2002-02-27 09:40:24 PM
debuff of the first one


...the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing all potential sources of ignition - lights, power, etc.

After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked.

Witnesses later described one of the technicians reaching into his pocket, and retrieving an object that resembled a lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away...

OK, so it was dark and the explosion sent pieces 3 miles away. How were the witnesses close enough to see the lighter retrieval and survive the massive explosion?
 
2002-02-27 09:40:44 PM

haha !! you guys see this one.... real or not, it's funny..

"[AP, Cairo, Egypt, 31 Aug 1995 CAIRO, Egypt (AP)] Six people drowned Monday while trying to rescue a chicken that had fallen into a well in southern Egypt. An 18-year-old farmer was the first to descend into the 60-foot well. He drowned, apparently after an undercurrent in the water pulled him down, police said. His sister and two brothers, none of whom could swim well, went in one by one to help him, but also drowned. Two elderly farmers then came to help, but they apparently were pulled by the same undercurrent. The bodies of the six were later pulled out of the well in the village of Nazlat Imara, 240 miles south of Cairo. The chicken was also pulled out. It survived.

 
2002-02-27 09:40:53 PM
put a </i> after ....
 
2002-02-27 09:42:49 PM
"Calcutta, India - A tiger killed one man and mauled another at the Calcutta zoo yesterday when they tried to put a marigold garland around its neck in a New Year's greeting. Prakesh Tiwari, the dead man, and Suresh Rai had been drinking before they bought the floral garlands and crossed the moat around the tiger's enclosure, authorities said.

"I was shocked to see the two young men weaving about in front of a tiger with garlands in their hands, " said Rakesh Banerjee, who witnessed the attack that triggered panic and a near stampede in the zoo.

The men, both in their 20's, were trying to put the garland on a 13-year old male Royal Bengal tiger named "Shiva" after the Hindu god of destruction. When Rai threw the garland around Shiva's neck, the tiger attacked him. His friend Tiwari intervened, kicking the tiger in the face. The tiger released Rai, and attacked and killed Tiwari.

"I saw it all; the tiger turned and jumped on the other young man and put its head on the man's neck, and within moments, the man was apparently dead, his head dangling, " Banerjee said."

So, the Tiger's name, Shiva-God of destruction, didn't tip these guys off?
 
2002-02-27 09:43:44 PM
So this is the source of every single stupid farking email I get from newbie internet user idiots all day. Someone should shut this site down. Lack of references to news articles and excessive details not usually included in news reports prove these are bullshiat.
 
2002-02-27 09:44:10 PM
Ok that last one had an AP reference. Most didn't.
 
2002-02-27 09:44:23 PM
A middle-aged gentleman (name withheld to protect the ignorant), accidentally shot himself to death in December in Newton, N. C., when, awakening to the sound of a ringing telephone beside his bed, he reached for the phone but grabbed instead a Smith & Wesson .38 Special, which discharged when he drew it to his ear. (1992)

How does one know he thought he was answering the phone when the only one with this knowledge is dead?
 
2002-02-27 09:46:09 PM

lmao !! for ya cannucks out there, you'll like this one....

"This is a transcript of an actual radio conversation of a U.S. naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.

Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.

Canadians: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the south.

Americans: This is the Captain of a U.S. Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS MISSOURI, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE U.S. NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!

Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your Call."

 
2002-02-27 09:47:57 PM
Anyone have an update on how many times Drew has been assfarked in jail?
 
2002-02-27 09:48:48 PM
Just goes to show-

No matter how many big-ass warships you guys may have- you'll STILL have to bow to our lighthouses.
 
2002-02-27 09:48:50 PM
Drew's not there yet. He goes on the first.
 
2002-02-27 09:49:38 PM
"It's funny," said one companion, "Cos when he was young he put on his sister's underwear. But he died like a man."
."


Says it all right there.
 
2002-02-27 09:49:52 PM
Thanks for the info.

I was hoping we'd get to see pics of him squealing like a pig sooner than that.
 
2002-02-27 09:51:10 PM
Azninski, 30, had been drinking with friends when it was suggested they strip naked and play some "men's games".

WTF?? At first I thought I had accidently stumbled into some sort of gay porn site.
 
2002-02-27 09:51:40 PM
It's all a bit too Snopes for my liking
 
2002-02-27 09:52:25 PM
"Tech Support: "What does the screen say now?"
Person: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support: "Well?"
Person: "How do I know when it's ready?""A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St. Louis, but by the time police arrived on the scene, fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to complain of whiplash injuries and back pain."
 
2002-02-27 09:53:49 PM
Well, he's 7 weeks old, and his name is Max. I picked him up at the pound after finding his picture on the local animal shelter website. He is part Rottweiler (bites a lot), and part Labrador (very playful). This is NOT a good combination.

Max had 4 brothers at the shelter as well. Unfortunately, I live in a 2 bedroom condo, so I couldn't take all the little rugrats home with me.

Max just got over a mean case of Kennel Cough (doggy brochitis), and I've finally gotten a full nights sleep. That's about it.

1041225617655221.jpg
 
2002-02-27 09:57:03 PM
Witnesses later described one of the technicians reaching into his pocket, and retrieving an object that resembled a lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away.

Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion.

The technician that was suspected of causing the explosion had never been thought of as "bright" by his peers.


Darwin award!!!
 
2002-02-27 09:59:30 PM
Still nope.

But if you like the tech calls, look here:

http://rinkworks.com/stupid/

(Sorry, I don't know how to hyperlink)
 
2002-02-27 10:02:05 PM
Hah, this one is worth reading. I love my two dollar bills.
 
2002-02-27 10:03:56 PM
Most retarded urban legend ever:

"Several years ago, in a west Texas town, the employees in a medium-sized warehouse noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing all potential sources of ignition - lights, power, etc.

After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked.

Witnesses later described one of the technicians reaching into his pocket, and retrieving an object that resembled a lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away.

Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion.
"

Ok, so if witnesses could see the technician reach into his pocket, how did the witnesses magically survive the same explosion which obliterated the technicians?

That page sucked.
 
2002-02-27 10:04:57 PM
oops, should've read the previous comments before posting. Sorry!
 
2002-02-27 10:06:05 PM
Tegro: That reminds me of that story that came out shortly after Bush Jr. "won" the election. Apparently someone printed off a $200 dollar bill with Bush's face on it. The most worrying thing about this about this story is that some people actually accepted the note. Oh well.. there's one born every minute....
 
2002-02-27 10:08:06 PM
Magnet Trick Lands Pervert In Jail

SAN FRANCISCO, California - 45-year-old suspect, Harold White has been charged with one of the more bizarre crimes to hit this unusual city. He has been charged with disturbing the peace with a high powered magnet! It seems that White would stake out piercing parlors thereupon following women who recently had body parts pierced. He would then get close to them with his magnet in an attempt to "sexually stimulate" his victims with the magnet


Is that a magnet in your pockeyt or are you happy to see me? Its a magnet, but you'll be the one whose happy....
 
2002-02-27 10:19:35 PM
Well, as long as nobody gets away with one of these...
 
2002-02-27 10:20:30 PM
So back in High School, I didn't smoke pot (still don't) but my girlfriend at the time did. I get a phone call that she's been busted for posession, and since she's 18, she's in jail for the night. Scared (for her) and worried, I sit down on the bed and flip on the TV. Some stupid FOX show, "America's Dumbest Criminals" or something like that.

Never before or since has the God of Irony dick-slapped me so hard.
 
2002-02-27 11:13:03 PM
"Ban walking sticks in wilderness. Hikers that use walking sticks are more likely to chase animals."

hehe
 
2002-02-27 11:49:03 PM
w00t!

Heh, some are funny, you have to admit. I'm always surprised at the stupidity of people.

Also, snopes is a terrific site. I recommend farkers check it out before mass forwarding e-mails they get.
 
2002-02-27 11:50:14 PM
It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing from the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows opened it wouldn't have been fatal but the man was shut up in his near airtight bedroom. He was "...a big man with a huge capacity for creating [this deadly gas]." Three of the rescue workers got sick and one was hospitalized.


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
 
2002-02-28 12:05:20 AM
No reason for this at all.

 
2002-02-28 12:08:42 AM
'A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him.'

Stupid, but I bet it worked beautifully. I doubt anyone else in the store moved an inch after that.
 
2002-02-28 12:21:41 AM
Actually some funny stuff here. I don't know what anyone would complain about when it comes to this link. There is some funny stuff here IMO.
 
2002-02-28 12:27:58 AM
This is great. Some classics and some stuff I've never seen before. "War With Alaska" never fails to amuse me.
 
2002-02-28 12:34:43 AM
As reported in the New York Daily News, Saturday, November 8, 1997: PHILADELPHIA, Pa. - A woman is suing the pharmacy that sold her a popular contraceptive jelly because she ate the stuff on toast and got pregnant anyway.

Bwahahaha
 
2002-02-28 01:24:02 AM
Messy
Could someone read those and point out the funny ones to me. OK. Great. Thanks.

Now see, I would, and I would be sarcastic in doing so, if you didn't have such a cute dog pic in your bio.

Awwwwwwwwww
 
2002-02-28 05:37:36 AM
Joshua Marete Mutuma, 32, was arrested in Modesto, Calif., in November on suspicion of impersonating his wife. Mutuma's wife had a restraining order against him, and Mutuma arrived at the courthouse dressed as a woman with a long black wig and 5 o'clock shadow, attempting to have the order dismissed, and responding to the clerk's questions in falsetto.


hehehehe
 
2002-02-28 05:40:10 AM
Hehe...John Smoltz....
 
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