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(AP)   Apparently, Pittsburgh is just one big urinal. "Potty Police" aren't going to take it anymore   ( divider line
    More: Asinine  
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7034 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Dec 2004 at 5:39 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

93 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-12-07 10:40:36 AM  
Great, just what Pittsburgh needs... to be known as a town full of piss. Manhattan smells far more urine-y than the South Side in Pittsburgh. Hell, downtown Pittsburgh smells more like piss than the South Side. Cheesus!
2004-12-07 11:04:15 AM  
Got to admit the south side does not smell urine-y, although to be fair I thought Pittsburgh smelled better with that rotten-egg sulpher smell from the steel factories. Those days are gone however.
2004-12-07 11:20:46 AM  
I've said it before when Pittsburgh and Stink come up in the same thread - I lived in Pittsburgh for 5 years, and aside from the commercial districts with restaurant waste and bums, the town doesn't smell like much of anything. Where I lived was sandwiched between two big, wooded parks, so that neighborhood smelled mostly like trees.
2004-12-07 11:23:00 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Unavailable for comment.
2004-12-07 12:12:17 PM  
Another urine thread? Sweet.

/had asparagus last night.
2004-12-07 12:40:35 PM  
Honest officer, it wasn't Me, it was that little prick in front of Me.
Want me to rough him up?
2004-12-07 02:24:20 PM  
Apparently, so is florida.

And the police help.

2004-12-07 05:44:49 PM  
speaking of the southside... i'll be practically living there this weekend.

cant beat a midget pouring shots

/pitt student, not worried about finals
2004-12-07 05:44:57 PM  

Wonder why he's scowling like that?
2004-12-07 05:45:19 PM  
An Idaho paper with a Pitt. police story? I dont get it? Can someone fill me in?

/thinks its a fake
2004-12-07 05:45:31 PM  
I lived in Pittsburgh for 4 years, and for once I'm not going to flame it... but having partied in SouthSide a few times, someone has to tell the bars there that if you have a bar that can handle 300 people DON'T HAVE ONE FREAKIN' TOILET. Sheesh.

/NYC does NOT smell like old pee when it's under 40 degrees
2004-12-07 05:46:38 PM  
"It's a target-rich environment."

In other words, there's a lot of people who piss all over the place.

/hates how cops talk
2004-12-07 05:47:00 PM  
I hope it was an elevator with carpeting, otherwise it sloshes all over your shoes.
2004-12-07 05:47:29 PM  
By the way, if they caught me I'd be pissed!
2004-12-07 05:48:44 PM  
hehe, I went to college in pittsburgh. I peed all over that city!

/pees all over DC now.
2004-12-07 05:48:47 PM  
Squirrel Hill Downtown Pittsburgh smells more like urine than a boiling pot of urine.
2004-12-07 05:49:44 PM  
"piss on those cops!"

Farking club owners need to install more bathrooms! Nobody would pee outside if the bathroom lines did not have 50 people waiting for 2 whole tiolets. I spend far too much time inside of bars in line waiting to pee when I could be BUYING MORE BOOZE OR BEER. More bathrooms = people like me buying more beer.

Are the potty police going to cite people walking their dogs too? After all the dog is urinating on bushes and businesses same as people do, and dogs do this DAILY!

/my neighbors dog will be doing some hard time very soon
2004-12-07 05:49:54 PM  
But someone could get uromicitisis poisoning and die!
2004-12-07 05:50:19 PM  
Squirrel Hill

I lived in squirrel hill! Up on Wightman street, between wilkins and forbes. Whee!

/Misses it.
2004-12-07 05:51:06 PM  
Go Steelers.
2004-12-07 05:54:19 PM  
The H Factor -
"An Idaho paper with a Pitt. police story? I dont get it? Can someone fill me in?"

We do tend to get news about what's going on in other parts of the country here in Idaho you know. Why hell we just got rid of the Pony Express last month and are now using the telegraph. Really moving up in the world over here.
2004-12-07 05:55:01 PM  
South Side smells like rotting piss.

With the economy of South Side being 99.1% bars (can't forget Dr. Talarico the Chiropractic, the Dairy Queen, Fat Heads, The Bee Hive, and the Rex Theater) the rest of the area is a urinal.
2004-12-07 05:55:02 PM  
2004-12-07 05:56:46 PM  
Shouldn't this be OBVIOUS?

Go Browns.
2004-12-07 05:58:00 PM  
Southside bars are usually packed, and they're right about having one damn toilet. Downtown doesn't smell that uriny though, only in certain spots.

/Duquesne student
2004-12-07 05:58:52 PM  
Irish Lad

We do tend to get news about what's going on in other parts of the country here in Idaho you know. Why hell we just got rid of the Pony Express last month and are now using the telegraph. Really moving up in the world over here.


Iowa just got something called electricity, sure makes cookin' up the biscuits a lot easier.
2004-12-07 05:59:51 PM  
Go Browns... if by browns you mean STILLERS!!!!!
2004-12-07 06:00:00 PM  
One of my friends would do this all the time, even when the restroom was free. In the South Side, they also have an awsome self cleaning restroom for a quarter.

Downtown smells much worse then the Southside...
The area smells a heck of alot better now then it did ten years ago.
2004-12-07 06:00:15 PM  
There's a defense of "necessity" to most crimes. Seems to me that if you were about to piss your pants you could argue that. Of course, good luck convincing the judge to acquit you, when they want the $300 from every sap who comes through there.

Never been to Pittsburgh. I once in a drunken moment pissed on a London street, and the next day was amazed I wasn't immediately jailed, since they have the most camera-happy city on Earth. (Also grateful my small penis was not posted on the internet for British amusement.)
2004-12-07 06:00:43 PM  
I live in Pittsburgh and I have one question: Why does downtown smell like burnt toast on most days? I'm talking down by Fifth Avenue Place all the way up Penn and Liberty. I don't get it.

/Have never pee'd in the Sahhside, n'nat
2004-12-07 06:02:47 PM  
You can piss all over Pittsburgh, but it's still smells better than Cleveland.
2004-12-07 06:04:48 PM  
When I was a kid we went on a trip to Pittsburgh, righ in the middle of a sidewalk downtown, someone unloaded the biggest shiat I have ever seen.

/will never go back
2004-12-07 06:05:04 PM  
Speaking of smells and Pittsburgh, anyone who lives there want to send me a Primanti's sandwich?

Now THAT'S one rank, delicious Pittsburgh smell.
2004-12-07 06:08:36 PM  
On a recent Friday night, Turko and Weger saw not one, but three women crouched alongside a sport utility vehicle in the parking lot of a bank frequently used as an outdoor toilet.

"All right, ladies. Police," Turko said.

"What the hell is going on? Who the hell are you?" asked Melanie Kloba, of Export, Westmoreland County.

"Police. You're being cited for urinating in public," Weger said. "We could be taking you to jail."

Good Lord that reads like an excerpt from Bukowski! Hilarious...
2004-12-07 06:09:00 PM  

I noticed that too, never figured it out. Thought it was the coffee house in market square but it wasn't it.
2004-12-07 06:12:49 PM  
Just another reason to hate the South Side. Other reasons include all of the frat boys and skanked out Pitt students that seem to be glued to the bar stools in that neighborhood.
2004-12-07 06:13:18 PM  
I'll bet you can do this in the UK as long as you buy a license from the government.

/goes off to watch some tv. without a license.
2004-12-07 06:13:39 PM  
2004-12-07 06:19:48 PM  
C'mon People, it's East Carson Street.

About 5 miles of bar after bar after bar and only 2 bathrooms.
2004-12-07 06:20:54 PM  
Nothing like more good news for Pittsburgh. The bathrooms at Jacks are s**tty, Nick Fats city is always crushed. For a better time, go to the strip district. (no, no strip clubs there worth mentioning, just better bars/clubs)

My town does rule. Bad press sucks.
2004-12-07 06:21:41 PM  
Manhattan smells far more urine-y than the South Side in Pittsburgh.

Hear! Hear!
2004-12-07 06:22:04 PM  
not strange that it reads like Bukowski, Lace Valentine - South Side is home to more than a few ersatz Bukowskis...

/misses Pittsburgh, but likes my new digs in the PacNW.

/the burnt toast smell is probably the iron mill pollution osmosing out of the brick & stone of those old buildings.

/re Manhattan's aroma - the WTC subway station would still smell like pee even at absolute zero.
2004-12-07 06:23:33 PM  
There's a defense of "necessity" to most crimes. Seems to me that if you were about to piss your pants you could argue that.

No there's not. Not unless you argue that someone was mugging you and you peed in self-defense.
2004-12-07 06:25:14 PM  
when you got to piss, you got to piss. i've pissed in resteraunt parking lots before. just got back from the strip club, had plenty to drink. me and my buddies decided waiting till we got inside was too long.

one of the best parts about being a man is the world is your urinal.

'en yins drink too much aiern city you'll piss in the streets an'at.
2004-12-07 06:25:31 PM  
If a cop catches you peeing in public you get a fine. If a cop catches you peeing your pants, you'll probably end up in the drunk tank or at Western Psych. I'd take the fine.
2004-12-07 06:26:15 PM  
I wonder what Myron Cope has to say about this
probably incohent rambling
2004-12-07 06:29:07 PM  
You think the Potty Police are bad? Wait until you see the shiate Sheriff.
2004-12-07 06:30:41 PM  
I live on Sarah Street and have actually chased a few pissers away from my house - which obviously means I'm getting old, since I used to piss with impunity on the South Side from about age 19 on ... still love the neighborhood though, pee and all. Have some Jet fan friends coming in for the game this weekend - can't wait to show him how real football fans get down ...
2004-12-07 06:33:06 PM  
I've spent a lot of time in Pittsburgh, but I can't say I've ever pissed on the street in South Side. Maybe on the street on Oakland, though I don't remember it too clearly.

However, the most memorable piss I ever took in Pittsburgh was in the sink in the janitor's closet in a CMU dorm.

Good times...
2004-12-07 06:38:23 PM  
About asparagus and pee:

I knew asparagus made your pee yellow, but I didn't know it made your pee smell like asparagus. I was given a jar of homemade pickled asparagus spears by a friend, and I decided to be polite I'd choke one down in front of him and try to pretend I liked it. I found out that I didn't have to pretend, it was frigging delicious! I ate the whole jar in about two hours.

Then I moseyed into the bathroom (this was at work) and started to pee. I felt like someone concentrated about a thousand tons of asparagus into one drop and squirted the drop into my nostrils! The stench was so intense I almost passed out. People who walked in turned aroung and walked out fast. People who were sitting on the toilets taking a crap started gagging at the smell of my pee. It was incredible. A few minutes later I walked by and someone had put an "Out of Order" sign on the door.

Farkin' A, I wish I had another jar of those things...
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