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(Cosmiverse)   Web rage is sweeping the nation   (cosmiverse.com) divider line 139
    More: PSA  
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10475 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Feb 2002 at 10:46 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2002-02-25 11:30:45 AM
THIS IS THE POLICE! PUT DOWN THE KEYBOARD AND STEP AWAY SLOWLY FROM THE COMPUTER!
 
2002-02-25 11:31:07 AM
WOW!!!

something I can relate to!!!!!
 
2002-02-25 11:32:57 AM
Web Rage is the result of Fark posting political articles with a forum in which to discuss said article. So you should be saying "damn you Drew Curtis's Fark!" not "damn you the internet!"
 
2002-02-25 11:33:24 AM
When I first got into this internet thing in about '96, it was on a 25 mhz 486 with a 2400 modem and win 3.1. THAT will teach you humility. I'm only on a 550 mhz 56k now but I'll be content and happy until I can afford DSL.
 
2002-02-25 11:34:16 AM
 
2002-02-25 11:34:29 AM
This is Al Gore's fault.
 
2002-02-25 11:38:39 AM
Web Rage: defined best by your coworkers walking by your cube just as you accidently click on a veiled Goatse link. Not a pleasant thing to happen.
 
2002-02-25 11:40:35 AM
Seven percent of people polled said they hit their equipment. Four percent pound on their desks, and two percent admit to being so infuriated by their Internet experience that they've actually hit the person sitting next to them.

7 percent? 4 percent? Those are the kind of numbers you get saying "Unsure" when you ask "Are you right or left handed" so I wouldn't take this too seriously.
 
2002-02-25 11:43:01 AM
The Web gives me a mildly pleasing tingle without any bitter aftertaste.

Rage? Gosh no. Ohmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Whoever invented those "windowless" pop up ads that dominate the screen can eat my ass, however. I got their rage right here.
 
2002-02-25 11:44:46 AM

If this movie were made today, I'm sure there would be a scene with a computer.
 
2002-02-25 11:44:56 AM
Luckily, spanking it like a monkey 24/7 keeps me calm
 
2002-02-25 11:47:11 AM
Fb- is the father?
 
2002-02-25 11:49:35 AM
Hairy palms yet?

I never get raged by the internet, unless I lose my connection in the middle of something constuctive, like Boobie gatherin' :)
 
2002-02-25 11:51:38 AM
"Four percent pound on their desks, and two percent admit to being so infuriated by their Internet experience that they've actually hit the person sitting next to them."

BWAHAHAHAHA
 
2002-02-25 11:52:05 AM
Things I hate:

Kitties
Puppies
Fatties
People who hate fatties
People who say they hate fatties but are themselves fat and are just hiding behind the alias
Farkers
Whiners
Happy people
Teenagers
Old people
The Middle Aged
Women who won't go out with me
Lemurs
People who like Keats
Fb-'s kids (the legitimate and illegitimate ones)
PEOPLE WHO TYPE IN CAPS
Pepul who cain't spel
Hypocrites
Pron sites with adult check
The overly serious
People who write lists of things they hate

GOD it all makes me SO FARKING MAD!!!
 
2002-02-25 11:59:39 AM
Torchsong Why do you do it then?
 
2002-02-25 12:01:16 PM

With all due respect to JOHNDX, chicken rage!


 
2002-02-25 12:04:38 PM
20/20: You are so right. If "Office Space" is the passive aggresive approach to alleviating office rage, then "Falling Down" is the psychopathic meltdown approach. Great flick.
 
2002-02-25 12:04:46 PM
I am outraged that there hasn't been a boobies link yet today.
I'm gonna go kick the shiat out of a co-worker.
 
2002-02-25 12:05:49 PM
aggressive. Sorry.
 
2002-02-25 12:06:33 PM
Blue Max Hell, I stole that from someone else, ahahaha still funny, eh?
 
2002-02-25 12:07:33 PM
Still funny, every time.
 
2002-02-25 12:08:51 PM
Clarkins I agree, there's this guy here at work I've been looking for an excuse to kick the crap out of him, think I'll go Fvck with him.

NEED BOOBIES!
 
2002-02-25 12:09:20 PM
I love Falling Down. D-fense!
 
2002-02-25 12:10:58 PM
 
2002-02-25 12:11:26 PM
GOD DAMN THIS PIECE OF shiat, MOTHERFARKING PIECE OF DOG TURD WANNABE PENTIUM III! WHOS ASS AM I GONNA KICK TODAY YOU LOUSY, NO GOOD CO-WORKERS!!

Now, what are they ever talking about?

Seriously, if you ever hit your computer b/c the page isn't downloading fast enough OR hit someone else there is a good chance you are a bit too tense. Forget about taking a walk. do us all a favor and run in front of a moving bus you loser.
 
fj
2002-02-25 12:16:33 PM
Time for a web rage surf-by
 
2002-02-25 12:17:57 PM
Clarkins No shiate, I'm enraged too about all this stupid crap posted today, waiting for somthin good or some boobies. I guess I'll go give some waitress a hard time at lunch today.
 
2002-02-25 12:18:44 PM
Just a matter of days before someone knocks someone off and uses "Web Rage" as his/her defense at a trial....
 
2002-02-25 12:23:56 PM

Okay, a good one for web rage people that can't kick anybodys' ass but there own........

 
2002-02-25 12:25:10 PM
Mark Gorkin pisses me off.
But lemurs?
You gotta love lemurs.
They rule the world, you know. Well, they did.
 
2002-02-25 12:27:15 PM
 
2002-02-25 12:32:53 PM
JOHNDX You are a sick monkey, bad sick monkey!!
 
2002-02-25 12:35:02 PM
The easiest way to avert web-rage is to call your IT support personnel and tell them to go fark themselves.

Take a deep breath.

You are now cleansed.
 
2002-02-25 12:39:13 PM
JOHNDX:

Dewd...that r0x0rz.

Since all I have to do is remember dialing up the local BBS's with a 1200 baud...even on the slow days I can take a deep breath and rememember that.

Web Rage for me comes with sites that have a billion pop-ups. Like warez sites and mp3 sites and stuff. Especially when they pop one up after I close all the windows.
Or, like in certain game sites who use pop ups to accumulate monetary reimbursement...not only is it the fact that they're using pop-ups, but they've got them programmed to pop-up in an area of the desktop, where the x is hidden off screen. So I have to physically drag it over with my mouse, thus granting it more attention than I would like to in the first place.
Or the pop-ups with the box on the screen instead of the x lke all the rest that say "Don't like this pop-up? Close the window!"
I was happy with the X. Why complicate things? Ah well.
It's just sites left that are obnoxious and slow because people love billions of graphics that move, and they don't know feng shui for the goddamned desktop.
 
2002-02-25 12:43:06 PM
or the ads that have absolutely no way to close them except to close your browser through task manager. Musiccity should be shut down just cause they have those.
 
2002-02-25 12:46:55 PM
Oh gawds...I thought the headline was Web RAPE was sweeping the nation....

I was just getting ready to turn my computer off and hide!

-Da Lupe
 
2002-02-25 12:48:07 PM
*takes a bow*
 
2002-02-25 12:51:08 PM
Is that really a problem in PA?!?!?! dudes raping dudes?!?!!?!
 
2002-02-25 12:53:30 PM
Maybe he's in prision
 
2002-02-25 12:53:32 PM
STUPIDEST

STORY

EVER
 
2002-02-25 12:54:34 PM
A 13 year-old boy comes home from school and his mom
asks how his day was. He replies, "I had sex with my
teacher today."

"Oh my god! You get to your room! Wait till your father
comes home!!!", says the mom.

Awhile later the father comes home and the mom says,
"Go up to your son's room and talk to him. He's been
really bad today."

Dad goes up to the son's room and asks why mom is so
mad. "I told her I had sex with my teacher today," replied
the boy.

"Alright! That's my boy!", says dad. "Ya know son, women
just don't think like men. But I'm proud of you. What
are you now, about thirteen, right? Wow. That's my
son! Ya know what? I'm so proud of you I'm gonna take
you out and buy you that new shiny bike you've been
wanting!"

So the dad and his son go out and buy the nicest, reddest,
shiniest bike in the whole town. "You gonna ride it
home son?" asks dad.

The boy replied, "Nah, my ass is still sore."
 
2002-02-25 12:54:41 PM
Or maybe he's in prison
 
2002-02-25 12:56:32 PM
JOHNDX,
How about that FLA Chickie pic.? Don't say I never put in a good word for ya.

Anyways, you mutha fuggers that piss me off are lucky that murder isn't legal. You know who you are.
 
2002-02-25 12:57:34 PM
How are you supposed to complain to mamangement that you're getting frustrated waiting for a page to load?
"Uhm, Mr. Johnson?"
"yes, Wiggins? What is it?"
"Well, I'm feeling a bit tense. You know, frustrated.
"And why would that be Wiggins?"
"Well, I was sitting at my desk, waiting for a clip from Spredam Widelip's new triple penetration porn movie to download, and it took a really long tme. I mean, my hand lotion dried up. I punched Jenkins, but I still feel pretty angry."
"Wiggins, you're fired."
 
2002-02-25 12:57:42 PM


http://www.cosmiverse.com/newsimages/computerman.jpg

Even so, I bet she is hot.
 
2002-02-25 01:07:13 PM
No, I'm not in prison, I'm at my office....

Damn, same thing.

-Da Lupe.
 
2002-02-25 01:07:57 PM
SLAYERSWINE I'm keeping those pics as my very own to love and squeeze and *ahem* you know. And you put in a good word? That's not what she said. She was pretty leery of me. Tryin' to cock block bro?`;)
You're the one who had her all this time, being stingy! ha!

I'm surprised no one is fighting in this thread, it would be the perfect one for it.....Web Rage Aaaaaaaaah!
 
2002-02-25 01:13:06 PM
i have drunken rage. it's caused by beer.
 
fj
2002-02-25 01:27:53 PM
Most common cause of web rage:


no boobies
 
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