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(St. Petersburg Times)   Dumbass Dad that let son drive car while wearing Rollerblades gives investigators tour of house, bong found - hilarity ensues   (sptimes.com) divider line 67
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6804 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Feb 2002 at 6:07 PM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2002-02-22 06:09:30 PM
foolish I tell you.
 
2002-02-22 06:09:53 PM
REPEAT.
 
2002-02-22 06:10:08 PM
Oh, oops... follow up.
 
2002-02-22 06:10:37 PM
So when will his mug shot be on thesmokinggun....after all, it seems as though Florida is full of these druggie morons
 
2002-02-22 06:10:54 PM
He's a really bad role model, plain and simple.
 
2002-02-22 06:11:16 PM
No offense to Floridians of course.....
 
2002-02-22 06:11:41 PM
The sober ones.....or at least the ones that don't get caught
 
2002-02-22 06:12:20 PM
Deputies came to his house on Wednesday, Colbert said, to make sure the 7-year-old and Colbert's 3-year-old son were safe.

and where may i ask is the dumbass farkin mom in all this?
 
2002-02-22 06:12:35 PM
Somebody should give this guy his own tv show.
 
2002-02-22 06:13:34 PM
It's not a bong, it's a pencil holder.
 
2002-02-22 06:13:36 PM
""You can tell it hasn't been used in months," he said. "We don't do that. I just roll them up and go outside and smoke them."

..now THERE'S a statement any responsible father would make
 
2002-02-22 06:13:50 PM
Perfect time for.....
"Think about the children!!!!"
 
2002-02-22 06:13:55 PM
Sounds like my parents
 
2002-02-22 06:14:04 PM
Well, that guy is certainly not the sharpest tool in the shed... and notice they put his address in the article. We should send him cards.
 
2002-02-22 06:14:53 PM
I thought Jeb had 3 older kids? Not a 7 & 3 year old....
 
2002-02-22 06:14:59 PM
If you invite cops into your house and they find your bong then you don't deserve to have it !
This guy is a fuggin' moron to begin with. Give him some shock treatment. That might jolt his ass up !
 
2002-02-22 06:15:20 PM
"After the boy -- propped forward in the seat by a pair of inline skates -- ran into another car, Colbert took over the wheel and backed up to assess damages. Just then, deputies arrived and arrested him. They said he faced charges of driving drunk, habitually driving without a license and letting an unlicensed person drive."

So, the kid was driving but the man faces charges of DUI ANDletting an unlicenced person drive ???

Am I not seeing something ??

Hi My2.. :)

 
2002-02-22 06:15:21 PM
Metalstill My guess is she was at work... as a stripper or something.
 
2002-02-22 06:15:30 PM
I wonder how long it will take before this goes from a "stupid idiot man" thread to "Bash the cops for drug laws" thread.
 
2002-02-22 06:15:37 PM
You say that something's pinching at your feet
hey look what you just found oh aint that neat
it's my roach clip and my bong
they've been missing for so long
all this time they must have been beneath the seat
 
2002-02-22 06:15:40 PM
Hartfrog

Right now the Simpsons Prohibition episode is on, and yes, the "think about the children" line is in it.
 
2002-02-22 06:15:40 PM
This guy is hilarous. His comments have me rolling right now.

"You can tell it hasn't been used in months," he said. "We don't do that. I just roll them up and go outside and smoke them."

haaaaaa. he does need his own show!!!
 
2002-02-22 06:17:03 PM
Anyone think his street name "Smokey Lake Loop" is
 
2002-02-22 06:17:07 PM
Vegasj --

Yeah, it said he took the wheel after the kid backed into a car. So, double-whammy. The worst thing about this guy is his crushing honesty about what a dumbass he is - he didn't have to tell the cops ANY of this.
 
2002-02-22 06:17:33 PM
"He said authorities were looking for adequate food in his kitchen when he opened the cabinet above the refrigerator. He was trying to show them the rice and bean packages he bought in 1999 to prepare for Jan. 1, 2000. "

...nuff said.
 
2002-02-22 06:19:03 PM
Karmic Hoax: prolly show up in the Florida MugShot update
 
2002-02-22 06:19:08 PM
Hi Vegas...;-)


I agree with Slayer....I'm not a cop fan either, but if you invite them in and you're too retarded to hide your stuff, then you deserve what you get....although you might then be able to get out of the charge by claiming some sort of mental disability
 
2002-02-22 06:19:20 PM
Ah, yes, but he's smart enough to invoke the very powerful "Oh, that bong belongs to a neighbor whose house burned down" defense. Very clever, indeed.
 
2002-02-22 06:23:42 PM
Okay, we've got the electoral marathon, the shark attacks, the World's Stupidest Dad, the Elian Soap Opera...

Did I miss anything? Was the unused crematorium anywhere near Florida?

No wonder Jeb put it in a state of emergency....
 
2002-02-22 06:25:55 PM
Crematorium was in southern Ga., very close to the Florida border, and I believe some of the distressed family members of some of the deceased lived in Florida, Woody.
 
2002-02-22 06:27:52 PM
This is sad, not funny. Where does the hilarity ensues come from???? What dumbass wrote that headline?
I have nothing against smoking(I do it myself occasionally)or drinking. But please be responsible about it when you have kids.
 
2002-02-22 06:28:27 PM
He shoulda claimed it was the kids bong, then he woulda been off scott free.
 
2002-02-22 06:28:27 PM
Oh, yeah, WoodyTX, also, their electric chair doesn't work right and has propensity of getting too hot, not killing the person, and setting him on fire instead. The state has responded by not only not fixing the problem, but it now has the nickname "Old Sparky."

I wish that I was joking.
 
2002-02-22 06:28:56 PM
Hello Mytwocents, been a while again.
 
2002-02-22 06:30:29 PM
Nabb1,

No. The place is in North Georgia, right on the Tennessee state line. I live about 10-20 minutes from the place.
 
2002-02-22 06:32:52 PM
Dr.Pepper
Go kick his ass for me. Then go to the strip joint with a dirt and hay floor to tip the mom. She's the fat one missing a couple front teeth. (knocked out by the old man)
 
2002-02-22 06:36:50 PM
Cool, Time to go home. Think I'll go put down a 6 pack and go coach my son's little league team....Just kidding about the 6pack.
 
HPZ [TotalFark]
2002-02-22 06:38:58 PM
Bad_Sinfluence: Cool, Time to go home. Think I'll go put down a 6 pack and go coach my son's little league team....Just kidding about the 6pack.

Whew!! I'm glad you were kidding, Bad_Sinfluence! You should pick up a sixer before going to the game. Kids are no fun without booze!
 
2002-02-22 06:39:08 PM
Hey Bad_Sin..yea, just busy at work, lurking everyonce in a while though.... having barcode scanner problems currently

It's 80 degrees here today and tomorrow....time to lay out, no more fake & bake!!
 
2002-02-22 06:43:22 PM
I thought that place was in northern Georgia. Don't know why I remember seeing a map of that.
 
2002-02-22 06:44:12 PM
It's in the 80s here as well... kinda pisses me off. It's entirely too soon.
 
2002-02-22 06:47:29 PM
Wait Karmic Hoax, you're 'here' is my 'here'....!!


And yes, it pisses me off too, way to early
 
2002-02-22 06:56:23 PM
"Instead, they saw a glass bong -- a device used to smoke marijuana. "

Good thing they cleared that up for all of us out there in the world who have never been exposed to any knowledge whatsoever of pot.....
 
2002-02-22 06:57:51 PM
Karmic Hoax and mytwocents: sounds like here is here...
Winter ain't over yet. Must.....resist....hawaiian...shirts.
 
2002-02-22 07:01:18 PM
Now I'm starting to understand that whole confusing-Florida-ballot thing alot better.
 
2002-02-22 07:03:16 PM
How many people are here??
 
2002-02-22 07:04:11 PM
Yea, well, Not that I'm with the fashion police, but seeing as how I've been wearing skirts, short sleeves, and sandals all along anyway....I'm thinking fark the whole no white shoes thing, it's farking summer here
 
2002-02-22 07:04:26 PM
never mind... must leave now!
 
2002-02-22 07:16:48 PM
Chingador: Good thing they cleared that up for all of us out there in the world who have never been exposed to any knowledge whatsoever of pot.....

Odd you should mention... about 25 or so years ago my not-dead-then grandpa made the local paper, standing next to his garage door on which someone had spray-painted the letters "B O N G" on each of the four panels, overnight. He was at a complete loss as to its meaning, as the photographer and reporter made clear (and apparently could not assist). Fortunately, they ran his street address with the article, and some kind, young, local stoner soul sent him an anonymous two-page letter complete with his own artistic renderings of how to use a bong. I was too young at the time to corroborate its accuracy, but it was an amusing event to me nonetheless, and was nice to see members of the community care for each other like that.
 
2002-02-22 07:17:19 PM
Jeez.. This guy's an ideal role model.. I've never laughed so hard as when I did when he he mentioned that he doesn't use the bong but instead smokes joints. Was this how he explained things to police?

A fitting Simpsons quote that this guy probably used:

Homer: Well, wait a minute! OK, I'm not going to win "Father of the Year". In fact, I'm probably the last guy in the world who should have kids. I --

And further hillarity ensues.
 
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