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(CapAlert)   CAPAlert warns that "Return to Neverland" may cause kids to jump off of bridges   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
•       •       •

3419 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Feb 2002 at 6:02 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

77 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-02-20 06:04:02 PM  
the_marq warns that reading CAPalert will make you stupid.
2002-02-20 06:04:33 PM  
Holy crap a yellow! Maybe they're only talking about 2 foot bridges.
2002-02-20 06:05:26 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-02-20 06:05:49 PM  
This is a good thing. It's called Darwinism at work. We don't need these stupid kids, anyway.
2002-02-20 06:07:11 PM  
Well if CAP says so, I'm gonna lock up them kids and make 'em watch The Sound of Music for the next 10 years.

img.fark.netView Full Size
2002-02-20 06:08:06 PM  
Uh, why does he keep putting an asterisk in it? o_o;;

2002-02-20 06:08:08 PM  
Javaman: but you wouldn't want the kids escaping from the Nazis, would you?
2002-02-20 06:09:07 PM  
If kids start jumping off bridges because of a movie, then the Darwinists have already won!
2002-02-20 06:09:24 PM  
In other news, the Bible may cause your children to run around naked, fill the house with water, and nail each other to wooden crosses.
2002-02-20 06:09:31 PM  
Well, we can only pray...
2002-02-20 06:10:40 PM  
I'm sorry but according to CAP under Violence they listed:

a great jump to test ability to fly

I feel this obviously is a reason for the red light rating, I honestly don't know how in their right mind they listed this as a yellow light. Here you go farkers.

[image from too old to be available]

Kevin King
- CAP (Christians Against CAP)
just pretend the acronym works.
2002-02-20 06:11:26 PM  
RobbieFal: I hadn't thought about that. lol
2002-02-20 06:11:34 PM  
It's called thinning out the herd. Nothing wrong with it...
2002-02-20 06:12:05 PM  
2002-02-20 06:13:04 PM  
Wintermute: Let's not forget smiting and stoning, kids love smiting and stoning.
2002-02-20 06:13:14 PM  
I took my daughter to see it, on teh way home I ad this urge to drive off a cliff. Coincidence???
2002-02-20 06:15:34 PM  
"We (Jane speaking about herself and her mother) had a fight" when it was Jane doing the fighting."

GAH! The Impudence! The Hate!
2002-02-20 06:15:47 PM  
Heavens! An adult character in underwear! I don't want my children to know I wear underwear! *snort* My favorite: the quote "You'd be DING me a favor." (caps added)
2002-02-20 06:15:59 PM  
At least something to sue for
2002-02-20 06:17:23 PM  
CAPAlert warned me that viewing Butt Vengence 5 (The Reckoning) would cause me to drive a large truck thru a small tunnel.
2002-02-20 06:17:28 PM  
If I believed for one second that CAPAlert was for real, I'd jump off a bridge.
2002-02-20 06:17:44 PM  
Javaman: I would rather be stoned than smitten. Or is it smote? Meh... it's after 5pm, I shouldn't have to think....
2002-02-20 06:18:32 PM  
E-Sensei wrote: "At least something to sue for"

I would throw my kids from a bridge and then sue disney.. too bad I dont have kids.
2002-02-20 06:21:06 PM  
It's *obvious* that CAPAlert says that this movie might cause kids to jump of bridges?

I mean, obvious that they say it's bad or something, and that you shouldn't take your children to see it, sure. But this wouldn't occur to me. (Maybe if I had children...)
2002-02-20 06:24:30 PM  
Who let these people get a website?
2002-02-20 06:24:56 PM  
Skizza: CAP is for real. hope you have insurance.
2002-02-20 06:27:28 PM  
Can't we all just realize-that-Darwin-dude-was-as-
down along?
2002-02-20 06:27:57 PM  
This is a quote from the CAPAlert review of "The Tigger Movie":

"Tigger has a great fall off a very high cliff with no consequences much like the Road Runner(tm) cartoons which raised some concern regarding their violent influence. Further, Tigger ventured out on his own in a blinding blizzard to search for his relatives -- and the whole clan went after him."

Please someone tell me that this site isn't for real. Please.

There are only TWO films in CAPAlert history that have received a 100% Jesus rating: "Mary Poppins" and some obscure gobshiate callled: "Who gets the house".
The commentary on "Who gets the house" contains the line:
"I was the only one in the auditorium when I watched this movie."
Can anyone here come up with a reason why this might be so?

I'd love to meet the person who writes this crap, and I'd love to meet his children, Rodd and Todd. It's a frightening prospect, but Christian fundies can reproduce. God help us all.
2002-02-20 06:28:25 PM  
With my apologoes to RodneyKing...where are you dude? We haven't heard from you lately. Come back!!!
2002-02-20 06:29:58 PM  
That site is the biggest waist of space on the internet. I started laughing when i was reading the Black Hawk Down "review". That movie was exelent, and from what i think, your general viewing for your website are people that like to not let there kids do ANYTHING. I mean, Return to Never Land is a bloody (as in the british word) childerns cartoon. Now, Jackass might make kids jump off bridges, but not a kids cartoon. If some kid did this, he would have to be a dumbass.
2002-02-20 06:30:57 PM  
CrazyChimp: You could have broken that to me a little more gentley.
If I can't find a bridge, it'll be time to crack open the emergency Scotch and paracetamol
2002-02-20 06:38:32 PM  
Cap is user number 402 on fark, be afaid, be very . . .
ok stop the snickering right now
2002-02-20 06:40:26 PM  
Mary Poppins got 100? I figured anything original and fantasy based couldnt hit above 90, what a shocker
2002-02-20 06:51:50 PM  
"This is another of Disney's animation marvels. It is childhood fantasy of magic and adventure, strangely atypical of modern Disney-owned films such as Pulp Fiction..."

Pulp Fiction came out in 1994. To the CAPAlert guy, this is "modern".

Need I say more?
2002-02-20 07:00:31 PM  
If your kids are dumb enough to think that they can fly without pixie dust then they deserve to die.
2002-02-20 07:01:47 PM  
"And a child shall lead of a bridge."
- CAP 3:69
2002-02-20 07:04:37 PM  
Check out the John Q review:

Offense to God:
Yin yang on tee shirt

2002-02-20 07:06:32 PM  
Methinks this God fellow gets annoyed rather easily. He should lighten up a bit, a good way would be to spend less time with farking christians
2002-02-20 07:08:57 PM  
Right wing conservatism makes me want to do this...

[image from too old to be available]
2002-02-20 07:09:11 PM  
Josh_s08: biggist WAIST? Exelent? Ah, perhaps wasted. Excellent.
2002-02-20 07:10:50 PM  
No, not because they will try to fly...because the movie is THAT BAD.
2002-02-20 07:17:01 PM  
Amazing..absolutely amazing...such delicate sensablities these people have!
2002-02-20 07:25:33 PM  
Anyone else find it hypcritical theat Harry Potter gets a lower score than Lord of the Rings because its author isn't a Christian? Really, they both have the same themes going on...

I wonder how CAP would view Lord of the Rings after watching Bad Taste...?
2002-02-20 07:29:43 PM  
Another reason why all Christians should be banished from earth.
2002-02-20 07:33:56 PM  
And with left wing liberalism, they would simply ram the spike through your forehead. After all, a few eggs must be broken....blah,blah,blah.
2002-02-20 07:44:10 PM  
"Go ahead and run me through (sword stab). You'd be ding me a favor."

Ding? I can't believe they missed such a blatantly obvious sexual inuendo as that. RED!
2002-02-20 07:44:35 PM  
Fuxxor: Another reason why all IDIOTS should be banned from the earth.

If you believe these people represent the views of all christians, you ARE A DUMBASS. Just as the pope and Catholics do not speak for the whole of christianity, and how osama bin laden does not speak for all Muslims, neither do these idiots speak for all christianity.
Remember, it is not RELIGION that is bad. Religion is not a thing, it cannot be good or evil. The people that USE it can be good or evil. Well, three categories: Good, evil, or idiot. These people fall into the third category.
2002-02-20 07:50:09 PM  
Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.

My good character has been corrupted since I discovered this website!! These people are not dummies!!
2002-02-20 08:02:23 PM  
er...please don't lump john paul and catholics with fundamentalist terrorist groups.
2002-02-20 08:03:17 PM  
there is no good or evil.
only flesh.
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