Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Discovery)   Rat brain controls F-22. Alert level raised to DeCon 5   ( divider line
    More: Cool  
•       •       •

14383 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Oct 2004 at 11:56 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

92 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

2004-10-23 05:48:54 PM  
I'm fighting the urge to quote John Travolta in "Battlefield Earth."
2004-10-23 06:03:39 PM  
Fight it! Please!
2004-10-23 06:09:36 PM  
Here come the cymeks

/Butlerian Jihad
2004-10-23 07:01:09 PM  
Wait, isn't the F22 a fly-by-wire aircraft? I thought those were self-levelling... Any Raptor drivers care to comment?
2004-10-23 07:09:24 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-10-23 08:49:59 PM  
I always thought it would be kind of cool to have a monkey brain in a beaker full of bubbling liquid to power my workstation.

but now that I see a story of somebody actually doing something like that, well, it's pretty

[image from too old to be available]

2004-10-24 12:01:01 AM  
2004-10-24 12:03:03 AM  
DefCon 5 is actually the "all clear" threat level. DefCon 1 is total thermonuclear war. It's a countdown, not a count up.
2004-10-24 12:03:50 AM  
Anyone seen the movie Macross Plus? The YF-21 mind controlled plane?.. Good Stuff. And a question. Isn't decon 5 the lowest level kinda like terror alert level oscar errr.. green?
2004-10-24 12:04:08 AM  
Exterminate! Exterminate!!
2004-10-24 12:04:19 AM  
Defcon 5 is the lowest level of the scale.

Now did the submitter intend this as an indication that no one has anything to worry about? If that's the case:
/golf clap
Very subtle!
2004-10-24 12:04:48 AM  
DefCon 5 is the lowest threat level you ninny.
2004-10-24 12:05:05 AM
2004-10-24 12:06:25 AM  
Fnord: Wow. That's a lot of kaboom to put in the virtual hands of 25,000 rat neurons.
2004-10-24 12:07:24 AM  
and with these rat brain cells controling a
simulator in the lab, CHRISTOPHER REEVE might
have walked ..... so sad.
2004-10-24 12:07:39 AM  
Submitter is an idiot. Assuming you were trying to be funny, it's DECON, not DEFCON -- the rat poison. And DefCon 5 = okay; DefCon 1 = bad.

/going to go drink more
2004-10-24 12:08:37 AM  
But when does the brain start looking for Sarah Connor?
2004-10-24 12:09:00 AM  
"Give me Big Mac,
fries to go,
Give me Big Mac,
give me fries to go..."
2004-10-24 12:10:10 AM  
again, do scientists not watch anime?!? have they not seen MACROSS PLUS?!?!?!?!?
2004-10-24 12:12:54 AM  
By the way, any other farkers attending SfN 2004?
2004-10-24 12:14:05 AM  
Skynet has become self aware. In one hour it will conduct a massive nuclear attack on its enemy.
Rat [TotalFark]
2004-10-24 12:14:12 AM  
Rat's is smart.

© yup
2004-10-24 12:14:51 AM  
What could possi...




*no carrier*
2004-10-24 12:16:49 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Unavailble for comment.
2004-10-24 12:18:15 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Unavailable for comment.
2004-10-24 12:18:25 AM  
Hrm. I guess I should pay more attention. Silly filter I never noticed.
2004-10-24 12:18:54 AM  
Well, that was odd.
2004-10-24 12:20:31 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Ladies and gentlemen I'd like to welcome you to United 344 to Chicago from the beutiful ciciy of phoenix this evening. We're looking at a twenty minute wait taxing, then we're up on runway 37 left for immediate departure. We hope that you enjoy your fight with United, we know you have other choices and appreciate it that we won. My name is DTTX-prelease-sub-beat-^h09. I am an experimental neural net array grown from non0-desctript stem cells espcially for this purpose. I have logged 123,000 real flight hours and 448,780 simulated. You are welcome to come up and meet me but I'm afriad I'm rather a pink/greyish soup of neurons and neurotransmitters in a 2 gallon clear bucket. Please be respectful of the plane and its parts since these are my body. On that note, the restrooms are now open and I feel my gallies warming up due to autonomous hypothalamus control. Enjoy your flight.
2004-10-24 12:22:15 AM  
I really can't explain how freaky this sounds to me. It's just so out there. Is this for real? I can't honestly wrap my brain around how exactly this actually worked. Did you see the part about the brain cells forming their own neural networks?! That's just... man... wow.
2004-10-24 12:24:47 AM  
Before you yell at the submitter, I suggest reading tiiger's comment.
2004-10-24 12:25:03 AM  
Is Pinky the EWO?
2004-10-24 12:25:07 AM  
I purpose that we design these brains to drive foreign cars, because their owners aren't going too good of a job doing that themselves.
2004-10-24 12:26:43 AM  
Grant Morrison is a precog.

Someone google up an image from a comic called We3. My HTML sucketh.
2004-10-24 12:30:55 AM  
It's not even a brain -- it's cells in a petri dish. But it's still cool.

The F-22 is inherently unstable, as many modern fighters are, and that's deliberately designed in so that the aircraft will be more maneuverable. It's basically unflyable if the flight computer fails.

I wonder if they're using X-plane -- they're using a Mac running OS X from the looks of it and X-plane is dual platform. (I should know. I have a Mac and X-plane 7.)
2004-10-24 12:32:40 AM  
Hasn't anybody read any Cordwainer Smith?
2004-10-24 12:33:43 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

2004-10-24 12:34:37 AM  
Neural networks are interesting, but in their current state they're only useful for reactionary processing. That is, apply an input and you get a certain output. Its useful for certain applications (like automated motion control).

It isnt however, decision making intelligence. Its about as complex as an insect's behavior drive.

Still impressive though. The difficult part is communicating effectively.
2004-10-24 12:38:01 AM  
Ok let me get this straight.

We are going to grow artificial organic brains and put them in charge of machines. How is this not gonna backfire on us?

Do these people even WATCH movies? I could ask my 9 year old brother about this and he'd probably say it was a bad idea.

insert sarah connor/matrix cliche here.
2004-10-24 12:39:05 AM  
I am truly curious about how this works. What makes a pile of nearons desire to learn, and what can they truly know about how they are interacting in their enviroment? Anybody?
2004-10-24 12:39:43 AM  
You see, you see! The white man controls every thing. Sooner it'll be the brain of a black man driving a knight rider poolice car to descriminates against our people.
2004-10-24 12:40:34 AM  
This is the only bright spot in this post

[image from too old to be available]
2004-10-24 12:43:55 AM  
I'm calling BS on this whole article, like its an April Fool's joke or something. It actually quoted (paraphrased) "the brain can do a fligh simulator, and hopefully someday it can do something more complicated". WHAT?!? Have the editors ever actually tried a flight simulator? Please. The whole thing is BS.
2004-10-24 12:46:53 AM  
mycroft holmes
2004-10-24 12:46:58 AM  
TheWhiteDragon: *golf clap*

"Hard cheese for a hard journey!"

/probably misquoted, at work and away from my Sealab episodes
2004-10-24 12:50:47 AM  
Anyone else think of this when they read this:

p.s. If someone teaches me how to HTML this, I will.
2004-10-24 12:52:33 AM  
2004-10-24 12:53:54 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

I, for one, welcome our new synthetic-brain-controlled war-machine overlords.
2004-10-24 12:55:16 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
Also unavailable for comment.
2004-10-24 01:02:18 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Old news...
2004-10-24 01:03:26 AM  
I can't believe it hasn't been posted!


/could have submitted this with a *golf clap* funnier *golf clap* headline
Displayed 50 of 92 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.

In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.