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(ABC News)   Man doodles "Help me" on napkin while dining at Red Lobster, setting off frantic police search when busboy finds it. Having eaten there themselves, police file no charges   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
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10389 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Oct 2004 at 11:36 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

34 Comments     (+0 »)
2004-10-21 11:41:37 PM  
they didn't save the lobsters...

/i'm first!
2004-10-21 11:41:46 PM  
My dad used to write on the napkins at Kentucky Fried Chicken (things like "Help im stuck in a napkin holder!!")

Never got the police called though...
2004-10-21 11:41:58 PM  
"Help me. Please call police."? That's hilarious. I love to play that joke all the time. /sarcasm
2004-10-21 11:42:18 PM  
Farking thing tried to perform some scan of my comp when I closed the window; beware the pop-ups.

/Internet Exploder surrenders
//lame story
2004-10-21 11:42:31 PM  
Cannot connect, probably just me.
2004-10-21 11:42:53 PM  
"Help, I'm stuck in a napkin holder!!", now *that's* funny.
2004-10-21 11:46:10 PM  
Probably stems from a very bad date...
2004-10-21 11:46:21 PM  
"Coleman, search party of five..."

/badly paraphrased Mitch Hedberg
2004-10-21 11:47:29 PM  
"Help, I'm stuck in a napkin holder!!"

That's too funny. My nipples are hard from laughing.
2004-10-21 11:49:00 PM  
What a dumbass. He should have paid in cash.

I also got the pop up.

/at work
//no google popup blocker
///have to use IE
2004-10-21 11:49:19 PM  
Making fun of Red Lobster! Best chain restaurant ever!
2004-10-21 11:51:57 PM  
That's too funny. My nipples are hard from laughing.

That's happened to me a lot.
2004-10-21 11:52:00 PM  
I write farked up stuff on random items all the time.
2004-10-21 11:57:36 PM  

"Police have decided not to charge him. Still, Donlin says, while it's OK to have inside jokes, don't write anything that serious on a napkin."

"The waitress that is about to serve you has very nice boobies."

2004-10-22 12:01:25 AM  
Are they sure this man did it? I, for one, would be looking for a fly with a human head.

/Still remembers David Hedison, "Helllppp Meeee!" And Vincent Price with the rock.
2004-10-22 12:14:54 AM  
It was probably just some poor schmuck sick of listening to his in-laws. Not that I would know anything about that if my in-laws are reading.
2004-10-22 12:32:45 AM  
Backdoor Beauty??????
2004-10-22 12:35:08 AM  
I have a ex who waitressed at O'Chucks. I dropped her off at work the morning after our visit to the zoo. She was so taken by the monkey exhibit from the day before she doodled a few on a take-out carton and labeled her creation "The Monkey Family." Imagine her shagrin when the carton was inadvertantly given to an African-American family to box up their leftovers. She got to keep her job, plus a few days off(unpaid).
2004-10-22 12:40:39 AM  
"Help, I'm stuck in a napkin holder!!"

That's too funny. My nipples are hard from laughing.

I almost wet myself from laughing so hard. And both of you owe me a new keyboard.
2004-10-22 12:44:22 AM  
I was in a Chinese restaurant the other day and I reported to the cops a message I found in a fortune cookie that read, "Help! I am being held prisoner/slave in a Chinese fortune cookie factory!"
And the cops didn't do a farking thing!
2004-10-22 12:44:42 AM  
The crime alert level was first at Black Watch Plaid.

Then later is was raised to the level of the cover of the Rush album "Moving Pictures."

/Phil Ken Sebben
2004-10-22 01:19:26 AM  
Backdoor Beauty?
2004-10-22 01:21:20 AM  
Damn it, supaxi, didn't see yours. Must have been... an hour ago. Damn I'm slow

me = selfpowned
2004-10-22 02:10:23 AM  
I used to use a scanner to listen to voice pagers, and heard one once that said "HELLLP! HELLLP! I'm stuck in this guy's POCKET! Hellllp!" Most were very boring, but on weekends, you could hear some really crazy stuff.
2004-10-22 02:51:00 AM  
2004-10-22 03:25:28 AM  
Before my first trip to New England, my only lobster-dining experience had been at Red Lobster (Nebraska native, pretty far from the oceans of plenty). Red Lobster is ok I guess, but you have to laugh at those puny things they serve you after you've feasted in places along the eastern seaboard.
2004-10-22 04:26:50 AM  
He was probably in the middle of a bad date.

Add high-strung busboy...
2004-10-22 05:09:02 AM  

That's too funny. My nipples are hard from laughing.

don't make claims like that unless you have photographs to back them up.

/worried eok is a guy who actually has said photographs
2004-10-22 06:30:55 AM  
I find it funnier to leave shopping lists for the supplies to make a nuclear device in hotels :-)

1) Plutonium
2) Plastic Explosive
3) Kryton Initiators
4) Morally bankrupt nuclear technician
2004-10-22 08:29:39 AM  
What? No North Dakota jokes yet? Did people miss the fact that this happened in Bismarck, North Dakota? I can't imagine what people were doing eating at Red Lobster in Bismarck. I couldn't bring myself to trust seafood in Fargo, and certainly not Bismarck.
2004-10-22 08:51:54 AM  
Brian Friedkin

fnorgby much? :)

2004-10-22 09:37:57 AM  
My nipples explode with delight!
2004-10-22 10:39:30 AM  
Cereal Killer, you have now set new standards in the world of being a smart a55.

I think your dad is now an internet celeb.
2004-10-22 11:16:33 AM  
someone should post a pic of that guy from happy gilmore.

"wanna go to the red lobster"
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