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(ABC News)   Scientists try to get sharks to do it by playing Barry White really loud   ( divider line
    More: Ironic  
•       •       •

3313 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Feb 2002 at 11:25 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

54 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-02-14 11:26:29 AM  
2002-02-14 11:26:52 AM  
2002-02-14 11:27:54 AM  
As punishment they should have oral sex performed on them from a shark.
2002-02-14 11:30:16 AM  
This article would be hilarious if it even remotely resembled the headline.
2002-02-14 11:30:24 AM  
So they were just doing a "scientific study" to get mood music?
2002-02-14 11:30:34 AM  
Maybe the poor sharks just want some privacy...
2002-02-14 11:31:08 AM  
2002-02-14 11:31:11 AM  
First we have scientists studying the farking habits of Penguins, now they are playing Barry White for sharks to get it on. WHAT THE FARK are they wasting all that research money for, why - please someone tell me WHY.

*absolutely farking stunned
2002-02-14 11:31:26 AM  
:-) Good job, Saxmachine. And some day I'll learn to read articles before reacting to flamebait....
2002-02-14 11:32:04 AM  
Barry White is the Walrus of love, right??
Sharks are scared of walruses ............ can you see where Im going here folks?? The Tope was swimming round coz he was brickin it
Poor buggers.
Oh yeah, and the "scientists get fired" thing - has some of the story been deleted or something now??
2002-02-14 11:32:53 AM  
Maybe they should play Sharkbait instead.
2002-02-14 11:33:00 AM  
Should have been labeled "Stupid". Actually, I don't at all see how an "Ironic" tag applies at all.
2002-02-14 11:33:26 AM  
Whoever posted this should have at least read the article. This wasn't interesting at all. Perhaps if the scientists HAD been fired for having sex, then it would have been interesting. What's happening to Fark?
2002-02-14 11:33:26 AM  
funny headlines are great, but MISLEADING . . . i hate it when that happens
2002-02-14 11:34:28 AM  
Maybe Marvin Gaye would work better

Let's get it on...
2002-02-14 11:35:50 AM  
lemme try this:

Jeez, that is SUCH a misleading headline. i read the article and nobody got fired. gosh. that is so unfair. Fark is supposed to be a serious source of news and this just ruins fark's credibility. What is fark coming to. i think the person who came up with that headline should be drawn and quartered and the mod that ok'd it should be shot in the head. biatch biatch B|itch, Moan Moan Moan. Waaaaa
2002-02-14 11:35:54 AM  
I lost my virginity to "Take My Breath Away" by Berlin. That would probably work.
2002-02-14 11:35:56 AM  
It's always nice to have misleading headlines once in a while. You get to see who actually reads the article, and who is actually trying to get the f_irst p_os_t.
2002-02-14 11:37:16 AM  
whoa, i shoulda refreshed before i posted.
2002-02-14 11:38:14 AM  
The story itself is funny enough. Why the need to put the scientists getting fired in there? :P

2002-02-14 11:39:43 AM  
Jak, to Kelly McGillis? Were you wearing aviators and driving your hog? Where was Goose?
2002-02-14 11:42:20 AM  
LOL, you rule, 43%.

Anyway, funny ass headline. Neat story, too. Kudos.
2002-02-14 11:42:57 AM  
What about the penguins?
2002-02-14 11:43:16 AM  
They should have tried "Once Bitten, Twice Shy" by Great White.

Ok, that was lame.
2002-02-14 11:46:05 AM  
How about some sexual healing?
2002-02-14 11:47:08 AM  
Heck I though the story was funny without the
firing. But what do I know, I thought  this
was funny.
2002-02-14 11:48:57 AM  
Please tell me our tax dollars didn't go toward this study.
2002-02-14 11:53:36 AM  
I'd fark a shark. =)
2002-02-14 11:58:53 AM  
boy, some farkers are really hostile to science research (esp. BTEzra420). Not every bit of research is glamorous or saves the world. some is just done in the interest of advancing human knowledge. your homework assignment: familiarize yourself with the basics of the philosophy of science.

too bad they changed the headline. i was looking forward to more biatching.
2002-02-14 11:59:25 AM  
2002-02-14 12:00:08 PM  
Saxmachine: Seriously... This seems to be happening more and more on FARK these days... an article will have a halarious headline, then only ends up being half true...
2002-02-14 12:02:01 PM  
Hey, if Barry can sooth snakes, why not sharks?
2002-02-14 12:02:52 PM  
Boobies... sorry, I'm just testing the filter...
2002-02-14 12:04:46 PM  
Oberon: Goose offered $50 to watch but I refused. Then he died in that ejection accident...Damn, I should have let him have his little thrill. Good thing he's making good money as a doctor now.
2002-02-14 12:05:31 PM  
The sharks now crave Arbys roast beef, mmmmmmmmmmm.....
roast beef
2002-02-14 12:05:36 PM  
BTW, this story STILL isn't ironic.
2002-02-14 12:06:29 PM  
I agree with BTEzra420. STo0p1d ass research. Spend that money on something more useful than trying to get sharks to fark!
2002-02-14 12:12:09 PM  
This was on sfgate way back last yesterday.

I know cuz I sumitted it....dammit.
2002-02-14 12:12:47 PM  
Main Entry: iro·ny
Pronunciation: 'I-r&-nE also 'I(-&)r-nE
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -nies
Etymology: Latin ironia, from Greek eirOnia, from eirOn dissembler
Date: 1502
1 : a pretense of ignorance and of willingness to learn from another assumed in order to make the other's false conceptions conspicuous by adroit questioning -- called also Socratic irony
2 a : the use of words to express something other than and especially the opposite of the literal meaning b : a usually humorous or sardonic literary style or form characterized by irony c : an ironic expression or utterance
3 a (1) : incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result (2) : an event or result marked by such incongruity b : incongruity between a situation developed in a drama and the accompanying words or actions that is understood by the audience but not by the characters in the play -- called also dramatic irony, tragic irony
2002-02-14 12:20:08 PM  
Meanwhile, the "scientists" have all recently notified their spouces that they have been knocked up.
2002-02-14 12:34:49 PM  
irony can be so ironic
2002-02-14 12:37:00 PM  
2002-02-14 12:42:31 PM  
2002-02-14 12:52:14 PM  
Do you think when scientists get their research ideas from Old Simpson episodes, the world is about to end ?

Hey here's my research plan to see if sharks can "get it on": give the male sharks viagra and beer, the female sharks implants. I will conduct research, will cost at least 10 million. Please send money in unmarked non sequential bills to U-haul truck in parking lot. Thank you.
2002-02-14 12:57:47 PM  
Thanks Captain_Blasphemy!!!
2002-02-14 01:07:32 PM  
They forgot to put the gold chains around the male sharks' necks... (do sharks have necks?)

...maybe some edible shark panties for the ladies. Nah, that could get too freaky...
2002-02-14 01:39:11 PM  
do sharks get shrinkage? maybe they should research that since they seem to have so much time on thier hands.
2002-02-14 01:50:50 PM  
So "jumping the shark" is a good thing in this case?
2002-02-14 01:55:02 PM  
I woke up late this morning (don't ask why {yeah, yeah, I know, who gives a shiat about my life)}, saw this on CNN and just about cried laughin'. 'Til I realized this was my my tax dollars at work.

PS: Isn't there a picture of Sharks for photoshopping with this?

PSS: Did Billy Ocean or Teddy Pendergras have any comments? The Tuna?
2002-02-14 02:16:43 PM  
For any americans complaining about "My Tax Dollars", read the dateline:

B I R M I N G H A M, England, Feb. 13

The US Research was about using music to make fish grow faster and larger--a boon for fish farmers, and a way to increase the food supply. Happy now?
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