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(NCBuy)   Planet Hollywood worker reflects on celebrity hand job   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
•       •       •

57134 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Oct 2004 at 5:35 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

76 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-10-11 05:31:52 PM  
That headline was deceptive. I'm so disappointed.

Bensch also remembers seeing Jeff Goldblum in a "compromising position" because he had to stand on a chair with his butt in the air to get extra leverage because the clay was too hard.

Goldblum got even with him by watching him poop, right?
2004-10-11 05:35:08 PM  
I concur. Damn submitter got my hopes up. ;)
2004-10-11 05:37:50 PM  
Why did I waste my valuable 30 seconds to read that nothing article?
/and then waste time writing this?
2004-10-11 05:38:36 PM  
Submitter = Michael Moore
2004-10-11 05:38:37 PM  
Damn it.
2004-10-11 05:38:46 PM  
Fap Fap Fap Fa ---

Awwww, dangit.
2004-10-11 05:39:27 PM  
Was thing written for a Middle School paper?
Crap, pure crap.
2004-10-11 05:39:27 PM  
Thanks for nothing submitter.
2004-10-11 05:39:58 PM  
2004-10-11 05:40:12 PM  
Finger prints transfer in latex... a criminal sure could have fun with that. Or maybe hold onto them for the near future, when bank atm's are accessed using your fingerprint!!
2004-10-11 05:40:30 PM  
Nice try, submitter.
2004-10-11 05:40:54 PM  
Feh. Waste of a click.
2004-10-11 05:41:09 PM  
I was in the mood for a good sleazy story, DARN YOU SUBMITTER!
2004-10-11 05:41:20 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-10-11 05:41:25 PM  
That was the most blatant case of false advertising since my lawsuit against the movie "The Neverending Story"
2004-10-11 05:41:43 PM  
To be fair to the submitter, that was actually the title of the article...
2004-10-11 05:42:09 PM  
This non-article calls for an emu diversion.
2004-10-11 05:42:26 PM  
waste of a dick
2004-10-11 05:42:50 PM  
I know the headline was deceptive and the article sucked, but I think we've insulted the submitter enough. We don't want him/her to go kill him/herself.
2004-10-11 05:43:35 PM  
All i can say is that anytime I go to Plant Hollywood which is not very often I always order the L.A. Lasagna. mmmmmmm. Didn't they become bankrupt or someone bought them out. I forget what happened.
2004-10-11 05:43:53 PM  
This is by far the most disappointed I've ever been regarding a Fark article.
2004-10-11 05:44:01 PM  
Fair scmair, we've been hosed. Hosed, I say...hosed.
2004-10-11 05:44:21 PM  
2004-10-11 05:46:41 PM  
Then there was Dolly Parton who wanted to make a boob print instead of a hand print.
2004-10-11 05:47:07 PM  
Could I use the Dollie Parton boobie imprints to make my own silicone castings?

2004-10-11 05:47:17 PM  
Well *I* think it was very clever. Good job, submitter.
2004-10-11 05:47:35 PM  
In other news,

paint drys, grass grows and the sky is blue. So says cardboard factory worker John Doe. Stay tuned for details.

2004-10-11 05:48:02 PM  
Hey it wasn't a total waste of a click. We did learn that Angelina Jolie has "big, meaty hands." I guess that's why all the girls like her so much.
2004-10-11 05:48:46 PM  
Lot of pop-ups appeared. Ban the submitter.
2004-10-11 05:49:48 PM  
Great headline. All the disappointed Farkers checking in makes it that much funnier.
2004-10-11 05:51:47 PM  
you're partially correct. if you take an impression using alginate (the stuff dentists use to make molds of your teeth) there is certainly enough detail to make a latex copy of minute details like fingerprints. if they used clay like the article says, i doubt you could lift a print from that.

/the same thought crossed my mind
2004-10-11 05:53:08 PM  
Breech Birth

Welcome to spyware. Population: you.

/had to check in IE, thanks to my Firefox and proxy, which defeat all advertising known to man.
2004-10-11 05:53:18 PM  
This would only be interesting if the hands were cast in plastic and turned into serving bowls.

Imagine eating popcorn shrimp out of Denise Richards' plastic paws. Woofah.
2004-10-11 05:53:46 PM  
First I have to say that this makes the baby Jesus cry.

Second I have to say, why in the world would someone write an article like this? It's just a horrible article.
2004-10-11 05:55:23 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-10-11 05:55:30 PM  
You can lift a print from clay. But what I imagine they do is make a cast from the mold, sand it down to get rid of prints, make and sell molds of that.
2004-10-11 05:55:51 PM  
That was a yawner ...

2004-10-11 05:56:14 PM  
Bensch also remembers seeing Jeff Goldblum in a "compromising position" because he had to stand on a chair with his butt in the air to get extra leverage because the clay was too hard.

Who is this "the clay" you speak of?
2004-10-11 05:57:09 PM  
2004-10-11 05:57:39 PM  
Angelina Jolie has "man hands"?
2004-10-11 05:58:08 PM  
I think I'm somewhat disappointed. The only thing remotely funny about that article was that the submitter put the actual headline of the article in his/her link. Poorly written, boring article. Not Farkworthy, but hilarious in that the headline is real.
2004-10-11 05:58:43 PM  
wheels_999: We did learn that Angelina Jolie has "big, meaty hands."

Interestingly, GIS for "man hands" turned up this:

[image from too old to be available]
2004-10-11 05:59:03 PM  
So, like...

How would they take an impression of Gumby's hands?

Or Mr. Bill, for that matter?
2004-10-11 06:02:53 PM  
Hey, all of us in the US got a big Hand Job from Bush, Cheney and so on... it called a Rush To War.. yeah. we had to get in there and so many were excited.

This article was nothing, it was nothing at all. But, at least no one died from it..

Oh yeah, and Anne Colter.. helped with that hand job.. at least she's kinda cute so you might enjoy it.. at least a little bit...
2004-10-11 06:03:45 PM  
Someone please rescue this story with a picture of Uma Thurman's big meaty beautiful hands.
2004-10-11 06:04:47 PM  
When you go to work at Madame Tussaud's sculpting the department, your very first assignments are all hand jobs.

2004-10-11 06:05:48 PM  
(Take out the redundant "the". Add cowbell, or something.)
2004-10-11 06:06:35 PM  
Am I safe to assume that Paris Hilton is involved somehow?

/didn't read the article
2004-10-11 06:09:53 PM  
2004-10-11 06:12:07 PM  
This might be the only place (even here, semi-remotely related) place to share how Liam Neeson's hands look odd/creepy to me. I don't know why--might be the fingernails, might be the proportions of his hands...*shrug*

Another hand mention-- Julie Andrews' in The Princess Diaries. Looked old and oaken.

/feels knowledgeable like BubbaProg ;)
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