Bee very careful out there...

bees!

and so says there isn't a God...

Well I'll Bee Darned...

Q:Where do bees stick their stingers at night ?
A:In their honey.

Now FOX can go out and make a movie called Killer Bees. Wait, they already did.

"I saw her head filled with many bees inside her hair and she tried to get them off."

Head Full of Bees sounds like a band name.

"It Bees That Ways,Sometime"
--Joe Simon

Whatever happened to the killer bees that we were warned about a few years ago? Everyone was afraid they would come up from Mexico and start populating the US or some such thing. The article mentioned 'africanized' bees. Is that a killer bee?

The terrorists have already won.

Yes Africanized bees are "killer bees." They are a strain bred with normal bees that escaped from a laboratory in the late 1960s in South America, and have now made their way to the United States. You piss them off, and unless you are a fast runner, you're pretty much dead.

Navin: As far as I understand it, yes, africanized bees are killer bees.

At first I thought that said killer Bee Gees...my mistake. Maybe we should unleash killer bees on the Bee Gees, we've already gotten rid of that young one.

I pissed off a colony of "killer" bees and survived, but I pissed them off with a hommade fuel air explosive device made with 5 pounds of fine magnesium and 3 gallons of gasoline/styrofoam faux napalm. As I recall I wasn't stung once.

My father being a beekeeper in his spare time, I understand what bee-attacks really are. One time my moronic neighbor threw a ROCK at my bee hive, and you can only imagine what happened. I couldn't see his face and exposed flesh because it was so covered in bees. He was allergic to beestings as well. Farktard deserved it. Heehee, his face was SO swollen after that.

Eat More Possum: here in california, we're not smart, we're special!, now where is my short-bus helmet

Oh my god, for a second there I was scared, seeing a SF source for this story. They're still only in LA, so no reason to worry.

EVILSCIENTIST rules!!!

osama bee ladin

(pic please)

The Wu Tang Clan is striking the nation. The are Muslims and they are angry. shiat!1

. . shouldn't they be african-americanized bees?

Smack Johnson: it could be anthrax and public enemy

Rhadamanthus: I can't imagine there are a lot of people taking up beekeeping as a hobby any more--too much danger that these a**hole africanized beens will interbreed with their own before they realize it and BAM, it's bye-bye time.

That's exactly what happened to some old guy here in Long Beach a few years back--we had the "honor" of having the country's first official death by killer bees. The poor shlub was just mowing his lawn and his formerly-docile bees went off on him. Took him over a week to die.

I can't enjoy beekeeping exhibits at the county fair any more.

Damn bin Laden...his bee technology is centuries ahead of ours!

"¡Aye, no es bueno!"

Two slackers on cig. break outside a convenience store in a strip mall. Slacker1 takes a puff, looks up and sees a giant beehive attached to the building's facade over-hang.
He nudges slacker2 and gestures at the hive.

Slacker1: Hey dude, check this out.

Slacker2 gives an annoyed look back to Slacker1, looks up and shakes his head.

Slacker2: So?

Slacker1 runs back into the store and returns with a long broom.

Slacker2 shakes his head.

Slacker2: Dude, no!

Slacker1: Dude, yes!

Slacker1 holds the broom by the tip of the handle, raises it and tries to touch the hive but it is about a foot too short.

slacker1: Dude, check this out!

Slacker1 begins to jump as he makes swipes at the hive with the broom. His first two attempts are near misses.

Slacker2 nervously looks at the hive as he gravitates towards the store's entrance.

Slacker2: Dude, no!

Slacker1 (still jumping): Dude, yes!

Bees are starting to come out of the hive.
The broom makes SOLID CONTACT with the hive. It BREAKS. A third remains attached to the overhang and the rest plumets to the ground.

Slacker2 swallows hard.

Slacker1 smiles.

Slacker1: Cool!

Slacker1 walks towards the hive. The sound of LOUD BEE BUZZING stops him in his tracks. A dynamic cloud of blackness emerges from the hive.

Slacker1 appears mesmerized by the sight.

Slacker2 appears horrified. He runs into the store. He holds open the door and yells to slacker1.

Slacker2: Dude, C'mon.

Slacker1 appears not to hear him.

Slacker2: Sh*t!

Slacker2 slams the door and watches.

The bees cover slacker1 and begin stinging. He appers to be numb until they land on his face and he flails violently about, yelling profanities in pain. The cloud spreads out and others get stung and run for their lives.

The End.

"Ahhh! Covered in Bees!"

"I like my women like I like my coffee... covered in bees!"

Eddie Izzard, "Glorious"

I know...I know...obvious.

"What are you going to do, release the dogs, or the bees, or the dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you?"

I know someone said this in another thread, but it's almost on topic for this one

Best way out of a sticky situation like being stung hundreds of times by killer bees, is to eat them before they do you

rent "Wax"

Eat More Possum: yeah bees put out wanted posters. When I was a stupid 6-7 year old I didn't know that bees could build hives in the ground. I was walking through a blackberry patch behind a group of about 10 kids -- they walked side-by-side, I walked alone down the center. After stepping on the hive I got stung. I was 6, scared & stupid; I jumped up & down on this thing bringing out the swarm. I was stung about 25 times before someone pulled me away. Fortunately I don't remember it but my twin sister who saw me covered in bees for 5 minutes is still terrified of bees. Unfortunately I've been stung about 50 times since then -- I swear my picture has been digitially aged and remains in all bee post offices around the country. I've never done anything stupid like when I was 6 -- the farkers just seek me out for pain.