Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Yahoo) Boobies The reason why Miss Alabama is now Miss USA   ( divider line
    More: Boobies  
•       •       •

174211 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Sep 2004 at 1:08 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

298 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Newest | Show all

2004-09-19 06:46:55 PM  
For the record:

Miss USA is for profit and run by Trump, and is judged as follows: 1/3 interview, 1/3 swimsuit, 1/3 evening gown. Miss USA feeds into Miss Universe, also Trump owned. Most of the time when you see "Miss Country X", it means they're in the USA/Universe system. Unless they're in Miss World. Which is a whole other story.

Miss America is a non-profit, and the largest scholarship provider to women in the country. They've messed with the scoring system quite a bit, but it's interview, talent, swimsuit, evening gown, casual wear and a short onstage quiz. Contestants are required to have a platform, in which they do work towards a cause.

Miss Alabama won because she was consistant. She's been accepted to medical school and her platform is pediatric cancer. She won an award for doing the most towards her platform of any of the contestants. She had a toned body in swimsuit. Her gown was pretty decent. Her talent was on-key, if not a little boring. She did well in the quiz. She spoke with poise and humor. So she won.

Louisiana was beautiful. Plastic like a barbie though. She even wore pink for her little "dance". She did terribly on the quiz. I mean, really bad. I'm pretty sure her interview was good but probably not great. So, you ask, why doesn't she do Miss USA? She already did, but at age 18... and seasoned veterens always do better. But that's the real story.

As for me, I was rooting for California. The pic of her in this thread is the girl with the huge leg extension. They showed a clip of her dance and it looked fantastic. I think if she had made the top two (probably lost points in swimsuit for being short), she would have won. Tied with Alabama on the quiz, even. Oh well.

Miss America, incidently, makes about 200-250k during her reign from appearance fees. Not a bad job to have, but they travel constantly. It's an interesting job. Miss USA doesn't make as much, but gets an apartment in NYC for the year instead. Miss USA's in February. Tune in then if you want to see the wanna be models/strippers. :)
2004-09-19 06:54:27 PM  
So, you ask, why doesn't she do Miss USA? She already did...

There but for the grace of God, go I.
2004-09-19 07:01:12 PM  
I sorta dig Miss Conneticut.. perhaps it is because of out of all the head shots I viewed, she actually looks like a normal girl. Though I will agree that Miss Massachusetts is very purty..
2004-09-19 07:01:40 PM  

Louisiana also did not fare well in the new "Miss America Quiz" portion, getting only one question right out of 4 or 5.

There were 6 questions, and she got 2 of them correct.
2004-09-19 07:06:08 PM  
2004-09-19 07:08:15 PM  
why doesn't she do Miss USA? She already did, but at age 18...,

I hope Miss USA was at least 18 too.
2004-09-19 07:09:39 PM  
Then I guess it's 1 outta 4/5 +1?
2004-09-19 07:17:10 PM  
And thus, I now know to reread my comments twice before I post.

BTW, Miss America has a really strict morality clause. I don't even think any national contestant has come out of the closet. And definitely no nude pics either. I guess you'll all just have to use your imagination. :P
2004-09-19 07:18:46 PM  
Methinks me knows why the lass is from the "Virgin" Islands...

[image from too old to be available]
2004-09-19 07:19:37 PM  
Mesmer: nice post, 10% of the score goes for the swimsuit portion, cannot find a score category for facial "beauty".

The scoring methodology accounts for all of the "anomalies" of appearance.

Wildcat and others: nice post to compare and see the contestants in candids, most are even less likely when seen in their candids.

Pageants minus the "beauty" still have their charm, but scoring needs to be based on something the audience can see.

jsebrech: very elegant post
2004-09-19 07:22:05 PM  
Arrrg, matey. What has thee in the Colorado water that causes such scurvy looks?
2004-09-19 07:28:05 PM  
I'll be honest. I did some locals back in the day. Never even placed. Walked away with $50 here or $100 there though. Since it's free to enter and I got my wardrobe cheap, I made a little $ off of it. It's not a bad deal if you're in college and broke. The girls you see on TV are the ones that spent a lot of money though... bleaching teeth, 10k on wardrobe, maybe even plastic surgery. Some states even pay for the girls to have work done on them. Some girls are stuck footing the bill themselves (VT barely has a state pageant at all). It's a whole other planet that those girls live on... as for me, it was a learning experience. I don't think I'd ever compete in a USA pageant, even if I thought I could win (I couldn't). But Miss America does have its good points, and scholarship money is definitely one of them.
2004-09-19 07:32:10 PM  
Ms. Louisiana & Ms. Florida are far prettier girls, in that "will be either a congressman's wife or a whore in 5 years" kind of way.

The winner gal looks like Florida's own Katherine Harris. Brrrr!
2004-09-19 07:36:38 PM  
miles and miles of teeth.... yuk
2004-09-19 07:49:11 PM  
this one look's so airbrushed (or she's got on at least 50 pounds of make-up) that it looks more like a drawing than a picture.
2004-09-19 07:54:00 PM  

No, she was pretty snobby. I mean, she'd be nice to you to your face if you went to talk to her, but she always seemed to be looking down her nose at you. always. She really did cheat her ass through high school, test answers written on the side of her fingers, not turning in an assignment and then sneaking it in to the middle of the pile, mother did most of her papers/reports, things like that. She acted like she was entitled to get good things and she shouldn't have to do the work for them.

eventually it came down between her and another girl, Erin, for valedictorian. Erin worked her ass off through high school, every bit of it perfectly honest. rumour was the decision came down to .OO1 of a percent in their GPA (so i hear) but well Vicky got it, Erin didn't. vicky simply had richer parents. my school district then switched to a 100 % scale instead of a 4.0 scale to ensure that good people didn't get valedictorian (complicated, i can really explain if you'd like me to. email me- tishy­kb­[nospam-﹫-backwards]ooh­ay*com if you're that interested)

Vicky did have a good opera-trained voice... but well, opera trained voices don't really go well with musicals, or microphones, net result in gut and ear-wrenching performances. i'll never forget that vicky bechtold screech *shudder*

I'm just hoping this will be the end of a long, long reign of ass-kissing befallen over johnstown. somehow, i just think it'll get a lot worse.
2004-09-19 08:04:53 PM  
Omg, i was looking at the candidates photos... how did so many ugly women get in the pageant? There are just 3 or 4 pretty girls in there...

/never been a big fan of beauty pageants anyway
2004-09-19 08:05:18 PM  
Why do they all look at least 10 years older than they really are?
2004-09-19 08:05:18 PM  
3 bagger...

\still would...
2004-09-19 08:06:23 PM  
yeah, she's definitely a butterface

the bodys' rockin, but her face...yikes
2004-09-19 08:08:01 PM  
Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder!
2004-09-19 08:09:10 PM  
Here it is....another set of 6 free gmail invites....for farkers who are busy with their genitals and this webpage on this perfect sunday night.....

Send thank you cards to dilipb at hotmail.....cheers!
2004-09-19 08:10:55 PM  
Yawn! Let me know when the next Miss Hawaiian Tropic is crowned. Now that's a beauty padgent!
2004-09-19 08:15:15 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-09-19 08:16:35 PM  
What can I say, I needed a comment to make that pic even funnier.
/still giggling
2004-09-19 08:18:23 PM  
Plastic people...oh baby now you're such a drag...
2004-09-19 08:21:46 PM  
I'm sorry but I just can't get past Fecal Pandora's post. What the hell is that ?
2004-09-19 08:32:46 PM  
"The reason why Miss Alabama is now Miss USA"

I count two reasons.
2004-09-19 08:34:43 PM  


She's a stone cold fox!
2004-09-19 08:34:45 PM  

That's a wacko jacko mask.
2004-09-19 08:45:58 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

2004-09-19 08:49:28 PM  
I think you pretty much know you're not going to win when they ask you to dress as Minnie Pearl for the big parade.

yeah, but its tough to hide a hard on when youre dressed like minnie pearl.
2004-09-19 09:04:27 PM  
Don't you guys know anything? Don't get Miss America confused with Miss USA. This is Miss USA, stop posting Miss America stuff!

(My wife is very into pageants)
2004-09-19 09:10:04 PM  

What? If your wife is "very into pageants", she'd know that Miss America is held in September, Miss World is held in December, Miss USA is held in February, Miss Universe is held in May, and Miss Teen USA is held in August. It's the same every year. What pageant was she watching last night if it wasn't Miss America?

I just know, KNOW, that someone is going to make a crack about the held thing.
2004-09-19 09:12:53 PM  
There are at least a million other girls that are 20 times hotter than that. Miss USA my ass.
2004-09-19 09:12:55 PM  
Whoops. I take it back. They moved USA to April and Universe to June. I haven't watched either of those in awhile.
2004-09-19 09:22:29 PM  
Miss Flordia:

Platform: Queen for a Day
Talent: Vocal

What the hell is That about?
"I don't want to create a stupid platform. I just want to wear a crown. Hence my platform."

How about Platform: Subway
or Platform: Shoes
[image from too old to be available]

Doesn't this look like a photo from Penthouse's Pet of the Month photo essay?

Cue electronic porn music.
2004-09-19 09:56:03 PM  
Nah, if Penthouse spent that much on airbrushing and/or makeup they'd go out of business.
2004-09-19 10:05:01 PM  
Amen to BOBFOC!!
I think it was hurricane sympathy: she faced off vs. Louisiana.
2004-09-19 10:06:39 PM  
aahhhgghhh! pirates like to approach the louisiana "beach" from behind....aaargh aaarrgh aaarrgghhh!!!
2004-09-19 10:18:36 PM  
She was a cheating princess snob, if e'r there was.

oohhh dish!

/cause i'm that kind of guy = P
2004-09-19 10:25:54 PM  
dumbass amweicans...what's next? parading sacntily-dressed goats across a stage to be judged?

...oh, wait...wrong thread
2004-09-19 10:26:12 PM  
That was nice. Now where are my boobies?
2004-09-19 10:28:45 PM  
amweicans = Americans

sowwy, Stwongbad
2004-09-19 10:32:46 PM  
BloodyPuppy: this isn't victorian england. the majority of men throughout history have had long hair. only in modern times, mostly western civilizations, have men kep their hair shorter.
Might as well make your woman wear a corset so your waists don't look similar. societal standards appeal only to those that buy into them."

And we live in modern times, and in a western civilization.

Thus, if your a female, grow that shiat out. If your a male, keep that shiat short.

2004-09-19 11:21:34 PM  
Short hair on chicks is hot. Much less bland and traditionalistic. Shows a sense of adventure.
2004-09-19 11:23:54 PM  
What? If your wife is "very into pageants", she'd know that Miss America is held in September, Miss World is held in December, Miss USA is held in February, Miss Universe is held in May, and Miss Teen USA is held in August. It's the same every year. What pageant was she watching last night if it wasn't Miss America?

I was held in July. I didn't place, but I got some lovely parting gifts.

Thanks, Mesmer, you set me up for that.
2004-09-19 11:34:47 PM  
youre all missing the point, Miss Mass is the only NORMAL looking one of the bunch
2004-09-19 11:36:16 PM  
Holy Cow, Drue, thats my DENTIST. Dr Chainn-Fan Gibson. Wheatland Dental, Naperville, IL!
2004-09-19 11:43:49 PM  
Miss Alabama? I'd Bam her!

[image from too old to be available]
Displayed 50 of 298 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.