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(Yahoo) Boobies The reason why Miss Alabama is now Miss USA   ( story.news.yahoo.com) divider line
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174211 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Sep 2004 at 1:08 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



298 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
2004-09-19 09:51:20 AM  
I'd vaseline and duct tape it.
 
2004-09-19 09:52:30 AM  
Obviously the submitter was typing one handed. Miss America. USA is just quicker.
 
2004-09-19 09:53:08 AM  
id hit it with my penis.
 
2004-09-19 09:58:52 AM  
They choose the winner based on personality, though... right?
 
2004-09-19 10:04:31 AM  
A victory for the B-cup.
 
2004-09-19 10:04:59 AM  
Maybe she got the hurricane sympathy vote.
 
2004-09-19 10:05:54 AM  
Roll Tide
 
2004-09-19 10:07:10 AM  

Turn it up....

Sweet Home Albama

 
2004-09-19 10:19:31 AM  
She's a BOBFOC (Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch)
 
2004-09-19 10:49:34 AM  
lol @ bobfoc
 
2004-09-19 10:51:19 AM  
Arrr! I would plunder her booty!
 
2004-09-19 11:34:51 AM  
You boys are so funny. We all know the real reason she won is that she's a good girl, pretty, nice to dogs and old people, and she performed oral sex on every judge twice.
 
2004-09-19 11:44:19 AM  
Get some implants, flatty.
 
2004-09-19 11:54:57 AM  
That face....yucky
 
2004-09-19 11:57:38 AM  
Her teeth remind me of that Friends episode where Ross has the glow-in-the-dark bleaching.
 
2004-09-19 11:58:31 AM  
"
 
2004-09-19 12:30:38 PM  
I'd hit it, but I'd be sure to keep my eyes below the neckline
 
2004-09-19 12:44:49 PM  
All the hot ones are going the webcam whore route to earn that tuition.
 
2004-09-19 01:11:35 PM  
bobfoc = classic.
 
2004-09-19 01:13:07 PM  
Id hit it..

..then steal her crown in the middle of the night and prance around like a princess...
 
2004-09-19 01:15:57 PM  
Miss Florida was better
 
2004-09-19 01:17:07 PM  
Miss Florida has a mullet.
 
2004-09-19 01:17:22 PM  
Miss Florida is ten times hotter. I suck at html, so just look up "Jenna Edwards".

I'd hit it like drunk in a trailer park.
 
2004-09-19 01:18:36 PM  
I liked Miss Lousiana, she was hot and dumb as a rock. It would have been funny as hell if she would have won.

/arrrrr matey!
 
2004-09-19 01:18:42 PM  
Bambi, she looks more like a blockomo to me.

blockomo = she only looks good from a block o' mo away.

/would still hit it... cuz she's Miss America and all....
 
2004-09-19 01:19:06 PM  
darkhorse23 Sounds like she's the perfect woman.

/bobfoc: comededy gold
 
2004-09-19 01:20:18 PM  
Didn't like her.
 
2004-09-19 01:20:51 PM  
She's wearing an evil face. The boobies are the eyes. And the bottom has an evil single tooth grin.
 
2004-09-19 01:21:21 PM  
just take the clothes off already... and put it on hbo.
 
2004-09-19 01:21:49 PM  
Both Florida and Alabama's faces are lacking, considering that they're supposedly the most beautiful women in their respective states.
 
2004-09-19 01:22:08 PM  
Miss NJ encouraging kids to join a gang at an early age.
 
2004-09-19 01:23:58 PM  
What boobies? Very funny, LaLiSa.
 
2004-09-19 01:24:47 PM  
Swapped during a commercial to watch the crowning. Not sure how Miss Louisiana (runner-up) lost to this butterface.

Final two
 
2004-09-19 01:25:51 PM  
Miss Utah! That's what I'm talking about.
 
2004-09-19 01:26:06 PM  
Who says inbreeding can't be pretty?
 
2004-09-19 01:26:43 PM  
I see the evil face!!
 
2004-09-19 01:27:06 PM  
nutkick_42: What does that symbol mean? I've seen it being used for years from rockers to rappers, what is its significance?
 
2004-09-19 01:27:21 PM  
Miss Florida has quite the rack.
 
2004-09-19 01:28:09 PM  
Artificial skin colour, smile and breasts. Yup. Appropriate.

/would still hit it.
 
2004-09-19 01:28:58 PM  
I've seen a face like Miss Alabama's before. It had a bucket of oats hanging from it.
 
2004-09-19 01:29:07 PM  
Be the first on your block to own one of the Miss USA Blowup Doll Collection
 
2004-09-19 01:29:47 PM  
Now just remember its a SCHOLARSHIP Pageant....

I am monkey might fly out of my butt as I would hit them ALL!
 
2004-09-19 01:30:02 PM  
What... no camel toe this year?

/meh
 
2004-09-19 01:30:43 PM  
Of all the disturbing Fark posts i've ever glimpsed through the ages I would have to say Fecal Pandora's tops the list.....thank you for a new year of nightmares
 
2004-09-19 01:30:49 PM  
Yesterday - Miss Alabama
Today - Miss USA
Tomorrow - Porn Actress
 
2004-09-19 01:31:47 PM  
omg drue that's perfect.
 
2004-09-19 01:32:56 PM  
zorro - got any statistics to back that up with?

Preferably with links...
 
2004-09-19 01:33:22 PM  
Thank goodness I'm not the only one who thought she was one of the worst on there. With her friggin cat eyes and clown make up. She also showed no emotion.

Miss CA was so cute and so was Miss ARK.

/not gay, but really likes pagaents.
 
2004-09-19 01:33:38 PM  
I hate that hour-in-a-tanner tan skin. I prefer my women palish/vibrant.

/Still would hit it of course.
 
2004-09-19 01:33:49 PM  
where's the tits at?
 
2004-09-19 01:34:52 PM  
Scary.

/Dosen't watch "pagents"
 
2004-09-19 01:35:57 PM  
[image from us.news1.yimg.com too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 01:37:03 PM  
Doh.. make that Miss America Blowup Doll Collection, like there's a difference.
 
2004-09-19 01:38:00 PM  
Ugh. Just ugh.

/didn't watch pageant
 
2004-09-19 01:38:34 PM  
I want a sparkly 80s dress with a big ass bow on it!

/goes to thrift store
 
2004-09-19 01:38:37 PM  
Is miss arizona kind of a fatty?

http://www.printroom.com/ViewGalleryPhoto.asp?shopperid=CQ3J7QJ0J0JA9J​PNCH38KW X3S9500439&userid=missamerica2004&gallery_id=97130&image_id=0

can't link it dammit

So Miss CA wins talent and is obviously the smartest. but this dumb broad wins. no justice no peace.

/seriously im not gay.
 
2004-09-19 01:40:24 PM  
not gay, but really likes pagaents.

does not compute
 
2004-09-19 01:40:45 PM  
[image from misssouthcarolina.com too old to be available]

Miss South Carolina > Miss Alerbamer or Miss Floriduh
 
2004-09-19 01:40:58 PM  
The so called "gang sign" is saying "I love you" in Sign Language. Thats common knowledge
 
2004-09-19 01:41:43 PM  
i prefer pr0n to these pagents.
 
2004-09-19 01:42:11 PM  
[image from webpages.charter.net too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 01:42:26 PM  
Why? Didn't the other contestants have breasts?
 
2004-09-19 01:43:48 PM  
Fireball: first runner up in the "bazow-zing" competition!

/gets Miss Alabama some ice for her bloody nose
 
2004-09-19 01:44:34 PM  
Nothing Speshel: Thanks, I was a sheltered youth aha. ;p
 
2004-09-19 01:44:47 PM  
She sort of has that long-toothed horsey face I associate with Southern belles of a certain type. Proof that inbreeding is not always a bad thing.
 
2004-09-19 01:46:25 PM  
Miss Louisiana is teh HOTT.
 
2004-09-19 01:48:01 PM  
was this Ms. America or the butterface contest?
 
2004-09-19 01:48:29 PM  
Very hot. If she plays her cards right she could be Mrs. farktimenow.
 
2004-09-19 01:48:35 PM  
After going through all the images on the website, I'm convinced that the pageant organizers must be taking the scholarship aspect of the contestant qualifications too seriously. Half of those women I wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley... and of course there are a few exceptions to the rule... introducing Miss DC

[image from missamerica.org too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 01:49:24 PM  
[image from webpages.marshall.edu too old to be available]

Now, she had poise!
 
2004-09-19 01:50:06 PM  
I'd hit for world peace.
 
2004-09-19 01:50:58 PM  
The bikinis are an attempt to boost television ratings. It's a step in the right direction. They've made it less boring. Now they need to do something to make it interesting.
 
2004-09-19 01:51:53 PM  
"Now they need to do something to make it interesting."

/Thongs. : )
 
2004-09-19 01:52:35 PM  
Should have a topless section and make it payperview. :D
 
2004-09-19 01:53:04 PM  
[image from missamerica.com too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 01:53:17 PM  
Miss Texas was from my college.
 
2004-09-19 01:54:38 PM  
Super hot!!!!

[image from missamerica.org too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 01:56:22 PM  
*sharp knees*
 
2004-09-19 01:59:16 PM  
Nice shoes!
 
2004-09-19 02:01:53 PM  
drue: Wow...what a china doll. I'd hit it, if it offered...
 
2004-09-19 02:04:40 PM  
Hot, but the high-heels-with-bikini thing always makes me laugh.
 
2004-09-19 02:05:42 PM  
wonder if they actually go down?
 
2004-09-19 02:08:23 PM  
Nice A-cups. I'm from Mississippi and I'd have to contest that my dog looks better than she does.
 
2004-09-19 02:14:38 PM  
In response to naughtygudgy's post, I went to google.com, entered Jenna Edwards, and hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button...

wow, what a looker!
 
2004-09-19 02:20:55 PM  
Isn't having a beauty contest for academic scholarships like having a chess tourament for atheltic scholarships?
 
2004-09-19 02:21:55 PM  
*embarrassed by my typing in the previous post*
 
2004-09-19 02:22:46 PM  
Is that was passes for beauty these days? She looks like Melissa Rivers' somewhat more attractive evil twin.

drue is correct. Ms. Louisiana should have won. And not just because she's my cousin. :)

/not a close relation, so I'd still hit it.
 
2004-09-19 02:23:13 PM  
I must agree with drue, Miss Louisiana is waay hotter. I have no clue how this scud even got Miss Alabama.

For that matter Miss Florida also way hotter.
 
2004-09-19 02:24:48 PM  
Miss Alabama looks like she had a stroke. She's busted. I was a big fan of Miss Louisiana and Miss California. Oh well.
 
2004-09-19 02:26:44 PM  
I like Miss Florida better but don't kid yourself I'd hit them all.
 
2004-09-19 02:29:09 PM  
I'm really not that impressed with miss florida, don't get me wrong I'd still hit it, hell I hit a hole in the wall. But, she's got bigger breasts thats about it, Alabama has a way hotter face. She could eat something though damn are those her ribs, they could all use a good meal :)
 
2004-09-19 02:31:14 PM  
Way better than puppy thread
 
2004-09-19 02:31:17 PM  
Stupid farking pageant. Really. Stupid. I can't imagine why anyone would want to watch a bunch...oh, wait. Still stupid, though. There are better looking women than her EVERYWHERE.
 
2004-09-19 02:32:55 PM  
sandwiches for all
 
2004-09-19 02:34:44 PM  
I'm still waiting for them to do away with the "talent" portion of the pageant and replace it with a "carpet-licking lesbian orgy" segment.
 
2004-09-19 02:35:21 PM  
Utah!
 
2004-09-19 02:35:42 PM  
[image from us.news2.yimg.com too old to be available]
Oh my...
 
2004-09-19 02:37:44 PM  
You mean it's not because she raises money for crippled kids and plays a musical instrument?
 
2004-09-19 02:38:31 PM  
yesterday = miss alabama
today = miss usa
tomorrow = mrs.firstlady of alabama
 
2004-09-19 02:39:07 PM  
she is fugly! great body but before i'd fark her i'd have to ask her paper or plastic? and what the hell another boobies link with no boobies...
 
2004-09-19 02:39:53 PM  
Hey, Britney's married.

As to the pageant, these women are supposedly all between the ages of 18-24. Even in their airbrushed Stepford Wives official pageant pictures they look like they passed 24 a good ten years ago. Miss Florida looks like she's in her 40's.
 
2004-09-19 02:41:06 PM  
BrunelloBabe,

You're pretty hot yourself! I'd much prefer you over our lucky Alabama contestant!!
 
2004-09-19 02:41:09 PM  
I'd hit it, but only under the boardwalk


/can't believe no said that yet!
 
2004-09-19 02:41:14 PM  
Miss Florida could have used the money to get more hair! I hate when women have short hair. It turns even the hottest chick into "meh".

/has very long hair, but secretly wishes it was short sometimes cuz its a pain to blowdry
 
2004-09-19 02:44:46 PM  
If I knew that was going to be the competition, I would have entered. I need tuition money...

(Guess there's always stripping... )
 
2004-09-19 02:46:08 PM  
Once again a boobies tag with no actual boobies.

Cock punch to the submitter.
 
2004-09-19 02:47:03 PM  
2004-09-19 01:40:45 PM Don Dokken,

The first pic that's actually prettier than the winner. Or even AS pretty.

You guys are idiots--where's that studman69 pic when you need it?

Miss DC is also very nice.

All this "eat a sandwich" stuff is pretty dumb also. A body you can bounce a quarter off of--anywhere on her--is a good thing, people. One of the hottest women I've ever known is a bigtime athlete--ROWR. It's not just me either; I've seen her leave a trail of open-mouthed guys in her wake. She could tear me into little bitty pieces any day. Besides, it also means she can be on top...for a while... :D
 
2004-09-19 02:51:16 PM  
Yarrr, 'tis it the 80's again? 'Tis all cougars that look like ye mistress o' ye boss.
 
2004-09-19 02:56:38 PM  
2004-09-19 02:22:46 PM Raven72

Is that was passes for beauty these days? She looks like Melissa Rivers' somewhat more attractive evil twin.

drue is correct. Ms. Louisiana should have won. And not just because she's my cousin. :)

/not a close relation, so I'd still hit it.


It's Ms. Louisiana -- I'm guessing anything other than brother and sister isn't considered a close relation. And even then...
 
2004-09-19 02:57:24 PM  
I could do without the joker-faced snarl which seems to be the standard pose for each of them. Is there some rule that states that all 96 of their teeth have to be showing in each and every picture?

And what's with the bikinis that make them look like they got the maxi-pad the wrong way round?
 
2004-09-19 02:57:42 PM  
What she was thinking...

http://www.doubleagent.com/photos.php?c1=4&c2=16&c3=114&c4=4610
 
2004-09-19 02:59:37 PM  
Compare Miss America with Miss Switzerland (shwon below)
[image from us.news1.yimg.com too old to be available]
Not bad, but "I'm so glad I'm living in the USA"
 
2004-09-19 02:59:57 PM  
Yarrr, I'd be hittin all of the scurvy wenches till the Cap'n make me walk the plank.

/hard to fap with hook-hand. Yarrr
 
2004-09-19 03:00:05 PM  
BOBFOC = classic.
 
2004-09-19 03:01:19 PM  
"Miss Florida was better"

If you like Girls that have hair cuts like little boys.

You like little boys
 
2004-09-19 03:03:34 PM  
She looks OK in the profile shot in the link, but the front shot isn't all that good. Although I figure that's because of bad eyeshadow and too much lipstick.

Does nobody understand "subtle makeup" anymore?

N.
 
2004-09-19 03:03:45 PM  
Arrrrgh! Pirates like to make landfall in Florida!
 
2004-09-19 03:04:05 PM  
How TF did Miss Louisiana not win?
 
2004-09-19 03:07:48 PM  
How do you get your teeth to glow eerie white like that? Do you have to put little LEDs in them, or is it just a mirror trick like making the Statue of Liberty disappear?
 
2004-09-19 03:16:14 PM  
I liked this image and caption:

[image from us.news1.yimg.com too old to be available]
Miss Tennessee Ashley Eicher holds up her shoes as she rides in the likeness of country music star Minnie Pearl along the Miss America parade route on the Boardwalk in Atlantic City, New Jersey, September 17, 2004.

I think you pretty much know you're not going to win when they ask you to dress as Minnie Pearl for the big parade.
 
2004-09-19 03:19:10 PM  
Alabama = butterface

Miss Louisana lost that coin flip at the end, and her talent was dancing compared to Alabama's singing, and I think that's why she lost.

Miss Florida looks like she got way too much self-tanner on her face and chest and none on her lower legs. Ever heard of a full-length mirror?

I thought Miss Massachusetts was the prettiest. You can see them all with too much makeup on here.
 
2004-09-19 03:19:44 PM  
Speaking of severe butterfaces, has anyone laughed at today's SBB pics? I'm not sure if those are girls are klingons.
 
2004-09-19 03:26:51 PM  
Based on the photocall in inconnu's post, I'd have said that

Ms Arkansas,
Ms Arizona,
Ms Indiana,
Ms Louisiana,
Ms Michigan,
Ms New Jersey, and
Ms Virgin Islands

all should've been in any kind of play-off **long** after Ms Alabama had been consigned to the "body okay, face fark-awful" pile.

Just me, like.
 
2004-09-19 03:28:47 PM  
(edit: sorry, Wildcat's post, not inconnu's.)
 
2004-09-19 03:31:11 PM  
SomeFarker
Not bad, but "I'm so glad I'm living in the USA"

Well she does look real so I guess thats the problem.
I like her better
 
2004-09-19 03:32:47 PM  
I'd hit it..... with about 7k worth of implants.

An Ms Florida looks like that little hottie from the home improvement show that was giving it up for cash at the aids benefit. What was her name?
 
2004-09-19 03:34:37 PM  
Screw the real Miss America. I'm heading to LA this Thanksgiving for the Junior Miss America Pageant (sister is Miss Virginia). I think I'm gonna pretend I'm a judge.

"You want to win, don't you?"
 
2004-09-19 03:34:49 PM  
Miss Montana = Mack Truck.

/as in, "Damn, that girl looks like she got hit by a Mack truck!"
 
2004-09-19 03:37:58 PM  
Fecal Pandora i actually let out a welp of horror when i saw that.
 
2004-09-19 03:38:43 PM  
What? No cries of "I'D CROWN IT?" You guys disappoint me...
 
2004-09-19 03:41:02 PM  
SomeFarker:

It depends on your tastes. I prefer miss switzerland to miss america. I think this sentence from Tolstoy's War and Peace best sums up my opinion on the matter:

"But Helene seemed, as it were, hardened by a varnish left by the thousands of looks that had scanned her person, while Natasha was like a girl exposed for the first time, who would have felt very much ashamed had she not been assured that this was absolutely necessary."

Miss America looks too varnished to my eyes.
 
2004-09-19 03:45:25 PM  
So.. it looks like Fecal Pandora's post was a Michael Jackson mask? Pretty freaky.
 
2004-09-19 03:45:31 PM  
 
2004-09-19 03:54:04 PM  
2004-09-19 03:04:05 PM JohnnyDanger
How TF did Miss Louisiana not win?

OK, I was at Mom's house, so happened to see this (would not normally watch it, at least not past the swimsuit part).

Miss Louisiana was definitely the hottest but when it got to the final talent competition she just jumped around the stage like a little girl with some music playing. Was absolutely the strangest thing. Miss Alabama had a pretty nice voice and talent is a high % of the vote.

Louisiana also did not fare well in the new "Miss America Quiz" portion, getting only one question right out of 4 or 5.
 
2004-09-19 03:56:58 PM  
I looked at the lineup and well frankly.....If good looking women get kittens killed... I think i just brought some BACK TO LIFE...

/I'm sayin.. NO
 
2004-09-19 03:57:29 PM  
While none of those women are particularly unattractive, neither are any of them smoking hot.

What sort of message are we sending to our young girls in this country when we let anything less than a totally smoking hot chick win the title of Miss America.

We need to have standards in this country. Brutal, terrifyingly unreachable standards. This is the only thing these little girls have to live and die for. If they don't have some unobttainable goal of beauty to reach for, then what are they going to do?

Get jobs?

Shyeah right.

TF
 
2004-09-19 04:01:05 PM  
Hey, you know that painting of Edward Munch's, "The Scream" that was stolen a while back?

I found it HERE
 
2004-09-19 04:02:53 PM  
Thanks wonderkitten......you have saved the lives of countless kittens...you should be proud.

/hero
 
2004-09-19 04:09:56 PM  
[image from printroom.com too old to be available]

Love is a battlefield!
 
2004-09-19 04:11:32 PM  
was this the year of the giant foreheads? sheez... Tyra Banks might have had a chance this year!
 
2004-09-19 04:16:22 PM  
Holy shiat. I was in choir and used to ride the bus to school with Miss Colorado. The world is a small place...
 
2004-09-19 04:16:58 PM  
I'm with TwistedFark! These chicks are barely above the underage teenage harlots at the mall. I want my Miss USA to be so incredibly hot that it hurts just to look at her. It shouldn't hurt when scores of kittens are killed thinking about her though.

Umm, oh yeah, Miss Bermuda! I'd plunder her booty! YARGH!
 
2004-09-19 04:17:24 PM  
Alabama's previous Miss America (Heather Whitestone, 1995) looked better, but then she turned into a Republican Wife, moved to Atlanta, and got cochlear implants.
 
2004-09-19 04:17:25 PM  
TravelinJones
Miss Louisiana was definitely the hottest but when it got to the final talent competition she just jumped around the stage like a little girl with some music playing. Was absolutely the strangest thing.

I second that. I had to actually turn away from the TV in embarrassment at Miss Louisiana's "jazz dance." She does get credit for being smokin' hot in the swimsuit competition, however. Miss Alabama didn't seem surprised or thankful to win at the end. I expect these ladies to jump up and down or cry or something.
 
2004-09-19 04:18:58 PM  
This thread needs more boobies...
[image from i.xanga.com too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 04:19:12 PM  
What's with the Southern women and the big hair? Only Jennifer Aniston can have that do, and every contestant south of the Mason-Dixon line looks like a freaking horse puppet. Neiggggggggh!
 
2004-09-19 04:22:38 PM  
I tried to find the least attractive but there are just too many competing for that title.

Some of the runners-up:

South Dakota
[image from img.photobucket.com too old to be available]

Texas
[image from img.photobucket.com too old to be available]

Rhode Island
[image from img.photobucket.com too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 04:23:05 PM  
Here is a photo of the sexiest woman alive.

[image from us.news1.yimg.com too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 04:24:18 PM  
Miss Florida = Built to Breed
 
2004-09-19 04:27:42 PM  
What is the connection with beauty pagents and teacher wanna-be's or children's causes? Always the same types in these things. Then again, I doubt few Astronauts or Chemical Engineers are on the circuit.

"I'm interested in world peace, feeding children, and getting my ass on the space shuttle."
 
2004-09-19 04:34:42 PM  
i went to high school with Miss Pennsylvania
[image from misspa.org too old to be available]


She was a cheating princess snob, if e'r there was.
 
2004-09-19 04:35:09 PM  
Fecal Pandora:

WHY GOD, WHY!?!?

That is all.
 
2004-09-19 04:37:15 PM  
It seems like a lot of people from Alabama are quite dark... does Alabama have some Spanish or Lebanese blood in the gene pool or something?

There are lots of hot Lebanese Texans whose ancestors came here several generations ago.
 
2004-09-19 04:45:49 PM  
I'm no beauty queen - but is it me, or does Ms Alabama look like she has Downs Syndrome?
 
jph
2004-09-19 04:46:26 PM  
Fecal Pandora:

Uhhh...Miss Texas certainly does not look ugly. You're the "sharp knees" guy, I suppose.

octo:

Latitude, solar radiation, and melanin. Look them up.
 
2004-09-19 04:46:41 PM  
Thread... needs more... boobies!
[image from geo.cornell.edu too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 04:48:44 PM  
If this was judged by body and face alone, The wrong girl won.
 
2004-09-19 04:49:05 PM  
I'd Alabam-her.
Uh huh huh huh huh
 
2004-09-19 04:56:15 PM  
I think I missed the memo that says straight guys don't like girls w/ short hair. Personally, I think girls w/ short hair can be really cute. But, the first guy I attracted after I chopped all my hair off was totally bi...and now I'm kind of worried. Is this in the unwritten rule book?
 
2004-09-19 04:58:30 PM  
jph

I live closer to the equator than this chick does, so latitude and solar radiation are off the table.

That leaves melanin, which was the original subject of my inquiry.

But actually looking at the other pictures in this thread she doesn't look so tan after all. Kind of sallow, even.
 
2004-09-19 05:04:52 PM  
Here is a picture of Miss NJ with less makeup.

http://tinyurl.com/5utln
 
2004-09-19 05:05:30 PM  
Besides, its nice to see a white girl win.
 
2004-09-19 05:13:19 PM  
freda:

There are a couple reasons for that. One is that many guys see short hair on a woman, and due to previous experiences think " If I talk to her she will tell me how much men suck and that she hates me." Personally, I think short hair just does not look good on the majority of women. One of my exes chopped off almost all of her hair soon after we started dating and it really decreased my attraction level for her (we hadn't been dating long), but when it grew out it was lust all over again.

That said, there are plenty of guys who like (or at least don't mind) girls with short hair. My personal opinion is you should just date girls, they kiss better anyway.
 
2004-09-19 05:14:17 PM  
Hubba hubba!

Sweet!
 
2004-09-19 05:14:55 PM  
girl with short hair... reminds me of Ms. FL....
would hit it with anything I've got....
nsfw?
http://gordonkeith.com/paigedavispics.htm
 
2004-09-19 05:19:10 PM  
BOBFOC = coffee in keyboard
 
2004-09-19 05:22:24 PM  
Well, it's certainly not because of her face.
 
2004-09-19 05:23:40 PM  
miss new mexico scares me.
 
2004-09-19 05:24:20 PM  
Now I know why Ivan suddenly veered east . . .
 
2004-09-19 05:31:02 PM  
ya know, i am not complaining here, she is attactive, BUT, she looks a LOT older than 24...
 
2004-09-19 05:33:24 PM  
Ha, I went to high school with this girl. And Miss Fear Factor USA 2004. And I didn't hit either of them. I don't even think this girl won the high school pageant.
 
2004-09-19 05:34:40 PM  
kaosrain:

Nooo! There's that, too!! I am going to have a shirt made that says, "I am not a lesbian".

Miss America looks like Lisa Marie. On a bad day.
 
2004-09-19 05:38:11 PM  
I like Miss Switzerland
 
2004-09-19 05:40:54 PM  
freda:

If I wanted to date someone who looked like a guy, well I would just date a guy. Straight men like women who look like women, one aspect of which usually includes includes long hair.

Unless you have a great head and shave it all off. But the only one I've seen who was hot doing that was Persis Khambatta in Star Trek: The Motion Picture.
 
2004-09-19 05:43:39 PM  
jph

Latitude, solar radiation, and melanin. Look them up.

There are many theories, but nothing has been proven. Also, unless somone from Alabama was native american, and from a tribe in the region, nothing you listed is relevant for her skin color.
It takes thousands of years for a permanent adaption that you suggest.
I suggest you look this up...

http://barshlab.stanford.edu/Publications/SkinColorPLoS.pdf

sorry no html.
 
nfw
2004-09-19 05:43:45 PM  
What's the age limit for Miss America? The photos seem more appropriate for a Mrs America contest.
 
2004-09-19 05:44:29 PM  
that's all they had to choose from wooooooo
 
2004-09-19 05:44:36 PM  
Good from far, but far from good. There's better looking women in a New Jersey mall.
 
2004-09-19 05:44:44 PM  
Farkettes:

Men like long hair on their women. They always have and they always will. Why women cut their hair short when they hit their thirties is a mystery to men. Keep your hair long, it amuses them.
 
2004-09-19 05:45:38 PM  
I don't look like a guy! And men w/ long hair don't look like women. Usually.

You cannot tell me Miss Florida looka lika man. Uh huh! She is HOT!
 
2004-09-19 05:51:03 PM  
Looks like Miss Alabama should portray Daisy Dukes in the upcoming Dukes of Hazzard movie, instead of Jessica Simpson. At least she has the hair and the accent.
 
2004-09-19 05:52:33 PM  
I'd just like to echo MorrisBird's sentiments at 2004-09-19 05:44:44 PM.

Seriously. If you want to catch us guys, why blur the gender line? We don't swing that way.
 
2004-09-19 05:59:06 PM  
A girl's got to be really feminine looking--think delicate--to pull off wearing short hair without winding up being a citizen of Dyke City.
 
2004-09-19 06:00:42 PM  
Great the only two to win from my state, one fugly, the other deaf. Yay! Go Alabuba. We gawts the good genes down here.
 
2004-09-19 06:02:06 PM  
P.S. Short haired women 8/10 times are hawt.
 
2004-09-19 06:04:36 PM  
mkfreeberg

blur the gender line? this isn't victorian england. the majority of men throughout history have had long hair. only in modern times, mostly western civilizations, have men kep their hair shorter.
Might as well make your woman wear a corset so your waists don't look similar.
societal standards appeal only to those that buy into them.
i like short hair as well as long, as long as it has some shape to it.
do what you like ladies, you don't need shallow guys.
 
2004-09-19 06:05:36 PM  
When did they start wearing string bikinis and why wasn't I informed?
 
2004-09-19 06:06:08 PM  
I second what Pathogen said.
 
2004-09-19 06:07:40 PM  
My ex boyfriend liked short hair and convinced me to cut mine off. I thought I looked like a lesbian, but maybe that was why he liked it?
 
nfw
2004-09-19 06:09:55 PM  
Miss Texas has the Shannon Doherty one eye higher than another look going on, and for some reason she reminds me of Jimmy Carter.

Miss Colorado is the love child of John Kerry.

Miss RI is an evil witch.

Miss Virgina is a man
 
2004-09-19 06:13:59 PM  
What's the age limit for Miss America? The photos seem more appropriate for a Mrs America contest.

Don't these women look freakishly OLD? All the 24-year-old women in my nursing class looked like teenagers. The 25-year-old living next door looks like a high-schooler, even when she wears a business suit. Even with the airbrushing these ladies look very, very mature. What's up with that?

Hell, I still get carded at the ABC and I'm 40. Well, the clerk is myopic. And usually a little drunk. I flirt with him a bit, too.

I need a drink.
 
2004-09-19 06:14:24 PM  
Myself, I think if pretty woman chops off her long hair, she looks awesome, because of all that pretty face, for about a week or two. Then I wish she had long hair again. Because it's such a great enhancer.

So maybe if a beauty queen with is going to have her 15 minutes on TV, she should go with short hair. Then if her face propels her to longer-lasting fame, she should grow her hair out.

/Or maybe just show more skin. It's all good.
 
2004-09-19 06:20:55 PM  
Goddamn I hate that fake-overly-tanned look that all Southern women aspire too. She is good looking and I would certainly hit it.... but I wish her and every other hottie would lay of the farking tanning booths.

/lives in Alabama
 
2004-09-19 06:23:05 PM  
I gotta say it, these chix are...pretty...in a very soccer mama kind of way, but they DO look to old to be MISS America. I mean, not rode-hard-and-hung-up-wet old, but still...
 
2004-09-19 06:29:55 PM  
I know this may be shocking to many of you, but the Miss America (Miss USA is a separate pageant system)pageant is not about finding the hottest chick to crown. It's a sholarship program. The primary emphasis on things like the swimsuit segment are physical fitness and poise under pressure. The bulk of the girls' score is from an interview (untelevised, I think), their work in their chosen platform (breast cancer or education programs or whatever), on-stage Q&A, and talent (singing, piano, etc). Many of these girls are VERY accomplished, even if they're not necessarily the brightest. Sure it still has some of that silly old-fashioned princessy girl thing going on, but these girls actually do a lot for their communities and earn money for college to boot. The increased emphasis on beauty these recent years is ONLY because of TV.
 
2004-09-19 06:30:58 PM  
[image from philhower.com too old to be available]

/indeed
 
2004-09-19 06:35:04 PM  
tishykb,

Was she really a snob, or are you a big dork?
 
2004-09-19 06:41:53 PM  
Very few women can chop off their hair and still look hot to me. One of the exceptions...
 
2004-09-19 06:42:59 PM  
Ive decided after looking at all the headshots... headshots pretty much suck. Most of these girls look nervous, desperate, or plastic. And in one case (Georgia) the copyright signature makes her look tatooed. Not good for a Miss America pageant.

That said, Florida looks like Sheena Easton.
Virgin Islands needs more concealer for her unicorn problem.
Wyoming looks like a 12 year old.

Id like to put Indiana, Hawaii, Nevada, and D.C. in my shopping cart for the trip home.
 
2004-09-19 06:43:23 PM  
We Americans like our women cheap ... like our president:>)
 
2004-09-19 06:46:55 PM  
For the record:

Miss USA is for profit and run by Trump, and is judged as follows: 1/3 interview, 1/3 swimsuit, 1/3 evening gown. Miss USA feeds into Miss Universe, also Trump owned. Most of the time when you see "Miss Country X", it means they're in the USA/Universe system. Unless they're in Miss World. Which is a whole other story.

Miss America is a non-profit, and the largest scholarship provider to women in the country. They've messed with the scoring system quite a bit, but it's interview, talent, swimsuit, evening gown, casual wear and a short onstage quiz. Contestants are required to have a platform, in which they do work towards a cause.

Miss Alabama won because she was consistant. She's been accepted to medical school and her platform is pediatric cancer. She won an award for doing the most towards her platform of any of the contestants. She had a toned body in swimsuit. Her gown was pretty decent. Her talent was on-key, if not a little boring. She did well in the quiz. She spoke with poise and humor. So she won.

Louisiana was beautiful. Plastic like a barbie though. She even wore pink for her little "dance". She did terribly on the quiz. I mean, really bad. I'm pretty sure her interview was good but probably not great. So, you ask, why doesn't she do Miss USA? She already did, but at age 18... and seasoned veterens always do better. But that's the real story.

As for me, I was rooting for California. The pic of her in this thread is the girl with the huge leg extension. They showed a clip of her dance and it looked fantastic. I think if she had made the top two (probably lost points in swimsuit for being short), she would have won. Tied with Alabama on the quiz, even. Oh well.

Miss America, incidently, makes about 200-250k during her reign from appearance fees. Not a bad job to have, but they travel constantly. It's an interesting job. Miss USA doesn't make as much, but gets an apartment in NYC for the year instead. Miss USA's in February. Tune in then if you want to see the wanna be models/strippers. :)
 
2004-09-19 06:54:27 PM  
mesmer242
So, you ask, why doesn't she do Miss USA? She already did...

There but for the grace of God, go I.
 
2004-09-19 07:01:12 PM  
I sorta dig Miss Conneticut.. perhaps it is because of out of all the head shots I viewed, she actually looks like a normal girl. Though I will agree that Miss Massachusetts is very purty..
 
2004-09-19 07:01:40 PM  
TravelinJones-

Louisiana also did not fare well in the new "Miss America Quiz" portion, getting only one question right out of 4 or 5.


There were 6 questions, and she got 2 of them correct.
 
2004-09-19 07:06:08 PM  
Skank-tacular.
 
2004-09-19 07:08:15 PM  
mesmer242
why doesn't she do Miss USA? She already did, but at age 18...,

I hope Miss USA was at least 18 too.
 
2004-09-19 07:09:39 PM  
Then I guess it's 1 outta 4/5 +1?
 
2004-09-19 07:17:10 PM  
And thus, I now know to reread my comments twice before I post.

BTW, Miss America has a really strict morality clause. I don't even think any national contestant has come out of the closet. And definitely no nude pics either. I guess you'll all just have to use your imagination. :P
 
2004-09-19 07:18:46 PM  
Methinks me knows why the lass is from the "Virgin" Islands...

[image from printroom.com too old to be available]
 
2004-09-19 07:19:37 PM  
Mesmer: nice post, 10% of the score goes for the swimsuit portion, cannot find a score category for facial "beauty".

The scoring methodology accounts for all of the "anomalies" of appearance.

Wildcat and others: nice post to compare and see the contestants in candids, most are even less likely when seen in their candids.

Pageants minus the "beauty" still have their charm, but scoring needs to be based on something the audience can see.

jsebrech: very elegant post
 
2004-09-19 07:22:05 PM  
Arrrg, matey. What has thee in the Colorado water that causes such scurvy looks?
 
2004-09-19 07:28:05 PM  
I'll be honest. I did some locals back in the day. Never even placed. Walked away with $50 here or $100 there though. Since it's free to enter and I got my wardrobe cheap, I made a little $ off of it. It's not a bad deal if you're in college and broke. The girls you see on TV are the ones that spent a lot of money though... bleaching teeth, 10k on wardrobe, maybe even plastic surgery. Some states even pay for the girls to have work done on them. Some girls are stuck footing the bill themselves (VT barely has a state pageant at all). It's a whole other planet that those girls live on... as for me, it was a learning experience. I don't think I'd ever compete in a USA pageant, even if I thought I could win (I couldn't). But Miss America does have its good points, and scholarship money is definitely one of them.
 
2004-09-19 07:32:10 PM  
Ms. Louisiana & Ms. Florida are far prettier girls, in that "will be either a congressman's wife or a whore in 5 years" kind of way.

The winner gal looks like Florida's own Katherine Harris. Brrrr!
 
2004-09-19 07:36:38 PM  
miles and miles of teeth.... yuk
 
2004-09-19 07:49:11 PM  
this one look's so airbrushed (or she's got on at least 50 pounds of make-up) that it looks more like a drawing than a picture.
 
2004-09-19 07:54:00 PM  
Saber

No, she was pretty snobby. I mean, she'd be nice to you to your face if you went to talk to her, but she always seemed to be looking down her nose at you. always. She really did cheat her ass through high school, test answers written on the side of her fingers, not turning in an assignment and then sneaking it in to the middle of the pile, mother did most of her papers/reports, things like that. She acted like she was entitled to get good things and she shouldn't have to do the work for them.

eventually it came down between her and another girl, Erin, for valedictorian. Erin worked her ass off through high school, every bit of it perfectly honest. rumour was the decision came down to .OO1 of a percent in their GPA (so i hear) but well Vicky got it, Erin didn't. vicky simply had richer parents. my school district then switched to a 100 % scale instead of a 4.0 scale to ensure that good people didn't get valedictorian (complicated, i can really explain if you'd like me to. email me- tishy­kb[nospam-﹫-backwards]o­ohay*com if you're that interested)

Vicky did have a good opera-trained voice... but well, opera trained voices don't really go well with musicals, or microphones, net result in gut and ear-wrenching performances. i'll never forget that vicky bechtold screech *shudder*

I'm just hoping this will be the end of a long, long reign of ass-kissing befallen over johnstown. somehow, i just think it'll get a lot worse.
 
2004-09-19 08:04:53 PM  
Omg, i was looking at the candidates photos... how did so many ugly women get in the pageant? There are just 3 or 4 pretty girls in there...

/never been a big fan of beauty pageants anyway
 
2004-09-19 08:05:18 PM  
Why do they all look at least 10 years older than they really are?
 
2004-09-19 08:05:18 PM  
3 bagger...

\still would...
 
2004-09-19 08:06:23 PM  
yeah, she's definitely a butterface

the bodys' rockin, but her face...yikes
 
2004-09-19 08:08:01 PM  
Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder!
 
2004-09-19 08:09:10 PM  
Here it is....another set of 6 free gmail invites....for farkers who are busy with their genitals and this webpage on this perfect sunday night.....

http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-b2fdf04cdd-31ee7aab59-dcfa048235
http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-b2fdf04cdd-d4c87bcba4-9b5caefffe
http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-b2fdf04cdd-aced09e9d7-78c8ef02ea
http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-b2fdf04cdd-ec09ab4f23-7004416406
http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-b2fdf04cdd-54a0314ba2-696a766633
http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-b2fdf04cdd-4f408216a9-71837154ff

Send thank you cards to dilipb at hotmail.....cheers!
 
2004-09-19 08:10:55 PM  
Yawn! Let me know when the next Miss Hawaiian Tropic is crowned. Now that's a beauty padgent!
 
2004-09-19 08:15:15 PM  
[image from printroom.com too old to be available]
BWOO!
 
2004-09-19 08:16:35 PM  
What can I say, I needed a comment to make that pic even funnier.
/still giggling
 
2004-09-19 08:18:23 PM  
Plastic people...oh baby now you're such a drag...
 
2004-09-19 08:21:46 PM  
I'm sorry but I just can't get past Fecal Pandora's post. What the hell is that ?
 
2004-09-19 08:32:46 PM  
"The reason why Miss Alabama is now Miss USA"

I count two reasons.
 
2004-09-19 08:34:43 PM  
Airbrushing.....

Puh-leeze......


She's a stone cold fox!
 
2004-09-19 08:34:45 PM  
MrSpeed

That's a wacko jacko mask.
 
2004-09-19 08:45:58 PM  
[image from us.news1.yimg.com too old to be available]

OZZY! OZZY! OZZY!
 
2004-09-19 08:49:28 PM  
I think you pretty much know you're not going to win when they ask you to dress as Minnie Pearl for the big parade.

yeah, but its tough to hide a hard on when youre dressed like minnie pearl.
 
2004-09-19 09:04:27 PM  
Don't you guys know anything? Don't get Miss America confused with Miss USA. This is Miss USA, stop posting Miss America stuff!

(My wife is very into pageants)
 
2004-09-19 09:10:04 PM  
RageAgainstTheMachine:

What? If your wife is "very into pageants", she'd know that Miss America is held in September, Miss World is held in December, Miss USA is held in February, Miss Universe is held in May, and Miss Teen USA is held in August. It's the same every year. What pageant was she watching last night if it wasn't Miss America?

I just know, KNOW, that someone is going to make a crack about the held thing.
 
2004-09-19 09:12:53 PM  
There are at least a million other girls that are 20 times hotter than that. Miss USA my ass.
 
2004-09-19 09:12:55 PM  
Whoops. I take it back. They moved USA to April and Universe to June. I haven't watched either of those in awhile.
 
2004-09-19 09:22:29 PM  
Miss Flordia:

Platform: Queen for a Day
Talent: Vocal

What the hell is That about?
"I don't want to create a stupid platform. I just want to wear a crown. Hence my platform."

How about Platform: Subway
or Platform: Shoes
[image from printroom.com too old to be available]

Doesn't this look like a photo from Penthouse's Pet of the Month photo essay?

Cue electronic porn music.
 
2004-09-19 09:56:03 PM  
Nah, if Penthouse spent that much on airbrushing and/or makeup they'd go out of business.
 
2004-09-19 10:05:01 PM  
Amen to BOBFOC!!
I think it was hurricane sympathy: she faced off vs. Louisiana.
 
2004-09-19 10:06:39 PM  
aahhhgghhh! pirates like to approach the louisiana "beach" from behind....aaargh aaarrgh aaarrgghhh!!!
 
2004-09-19 10:18:36 PM  
tishyk
She was a cheating princess snob, if e'r there was.

oohhh dish!


/cause i'm that kind of guy = P
 
2004-09-19 10:25:54 PM  
dumbass amweicans...what's next? parading sacntily-dressed goats across a stage to be judged?

...oh, wait...wrong thread
 
2004-09-19 10:26:12 PM  
That was nice. Now where are my boobies?
 
2004-09-19 10:28:45 PM  
amweicans = Americans

sowwy, Stwongbad
 
2004-09-19 10:32:46 PM  
BloodyPuppy: this isn't victorian england. the majority of men throughout history have had long hair. only in modern times, mostly western civilizations, have men kep their hair shorter.
Might as well make your woman wear a corset so your waists don't look similar. societal standards appeal only to those that buy into them."


And we live in modern times, and in a western civilization.

Thus, if your a female, grow that shiat out. If your a male, keep that shiat short.

Cody
 
2004-09-19 11:21:34 PM  
Short hair on chicks is hot. Much less bland and traditionalistic. Shows a sense of adventure.
 
2004-09-19 11:23:54 PM  
What? If your wife is "very into pageants", she'd know that Miss America is held in September, Miss World is held in December, Miss USA is held in February, Miss Universe is held in May, and Miss Teen USA is held in August. It's the same every year. What pageant was she watching last night if it wasn't Miss America?

I was held in July. I didn't place, but I got some lovely parting gifts.

Thanks, Mesmer, you set me up for that.
 
2004-09-19 11:34:47 PM  
youre all missing the point, Miss Mass is the only NORMAL looking one of the bunch
 
2004-09-19 11:36:16 PM  
Holy Cow, Drue, thats my DENTIST. Dr Chainn-Fan Gibson. Wheatland Dental, Naperville, IL!
 
2004-09-19 11:43:49 PM  
Miss Alabama? I'd Bam her!

[image from thecountrygourmet.com too old to be available]
 
2004-09-20 12:01:47 AM  
freda neato

I happen to really like girls with short hair. In fact, it's one of the things that originally attracted me to my girlfriend. It takes the right kind of face and neck for it to look good, but when it works... wow.

To all you guys who categorize all short hair as "boy haircuts" I have to ask you: Why do you want to cover up a beautiful face and neck with hair? I mean, you don't seem to want the legs or the cooter covered with it.

And besides, short cut does not equal boy cut. If any of you guys think that Miss Florida's cut is even close to as common on guys as it is on girls, then you're either naive or stupid.
 
2004-09-20 12:02:40 AM  
Arg...deliver yer booty...

/yes, 4 minutes late for pirate day...give me a break.
 
2004-09-20 12:03:26 AM  
Wow. Do they go out of their way to NOT have hotties in this thing?
 
2004-09-20 12:12:41 AM  
Not reading the thread if it's been said already...

Start another thread, list them all, lock posting and have the farkers vote to see who wins.
 
2004-09-20 12:18:24 AM  
yes pyro messiah, otherwise it wouldn't be "classy"
 
2004-09-20 12:35:30 AM  
vincentfox

"If I wanted to date someone who looked like a guy, well I would just date a guy. Straight men like women who look like women, one aspect of which usually includes includes long hair."

[image from pslashg.org too old to be available]

Woman?

[image from php.indiana.edu too old to be available]

Man?

Apparently, we men are really stupid and lazy. We are unable to tell a woman from a man using such secondary sex characteristics as the presence or absence of breasts, the femininity of the face, the width of the shoulders and hips, etc. We are totally fooled by haircuts. Keep this in mind ladies. We're idiots who are really easy to manipulate with simple visual gimmicks.

/only half kidding
//And btw, vincentfox, I hope you'd hit the right one above. ;-)
 
2004-09-20 12:42:41 AM  
that swimsuit makes her look like she is packing; um you know. ecklestain!
 
2004-09-20 12:46:48 AM  
13ItemsInA12ItemOrLessLane

When did they start wearing string bikinis and why wasn't I informed?

They started wearing string bikinis when speedo signed a contract with the pageant, and we notified you in an email with the subject heading of "Penis enlargement pills, guaranteed results!" My god, don't you read ANY of your email?
 
2004-09-20 01:08:00 AM  
mesmer242 Holy smokes, you know a lot about pagents.
 
2004-09-20 01:39:20 AM  
Her teeth remind me of that Friends episode where Ross has the glow-in-the-dark bleaching.

Demon!
 
2004-09-20 02:29:15 AM  
tishykb:

Ok, so she's a cheater. The real question remains: was she a whore? Haha, dirt baby, dirt!
 
2004-09-20 02:36:30 AM  
2004-09-19 07:54:00 PM tishykb

Let me start off by saying - I don't believe a word you say about "going to high school" with this person. Name dropping on the internet is the most subtle form of attention whoring.

Given that there's the .001% chance that you ever did get within farting distance of such a person - how were you able to tell when she seemed like she was "looking down her nose" at your pathetic, insignificant, insecure ass? Did she shoot "snob-rays" or "peon-pulses" down her nose at you? And just re-read the rest of the juvenile comments you had to make and how petty your "grievances" are. Ooooh - major crime against humanity - she sneaked her assignments into pre-existing stacks of papers. You sound like Ferris Beuller's little sister. Grow up. I also find it incredible that someone could compete for valedictorian simply by turning in their papers in this manner, in addition to having their parents pay for it. I'm sure you have the receipts for this payoff? They're probably next to Whitney's crack receipts.

Prove me wrong by linking to the pics and home movies that documented your relationship to this person - however shallow and insignificant. Otherwise - get out of here with your "I knew her, she went to my high school" crap.

Sorry about that Fark - I couldn't let that go - as a modest "friend" of the "popular" kids when I was growing up, I never understood how the usual crowd I ran with had commentary identical to that, without really taking the time to get to know the very people they were judging.

As far as the "girls with short hair" thing - it works on very few girls. Catherine Bell being the Alpha female when it comes to short hair. But, if your neck is slender enough ladies, and your boobies are round enough, you can be hot as hell. If you're flat, or even think you're flat - stick with long hair. Please.
 
2004-09-20 03:27:38 AM  
***Threadjack***

Can someone please tell me how to do block letters, so I can properly thank those of you who recognize the beauty of short hair?

***End Threadjack***
 
2004-09-20 03:50:57 AM  
JohnnyontheSpot:
I know a little bit. More than the average chick, less than the average gay man. But enough to know it's spelled pageants.

(BTW, I've lurked on fark for awhile. Is it against the rules here to be a spelling nazi?) >:P

I tried to submit a Miss America article as a link last night though. My headline: Another Hurricane Ivan casuality: Miss America's Top Two. Louisiana evacuates prematurely and Alabama "wins".

Well, I thought it was funny anyway. :) Maybe next time...
 
2004-09-20 05:23:30 AM  
I can't believe my eyes. Someone has posted something about Alabama that isn't about low IQ's or incest. (Even if they did mistake Miss America for Miss USA...ah well, nobody's perfect.)

That's an even bigger accomplishment than our entry winning Miss America. ROLL TIDE!
 
2004-09-20 08:47:22 AM  
Now that's how you s'posed to drive.

/got nuthin' but dayum, she's fine
 
2004-09-20 09:14:53 AM  
 
2004-09-20 09:27:11 AM  
L.Darte: Who says inbreeding can't be pretty?

Your mama.
 
2004-09-20 09:28:17 AM  
I'll pass on the barfing, thanks.

She needs to seek treatment for anorexia.

/wants to see more NORMAL chicks...not one that eat a stick of gum then insinctivly puke up their spit.
 
2004-09-20 09:28:41 AM  
Hey Now!!!!
 
2004-09-20 09:40:36 AM  
There still is a MA pagent ? Who would of thunk it ? Anyway, I wonder how many of these so called 'perfect' gals are really psycho biatches in real life ? I say 75%, but that might be low.
 
2004-09-20 09:42:38 AM  
seriously...everyone HATES the chicks that are too fat. What about the biatches that are way too SKINNY?

Personally, I find either one disgusting. I'll have my women in the happy medium category thanks.

Same goes for just about everything, including the rack. Not too big, not too small, and DEFINATLY not fake.

/is married and wife is watching...heh
 
2004-09-20 09:44:21 AM  
Butternutts, thank you so very much for that.
 
2004-09-20 09:52:15 AM  
Atreyou40

I really did go to high school with her. The musicals we did-- as in, she was on stage, i was a techie, y'know built stuff and whatnot- together were Once Upon a Mattress, The Pajama Game, and Kiss Me Kate. The director was Mike Bodolosky, technical director Big Al -- he was as big as a troll- and the chorus director was Kim Rauch who is now in charge of it all cuz Bodo handed it over to him. Kim also plays organ at my church, Mt. Calvary Luthern on Scalp Ave.

I never said i was in the same grade as her, because i wasn't, but being in the music department - chorus, she did both chorus and orchestra, directed by Winsome Garland, with whom i spent a lovely night in toronto hospital with my friend holly sick as a dog-- we were around each other enough and well i was simply not impressed with her attitudes toward anyone who couldn't get her something she wanted.

her boyfriend Jason played Sax in the marching band, and his sister Jessie stole my computer once to have cybersex in a chatroom Kangachat.. if anyone knows what that was, it was probably 10 years ago. Jessie now works as a waitress at Denny's, and i'm glad to say i'm still ok friends with her even tho i don't see her too often.

also, vicky's twin brother David was a wanna be skater jackass and was awful at playing cards in Mrs Sloat's study hall with me.

And well honestly i don't give a shiat if you don't beleive me. just don't beleive all these girls are miss honesty, cuz they aren't.
 
2004-09-20 10:15:22 AM  
proton

Butternutts, thank you so very much for that.



np... but, gave the wrong link..[image from offshore.ipbhost.com too old to be available]

the girl in that thread is Hazel Serrano.. Who, imo, is probably hotter anyways...lol


here's a link to Mindy Vega....bottom of thread - and again, N-S-F-W...

[image from img47.exs.cx too old to be available]
 
2004-09-20 10:19:39 AM  
 
2004-09-20 10:20:58 AM  
That's the best they can do?

Hell, if they care are about ratings, they could start by not giving the title to a complete dog.
 
fnj
2004-09-20 10:37:51 AM  
Darth Vader wants his helmet back. Meanwhile, I'd hit Miss Florida repeatedly.
 
2004-09-20 11:05:09 AM  
butternuts


WHAT THE FARK ARE YOU DOING?????!

YOU CAN'T POST THAT CRAP IN THE THREAD.

SOME OF US ARE AT WORK!!!!!!

CHRIST ON A UNICYCLE, MAN!

enjoy your bannination.
 
2004-09-20 11:39:48 AM  
Can someone please post that picture of the fat guy typing at the computer about "I would definetly NOT hit it. Look at her knees...they are way too sharp"

I was telling my friend about that pic and now I can't find one to show him.
 
2004-09-20 11:43:17 AM  
hawhaw

Seriously, most of those chicks dress like hicks. I can't explain it, but it's absolutely true. If you go to an average beach I would find at least 10 people I'd rather have sex with than anyone in the swimsuit competition. Makeup and weird feathered hair? Yuck, dude.

None of these biatches are hot, even a little.
 
2004-09-20 12:48:18 PM  
Shouldn't you be working then Socodog, instead of wasting company time browsing funny news sites?

You're fired!!!
 
2004-09-20 01:35:17 PM  
Alabama needs more boobage.
 
2004-09-20 02:12:26 PM  
socodog, I'm not sure I understand what you're saying. Does your employer search through the hundreds of images in your Internet file cache? Are you just a tattletale, piping up to try to get the other user banned? Or are you dumb enough to browse the Internet in plain view of other coworkers, who are close enough to see that 113x165 pixel image?
 
2004-09-20 03:16:19 PM  
You don't post NSFW stuff in the thread. Them's the rules.

I don't make 'em.
 
2004-09-20 04:24:09 PM  
Great site, popups, but lots of free mindy vega pictures. N.S.F.W.
 
2004-09-20 05:09:17 PM  
nightwing rutjob - Who IS that girl and where do I find the bottom half of that photo. Woof!
 
2004-09-20 05:25:31 PM  
I quietly give thanks, everyday, to who or whatever created the universe. I give thanks for that fact that I'm a well adjusted, red blooded, straight man and can happily enjoy the simple pleasure of appreciating the beauty of a good lookin' woman. It's blinkin' great being a bloke.
 
2004-09-20 06:11:49 PM  
twistedfark. you're a good guy.
 
2004-09-20 07:28:28 PM  
gastrognome

Her name is Rebekah Teasdale.

Here's the whole image:

NSFW

and here's a bonus one:

NSFW

You can get tons more (I know I did) through the usual channels (i.e. GIS and whatnot). Enjoy!
 
2004-09-20 07:49:47 PM  
My bad... linked the wrong pic, tried to edit it, but, couldn't figure out how... justr deleted the pic from the image shack file.


sorry everyone..
 
2004-09-20 09:28:27 PM  
She's got some nice big talents.
 
2004-09-20 09:32:50 PM  
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH​H​HHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Had my fappin' wand out, and then hit next. It was John Friggin' Kerry in the next pic. Think I sprained something getting that 'insta-inny'!!

/fappin to flappin
 
2004-09-21 06:32:06 AM  
I know the rules Socodog I've been here long enough, then again there are rules of common sense that apply when looking thru a boobies link on work time. Oh no nsfw banner, these must be workplacesafe boobies, duh.

Just because you're upset you got 'caught' doing something you aren't supposed to be doing at work is no reason to try and misplace the blame on someone else dude.
 
2004-09-21 04:57:43 PM  
Kalkin

He didn't necessarily get caught. There's just the threat of it. The rule does exist for a reason you know. This is sort of like telling a woman she deserved to be raped for walking in a bad neighborhood at night. Yes, I'm exaggerating, but the analogy fits.

Also

"Oh no nsfw banner, these must be workplacesafe boobies, duh."

What the hell are you talking about? It was a nudie pic posted directly into the thread. There wasn't exactly an opportunity for a warning.
 
2004-09-22 04:34:11 PM  
Someone always posts a nsfw picture in the comments on boobies links Nightwing Rutjob.

Clicking anywhere near a boobies link at work should be all the warning any person needs.

I'm all for a person's right to risk their job by browsing potentially dangerous sites and threads at work, but once you choose to take the chance the fault is yours, not some idiot who breaks or chooses to ignore a rule.

And I'm not even going to attempt to argue your analogy in a public venue. It's far too volatile a topic to be used as any kind of dispassionate analogy. Bad choice.
 
2004-09-22 10:48:40 PM  
Kalkin

With all due respect, no they don't... at least not by the loose definition of work safety that Fark uses. I've glanced through dozens and dozens of boobies threads and have seen only a handful where a true nsfw pic was posted directly into the thread... and I've seen people banned for doing it.
 
2004-09-22 11:16:32 PM  
Oh and as for the analogy, I freely admit that it's an exaggeration and that it's emotionally charged, but that's the point. As I'm sure you know, it's being used as a rhetorical tool in much the same way Santa Claus often finds his way into religious debates.

However, that nonsense about it being too volatile to be used as a dispassionate analogy is just a cop out. Analogies do not have to be dispassionate to be valid, and I believe this one is valid. I think you're just afraid that if we explore the topic, you'll come off as a boorish, mysogynistic thug. Assuming you aren't, you should have nothing to worry about. Just show why the victim isn't at fault in one circumstance and is in the other. Assuming there's something wrong with the analogy, that shouldn't be too hard.

Regardless, what it essentially breaks down to in either case is that if a person engages in risky behavior and others break the rules or laws to harm that person, it is not the fault of the person who engages in the risky behavior. Perhaps the person should not have engaged in said behavior to begin with, but that's beside the point, and it has nothing to do with ultimate guilt or responsibility.
 
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