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(Fox News)   Tinkerbell, Paris Hilton's dog, is missing. Reward of starring role in "film"   ( divider line
    More: Sad  
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12995 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Aug 2004 at 1:58 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

184 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-08-18 09:46:39 AM  

No thanks
2004-08-18 09:48:52 AM  
Reward? No, punishment.
2004-08-18 09:50:49 AM  
what do you think's in the burgers?
2004-08-18 09:52:04 AM  
Wow. I guess I'm not getting any sleep tonight knowing that poor, pitiful Paris can't afford to buy another yappy pooch.
2004-08-18 09:52:06 AM  
Your dog wants penicillin.
2004-08-18 09:52:13 AM  
I second ZeNemo.

This poor dog is going to be showing up all over teh intarweb, just like a lawn gnome.

I see P0t0sh0ps in her future. At least I hope it's a her.
2004-08-18 09:52:20 AM  
what do you think's in the burgers?

2004-08-18 09:58:55 AM  
How the fark did she lose her dog?
2004-08-18 10:00:26 AM  
i would run away if i was that dog too
2004-08-18 10:03:23 AM  
Tinkerbell the missing dog eh? Can we go to the Hunter's Guild and apply for the job of finding it for 2000 mesetas?

2004-08-18 10:04:19 AM  
That poor dog. Its not like it choose to be kept by a psycho.
2004-08-18 10:08:22 AM  
How'd she manage to lose Tinkerbell? My Chihuahua never lets me out of his sight. He'd never run off.

Of course, I don't make my dog wear stupid pink outfits either.
2004-08-18 10:08:45 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

She's kind of tiny, she'll be hard to find.
2004-08-18 10:09:35 AM  
Ooops, didn't see this greenlighted article.

As I said, she prolly sat on it and it's lost up her..

well, you know.

It was funnier the first time I typed it.

Oh, yeah

I'm A -now!!! Welcome me to the world of the cool people!@!!!
2004-08-18 10:11:03 AM  
GAwddamned filter. I meant I'm a TOTALFARKER NOW.
2004-08-18 10:15:32 AM  
I'll find it for a sloppy blowjob.
2004-08-18 10:16:22 AM  
it's nothing to be excited about. it's all about Weird Al's parents.
2004-08-18 10:19:25 AM  
A "staring" role?
[image from too old to be available]
2004-08-18 10:19:26 AM  
Has anyone seen Captain Hook?

"Where I'll send you no amount of clapping can bring you back"
2004-08-18 10:24:16 AM  
I'll find it for a sloppy blowjob.

Maybe you should pet him first.
2004-08-18 10:24:55 AM  
That slut's gotta think "You got a pet, you got a responsibility. You can't just look for an hour and call it quits. So you get your ass out there and you find that farkin' dog!"
2004-08-18 10:28:56 AM  
Well, ok, but how long would I have to stare?
2004-08-18 10:31:00 AM  
This is why it makes no sense to have a dog that can fit in your purse.

Anybody else think the dog was stolen for ransom?
2004-08-18 10:31:19 AM  
dammit honkey, what IS that from? I almost know it....
2004-08-18 10:34:56 AM  
I believe it's Billy Madison.
2004-08-18 10:35:53 AM  

Billy Madison
2004-08-18 11:10:40 AM  
I'd ransom it back to her provided she signs an agreement to NEVER appear on TV again.
2004-08-18 12:10:01 PM  
Poor girl thinks that if she gets the clap hard enough her dog'll come back.
2004-08-18 12:44:40 PM  
He ran away from home out of embarrassment.
2004-08-18 01:33:12 PM  
i wonder if she is hanging around Li'l Brudder
2004-08-18 01:45:15 PM  
if she had a real-sized dog, she'd be able to find it.

/pets his doberman, rotty & great dane
2004-08-18 01:46:42 PM  
probably out shopping for some leather pants.
[image from too old to be available]
2004-08-18 02:01:15 PM  
This was my headline: "Paris Hilton offers reward for missing dog. Anyone who has seen Nicole Richie urged to call immediately"
2004-08-18 02:02:02 PM  
Too bad it's not Paris missing.
2004-08-18 02:03:06 PM  
I'd hit it... Tinkerbell the fairy, not Paris... well maybe Paris...
2004-08-18 02:03:13 PM  
The little biatch is gone...No wait, there is Paris.
2004-08-18 02:04:30 PM  
I'd leash it.

2004-08-18 02:04:45 PM  
What's sad? That she lost her dog, or that our culture has fallen so low that we all know who Paris Hilton is?
2004-08-18 02:04:47 PM  

Phantasy Star IV??
2004-08-18 02:05:03 PM  
your headline would have been better...
2004-08-18 02:06:28 PM  
Dear Paris,

Found your dog:

[image from too old to be available]
2004-08-18 02:07:06 PM  
Morrigan Sedai...

I know that is a Phantasy Star reference.... but cant for the life of me remember from which.
2004-08-18 02:07:15 PM  
My headline was "Paris Hilton: Yo Quiero Tinkerbell".

Well, I thought it was funny.
2004-08-18 02:07:26 PM  
Why is this news?

//wishes 15 minutes would fly by faster
2004-08-18 02:08:04 PM  
I feel sorry for the dog.

Oh yeah, and I feel sorry for Tinkerbell, too.

/Thinks Paris is fugly
2004-08-18 02:08:13 PM  
if it was in her ass she'd know where it was
2004-08-18 02:08:29 PM  
i had a pet get away from me once. damn thing went right off a second story balcony. you would almost think it had a much harsher existence than the reality of being served food and lavished with attention for the half hour per day it was actually awake.

You probably didn't hear about it, though, because FOXNEWS somehow let that equally newsworthy nugget slip through the cracks.

/no paris, i said "crack's'", not "crack"
2004-08-18 02:08:41 PM  
$5000???? is that all??? That'd be the equivalent of me offering someone 1 if I lost my dog.
2004-08-18 02:08:54 PM  
Her dog's missing, but fortunately everybody has seen her cat.

/got nothing
2004-08-18 02:09:00 PM  
Kill that farking thing. Good for snake food only.
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