If only it could help me increase my social status and get me a date...

$5 a month?

A MONTH?!

How many bad dates do you have to go on to even make this thing worthwhile?

I agree with thesiver.

Are people so lazy now that we can't even think our own damn excuses?

usually when the economy is in bad shape, male-female relationships get better, or more dates

Woman need financial support you know what i mean.

The point is that you actually get a call. Without the call, your excuse would just come out of nowhere, making it harder to believe.

"What's that? Headline writers are cribbing from convention speeches? I'll be right there!"

I used to arrange for my fax to hit me at a preset time for this exact same reason... took a bit more creative acting on my part though. Good excuses usually involve someone being naked (typically a man), so the "date" has no inclination to tag along.

"Brad! BRAD! Okay, now put down the bottle, and find your pants... No, your pants... Look just hold on, I'll be there in a few minutes."

Works every time. I don't even know a Brad.

Christ, this isn't new. My friends and I have been doing this for a few years now, just for free, and it's more personal.

Quick1

Just what I was thinking! If someone finds themselves needing to get out of bad dates on such a regular basis that they're signing up to a monthly service, maybe they need to look a little closer to home to find where the problem lies...

You know, this is so old you almost expect your date's phone to ring at some point during a first date.

"I'm sorry, but I find you as attractive as Jabba the Hutt. I must leave now before I start going blind."

Or do the gentalmanly thing and drop a wad of cash on the table and bolt when she's in the can.

If your going to be a prick, stiff her with the bill.

Hasn't anyone ever heard of asking a friend to call them during a date?

Anybody have a clue on how to pick up the ladies? I have no idears.

you need doctorates in linguistics to make up a good excuse?

wow...just wow

MadSkillz

Heh. You people are pansies if you can't just tell your date "I'm sorry, but I find you as attractive as Jabba the Hutt. I must leave now before I start going blind."

I'd pay $5 to see that.

I just start farting vociferously and SHE ends the date.

When did we turn from a nation of asskickers to a nation of pusswads and losers?

that's some insistent farting, hog-nuts.

and amen to that, mmagdalene. turn. them. off.

Hide an extra cell phone in a convenient place, just in case.

Wow RabbitHeadlights I just read your bio and it is very cool. Wanna get together for a drink sometime?

I'm really going to weigh in on this one... oops, just a sec, phones ringing.

Hello! What? Not again! Stay calm and don't do anything until I get there.

Sorry, gotta go!

"Hey, this is your Escape-A-Date call. If you're looking for an excuse, I got it. Just repeat after me, and you'll be on your way! 'Not again! Why does that always happen to you? ... All right, I'll be right there.' Now tell 'em that your roommate got locked out, and you have to go let them in. Good luck!"

That's handy... unless you don't have a roommate... or they decide to tag along.

If I were with some cow, I'd hit her, just so I could, and then I'd never talk to her again.

2004-08-08 07:48:54 PM mmagdalene


If you answer your cell phone while we're on a date, you're not getting a second one anyway

Bingo.

I just have Johnny 5 listen from a distance and he changes a digital sign to what I should say.

Short Circuit 2 rocks! He really should have kept the laser.

Men...if a woman you're taking out on a date gets a call on her cell phone, you know it's going to be bad news for you. Just excuse yourself from the table (like you need to go to the restroom) and never come back....sticking her with the bill and finding a way to get home.

All this talk about women always arranging an "excuse me" call has me racking my brain to think if it ever happened to me. I'm oblivious to that kind of behavior, so I would never question its validity.

Hmm...

Think, dammit, THINK!

If you don't have a single friend who can make this call, you're not in a position to be picky about the quality of your dates.

One more thing. I'm not lame enough to have to rely on blind dates: I usually recruit them at work.

;)

Usually I've already slept with the girl long before the first actual date. Eliminates a lot of the awkwardness. YMMV

mmagdalene
If you answer your cell phone while we're on a date, you're not getting a second one anyway.

Well said, people could learn a lot from this Farkette

nerds beware...

mmagdalene - If you answer your cell phone while we're on a date, you're not getting a second one anyway.

Yeah, because nothing could possibly be important enough to merit diverting their attention from you for one minute. Get over yourself.

Anyone who needs to orchestrate a telephone call because they're not strong enough to make their own excuses or endure a few short minutes is just lame.

Of course, this service is really only for girls. If a man finds a date repulsive, he's still gonna try to f*ck her that night.

My friend and i used to do this all the time. If it was a bad date, work was calling me in to deal with somethng (in the military, they do that). If it was a good date, I made it sound like my Mom was calling to say hi (they always call at awkward times anyway, right?).

I had the speeches pretty well nailed, but each time my buddy would try to make me break character, make me laugh at something.

Friend: Is she hot man?
Me: yeah, mom, it has been warm here lately.
Friend: A Paper bag fark or a ride it till the sun shines fark?
Me: I have to get up early for work everyday, now.
Friend: Hot damn! Does she have a friend, or is she the hot friend, cause I ain't paper baggin it for ya this time.
Me: ok, I have to run now, I'll call you tonight mom.

rearden, buddy, we're talking about common courtesy here, no matter with whom you may be dining. disconnect the action from the people; it's the action mmagdalene despises, indicative of ungentlemanly, not-so-polite behavior.

get over yourself.

and bedonkadonk, thanks for the compliment of the day. i'm in nebraska, though, so i dunno how that works logistically.

/misses the shiat out of chicago

re: If you answer your cell phone while we're on a date, you're not getting a second one anyway.

whateva, hizzo.

I hate cell phone interruptions. This girl I were on a first date were on our way to a restaurant, and I was trying to get into a conversation to get to know her a little. About 10 minutes into the drive her cell phone goes off. Unbelievably she answers it and it was one of her girlfriends just calling to chit chat. So they start talking about what they both did the other night and what she bought on her shopping trip last weekend. I was soooo goddamn pissed off. I interrupted and asked her if I could say hi to her friend, she said okay and when she handed me the phone I rolled down my window and threw it out. She screams "what the f*ck!". I pulled the car over to the side of the road and said, "this date is on my time, not just yours. If you want to shoot the breeze with your girlfriends you can do it later, right now you need to focus your attention on me." She says you are a f*cking jerk!" and got out of the car to look for her phone. I hope she found it, because after she was about 20 feet behind the car I reached over, closed her door and took off. I saw her at a pub about a month later, she gave me this pissed off look but didn't talk to me. Hope she learned a lesson. Stupid b*tch.

/Im talking about you, Heather from Portland

Damn, can't people just tough it out anymore? If it's dinner, just finish up and say, "That was really nice, blah blah, blah. We'll keep in touch."

Even when my blind date ended up looking like Queen Latifah a few years ago, I still managed to get through dinner. After that, I simply avoided calls.

/Still a jerk, though

Dude3129: She was extremely rude, but that's just farking psychotic.

Isn't this what friends are for?