Yes, but she will have to help the staff by dusting one of the rooms herself.

She would have to eliminate all but one telephone and get rid of call-waiting and call-forwarding services. She also would not be able to go online with her home computer.

I think the judge should go hardball with her and force her to get rid of three-way calling and caller ID as well. And, her voice mail will be changed to: "Hi, this is Martha. I'm redecorating the Iron Bar Hotel right now and I can't take your call."

Ok, as long as her servants get to pound-her-in-the-ass every day while she showers.

she really needs to stfu

Takes away all but one phone? Lets her go online? Yeah, that's my idea of prison. Nice.

Sorry, Martha. We know you're just trying to avoid tossing salads. Now get in your hole where you belong.

funny, her balls don't look that big.

Imagine that. A person who doesn't want to go to prison.

Free Martha! Free Chong too while you're at it

Okay, as long as any other fed prisoners who want to be transferred there, can go too.

Man, the gall of some of these celebrities is amazing...she OFFERS to start her sentence at HOME? Man, lucky for her I'm not that judge.

I'd be happy to serve my prison sentence...

...at the Playboy Mansion. In fact...I'd try to get extra time for bad behavior added on to my sentence.

Scary, who at her mansion will she try to make her prison biatch ?

"Celebrities and people with $$$ get treated better. Get used to it."

That doesn't mean people won't raise hell about it and it certainly doesn't make it right.

With O.J. on the street and Martha in Prison I know our system is flawed.

You know? The only thing that truly pisses me off about the Stewart case is how she is absolutely, hopelessly convinced she deserves special treatment for being a celebrity.

Other than that, I don't give a flying pigmy f*ck.

Don't drop the decorative soap.

In fact, don't use it. It's only for guests.

When she spends her five months in home confinement, she's "only" allowed outside 48 hours a week. THAT'S TWO FULL DAYS!! Outside of going to work (which she clearly doesn't need to do), how many people normally spend that much time outside their home? That's seven hours a day. That's a farking vacation.

btw Chong is already free Ant.
I want some of whatever Martha Stewart is smoking! No way the courts are going to agree to something like this. This only serves to display her true idiocy to the general public. Get ready to feel the prison fist of justice Martha!!!!

wow another Who The Fark Cares? article.
It may be a slow newsday, but the internets a big place. must be something interesting to link to out there...

If you find any please share them.

Login: olapbill
Fark account number: 41290
Account created: 2002-06-18 13:32:45
Submitted links approved: none

Jailarity ensues.

Martha, you will also be forced to serve on poodle bathing duty.

martha is cool. lay is not.

lay will get off. the kid caught with a dirty roach clip will get a felony charge, lay will be able to hire lawyers and work with political favors.

this posting of assinine is farked up imo.

Her request is like wiping your behind before going number 2. You just don't do it.

Wizzin

I don't know what hell you are raising by posting about it on a message board on Fark.com, and it might not be right, but it's the way the world works.

Given that she's a well-known personality and has contributed to and helped society, I don't think this is unreasonable. Taking her history into account, she may be worthy of leniency.

the truth about michael moore...from bin laden himself (well, his brother)!

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,127334,00.html

2004-07-28 03:46:40 PM xero69


btw Chong is already free Ant.

Thats good, but he never should've been arrested in the first place.

I thought she was going to be a "good camper" about going to prison...

/she found out how the inmates _really_ use the tent poles

She isn't asking for her WHOLE sentence to be served in jail. RTFA people...she's asking to switch the order of her five months of jail with her five months of in home detention. That way, if she appeals and wins, she won't have spent any jail time. Which is fair. However, if she appeals and loses, she still has to serve her five months in jail--it just happens to be after her 5 months of house arrest. Also fair. Makes sense to me.

Hell, I'd try and do the same.

2004-07-28 03:52:51 PM ihatedumbpeople

the truth about michael moore...from bin laden himself (well, his brother)!

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,127334,00.html

Why would you possibly post an article about Michael Moore in a thread about Martha Stewart, outside of a desperate need for attention or trolling?

Do like the rest of us. Post it to the fark "thingee" submission and get rejected like the rest of us.

/the nerve of some people.

Martha is a seriously sick lady. Her brain does not function properly and she proved that when she told Baba Wawa what a good camper she was and how she will get through jail no prob. Now I have never been on the otherside of them rusty bars but me doubts camping is anything like doing time. Never has a camp counsellor asked me to bend forward and cough.

/Hey martha the pilot lights out on your stove

She broke the law. Not only should they instantly ship ber butt to prison, but due to this assinine request, the judge should triple the sentence. Oh, and instead of the country club she was supposed to go to, send her to the female version of Oz.

lock her ass in the barn and leave her there for 4 months

punishment over

JarHeadBinks wrote:
Okay, as long as any other fed prisoners who want to be transferred there, can go too.
Nice, I like yer thinkin.

I wonder if they could get her transferred to that nutcase in Arizona with his "tent city" prison.

Anyway though, if she's being sent to a federal prison they'll just stick her in one of those comfy minimum security prisons that they keep for the white-collar criminals - you know, the ones with golf courses...

restricted to one of the buildings...allowed to leave the estate 48 hours per week, but only for work, grocery shopping, religious services and medical appointments.

Omitting the religious part, this sounds about like my lifestyle right now. But I don't remember getting convicted of anything.

I bet she has a stroke.

Help me here. What's the big deal if she does house arrest first then jail time? She still does the jail time just later.

/confused

this may be wrong of me, but I really hope that smug biatch gets a severe beatdown when she serves her time.
a little humility would be "a good thing"

my exact question Elroyone...see my above post

Elroyone

As I understand it, she was suggesting that INSTEAD of jail time, then combined with house arrest.

The domestic diva has offered to begin serving her 10-month sentence at her sprawling home in Bedford, Westchester County, according to three sources familiar with the matter.

Stewart is supposed to serve five months in prison and then five months in home confinement.

So... she's basically asking for all house arrest, not 1/2 jail 1/2 house arrest.

*amused*

Why is a convicted felon making deals with prosecutors?

Call a cop, cuff her, and haul her ass to jail RIGHT NOW. For farks sake.

Elroyone:

if that is what she was truly wishing to accomplish then, FINE

but, she is trying to get out of serving ANY time by hanging out in her mansion while her very well paid lawyers try to get her off the hook by requesting a new trial

/i would gladly serve 5 months in a minimum security prison and be million$ richer when all is said and done

roll_in_zee_hay

Could be that too. Maybe she wants to do the house arrest first.

Confusing...

Frankly, I think martha got a really bad deal on this one.

Seriously, they are just stringing her up.

Ken Lay is still a free man, thats disgusting.

He'll probably remain one.

I think this should be allowed; they should move all the prisoners who are released due to overcrowding to her house. Send the guys from "Oz" to her estate. I think that's the gist of that show "Method and Red."

But I suppose it's fair if she serves her whole term at home as long as they give her a big burly dike roommate that sodomizes her with a splintery broom handle on a daily basis. Now that's justice!