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(Some Guy)   Scottish scientist to create first artificial black hole. A BLACK HOLE. What the hell is he thinking?   ( divider line
    More: Interesting  
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11099 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jan 2002 at 12:17 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

121 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-01-24 12:19:56 PM  
Still no cure for cancer...sigh.
2002-01-24 12:20:28 PM  
Pah - old news. I've got one of these in my overdraft.
2002-01-24 12:21:19 PM  
must. find. farside. comic.
2002-01-24 12:23:11 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-01-24 12:24:16 PM  
Yes folks, I'm that good.

Just kidding, I sold my soul to google.
2002-01-24 12:24:40 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

Not bad....make it BIGGER next time!
2002-01-24 12:25:21 PM  
This is super cool, though.

Haha! See what I did there?! "Super... cool"!

And it wasn't even deliberate!

Haha! I kill me! "Super cool"! Hahahaa!
2002-01-24 12:25:24 PM  

A Black Hole? That's so last month. heh

The Canadian's have already created the first in-lab Super Nova.
2002-01-24 12:26:45 PM  
oh yeah, this will end well.
2002-01-24 12:29:11 PM  
Goatman264: congratulations on your new joke. i hope you'll both be veery happy.
2002-01-24 12:29:47 PM  
Ok so first, blackholes don't exist. Now they're going to try and simulate one in a lab. What are they going to try and simulate next? Good fruitcake?
2002-01-24 12:30:31 PM  
We already have one Black Hole in the Northern Hemisphere, but thankfully so far it has been contained by our president's skull....god bless him.
2002-01-24 12:31:47 PM  
You know, the wonderful thing about text is that there's no need to repeat yourself. NO NEED TO REPEAT YOURSELF.
2002-01-24 12:31:57 PM  
Probably trying to make a place to put the Brittish.
2002-01-24 12:32:27 PM  
Ooh, is that where Guinness comes from? Mmmm... 140 weight goodness...
2002-01-24 12:32:37 PM  
10-4 good buddy.
2002-01-24 12:33:28 PM  
So much for Harmonia...
2002-01-24 12:34:09 PM  
Last words: "Ok everybody, grab something and hang on. I'm throwing the switch!"
2002-01-24 12:34:11 PM  
Dammit! I'm at work, so I can't get an actual image. Use your imagination...

*insert Blow-up African American Sex Doll here*

Obviously not the first "first artificial black hole"...

*books ticket to hell*
2002-01-24 12:34:22 PM  
Thanks, Whorehouse. I think this could be the start of a beyoooootiful friendship!


You're not...

jealous are you?
2002-01-24 12:35:08 PM  
a machette. A MACHETTE!
2002-01-24 12:37:00 PM  
For this imagine Ross Perot in a kilt, with a Scottish accent: "Now that huuuuge sucking sound you hearrrd is..."
2002-01-24 12:37:04 PM  
Ummm... he hasn't done it yet, it's just mental masturbation.
2002-01-24 12:37:20 PM  
Dear Dr. Ulf,
Please don't destroy the Universe until I'm done with it.
2002-01-24 12:37:53 PM  
UH, HELLO!! Wasn't the "black hole theory" disproven in an article posted last week?
2002-01-24 12:38:33 PM  
"At the event horizon - the rim of a voracious black hole - dimensions as we know them disappear." i think i saw this in porn video, once.
2002-01-24 12:39:15 PM  
Phxtony: Aaaaagh! AAAAAAAAGH!
2002-01-24 12:39:43 PM  
another Jasker Power System gone bad.
2002-01-24 12:40:30 PM  
Did anyone actually read this? They're not actually creating a black hole, but using frozen light emulating what happens at the event horizon of one. In order to create a large enough gravitational field to spark a black hole you'd need a little more mass than we currently have at our disposal.

Black Hole. I'll show you a black hole.
2002-01-24 12:41:30 PM  
Dude ... like, we're sooo dead.

I've got a head like a black hole.
2002-01-24 12:42:07 PM  
So if you suddenly blink out of existence, at least now you will know what happened. Or not.
2002-01-24 12:44:55 PM  
wasn't this the plot of about 50 movies so far?

Xgxlx Good fruitcake? isn't that Wil Wheaton?

"we're swichng to Ludicrous Speed, Lord Helmet"
2002-01-24 12:45:00 PM  
But dude, if you like, freeze light and shiat ... whoah, dude.
2002-01-24 12:46:35 PM  
old hat... already been done...
for the [image from too old to be available]
2002-01-24 12:47:13 PM  
I sure hope it doesn't get out of the lab...
2002-01-24 12:48:18 PM  
(_._) I read it, but it's funnier to talk about making a black hole. Never let the truth stand in the way of comedy.
2002-01-24 12:48:20 PM  
however, a personal black hole would make a sweet trash can.
2002-01-24 12:50:06 PM  
It's already happened. Think about your life. Is it REALLY the same as it was yesterday? Or even five minutes ago? WHO are these people? WHAT are you really doing there? JUST WHAT IN THE HELL DO YOU THINK THIS IS ALL ABOUT?
2002-01-24 12:50:22 PM  
Why does this worry anyone? Any black hole somehow created in a lab would have a tiny mass, and therefore a tiny event horizon and an imperceptible gravitational pull.
2002-01-24 12:51:36 PM  
Didn't the professor do this same thing on Gilligan's Island with three coconuts and a banana leaf?
2002-01-24 12:52:57 PM  
In other news:
Cover band Noisefarm to recreate Black Old Sun, Scientologists feeling squeamish.
2002-01-24 12:54:40 PM  

Kind of strange, just as i scanned my eyes over this article my stereo blared out "Head like a hole, black as your soul!" Good 'ol NIN.

Xgxlx, stephen hawking has mathematically proved that higher dimensions indeed do exist. Choose to believe it or not, its up to you.
2002-01-24 12:56:05 PM  
I'm going to be the first to finger his artificial black hole.
2002-01-24 12:56:19 PM  
"I read it, but it's funnier to talk about making a black hole. Never let the truth stand in the way of comedy."


I do believe that I've seen gas occasionally escape from a black hole. Well, maybe not seen, but certainly smelled...
2002-01-24 12:56:35 PM  
They'd better watch what they're doing.
[image from too old to be available]
2002-01-24 12:57:37 PM  
Man, nobody seems to read the article. Rev Jim at least admits that he's doing it for comedy's sake. But jesus people. Blacksmithking here has no idea what he's talking about. Hate to call you out, man, but that's just dumb. The whole point of a black hole is that you have to have something hella massive. There's no such thing as a "tiny" black hole.

Light stops when it hits the event horizon. It emits Hawking radiation when that happens. We want to study Hawking radiation, but we can't go to a black hole. So, we stop light with a different method. There's no black hole making going on in the lab. We're just stopping light to see what happens when it hits a black hole.

Read, folks.
2002-01-24 01:03:29 PM  
If Hawking is so cool, why's his pussy-ass in a whellchair?
2002-01-24 01:06:05 PM  
Greenhornet's mom: [stares blankly] "What.. are.. you.. talking about..? I'm.. fine.. We're all fine.."

[also staring blankly] " She's right, son. Give Zargon... er your.. Mom... a hug.
2002-01-24 01:06:58 PM  
TLBreer, you'd think if he was so smart, he'd learn to walk.
2002-01-24 01:08:09 PM  
Does any of you cretins know that book by Greg Bear? Nice SF story about some 'scientist' who 'accidentally' have created a black hole what seems to descend into the earth's core and thus causing a large oooops effect?

Must read.
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