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(NCBuy)   Four-legged telepathic football terrorizes Chile   ( divider line
    More: Scary  
•       •       •

5655 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jan 2002 at 9:48 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

58 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-01-24 09:51:28 AM  
Would make for a more interesting game.
2002-01-24 09:52:06 AM  
i think someone put too much spice in the Chile.
2002-01-24 09:52:16 AM  
marking chile off of my list of places I can safely go to o_o
2002-01-24 09:52:44 AM  
but is Fb- the father? curious minds want to know...
2002-01-24 09:55:43 AM  
FatNutZ: I think that's exactly what you get when Fb- is the father.

And Chile is now supposed to be one of the more stable nations down there? Yikes.
2002-01-24 09:59:44 AM  
Viva la Chupacabra!
2002-01-24 10:00:49 AM  
"The winged football is just one of hundreds of strange creatures that have been terrorizing Chile since 1999 and Dr. Sanchez-Ocejo suspects the mysterious beings are entering Chile through a dimensional doorway."

Dimensional Doorway eh ? Looks like Krang might be the next one outta the doorway.
2002-01-24 10:00:55 AM  
Ay yi yi! No me gusta! El Chupacabra!
2002-01-24 10:04:04 AM  
(Cliff Voice): Yep, this looks like yer basic parallel-type dimension heah.
2002-01-24 10:07:56 AM  
It's Jeebus! Praise Allah!
2002-01-24 10:09:52 AM  
This looks like a job for...
[image from too old to be available]

If he's not too busy dealing with UFO's, Time travel, Comet Halle-Bop, Remote viewing, Cydonia, Alien abductions, The Manhattan project, Ghosts, The Yeti, Bigfoot, Nessie, Satan and Angels, Prophecies, etc...
2002-01-24 10:11:32 AM  
I'm pretty sure they have all of their facts straight. I mean it only makes sense.
2002-01-24 10:12:02 AM  
I wonder if its related to the 4 legged telepathic baseball that just beat me up?
2002-01-24 10:14:45 AM  
One of these was in my room talking to me for eight hours straight, once. It keeps appearing every now and again, too, and it's weird, it must be telepathic. I'll tell you why - it's trying to do my head in - it only comes when I'm on acid!

Weird, eh?
2002-01-24 10:15:08 AM  
2002-01-24 10:17:51 AM  
"Paranormal researcher Dr. Virgilio Sanchez-Ocejo isn't sure if the creature is one of those goat-sucking chupacabras, but admits both animals telepathically communicate with humans.

"The winged football is just one of hundreds of strange creatures that have been terrorizing Chile since 1999 and Dr. Sanchez-Ocejo suspects the mysterious beings are entering Chile through a dimensional doorway."

I was thinking to myself, this is pretty funny. Then they bring in a renowned scientific mind, and he admits that this creature (along with the infamous and terrifying chupacabra) is telepathic... Oh, the horror. I'm going to put on my tinfoil hat and finish my radio wave proof bomb shelter now.
2002-01-24 10:19:39 AM  
I got a question. When they say football do they really mean soccer ball down there? I don't think it really matters much but you never know I might be standing next to a football and a soccer ball and I turn my back on the soccer ball for a second. Thats when it grows legs and attacks me. My last dying thoughts would be 'aaaahhh I should've known it was the soccer ball!'

okay back to work...
2002-01-24 10:19:47 AM  
Goatman, have you ever been visited by the Chupacabra?
2002-01-24 10:22:29 AM  
Maybe its the quality of the ganja out there has declined since 1999, causing all the sightings?
2002-01-24 10:22:35 AM  
Finkboy: Not yet, though my master tells me that there is time yet, my pretty...

I dunno what he means by it, but it sounds pretty cool.
2002-01-24 10:23:48 AM  
I think the Chupacabra only visits you when you're down in the islands and taking some of those wonderful island elixirs. The you better watch your ass.
2002-01-24 10:24:38 AM  
To think I thought the gateway to another dimention was in New Jersey all this time.
2002-01-24 10:26:15 AM  
Damn, they must be shipped from New jersey's dimensional doorway to Chile.

Makes an odd kinda "6 dollar an hour" sense.
2002-01-24 10:27:18 AM  

Zounds! Beat me by this much!

*holds fingers two minutes apart*
2002-01-24 10:27:33 AM  
I wish I had a nice chair like Art Bell. I have this, like this old office chair that hurts my ass. I think working 8 hours a day in this chair is misshaping my ass in freakish ways.
What was all this about a talking football?
2002-01-24 10:29:09 AM  
That's amazing! I wasn't aware that the Chilean diet consisted largely of moldy rye bread. Let the visions begin!!!
2002-01-24 10:30:32 AM  
Isn't a football with legs a Kiwi bird? Lets everyone get a hunting license and kill us some football!
2002-01-24 10:31:55 AM  
This sounds like a bad X-Files episode. Sorry, ANY X-Files episode. By the time it's all done the same conclusions will be drawn. None.
2002-01-24 10:34:24 AM  
Note to Self: Shut down top secret chimera-producing genetic lab in Chile.
2002-01-24 10:37:55 AM  
If we can't have farms that have four-legged telepathic footballs for us to stomp on at random, then the terrorists have indeed won
2002-01-24 10:38:22 AM  
well i'll start watching football now
2002-01-24 10:42:19 AM  
A dimentional door in his head!
2002-01-24 10:42:51 AM  

Smile for the chimera.
2002-01-24 10:49:05 AM  
Icecycle: With which head?
2002-01-24 10:50:37 AM  
illiterate & poor = dimensional portals.
I think demons from other dimensions are just attracted to them.
2002-01-24 10:50:54 AM  
Is Mephisto down there? Have they seen any four assed monkeys?
2002-01-24 10:53:21 AM  
They said it is shaped like a rugby football, sorry to burst your bubble.
2002-01-24 10:56:11 AM  
Ph'hglui mglw'nafh four-legged-rugby-ball R'lyeh Wgah'nagl fhtagn!
2002-01-24 10:57:20 AM  
I have been wondering for years whether this phenomina was related to the old west legend of the murder cow (or murder calf, whatever).

A telepathic rugby football would make for an exotic pet, when I get rich I want one.
2002-01-24 10:58:56 AM  
"It had a face like a bulldog
Well does that scare You?
[image from too old to be available]
2002-01-24 11:00:29 AM  
Clatu verata nic *cough*
2002-01-24 11:02:24 AM  
WARNING: Do not use if pregnant or nursing. If you have, or have a family history of, heart disease, thyroid disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, recurrent headaches, depression or other psychiatric condition, glaucoma, difficulty in urinating, prostate enlargement, or seizure disorder, consult a health care provider before using this product. Do not use if you are using monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOI) or for 2 weeks after stopping an MAOI drug; certain drugs for depression, psychiatric or emotional conditions; drugs for Parkinson's disease; methyldopa; or any product containing ephedrine, pseudoephedrine or phenylpropanolamine (ingredients found in allergy, asthma, cough/cold and weight control products). Stop use and call a health care professional immediately if dizziness, severe headache, rapid and/or irregular heartbeat, chest pain, shortness of breath, nausea, noticeable changes in behavior or loss of consciousness occur. Discontinue use at least two weeks prior to surgery. Exceeding recommended dosage or consuming product with caffeine, may cause serious adverse health effects, including heart attack, and stroke. The maximum recommended dosage of ephedrine for a healthy adult human is no more than 100 mg in a 24-hour period for not more then 12 weeks.

Please Recycle

From the back of a can of Metab-o-life. Only $1.99 at finer 7-11's everywhere.

They just didn't follow the rules...
2002-01-24 11:03:23 AM  
Who just thinks they taunted happy fun ball?
2002-01-24 11:24:52 AM throw a "Chilean" on the front of "UFO Research Insititute" and it suddenly sounds like an academic powerhouse.

" dumbass...that's not an's one of them common yeller-bellied scarlet-throated goat suckers..."
2002-01-24 11:35:08 AM  
Sheseala: Funny you should say that. There used to be a "Happy Fun Ball" account on Fark. Haven't seen him or her in a while. Hmmmmm.....
2002-01-24 11:35:42 AM  
Somebody please Photoshop this thing.

Praise The Chupacabra.
2002-01-24 11:48:07 AM  
2002-01-24 12:00:06 PM  
Thank God somebody finally found Fluffy. Is there a number I can call to get him back home?
2002-01-24 12:04:38 PM  
Fierce, isn't it?
[image from too old to be available]
2002-01-24 12:12:26 PM  
Used tampons make great red-ink filler in a pinch...tell em it turns brown as a publicity gag
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