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(   Man celebrates his 23rd birthday by being arrested while also covered in tasty goodness of nacho cheese   ( divider line
    More: Weird  
•       •       •

13770 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jul 2004 at 8:14 AM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

64 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-07-19 07:30:41 AM  
And the police captured him and pronounced "It's not 'cho cheese. You're under arrest!"

/thank you and I'll be here all morning for your entertainment
2004-07-19 07:52:35 AM  
That would've made a better headline. But I'll live with what we got now.
2004-07-19 08:04:37 AM  
See? See that everybody? Now THAT is how you celebrate a birthday. Cake with family, meh!

Any birthday that leaves you drunk on vodka and covered with nacho cheese, well, THAT is a birthday you'll remember. Well, sorta remember based on the police report.
2004-07-19 08:07:00 AM  
Youth is wasted on the young.

2004-07-19 08:19:54 AM  
Bah, who hasnt drunk themselves silly on their 23rd birthday ,taken a cheese dip bath and begun a lifelong profession as a thief while nude?
2004-07-19 08:24:13 AM  
He also took a dump in the garbage can! Where do you think his friends were? If he acted alone, that's one sad, sad human being, drinking and looting snack bars on his own. That should be a group activity.
2004-07-19 08:27:01 AM  
TSG needs to find his mugshot
2004-07-19 08:29:51 AM  
Did that party start with his freinds saying, "okay, I'll pay you $100.00 if you...............
2004-07-19 08:30:42 AM  
Doesn't bail of $9,300 seem somewhat excessive in relation to the seriousness of the crime?
2004-07-19 08:34:07 AM  
Not if he's part of the prophecy, mc frontalot.

Keep that in mind, ok??

/i'm not nuts
2004-07-19 08:36:25 AM  
No salsa? That is criminal.
2004-07-19 08:40:32 AM  
I think I just turned gay.
2004-07-19 08:40:49 AM  
They found an open bottle of vodka in his jeep? Wouldn't have expect that...
2004-07-19 08:41:21 AM  
Nacho cheese?? I wanna dip my balls in it.

/The State
2004-07-19 08:53:18 AM  
The power of cheese.
2004-07-19 08:57:04 AM  
2004-07-19 08:58:00 AM  
Pssshhh... I was only 19 when the cops came to my house and thought I had killed everyone I live with because I was covered in ketchup.

Good advice: Don't get really drunk and try to follow a recipe with your radio on as loud as it will go, you end up dropping your beer when you answer the door at 6am to a cop pointing his gun at your chest.
2004-07-19 08:59:39 AM  
It seemed funny and fairly harmless until I got to the part where he defacated in the garbage can.... ewwww
2004-07-19 09:00:15 AM  
I often have late night drunken nacho cravings... But I just go to 7-11, not break into a pool snack bar :)
2004-07-19 09:00:35 AM  
Unavailable for comment.
[image from too old to be available]
2004-07-19 09:05:00 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-07-19 09:10:12 AM  
Tikifishiat seemed funny and fairly harmless until I got to the part where he defacated in the garbage can.... ewwww

Could have been worse. Could have done it in the ice machine!

/ BT - DT
2004-07-19 09:20:03 AM  
Now that's a guy that knows how to party.
2004-07-19 09:28:24 AM  
police said they found him early Sunday running nude from the John Sevier pool snack bar with a box of stolen snacks.

Alright, remember the drill. Go straight for the crispy crackly ones! Don't waste your time on 'dem plain ol' chocolates. Those things are fool's gold!
2004-07-19 09:29:31 AM  
It's nacho cheese, it's mine...
2004-07-19 09:33:17 AM  
Cheese Fondon't
2004-07-19 09:36:57 AM  
Naked Man? is that you??
2004-07-19 09:39:46 AM  
Well, I know what I'm doing tonight.
2004-07-19 09:47:34 AM  
$7 of nacho cheese? I hope he didn't have to open those little plastic cups like they give you at Taco Bell.
2004-07-19 09:53:35 AM  
Wasted guy scaled an eight foot wall.
Impressive when considering he was nekkid and cheese covered.
The cops were quoted as saying "drop the chips" which explains the trash can. Also, he'll be Frito lay in the county jail.
/sorry bad pun
2004-07-19 09:54:19 AM  
"According to Maryville police, Michael P. Monn, born July 18, 1981, of McCall Road, Maryville..."

This news-item brought to you by the letter 'M'.
2004-07-19 09:57:10 AM  
I really hope that he came from a party and didn't get that wasted by himself.
2004-07-19 10:03:27 AM  
Think KFC is still open?
2004-07-19 10:06:51 AM  
Not to get off the subject, but is anyone else falling in lust with those girls advertising "Dusty" brand shirts??
2004-07-19 10:19:02 AM  
2004-07-19 09:10:12 AM xarlos
Could have been worse. Could have done it in the ice machine!

Ha! that brings back memories. for my 21st birthday (about 3 years ago), some friends "kidnapped" me and took me to a strip club in Ohio (ahh, full nudity strip bars, truly nature's wonderland). Anyway, after we closed the place down, we checked into a motel 6 next door for the night and drank and drank and drank. About 4am, I had to get something out of my friend's car, and realized when i got there that i had to pee really, really bad, and i was on the other side of the building. I looked around and the only thing even remotely usable to my rum-addled mind was the ice machine under the staircase. Yep, everyone who got ice that day had an extra piece of me. Since that day, I refuse to use ice from a motel ice machine.
2004-07-19 10:32:12 AM  
joeface, i second that motion
2004-07-19 10:36:44 AM  

You are a farking scumbag. No amount of drinks could ever make a sane, non-trashy person ever do anything like that. And this is coming from the guy that almost got Diallo'd at 6am covered in ketchup.
2004-07-19 10:38:47 AM  
Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three..
2004-07-19 10:50:14 AM  
I wonder if his parents will clip out the article and put it on the fridge. You know, like a friendly reminder...
2004-07-19 11:08:14 AM  
in other news, Fark is farking slow today...
2004-07-19 11:11:19 AM  
Ladies and Gentlemen,
I think we have come up with a redneck pentathlon. It goes like this. Contestants will be timed to see how fast they can do the following events in order:

1. Chug a bottle of vodka
2. Strip down and cover themselves in Nacho cheese
3. Steal food from the snack bar
4. Scale an 8 foot fence
5. Take a dump in a garbage can

Winner receives a small prison sentence and life long celibacy.

What do you all think?
2004-07-19 11:21:38 AM  
Nacho, nacho man...I want to be your nacho man. Sing along!
2004-07-19 11:53:38 AM  

2004-07-19 11:59:07 AM  
Vaseline guy strikes again!
2004-07-19 12:18:06 PM  
Wow. Well done sir. That man is a legend.
2004-07-19 12:20:57 PM  
2004-07-19 12:23:00 PM  
Oh, and Blazer83?

Yes. Most definitely.

And did anyone see how happy Storm was surrounded by SBB Boobies?
2004-07-19 12:24:03 PM  
AHHHHHHH yes, I can remember running naked covered in dairy products on my 23rd B-day like it was just yesterday.
2004-07-19 12:39:46 PM  
drunk-peeing is definitely the worst, though. Your senses are so impaired you don't get the initial warning tinglings. I'll be calmly stumbling home when my entire lower half threatens to a splode.

/took a piss in front of UVA's medical school the other night.
2004-07-19 12:57:52 PM  
"The nude male had a strong odor of alcohol and was semi-incoherent"

You know, I always thought that nacho cheese sauce could kill the smell of anything.
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