Does it ever help to say, "Please" when you're asking a girl for sex?

Farkettes?

Man, I need some bone-rattling, nerve-jangling, steam heat dripping off the walls SEX !!! I need to get laid in the WORST WAY !!! (I guess that would by while standing up in a hammock.)

Farkettes?

*Please?*

pr0n name: Honey Walter

I'd pin her legs back like a Safeway chicken

How much for a two-piece and a biscuit?

I bet those Polyphonic spreee freaks smell like old vaghina

BREAKING NEWS

July 16, 2004 21:25 GMT
Associated Press (Maryland)


Tragedy struck Friday as Air Force One burst into flames over the Atlantic Ocean, killing all aboard. President George W. Bush, along with Vice President Dick Cheney, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, deputy secretary Paul Wolfowitz, National Security advisor Condoleeza Rice, Attorney General John Ashcroft, Homeland Security Director Tom Ridge and other guests are all believed to have died, painful and gruesome deaths.


CIA satellite imagery

The last communication with air traffic control offers a glimpse of the final moments of flight for Air Force One;

"LaGuardia control, this is alpha foxtrot, we are on...[pause] hey Bob, what's that smell? Smells like burning hair, check out the cabin...[pause]...JESUS farkING CHRIST! We're on farkING FIRE! Get the extinguis...[silence]."

Mechanical failure is believed to be a factor.

The NTSB, CIA and FBI are investigating.

I wanna nail Liza Fromer in the worst way.

Porn name: Harry Ridgeway
hmmm...sounds kinda gay.

how come you never see/hear a girl fart while doing anal in pron?

I'd slip her the hot beef injection

El Bastardo

Both barrels ??

I'm going to go down to Waikiki this weekend and stare at the fine asses of tourist girls who won't sleep with me.

Read the whole damned thread up until this point. Going home now. I hope she walks the dog so I don't have to.

Want fries with that?

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen used to look like troll dolls. Now they look like grown-up troll dolls.

water is the key to life; beer is the key to life as we know it

Why didn't we let Texas secede?

It's assault with a friendly weapon

Since my boss is gone. I think I'm leaving now. Adios amigos.

Yogurt! Yogurt! I Hate Yogurt! Even with strawberries.

"testicles" should be pronounced to rhyme with "hercules."

Storage and porridge both rhyme with orange...if you have a cold.

nice optimus_prime, nice.

shazzam

DIRTY SANCHEZ!! (sorry, no picture, don't want to get banninated)

Porn name: Doc Dumaine
Tranny name: Nick Maberry

Feh.

Greg Lemond is a massive, diseased penis.
/Go Lance

off work and home now...he still has not called.

I like Works4Jah's post! Here's a pic i did in January 2003

dum dum da dum dum

"Personalllll.....Jesusssssss......"

badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger mushroom mushroom badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger

/I hope to one day learn how to post pictures in threads. I like visual aids.....

http://www.badgerbadgerbadger.com

I'm sad ESH will never read through this thread.

Iraq really was all about the oil.

Holy crap, I AM a fat American!

/denial.

Ah...... Sanchez, I knew him well......

More follow-ups to one-hit wonders:

Breakfast at IHOP Just Down the Road from Tiffany's

Lookin' for Love at match.com

I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles) From The Next Wayside That Has a Working Toilet

Four Seasons in the Sun

"I don't want to ruin our friendship." is a LAME excuse!! Be honest. You just don't want to firk me. Fine. Biatch.

Zyklon B. Goode:

Now you've got me wishing I was dating the sister of one of my best friends. She could really use the Hebrew Hottie shirt.

I don't want to vote for Bush.

My rotting tooth hurts. :( Being afraid of the dentist sucks.

pr0n name: Elvis Addison

niiiiiice

I want him dead!
I want his family dead!
I want his house bruned to the ground!

[Hoffman - Billy Bathgate]

best thread evar !

I saw a Turtle.

Well, if:

porn name = Your middle name + street you grew up on
transvestite name = Pet's Name + Mother's maiden name.

then,
my porn name is Warren Washington, and my transvestite name is Julius Caesar Gosset.

I kinda like my porn name.