It sucks to be you.

I think I have a crush on ESH, I love his humour.

Toughffff

Pamela Anderson AND Jenny Mcarthy

should i enable this for voting?

if i was a chick, i would be getting SOOOO laid tonite...hell, i'd get laid EVERY nite. Geez, I'd probably go out to the bar with a damn mattress on my back...

TheAnvil: I agree wholeheartedly. Smash Lampjaw!

Who came up with letter X? I think I am going to start a campaign against it and never use it again. Eksplanation. Zylophone. Zenophobe. Relacks. Seriously, there is no use for it. Sh*t what about x-ray? F*ck x-ray. Who needs X-ray when we have MRI now. Come on, think of something else with x in it.....need more funny stuff.....mix=micks...that was pretty stupid. Man, I'm hungry.

I'd be willing to bet the someone, somewhere, at this very moment, is trying to shove a ferret up someone else's ass. I find this strangely arrousing.

Do worms yawn ?

Things were better when I was a kid.

Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

Gotta hide the bodies...GOTTA HIDE THE --

Hey.

What's he looking at me like that for?

HE KNOWS!!

THE FLOWERS! ARE STILL! STANDING!

I actually like the movie Armageddon.

When I was 12, I used to fantasize that I was adopted and Tony Orlando was my real father. He would find me someday and put me on his show. I would be the White member of Dawn.

If it weren't for my horse, I never would have spent that year in college.

/A vote for me is a vote for Lewis Black!

what do yo u mean "last call"?

I like the girls in the SBb adds.

I remember when I was in an elephant's vagina. I was thinking, "Boy, I thought these things smelled bad on the outside!" Then I stuck my friend inside instead and pitched a tent. Yes. That one.

Is it worth the effort to make 7 new Fark accounts to win this survey????

/Islamic Militant Bukkake Kitten

Rock Hardchest!

Who stole my...

Never mind. Here it is.

I think LeaLoo should show us her boobs.

you sound like a shiate salesman with a mouthfull of samples...

Did they have to give the starring role in I, Robot to Will Smith?

"I wonder if other guys do it this way when they masturbate"

2 to 3 inches? that'd be like DOUBLE The size!......

Maybe Regular K ate a lot got fat and became Big K? Or perhaps went off to school and became Dr K?

I was the man on the grassy knoll in Dallas, November 22, 1963. But I did not shoot the deputy.

confused

The guns...they've stopped.

My wife has no idea how often I think about sex

I am the most comfortable when I am lost in obscurity.

And this. Is my BOOMSTICK!

Lisa Get outta there, Lisa! Lisa!

Names of three women in town you should not sleep with:

Jennifer Roommate
Leslie Neighbor
Cynthia Coworker

here,here

Kim Gibbler thinks you guys are whack.

Man, I bet I could have convinced the boss I was sick today just to stay home, get farked up, and play video games while listening to albums.

In other news, this sentence is false.

Okay. I'm going to slowly back out of the room now.

V-E-R-Y S-L-O-W-L-Y.......

/scared of all of you

T minus three hours until bar time...

What is the sound of one hand clapping...

I agree with Smookyfufu

Smookyfufu, got any rum?

Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

Americans don't appreciate irony.

WTF you idiot. Booze and blow sure did help seal the deal but it also did wonders for your royal limpness. Way to go, baby dick!