Well, she should have lots of time at work to freelance.

Doesn't surprise me in the slightest. We live in a country where our Attorney General's principal job is covering up clevage on statues.

I wonder what his principle job was?

And isn't there a restraining order banning him from contact with schoolchildren?

There's a special room in Hell just for him, I'm sure...

If she doesn't want the job, I'll take it. I'll even take on web-based duties, like checking out Penny Arcade and the Homestar Runner site.

I bet they make people show up at the butt-crack of dawn at that place...

dear whomever submitted this story:



that's the tag you should have used

If this happened to me, I'd start drawing buttcracks into the cartoons.

It's a pretty big task to remove the crack from the lives of today's youth.

Closing in on my dream job - airbrushing the nipples out of the Victoria's Secret catalog.

"And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were merry, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire. "

TommyymmoT
I commend you on a superb joke... keeping on quibbing

She'd better stop her biatching, because there's a lot of folks in India that'll check for buttcracks, and for a lot less money, too.

2004-07-15 01:15:04 PM holierthanthou

So are you saying she could be outsourced or just simply allowed to fall through the cracks?

yeaaaah they finally have wallpaper of the HOT dusty girls

/once again a thread jack

only thing to be said for Newsday's brass:

(_|_)

Butt sometimes it's the crack that's the butt of the joke.
Take away the crack, take away the joke - and no one will crack up.
And that's the bottom line.

She shouldn't be forced to do demeaning jobs just because her boss wants her to leave. Talk about assinine...

(_|_)

I'm surprised Newsday wasn't bought out by Grit.

2004-07-15 01:06:48 PM whidbey

There's a special room in Hell just for him, I'm sure...


It's a she (assuming you're referring to the buttcrack eraser). And given that's what she's told to do, I'm guessing she thinks she's already in hell.

Isn't Buttcracker down with Kid Rock?

Hey! I met this guy before!
He was up in Watertown covering a Labor Day event where the featured speaker was none other than Sen. Hillary Clinton. He asked a bunch of us inane questions like, "how do you feel about the possibility HRC might run for President?"

I told him I'd watch HRC shred Dumbya in a debate on Pay-Per-View.

I used to live on Long Island, and my parents still get this crap rag. Newsday is written on a 2nd grade level, and the bias is so bad you have to read it at an angle. Good for her. Edit buttcracks out of the comics and take those asshelmets for a ride.

bonno Butt sometimes it's the crack that's the butt of the joke.
Take away the crack, take away the joke - and no one will crack up.
And that's the bottom line.


i think your theory has a hole in it.

Just to play devils advocate, maybe she isn't good at her job and they want to move her on out. One past success does make her a genius. If she was really that good why not take the retirement offer and go somewhere else?

Hey! I could do that job! Sign me up!

That job would be so much better than the one I do now that it's pretty sad...

For Christmas this year I'm asking for a new butt...

The one I have right now has a crack in it...

/10 year olds love this joke...

edit this

I salute the three posters who bothered to actually read the article before posting.

Kudos.

The rear-end revelation is the latest embarrassment for Newsday, which was publicly scolded by the Audit Bureau of Circulations for inflating figures and slapped with additional allegations of fraud in a lawsuit by angry advertisers earlier this week.

Yeah, because you can fix inflated circulation figures by making sure there are no butt-cracks in the comics section.

Right?

/I don't see the connection, except to illustrate that Newsday is a bunch of ass-hats

I thought I had it bad, adding the butt cracks that the cartoonist forgot.
"For every farce there is an equal an opposite farce."
-- Spaceballs

Newsday sounds like a fun place.

It's called crack and it's delicious! You just take some cocaine and some baking soda, and I think I tasted egg and cinnamon....

2004-07-15 03:05:53 PM The Onanist


For Christmas this year I'm asking for a new butt...

The one I have right now has a crack in it...

/10 year olds love this joke...

And my grandfather...that was one of his favorite jokes.

Eric: Come on, little bro, you can walk, can't ya?
Cory: In this blizzard? I'm sure I'll just trudge all the way to school, freeze my butt off, and walk through life buttless!
Eric: Good deal!

Danny: Guys, we've got a big problem...
Joey: No, that's not a big problem. A big problem would be if, say, your butt fell off.

/gotta love the 90s family comedy butt humor!

Well, I hope she wins.

Corporate people are evil (okay, they're sociopaths, but if that's not evil...)