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(Some Guy)   The new baseball analogy for sex. We all know what second base is, but who knows what a "relief pitcher" means?   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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9958 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jan 2002 at 8:19 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

51 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-01-19 08:54:23 AM  
I know nothing!!!!!!
2002-01-19 08:56:03 AM  
2002-01-19 08:57:55 AM  
All I know is that I've been called "Long relief" before, whatever that means,,,,I don't know,,,,mumble,,mumble,,,,mmmmrrgghhfff
2002-01-19 09:02:58 AM  
I've always been called the "short man", I thought that was cause I was left-handed, could only handle one batter at a time.
2002-01-19 09:04:38 AM  
2002-01-19 09:29:13 AM  
Then her father came home......Hell of an outfielder.
2002-01-19 09:38:55 AM  
i'm the 'Player/Manager'.
2002-01-19 09:59:12 AM  
I'm the beer guy, everyone loves the beer guy. ;-)
2002-01-19 10:00:57 AM  
2002-01-19 10:15:50 AM  
What about us poor batboys?
2002-01-19 10:32:20 AM  
Shouldn't a grand slam be doing it 4 times in one day?
A quick question? Does a stolen base get you 3-5 upstate????
2002-01-19 10:34:18 AM  
Relief pitcher= a vibrator or it means you called in a friend to finsh-up after you "balked"
2002-01-19 10:48:56 AM  
How about-
OBSTRUCTION is the act of a fielder who, while not in possession of the ball and not in the act of fielding the ball, impedes the progress of any runner.

Obstruction Forgetting to remove panty hose before sliding into home.
2002-01-19 11:03:23 AM  
If for one guy first base is holding hands, then what the hell is a home run to him?
2002-01-19 11:10:21 AM  
...and where's my personal favorite: the Doubleheader?
2002-01-19 11:17:36 AM  
Relief pitcher being a vibrator? It makes no sense. The guy is the batter, the girl is the pitcher. When the guy balks (a pitching term, so it doesn't make much sense) he would rather call in a Pinch Hitter rather than a Relief Pitcher. Dig?
2002-01-19 11:30:54 AM  
What, no picture of the Diamondbacks chick followed by comments about her inside the park home run abilities? You guys are slacking. :)
2002-01-19 11:40:23 AM  
The forgot Designated Hitter:
2002-01-19 11:42:40 AM  
and all that time I thought guys were really talking about baseball....

on deck and hoping for at least a double :)
2002-01-19 11:49:30 AM  
Did anybody else find it ironic at all that the website address is lol
2002-01-19 11:50:51 AM  
How about the "infield fly rule" then?
2002-01-19 12:00:23 PM  
Cut-off player - Ask Lorena.
Wild pitch - Wrong hole. May result in ejection.
Ejection - See Wild pitch.
2002-01-19 12:30:10 PM  
Charging the mound: self-explanatory
2002-01-19 12:31:22 PM  
Come to think of it.. charging the mound could be unwanted touching.. 'cause it always results in an ejection, per Plug's definitions
2002-01-19 12:32:49 PM  
Ah...but have any of you hit back to back homers?

Ever had the runner caught in a pickle?

And I don't even want to go here, but I will...What about a Foul Tip?
2002-01-19 12:34:18 PM  
I'm with you, Albrot. That way,

masturbation is not a bunt, but batting/fielding practice (or maybe Spring Training).
A bunt becomes any lame attempt at advancing the runner.


pop-up = any erection
Texas leaguer = particularly welcome pop-up
prejac = a dribbler to whichever infielder ("sad" logo here)

spitball = assist from KY
slider = no need for spitball
change-up = uh-oh, blue balls a coming (or not)
knuckle-ball = fister? (yikes)
chin music = leftovers
beanball = that southward push on the top of your head...

umpire = anyone with ability to call the gamerain delay = coitus interruptus
rainout = ump's home--run like hell!
Ah, Bazebol! --ben bery bery good to me....
2002-01-19 12:42:06 PM  
Beanball - ouch!
Bullpen - Frat house
Cactus League - unshaved/rough.
Disabled List - Viagra candidate.
2002-01-19 01:08:21 PM  
so does stealing a base mean rape??
2002-01-19 01:17:03 PM  
How about overpaid left fielder = woman who wants too much
2002-01-19 01:34:33 PM  
Relief pitcher: threesome?
2002-01-19 01:36:16 PM  

Force Play?
2002-01-19 01:41:46 PM  
So what would an umpire be?
2002-01-19 01:52:29 PM  
Free agent=Hooker
ARod(Alex Rodriguez for the non baseball people)Gold-digger.
2002-01-19 03:13:08 PM  
Alright, finally got another post. This site cracked me up.
2002-01-19 03:18:52 PM  
traded for a player to be named later = dumped.
first base coach = parent.
third base coach = older sibling.
owner = cashhole.
contraction = bud selig.
grapefruit league = see boobies test link, above.agent = pimp.
7th inning stretch = Sports Center.
2002-01-19 03:20:10 PM  
Hall of Fame= Marriage? Um what? I think not.
2002-01-19 03:59:30 PM  
getting good wood on it = recovery from a bud selig.

(thanks FF)
2002-01-19 04:15:19 PM  
Suddenly fantasy baseball takes on a whole new meaning...
2002-01-19 04:30:49 PM  
Don't forget : Fast Pitch - AKA *Minute Man*
Slow Pitch - Moonlight dancing
Fielding the ball - Woman's job
Warming the bench - sitting out
Game ejection - Getting thrown out by the aforementioned umpire.
2002-01-19 04:42:39 PM  
I wouldnt consider my siblings my coaches. Yeeecchh.
2002-01-19 04:56:58 PM  
Banned for life for gambling: Sex without a condom.

That's the best one of the lot.
2002-01-19 05:01:04 PM  
Fielder's choice - tagged out at first or second
Pop-fly rule (infield fly rule) - no comment
Base on an error - mistaken identity!
Storming the mound(s) - a variation of 2nd base
Corking the bat - no comment
Suicide squeeze - HIV partner!
Off the foul pole - no comment
Broken bat single - ouch
Texas League blooper - not enough viagra
2002-01-19 06:39:04 PM  
ESPN = Pornography
2002-01-19 08:02:23 PM  
(Shaking head...) Am I the ONLY one that who thought that whole thing was just dumb?

Siiiiigh... the sole dissenter. Don't hate me though, deep down inside, I'm really a terrible person.
2002-01-19 08:17:36 PM  
internet porn = batting cage
2002-01-19 08:27:47 PM  
beanball = S&M?
2002-01-19 10:09:43 PM  
pitch a no-hitter= cocktease
on deck=peeping tom
win the pennant=watersports (ugh sorry)
2002-01-19 11:22:00 PM  
Hm, next the Sports STAR metaphors:

TO pull a:
Mark McGwire -- to have a record-beating sex marathon, but before you've even forgotten about it, one of your buddies outdoes you.

Barry Bonds -- To be the undisputed king of getting "home runs"

Babe Ruth -- To hold the "home run" record for many, many years, and still be spoken of as legend when somebody outdoes it.

Ty Cobb -- In the mood any time, any where, and by any method. So long as you get to "slide into home", you don't care.
2002-01-19 11:40:34 PM  
No, Wogus, I thought it was really sad too.
2002-01-20 09:15:52 AM  
Since when is sex 3 times in 12 hours a Grand Slam??? Shouldn't that be reserved for something more...difficult?
It sounds like this list was created by an old Fark.
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