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(Tampa Bay Online)   A blood-soaked customer buying clothes and garbage bags will arouse suspicion, even at Wal-Mart   ( divider line
    More: Florida  
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15662 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Jun 2004 at 12:48 AM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

67 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-06-26 12:52:32 AM  
This could also use the DUMBASS tag...
2004-06-26 12:53:00 AM  
In other news, locking your employees inside a WalMart store overnight is also considered suspicious. WalMart commented today by lifting up it's arms and saying, "Just alot of crazy things happen around here I guess."
2004-06-26 12:53:32 AM  
Shoulda gone to Kmart.
2004-06-26 12:53:37 AM  
Everything I know about disposing of bodies, I learend from The Sopranos. What was this guy doing on Sunday nights???
2004-06-26 12:54:05 AM  
The new personal ad looks like a Wal-Mart customer
2004-06-26 12:56:34 AM  
humanfly8 the florida tag superscedes everything else!

Also this is odd, it's never caused any problems at my local Wal-Mart, but that might be because I've got their membership card...
2004-06-26 12:57:51 AM  
In other news, if a cop has nothing to arrest you with, but tells you he's arresting you anyway, and you say he can't do that and walk away, you give him an excuse to arrest you for resisting arrest without violence.
2004-06-26 12:58:00 AM  

Is the membership card tattooed to your hand and they scan it on your way in?

/WalMart, Resistance is Futile
2004-06-26 12:58:10 AM  
I work for the walmart in danvers, Ma And I seen stupid stuff like that all the time NO wait its the customers.
2004-06-26 01:03:31 AM  
At least he didn't carry the body in with him. That being said, I think he has an intelligence level a few notched above the common Walmartian.
2004-06-26 01:05:09 AM  
Chibisuke: scary stuff.

America, Resistance is Futile.
2004-06-26 01:05:15 AM  
And today we have learned an important lesson regarding personal grooming and escaping prosecution for violent crime.

Exam on Monday.
2004-06-26 01:06:34 AM  
I've been in foreign WalMarts. It's a very American feeling. In a way that no foreign McDonalds or KFC can manage. It's like, here I am in a respectable British neighbourhood, yet somehow I'm surrounded by toothless NASCAR fans.
2004-06-26 01:08:05 AM  
Insomniac news junkies might like the video report from ABC 7 Ft Myers. Actually 10 mins of video that includes a bonus murder story and a report on a guy up for the CIA directors position.

On a side note, hom many ABC 7s are there? DC, San Francisco and now Ft Myers. I think it is a cult.
2004-06-26 01:11:56 AM  
Here is another Walmart crime story:
2004-06-26 01:11:59 AM  
I used to live in Naples, they are some real hardasses down there. They once came to my apartment over a noise complaint (I was on the phone at 1am and the old lady downstairs called them). They show up and ask me to step outside. I refused, they insisted. As soon as I took one step out the door I was arrested for Public Drunk. Farking nazis down there.

Naples is Big Money, if you ain't Big Money, you are getting the shaft. Even Alex Lifeson, Rush's guitarist, had a run in with them which ended up with him in jail and bloody.

I also know they wouldn't take the trash unless everything in the can was bagged, this guy was obviously just trying to be a good Neopolitan by bagging his garbage.
2004-06-26 01:12:06 AM  
Insomniac news junky? Not me. I'm depriving myself of sleep and food until the next boobies link.
2004-06-26 01:16:34 AM  
In other news, the I-75 is truly a highway to hell.
2004-06-26 01:17:05 AM  
Chibisuke, I think being covered in blood and buying clothes and trashbags is grounds for detainment by police.
2004-06-26 01:18:08 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Wal*Mart employees will be first against the Wal when the revolution comes
2004-06-26 01:18:19 AM  
In other news, the I-75 is truly a highway to hell.

Agreed, I just can't seem to escape it. I moved from Naples to Marietta GA, and never changed Interstates on the way.
2004-06-26 01:19:47 AM  
DandamanFL, ABC is channel 7 here in NJ

I guess it's the "official" one since it's WABC from NY
2004-06-26 01:21:04 AM  

And I thought my local Wally World was the only one full of blood-soaked inbred mutants buying garbage bags..........
2004-06-26 01:26:03 AM  

Any highway that starts in a bad Detroit neighbourhood should be avoided.

/except by Northern US and Canadian snowbirds heading South in January and North en masse the last day of March
2004-06-26 01:26:57 AM  
DarkSoulNoHope: Nah, I sprung for the "premium-gold-platnium-dimond-plutonioum" membership and they just implant an RFID tag in your forhead. The operation left an odd little scar though.
2004-06-26 01:28:45 AM  
ABC is channel 7 in Buffalo, New York too. I grew up in Toronto (our American stations were out of Buffalo) and remember well Irv Weinstein on Eyewitness News.
2004-06-26 01:29:02 AM  

is it in the shape of a W?
2004-06-26 01:30:22 AM  
He should have left the body in the car and wondered around the store for 12+ hours. That would have been more kosher at Wal*Mart.

And being a Wal*Mart employee, I can vouch for some of the strange customers that roll through our door. What is even more scary is that they are our daily customers that you get to know by first name.
2004-06-26 01:34:15 AM  
Oh come on I work at Wal-Mart. We're not that bad. 99.9% of the trouble I get comes from the customers--not my fellow employees.

Plus, we're right near a provincial correctional facility, so we get all kinds of freaks and losers during visiting hours. Sometimes I fantasize about taking a spiked bat and beating some sense into these people. No one should be allowed to be as rude and stupid as they are.

That, and I've never seen as many pregnant women in my entire life as I've seen in my short time at Wal-mart.
2004-06-26 01:35:54 AM  
And a Florida Wal*Mart at that. Have they stopped medicating the water or something?
2004-06-26 01:41:59 AM  
Working part-time as ICS at wally world, Easy as hell job to sustain my university diet of ramen noodles and computer habits.

We get some crazy farkers on a regular basis but Im in the back most of the time and manage to avoid them. Sometimes I have no idea how the hell Wal-Mart makes cash.. I go through stockrooms with a telson and markups are like -12%.

Its a mental insitution in there! stay away :D
2004-06-26 01:44:06 AM  
He was buring Cheneys body.
2004-06-26 01:52:23 AM  
more obvious sexism.

if it was a blood-soaked woman buying tampons, no problem, but since it's a guy, he's arrested and carted off to jail.

when will the madness end?
2004-06-26 01:57:57 AM  
Damn, why can't all the perps be this stupid?
2004-06-26 01:59:34 AM  
I like a firends theory of WalMart, when you drive in the parking lot you lose 15 points off the top of your IQ. Then for each plastic item you put in your shopping cart subtract 5 more. It seems to fit each time I have to go there.
2004-06-26 02:02:34 AM  
In our home, Walmart is a very painful memory. My beautiful 22 year old niece worked as a pharmacy tech at Walmart and one evening just as she was leaving her job, her evil father gunned her down outside the store because "that was the best way to get back at her mother", that's what his note said. The murder was caught on the store's surveilance video; as was the madman's calm departure which showed him actually stopping for the stop sign before he left the parking lot. We're still grieving it and I guess we still need to talk about it.
2004-06-26 02:11:05 AM  
It's like, here I am in a respectable British neighbourhood, yet somehow I'm surrounded by toothless NASCAR fans.
Walmart, spreading a lil West Virginia culture where they go.
/think thats bad, go to a WV Walmart sometime.
2004-06-26 02:20:50 AM  
"I need a pricecheck for some fava beans and a nice Chianti"
2004-06-26 02:23:06 AM  
Thursday night, I'm repacking a side of beef I got from my cousin that got rained on in transport, and was in danger of all freezing together if I stick it in the deep freeze as it was. I run out of large freezer baggies at about midnight.

So, I go to the 24 hour grocery store to get more baggies, wearing a blood-stained t-shirt. I'm the only guy in the store. Dude at the checkout looks at me somewhat funny, so I say "Ya know, it always seems to take more baggies than you think when you're dismembering a loved one".

He got really quiet. It was priceless. Surprisingly, no brush with the law ensued.

/now watch this drive
2004-06-26 02:23:42 AM  
Omaha's ABC channel is 7, too.
2004-06-26 02:37:02 AM  

Show some respect: I-75 starts at the Canadian border, in Sault Saint-Marie. It goes through an awful lot of nasty neighborhoods (read: Detroit metro), but doesn't actually start there.
2004-06-26 02:47:47 AM  
After doing something like this, I would think most people would act in a strange manner.
/ have a ten hour shift starting at 8
/pray for me,please
2004-06-26 02:48:41 AM  
chicago has an abc 7
2004-06-26 03:15:30 AM  
Gee, I wonder if there was any connection between the bloody guy and the body they found. The suspense is killing me.

At least the Wal Mart in Puerto Vallarta isn't Americanized. The customers are strictly locals. Got a nice backpack there for 47 pesos ($4.40 US), but film (Kodak only) was pricey.
2004-06-26 03:21:16 AM  
Wydock- Good call

Chibisuke Is this a specific incident that happened, and do you have a link?
2004-06-26 03:41:01 AM  
Did he have a ponytail and tatoos?
pye [TotalFark]
2004-06-26 04:37:37 AM  
I've always said WalMart was the shopping centre of the damned. Apparently I was more right than I knew.
2004-06-26 06:29:30 AM  
Best WalMart related story ever:

I dunno if the filter is gonna change the url, but you know the drill folks...
2004-06-26 07:51:37 AM  

Great and I have a birthday party to go to today, perhaps I'll bake the lucky guy a 'nice cake!'
2004-06-26 08:33:27 AM  
He drove off in a pickup, they said.

Isn't this somehow redundant? (guy buying clothes at Wal-Mart)...
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