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Main
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(SacBee) Dumbass A new hero emerges in the quest to free OJ so that he can continue his search for the real killer  (sacbee.com) (16)
(BBC) Cool The US war on Alzheimer's. Never Forget  (bbc.co.uk) (27)
(Stars and Stripes) Sappy Haitian immigrant, rescued at sea by the Coast Guard as a 6-year-old boy, will graduate from the US Coast Guard Academy 18 years later  (ap.stripes.com) (16)
(Gizmodo) Cool New cut of beef discovered: "The flavor is comparable to the New York Strip Steak. It does not require aging or marinating to achieve tenderness." Kinda makes you wonder... What else have those damn cows been holding out on us?  (gizmodo.com) (76)
(The New York Times) Stupid Wal*Mart set to build Alabama location over burial plots of 80 slaves, stage most appropriate haunting in the South  (nytimes.com) (40)
(Daily Mail) Hero 67-year-old man dies after receiving lapdances. That's one way to get 10 dances in a row without paying (NSFW images below article)  (dailymail.co.uk) (36)
(AP) Followup As if being in WalMart isn't trauma enough, NJ man sues WalMart for $1 million after being "traumatized" by a 16-year-old's racist remark  (hosted.ap.org) (54)
(Daily Mail) Cool If you like dogs, you will love giant dogs (NSFW images below article)  (dailymail.co.uk) (56)
(AOL) Hero University issues new contract requiring faculty to accept "Personal Lifestyle Pledge". Faculty members respond with "How about no? Does no work for you? And by the way, we're out of here "  (jobs.aol.com) (119)
(SeattlePI) Followup Seattle Police Department claims Justice Department proposal is unreasonable, says it will be too expensive to stop its officers from randomly bludgeoning innocent people  (seattlepi.com) (74)
 
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Sports
(Deadspin) Amusing It's a bad day for an umpire when players are throwing their helmets and fans their beers at you (video)  (deadspin.com) (17)
(ESPN) Dumbass Kurt Busch, who lost his ride at Penske following a series of outbursts last season is fined $50,000, placed on probation following his actions at Darlington. Furthermore, his ride has now been replaced with a 1994 Buick Skylark with no AC  (espn.go.com) (8)
(TSN) Cool Completing the somewhat rare Fark Hockey Greenlight Trifecta, at 9pm (Eastern) tonight the LA Kings try to go up 2-0 over the Phoenix Coyotes. Will they or will Phoenix even things up going into game 3?  (tsn.ca) (805)
(PFT) Obvious Mike Smith says the Falcons need to change their playoff approach. Step 1 - score more than 2 points   (profootballtalk.nbcsports.com) (22)
(Bleacher Report) Obvious The 15 most overpaid people in sports. What does it take to get to #1? A $30 million salary and an ass-kicking from Chris Evert  (bleacherreport.com) (85)
(Yahoo) Cool The Sixers get their first playoff win in Boston since 1982, when you would have had to read about it in the paper  (news.yahoo.com) (8)
(Fox 4 KC) Amusing Flopping: Flop City vs Manu Ginobili - Too tough to call. Push. Clippers @ Spurs (Game 1 - 6:30PM PDT)  (caller.com) (160)
(Joystiq) Fail Curt Schilling about to eat it  (joystiq.com) (82)
(ESPN) Cool At age 38, Cleveland Indians pitcher Derek Lowe throws his fourth career complete game shutout, currently has a 6-1 record with an ERA of 2.05. Fark: The Atlanta Braves are still paying $10,000,000 of his $15,000,000 salary  (scores.espn.go.com) (30)
(Mirror.co.uk) Amusing Sami Nasri (IAC) gives a special shout out to all the Arsenal fans during the EPL victory celebration: "They should celebrate their third-place achievement and I will focus on winning titles"  (mirror.co.uk) (15)
 
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Business
(AP) Obvious JCPenney "every day" pricing causes loss of customers...every day  (hosted.ap.org) (21)
(Fox News) Stupid Hello, Mr Subby. Sorry to bother you at home... Yes, I see you're on the do not call list, very wise these days, but this is a political poll -- we're exempt. Now then, would you care to purchase a time share?  (foxnews.com) (53)
(JSOnline) Spiffy Goodwill gets a new CEO. Early reports suggest she was lured in by an extremely generous used sweater and broken TV compensation package  (jsonline.com) (22)
(Salon) Stupid Rust Belt cities like Detroit and Cleveland are becoming more popular with young people eager to live in the present-day equivalent of "Blade Runner"  (salon.com) (57)
(Some Guy) Interesting Wall Street Journal claims GM pulling $10 million ads from Facebook because they didn't work. In a related story, WSJ adjusts onion on belt  (mashable.com) (29)
(Yahoo) Silly In the eternal battle of good vs. evil, the Catholic Church has sometimes struggled to lead the forces of righteousness. Not in this case. Today, the Pope has won a major moral victory. A victory against...Benetton  (news.yahoo.com) (17)
(Google) Followup Jamie Dimon wants everyone to know that 23 million bucks stops with him  (google.com) (32)
(Some Guy) Stupid "Investor" is planning on putting his daughter's entire $25,000 college fund into Facebook IPO. "If it goes the Google route, I'll be in good shape"  (businessinsider.com) (211)
(Business News Daily) Obvious 1) Get your Fark on at work  (businessnewsdaily.com) (8)
(Marketwatch) Amusing When you need an erection in the woods, don't forget Dick's  (marketwatch.com) (7)
 
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Geek
(National Geographic) Spiffy Slideshow of National Geographic's "Best Night Sky Pictures of 2012"  (news.nationalgeographic.com) (4)
(Gizmodo) Cool New cut of beef discovered: "The flavor is comparable to the New York Strip Steak. It does not require aging or marinating to achieve tenderness." Kinda makes you wonder... What else have those damn cows been holding out on us?  (gizmodo.com) (76)
(Science Daily) Interesting Drugs harvested from Gila Monster saliva reduces cravings for chocolate and other foods, may revolutionize Type II Diabetes treatment  (sciencedaily.com) (29)
(io9) Cool 10 best time travel movies of all timelines  (io9.com) (283)
(Joystiq) Fail Curt Schilling about to eat it  (joystiq.com) (82)
(Stuff.co.nz) Cool Scientists now using body heat as an energy source. In a related story, Sofia Vergara has been reclassified as a nuclear reactor  (stuff.co.nz) (43)
(VentureBeat) Satire World exclusive Diablo III review  (venturebeat.com) (246)
(Fark) Sad Your official Error 37 thread continues...  (fark.com) (523)
(Gizmodo) Interesting How Yahoo killed Flickr: In the billiard room, with the candlestick. Duh  (gizmodo.com) (21)
(SlashGear) Followup Siri: I'm sorry, did I say that the Lumia 900 4G by Nokia was the best smartphone? I'm sorry, I misunderstood your question. My mistake, won't happen again  (slashgear.com) (60)
 
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Entertainment
(The Hollywood Reporter) Cool ARRRRRRRRRRRRRR, you ready for a prime time pirate drama?  (hollywoodreporter.com) (13)
(Coming Soon) Cool Hulk want break in TV biz. Hulk have plan for new show. HULK SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH RATINGS  (comingsoon.net) (12)
(Coming Soon) Cool Brian De Palma to direct Rachel McAdams and Noomi Rapace in "I'll Be in My Bunk: The Movie"  (comingsoon.net) (22)
(Deadline) Cool Adult Swim orders a Harold & Kumar animated series  (deadline.com) (16)
(The Sun) Amusing Hey, Britney Spears, what's shaking? Oh... well, asked and answered, I guess  (thesun.co.uk) (23)
(CNN) Interesting Black Jewish rapper Y-Love comes out of the closet, is only one square away from Oppressed Minority Bingo  (marquee.blogs.cnn.com) (30)
(io9) Cool 10 best time travel movies of all timelines  (io9.com) (283)
(Yahoo) Interesting Will Smith finally confirms that he is not a Scientologist  (news.yahoo.com) (53)
(Celebslam) Obvious Kristen Stewart should never pose next to Charlize Theron again  (celebslam.celebuzz.com) (179)
(Spinner) Obvious Mark Ronson says Amy Winehouse was "freaked out" by Adele's success, size  (spinner.com) (28)
 
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Politics
(Hot Air) Interesting Voting. So easy a someone pretending to be a non-citizen who can't vote under US law can do it  (hotair.com) (31)
(NewsBusters) Obvious Rachel Maddow: I hate when politicians don't read bills before passing them, unless it's Democrats doing it, then it's the best thing ever  (newsbusters.org) (50)
(Huffington Post) Interesting Subby Here, reporting from Chicago and...... Gahhhhhh..... my ears  (huffingtonpost.com) (285)
(McClatchy) Obvious Quietly, the Republican Party embraces gays, adjusts stance  (mcclatchydc.com) (210)
(Huffington Post) Ironic Wall Street tycoon spends hundreds of millions trying to convince America it's broke and spending out of control  (huffingtonpost.com) (100)
(I Heart Chaos) Amusing POTUS moistens up the ladies of The View by saying "It's always tight when you're Barack Obama." Hey Barbara Walters... how you doin'?  (iheartchaos.com) (70)
(Some Guy) Obvious Git out yer tinfoil hats, boys. This hyar is a list o' lies that the gubment media tells 'bout us  (gunsandammo.com) (198)
(Forbes) Fail "Hi. I'm Scott Walker. I reject your reality and substitute it with my own"  (forbes.com) (159)
(Huffington Post) Obvious George W. Bush: Oh sure, what the hell. "I'm with Mitt Romney"  (huffingtonpost.com) (105)
(CNN) Obvious Romney: Debt is like a prairie fire. Scientists: Prairie Fires are actually an important part of the ecosystem that prevented the prairie from becoming forest. Also, American Prairie is almost non-existent these days  (politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com) (117)
 
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Video
(Wimp) Spiffy Dog has perfect pitch; wants to try out for your band  (wimp.com) (32)
(Bloomberg) Spiffy 12 year old hands Bank of Canada its ass back to them cleaned and pressed  (bloomberg.com) (31)
(YouTube) Video Canadian lacrosse match turns into major brawl, to the delight of all 6 spectators  (youtube.com) (38)
(LiveLeak) Dumbass Fasten your seatbelts for a ride in the Failborghini  (liveleak.com) (73)
(NASA) Cool NASA releases its latest simulated flyover--Vesta  (apod.nasa.gov) (15)
(YouTube) Wheaton Frickin' Zombies with Dice, and Wheaton is Winning  (youtube.com) (30)
(Major League Baseball) Amusing More proof that Jared Weaver is one of the better personalities in baseball  (mlb.mlb.com) (13)
(io9) Amusing Powdered Toast-Man would be on the team  (io9.com) (18)
(YouTube) Video Cutest first pitch failure in history. No, don't try to hit it  (youtube.com) (63)
(YouTube) Cool Happy Mothers Day: Frank Zappa and The Mothers ~ KING KONG; Live on BBC, 1968  (youtube.com) (7)
 
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