trying to get here first for a change

Good job!

"when it burst into flames"
im curious as to what else it could do.. freeze?

But seriously, gotta be careful with them things.... my father had to have his hand put back together from a quick fuse on an m-80 (a real m-80 not the crap they have now) i was like five when it happened, i just remember the blood and nightmares for a couple weeks......

third!

Don't light firecrackers directly in front of your eye

don't do it behind the eye either. Your brain asplode.

I'm excited

must learn to refresh

Simple solution: don't sell fireworks to idiots. It's asshats like this that gave rise to mockeries like "safe and sane" fireworks, as well as all out bans.

it used to be a game for my friends and i to hold m80s as long as possible right up until they sploded then throw them either up in the air or at somebody.. we mustve been one lucky bunch

Well, if I ever feel stupid, least I know i didn't light a firework in my eye, thus making me an intellectual!

Fireworks that aren't dangerous are fireworks that suck.

Caution: Aim away from face.

Had a "black cat" fire cracker (the kind that come in bricks) blow up in my hand, next to my ear. Felt like someone had slammed my hand in a door. I also couldn't hear out of my right ear for about an hour.

/GLAD

Oh oh, one more fireworks headline and we'll have a trifecta!

hmph...

GLAD it wasn't an M80 is what I was trying to say.

We have an old child's swingset in our backyard that is composed of metal tubing. One fine day, I decided to stick a firecracker into one end of the topmost tube. When it asploded, a sparrow fell out the other end. It wasn't dead, just stunned.

/good times, good times...

Yes, be glad, be very very glad......

/whimpering in a corner now from the flashbacks

I saw my friend hold a "dud" in his fingers and it went off. His fingers swelled double their size. What an idiot.

Also i dont recommend throwing a pack (144) of bottlerockets into a beach bonfire with 13 of your closest friends. 4 people got hit..... some scorched clothes was the worst of it.... actually i do recommend it, was funny as hell watching people hit the ground, so long as no one gets hurt

The incident comes four months after a coroner called for all fireworks to be banned after the death of an Endeavour Hills teenager in June 2002.

it took the coroner almost a year and a half to call for the ban of all fireworks after someone died?

You know what that means...now I'll do a dance.

/my eye, it hurts so bad

"Imagine a firecracker in the palm of your hand. Set it off, what happens? You burn your hand, right? You close your fist around the same firecracker and set it off... pff. Your wife's going to be opening your ketchup bottles for the rest of your life."


Or something like that...

Watch out where the huskies go and don't you eat that yellow snow.

And more words of obvious wisdom. Like, don't light yourself on fire, don't hit bullets with rocks, don't put your hand in the garbage disposal and turn it on, don't see if you can gargle with Drano... the list goes on...

Has anyone asked Great White whether this is a good idea or not?

Don't put salt in your eye, either.

/obscure Canadian reference

Nonsense. I challenge anyone to post a link supporting the notion that shrapnel can cause eye damage.

Before the jingoists offer their usual torrent of crap links, let me add a qualifier: unbiased sources, please.

let me add a qualifier: unbiased sources, please.

is there an overwhelming amount of biases on this subject that i don't know about?

The incident comes four months after a coroner called for all fireworks to be banned after the death of an Endeavour Hills teenager in June 2002.

Damn busybody coroner. Natural selection ain't broke-- don't try to fix it.

Surgeon General declaration: "All duds should be examined closely to see why they misfired."

/Stop chasing Darwin away!

"It wasn't dead, just stunned."

Pining for the fiords?

Weird flashback...anyone remember the story last year where a dumbass was showing off and put a lit pipe-bomb in his mouth?

This should have a PSA tag

Had a cherry bomb go off in my hand when I was 10 or so. We were lighting and tossing them, I just held it a bit too long.

NOW I TYPE WITH MY TONGUE!

Actually, no. My fingers turned blue and swelled up for a bit, but we just kept at it, as we had lots more cherry bombs to get through before Mom came home. Kids need to experience stuff like that, it toughens them up.

If they didn't sell fireworks to the idiots, who would then sell them to? =P

Two fireworks articles.....anyone have the trifecta?

rts, that's what I thought of as well.

"Never put salt in your eyes."

Howard Dean: Deep Impact.

/movie dood

rts
Kids In the Hall is NOT obscure.

Large bottle rockets are at their best with a 3 to four foot piece of pvc. Snap off the stick, and have a friend light it while you aim your "rocket launcher" at your neighbor's house/suv/3 year old child/etc.

I speak from experience here.

Any firework that can't blow up a mailbox isn't a fire work.

Xtremehkr

Ever seen Hong Kong 1941? Plenty of aural explosions to be had in that movie.

One July 4th, a group of us were displaying our love of country by dropping acid, drinking beer, smoking dope and setting off fireworks. One of our addled brains got the idea that it would be funny to light a group of m-80's as a team effort. Three of us committed to lighting four each along the top of a rock wall. The plan worked great, all fuses were lit and the demo squad retreated to a safe distance before the first bomb went off, scattering the remaining eleven in all directions. It was like being in an mortar barrage. They were going off behind, in front, above us. The smoke cleared and by some miracle, no one was injured.

35 years of doing stupid things with fireworks with only a small scar below my left eye.

Grevados
ahhh, yes. Bottle rocket wars. Our battles have grown to the size that we now require goggles and safe areas for players to pause for a moment to check for smoldering clothes. And let me tell you, having a black cat bottle rocket hit you in the balls and then blow up isn't the most fun experience you'll ever have.

Yes, sometimes I like to be an idiot, but I wouldn't trade a second of it for the world.

Blasting shiat in the night with Roman candles = fond memories of my misspent youth.

It's farking AMAZING I was never either caught or responsible for thousands of dollars in property damage. By all accounts I should've been hauled in for attempted arson.

/I don't ask questions, I just thank the gods

Funniest headline ev4r!!!1!exclamationpoint

This isn't from the Herald Tribune, it's from the Herald Sun. But oh well, who's counting?

<b>Stupid people</b>